Author

Deborah Cruz

Mommy Truisims ~ Moving Edition

by Deborah Cruz 2011/03/03

Mommy Truisms; Moving Edition ~I’ve learned some hard truisms over the span of my short tour of duty Mommying, thus far. But have recently been bitch slap reminded of a few truisms that I had tried to forget. Moving/Selling a house is never fun.I’ve had the pleasure of moving 3 times since my Ella was born in 2005. If you’ve ever done the frequent moving thing before, you can attest to the fact that I am not stretching the truth when I say it’s as trying as walking up hill in the blistering sun, only to have 1 step up be 2 steps back and you can NOT quit. Frustration is the understatement of a lifetime. So, here I will share a few moving truisms that may be helpful, in the very least amusing at my expense.

Moving Edition

If perpetual cleaning is your idea of a good time and you have small children, you should put your house on the market immediately.Like right this moment. Seriously!
While packing, you will “hide” put so many things up away from children, that you may as well kiss them goodbye because most likely they are in the home sellers Bermuda triangle. Rest assured, they will NEVER resurface ( case in point, the Vivitar digital cameras I bought the girls for Christmas 2009. Where are they?I don’t know.Oh ,yeah…BERMUDA FRICKING TRIANGLE.)
Apparently, leaving your “Nads” in your sink drawer is a bad idea. No one wants to by a house from a monkey woman.Go figure. This also applies to your medicines. Nobody wants to know your flavor of sick or crazy. Turn those labels around or throw them in your purse on the way out.
If you have “personal” items requiring batteries, a plastic tote is not the best storage spot for it unless you like inappropriate smiles from your realtor. Also, if you “hide” it under the bed, be sure to remember to “find” it before the movers do. Also, come on, you should know better you have kids:)
Shitty diapers left in the garbage do not a house sell. Don’t test this one. Just take my word for it.
If your house went on the market in the middle of blizzard weather and on the day you have a showing scheduled it is unseasonably warm, melting all the snow in your yard, it is mandatory that you spend the 3 hours previous to viewers arrival cleaning up and disposing of any and all dog shit mine fields that have been revealed.
There is nothing more fun than packing up 2/3rds of your children’s toys and stacking in the garage. Oh wait, yes there is. That would be your children knowing they are there and whining for them on the regular…daily.
When people view a house, they DON’T want to know that children or dogs have ever soiled your house. Hide all evidence of children and family pets.

Mommy Truisms ~ Moving is Hardwork

The most angelic and well-behaved children will turn into Tazmanian devils and dirt monsters when faced with a pristine house.
Trying to keep your house clean for showings while living with rambunctious preschoolers is as futile as trying to stay on a diet in a house made of chocolate cake, held together by frosting. It is equally as frustrating.
Showings will most likely ALWAYS be scheduled at your child’s bed time and if they are sick, showing frequency will certainly increase.
Finding something to do with overtired little ones, at their bed time, is a lot more difficult than it should be or you would ever imagine. Unless of course you are partial to whining, crying & over reactions…which I am not.
Convincing a 5 year old to move and leave her school and friends is so much easier once you wear them down and they have hit their limit of missing their daddy.12 months..FTW!!
When moving, sometimes you have to endure some negotiations with your children in the name of the greater good. For example, you don’t want to leave the house you were born in? I’ll buy you bunk beds…at the new house. You don’t want me to pack your toys up? I’ll buy you a trampoline when we get the new house. You want to be a Tazmanian devil and sweep through the house like a monsoon leaving death and destruction in your wake? I will build you a treehouse at the new house. Damn, I sure hope the new house has a big bag of money buried in the backyard.
Baking cookies to give the house a “comfortable/inviting” smell is great as long as you don’t get distracted by your 1 year old who you spy out the corner of your eye about to leap from the coffee table to the ottoman. Burnt cookies…not so inviting a smell. Also, cooking bacon for breakfast the day of a showing…not such a great idea either. You’ve been warned.

Moving is Near Impossible with children

These are just a few. There are many, many more. What have you learned about yourself and your children while moving or trying to sell a house?

2011/03/03 11 comments

Entertainment

Aye Carlitos! The Man, the Myth, the Magic!

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/28

written by Deborah Cruz

Carlitos,

My Hispanic brother, how I long for the days when you were the hot jock in Lucas. The brawny athletic type with a heart of gold. How you made my teen girl heart swoon. I always loved you because you were such a “real” guy. Well, real as far as the men I had grown up around. Of course, most of those losers have ended up in AA! Your behavior was not out of the norm. You were a child star, you didn’t play by the same rules as the rest of us. You never had to. But you took what you had and you made it your bitch. Obviously, somewhere in there, you became a bitching ,totally fricking rock star from Mars. A Warlock with tiger blood and Adonis DNA, some might even say. I know your life is epic and you are proud of who you are and what you’ve done for yourself.I totally respect your crazy strong will and how you have decided to not accept defeat as an option.Go you and your winning attitude! Never let them get you down, Carlitos. So what if you get to play your real life on TV and make 2 million dollars an episode? That’s certainly no reason for people to be “leaving you to twist in the wind like some sucker getting shanked in the yard?” You’re right, they are jealous.Silly mortals.

But I do have to say, I think you are better than this. And I’m led to believe that ~~hookers~~ goddesses don’t make the greatest of housewives.You deserve better, Carlitos..you are a winner. You beat drug addiction by making the conscious choice to will it so. You are awesome. Duh? You’ve done what it takes most mere mortals several attempts at rehab or AA to do! I also don’t think it’s such a good idea to explain your “epic” ordeal with your kids before they reach the teen years. Well, actually after they hit their 20’s that is fodder to be most certainly thrown back into your face. Damn kids, you know how they love to lay on the guilt.Ungrateful little bastards, after you have an entire house full of Goddesses at their beckon call.

TMZ: I met one of your sons on the way in – what do you do when one of your sons comes up and says I wanna try beer, or cocaine?

Sheen: I would strongly recommend against it, but if he wants to try a beer, do it here. At least he’s not drivin’ around like some clown. Like some amateur.

At least you have your priorities straight! No amateurs here. If you’re going to do it, do it right!Go for expert! Go for broke! I like your enthusiasm.

I saw your interview with Rossen on the Today show. How I appreciate your candor and honesty.Awesome that you totally tested “clean” on your drug test..three times according to your TMZ interview. Nothing gnarly about that!Pretty fucking radical if you ask me! Only 45 and you have totally harnessed all the secrets of the world. But I am beginning to wonder, if you did indeed test clean, might this small mental “infarction” have been caused by a gnarly case of Syphilis? I mean, not to be rude, but given your history, I think this could be a totally plausible reason behind the behavior. If it is, I think everybody owes you a great big “I’m sorry”. I mean, Syphilis is a real disease not a choice. Either way, I think maybe you should get yourself and the Goddesses tested. Better safe than sorry.Unless of course, you do in fact have a hyper sensitivity to Ambien. “Ambien has a half life of 22000 decades, that might have had something to do with it”( In reference to his watch freak out episode) Which could also very logically explain away the entire situation. Of course, I’m just a lowly mortal housewife…not too epic and Ambien wears off in me in about 10-12 hours. Though, I have been known to do some pretty wacky tweets when all hyped up on Ambien. Who knows how things could have went south if I had the money and genius to take it to the next level? I guess we’ll never know:(

Anyways, just wanted to tell you that we are all pulling for you! I don’t blame you, I’d have no interest in their retarded opinions either. I’d probably have to get down with some crack and booze if I had to spend my days hanging out with Duckie too! They don’t know you! Stay strong, Carlitos and remember “The scoreboard doesn’t lie! Now, flash Mama that “winning” smile of yours!

Truthful Mommy

P.S. Can I bring you a cheeseburger or something? You look a little hungry.

2011/02/28 8 comments

breastfeeding, breastfed, breastfeed, lactation, feeding infants, breast-feeding, nursed, feeding babies, breastmilk, benefits of breastfeeding

Confessions

Breastfeeding Sucks

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/27

written by Deborah Cruz

Is breastfeeding really always best? I was reading, my friend, Jennifer Brandt’s blog Perfectly Disheveled tonight and was reminded of something that I had buried deep within the recesses of my mind…BREASTFEEDING! Oh how it sucked! No pun intended. It was one of the most awful things I have experienced thus far in motherhood. I know its not PC to admit that breastfeeding sucked for me but hey, that’s how I roll. I am honest to a fault. I always thought that breastfeeding would be something beautiful and magical; a sacred bond between mother and baby. And it was but it was also something else. It was what most Hollywood actresses look like without their hair and makeup done, no stylist standing by, no PR person to spin their words into weaved gold. It was raw, it was painful , it was ugly and, on most days, it hurt me deeply. Breastfeeding kicked my ass physically and emotionally. Worse than that, it was humbling. From the beginning, breastfeeding made me feel like the world’s biggest freaking loser Mommy! Amen. I’m divulging the truth that it was for me.

I remember coming home on that first day, driving 15 miles an hour with our blinkers on trying our best not to damage or mess up this most perfect being that we had just been given. We cooked this baby good and read all the books but when it came down to it, we couldn’t believe these people were going to let us take the baby out of the hospital. After all, what the hell were they thinking? We didn’t know what to do. We could barely keep one another alive, plants were dying all over the house, I’d lost a dog but these assholes wanted me to keep an entire human being alive! WHAT?? Panic set in but there was no turning back. We were going to hold onto this halo/fog of new baby splendor as long as we possibly could. The key was to keep the baby in tact.

We arrive home. Hello baby! This is your new house. The whole world, in its entirety, will be forever changed. You will be the sun and we will rotate around you forevermore. Time for a nap. Gently we place the baby into the bassinet and then its time to turn off the lights, pull the room darkening shades and SLEEP. But wait. That won’t work. If the lights are off we can’t see if she’s breathing. If we can’t see that she’s breathing..maybe she’s not. No! Sorry this plan will not work. Abort mission. Abort mission! Turning off the lights won’t do. Instead, we collapsed in exhaustion laying across the bed, with our heads half in the bassinet, with the ceiling fan light turned all the way on! Just about the time my brain and heart gave way and allowed my eyes to close, the baby woke up..starving. Let the breastfeeding commence. No lactation nurse, no holds barred. Let’s do this.

To my teet I drew my baby. She suckled. She didn’t latch very well. I knew that my milk hadn’t come in yet, as the lactation nurse had already informed me of my ineptitude before I had even left the hospital. She, also, had set me up with a medieval contraption known as an SNS. Not familiar with this? Oh, aren’t you the lucky girl? SNS stands for Supplemental Nursing System which is basically today’s scarlet letter for you are a fucking loser who doesn’t have the capability of feeding your own offspring. That’s right, there are broads in the world breastfeeding their boobie nectar to chihuahuas and I can’t keep my own human alive. Fuck. It was the Chia pet all over again. I was panicked that I was going to have to be dependent on a breast pump that is electric. I was popping Fenugreek like they were the last tic tacs in the world. Anyways, those were my choices…Fenugreek and SNS…until my milk dropped. What does that even mean? It’s not like a gallon of formula is going to come spilling out of me. I pumped..barely a taste for my infant. So, I grudgingly hook myself up to the SNS. Picture, if you will, some sort of human type version of what is used on cows. Basically, it was a small container that you filled with formula, that hung around your neck. There was a very small tube attached to that which was then taped to the top of your breast and down at the nipple.For me, that meant atop the nipple shield. It was a pretty hostile site. Poor baby Bella. Why couldn’t her Mommy just produce like all the other Mommies? I don’t know baby. These fucking D boobs apparently are for fun and not function.ARGH! The humiliation.

Why had breastfeeding forsaken me? What had I done wrong?

As I sat there, her looking up at me, questioning what wrong she had done in a previous life to be saddled with such a worthless mom, was enough to break my heart. But I soldiered on because I wasn’t stopping until that milk gave in and came in. I was going to breastfeed this baby if it killed me or broke me. Oh, don’t you worry…it almost did. I called the nurse and she barked at me to only do the SNS every other feeding and only an ounce so that it forced the baby to suckle harder and force my milk to drop. I listened because, quite frankly, this is her job and I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. Then in that first 24 hour period, Bella fed every 1/2 hour. Do you know what that means? She was literally off my tit for about 5 minutes every hour for 24 hours. She was crying, out of starvation. I was crying out of frustration, humiliation and guilt. I felt like the biggest piece of shit Mother to EVER walk the earth..even lower than those broads who drove their kids off a bridge. By the next morning, constant crying ( on both our parts) and no sleep, I was at my most vulnerable. And the baby was looking pretty much like an Oompa Loompa. I’m not going to lie to you, I lost my ever loving mind when I realized I had broken the baby. The perfect little baby.

I called the doctor and he said to bring her to the hospital. I was raw. OMG. I was the most exhausted, vulnerable, crazed lunatic on the maternity ward. Oh yes, they made me return to the scene of the crime. The nursery. Immediately, they took one look at our Willie Wonka cast member and told us that our baby had jaundice caused by my malfunctioning bossoms! It was as if someone kicked me in my hemorrhaging crotch, smacked me in my sore raw nipples and yanked my heart out through my chest all while laughing at me. I left the room and ugly cried hysterically…uncontrollably. The Big Guy was freaked out, his baby was orange and his wife was out of her mind. The nurses knew it was hormones. They tried to soothe my fears but it was impossible.

The moral of the story is even after all this, I continued to nurse for 3 months…with the SNS system because I NEVER produced enough milk to sustain my child. NEVER! But that damn lactation nurse kept telling me to keep taking the Fenugreek, it will come in. Then she told me to withhold formula, then I lost her number. I have never felt like such a failure. To this day, it still makes me hang my head to know that I couldn’t just breastfeed. It’s like being 30 and still riding a bike with training wheels. If you’re expecting a child, I would suggest you prepare for your breastfeeding journey. You may search for a breast pump covered by insurance along with other equipment and supplements you’ll need.

But because I would have been ridiculed by everyone I knew and scowled at for not trying my damnest, I did it again with my second child and again we ended up in the hospital with jaundice. Breastfeeding isn’t for everybody…no matter what people say. If I could have, I would have done it for longer. I did love the bond we formed during that breastfeeding time but if you pan out in the pictures, you can clearly see that I was strapped to that SNS contraption which was neither sweet or bond conducive. So, I say to you…for me…BREASTFEEDING SUCKED!

Did you breastfeed? For how long? Was it easy? Was it hard? Did you use an SNS? Would lengths would you go to succeed at breastfeeding your baby?

Breastfeeding is NOT always best for everyone

Photo

2011/02/27 25 comments

Weight Loss

Nutrisystem Update Week 16~

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/27

written by Deborah Cruz

This week was by far one of the worst weeks that I’ve had on my Nutrisystem journey, as well as one of the worst weeks that I’ve had in the month of February. I gained 2 pounds. How did this happen, you ask? To my chagrin, I traveled all last weekend and that created a little hiccup in my diet. I did have meals on hand but we were on the road and I ended up eating out a couple times. Even worse, when I returned home, my back went out. Which meant two things, I was not able to work out. To be honest, I could barely sit upright without wincing. I could NOT walk upright. My back felt like a rubber band pulled to its absolute extreme.I was just waiting for it to pop and snap. It’s done it before and I’ve ended up incapacitated in the praying to Mecca position or flat on my back on the floor. Either scenario not optimal, especially with the Big Guy out of town. I couldn’t even drive the car to get my Bella to school. This was serious business. My sister had to catch a train and come to my rescue, which meant she resumed all my duties while I took my meds to relax my back and keep the insane pain that accompanies such injuries away . It was a real big hot mess around here. While I was in La-la med land, lying flat on my back atop of a heating pad or ice ( depending on the moment you checked in on me) I did not eat appropriately. I didn’t get all my foods in and I wasn’t drinking enough water. The entire week was a wash. It was of no fault of the program, it was me not working the program. But, the back is doing much better and I am pain free,med free, standing upright and drinking my water so I am hopping back on that horse and making it work for me! This weight is coming off, kicking and screaming maybe but it is coming off.

I am so proud of what I have accomplished so far with Nutrisystem. It is a great feeling to see the scale going down. It’s even more encouraging when the clothes start to bag and droop. This small hiccup does not worry me. Nutrisystem is a fabulous program and I know it works. The key is to keeping within the guidelines of the program. So the lesson here is..if you don’t work out, don’t eat the Nutrisystem foods and veggies, fruits, and dairy that you are supposed to, don’t drink the recommended daily amount of water and simply have the Nutrisystem food sitting in the pantry…don’t expect it to work. But if you are serious and want to lose the weight, get healthy in your own skin and be the best you that you can be…Nutrisystem might be for you! Visit Nutrisystem today or call 888-853-4689. Don’t forget right now, Nutrisytem is at the lowest price it has been since 2003! There is no better time than the present to get started on your journey. Bathing suit season is right around the corner!

DISCLOSURE: Nutrisystem is providing their program to me free of charge in exchange for my participation in the Nutrisystem Nation Blogging Program and weekly updates. I am not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed in this post are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255

2011/02/27 0 comment

Entertainment

A Promise Ring; Friendship with benefits, if you will

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/26

written by Deborah Cruz

My beautiful little sister came in town this past week to rescue me from my back who had taken it upon itself to vacate the premises. She is awesome like that. She dropped everything, hopped a train and resumed all of my regularly scheduled duties!God, how I love her for that. Her and I have always been very close, despite me being 5 years her elder. We have the best rapport. We also have the best conversations about everything under the sun. She’s my sister, so there’s a definite no holds barred quality to our time together. We are very much alike in most ways but we do differ on one thing…the TV that we watch. What I am saying is that I’m the Vampire Diaries, Grays Anatomy,Private practice type and she keeps MTV in business. So we were talking about TV the other day and she told me something about the Brett Micheals show that literally made my laugh my ass off. And I am thanking God for this conversation because without her unending knowledge of all things scandalous, I would have went my entire life without laughing this hard.

My sister recapped an episode in which Brett Michaels gave his “girlfriend”,Kristi Gibson, a promise ring. Just let that marinate for a moment or two. A FUCKING. PROMISE. RING!!! They have been together for 16 years with 2 children, who are 10 and 5. This means she has not only been his on again off again girlfriend the entire time he’s been doing his Rock of Love show but she was sleeping with him and having his children. And he gave her a fucking Promise ring! There were rumors that he had FINALLY proposed last July but he said “No” and called the ring a “Friendship ..with benefits” ring, basically what she had been to him all along. No one needed a fucking ring to know this. It’s like he was saying, Hey, you’re good but there might be something better out there for me. I’ve only fucked about 30 % of the 20 year old population, give me a little more time.I’ll get back to you! *This is not a direct quote but a loose interpretation of what Mr.Michaels may have been thinking:)

Isn’t a promise ring something a 13 year old gives his girlfriend ? I mean, even the Jonas brothers pony up an actual engagement ring and they are practically fetuses. If I were Kristi Gibson, I would probably have kicked Brett Michaels in his balls and snatched his do rag ( hair and all) off of his head. That was not only an insult it was injurious to her spirit…and he apparently did it in front of cameras. Plus, it was after he had already endured his whole health fiasco. So it was more desperate times desperate measures type of indulgence than a show of his true love for her. It was like a great big smack across the face that said..Maybe! When my sister told me of this reality TV flop, I couldn’t stop playing the whole train wreck in my mind. It was on repeat on an endless loop ( like those 80’s hairband love songs that I used to lull myself to sleep with when I was a wee teenie bopper myself…waiting for my own promise ring:)LOL How apropos.

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Photo courtesy of the internet

I guess sometime around Christmas, Brett Michaels made it official and actually proposed to Kristi. It was the season finale of his show Life as I know it , how convenient. What some people won’t do for ratings. It only took 16 years. I hope to God there was a new ring, something of the 10 carat variety to help squelch some of the embarrassment of giving a grown woman who’d endured the ring of fire ( not once but twice) for you. Myself, I still hope she , even though she said yes, kicked him in the balls and snatched the do rag off just for good measure. It would only be fitting. Because giving a grown ass woman who has stood by you for 16 years and had your children, is about as close to snatching a do rag and kicking a lady in the balls.

A.FUCKING.PROMISE.RING!!

* It has come to my attention that he did NOT give her a new ring, but used the same ring and has not set a date. Saying something to the effect that it may be the longest engagement in history. I’m pretty sure the only way she’s getting him down the aisle before they are 80 is if another health scare presents itself.[/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

2011/02/26 8 comments

Throat Punch Thursday

Throat Punch Thursday ~Chuck Norris Karate Chop crazy edition

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/24

written by Deborah Cruz

Seems like this week, I have two recipients tied for Throat Punch Thursday. Imagine that? The first one comes to us via Kenya, Africa. This is the scene, a couple welcome into the world their new baby boy. To their disappointment he is mentally handicapped. Fast forward 30 years, Thomas ( the baby boy now a man) tied to a bed surrounded by pools of his own urine. Imprisoned like this for the past 30 years by his parents.They have no choice. Angry and fearful neighbors have been chasing the family from village to village because they are afraid that he will attack them. This forces his parents to lock him in a shack, away from the outside world. They have to lock him away to keep him safe from the ignorance of the villagers who find him to be a threat. For now, Thomas’ family feels like they are being punished because they are not allowed to live their life in peace. So, who gets the throat punch you ask? Well, obviously the villagers for being so freaking ignorant and letting preconceived notions rule the world but also Thomas’ mother. Believe me, I understand the feeling of being overwhelmed and exhausted with a situation. I understand she wants a break from her misery. I understand that it’s a lot to ask of a person, even a mother, but she goes on to say that she has never known joy since she has been married. I got the distinct impression that some harm may befall poor unsuspecting Thomas..and it won’t be at the hands of the villagers. That may be a good alibi but from the video I felt that Thomas’ mother may be on the verge of driving her cow over the edge of a very steep peak with Thomas tethered to it. So, my throat punch has to go to his poor ,exhausted and tired mother. I feel that a hefty kick to the head may be just what is needed to knock some sense into her head!

Next Throat Punch goes to CANCER! You heard me right..Cancer! Poor little toddlers should not be having to deal with brain tumors and cancer. If they are unfortunately inflicted, it is our duty as parents to do whatever it takes to make them as comfortable as possible. We need to improve their quality of life, especially when the quantity may be drastically shortened. There is nothing I wouldn’t do to cure my child or save their life. You remember that movie John Q with Denzel Washington? That’s me..I am of the John Q parenting technique. So, I say, if medicinal marijuana is going to help my child who has been in such pain that they have not eaten for 40 days feel some comfort. You bet your sweet ass, this Mommy is going to administer medicinal marijuana if prescribed by the pediatric oncologist. I’m not saying that I’m going to go out to the seedy part of town and score some ganja on my own but I would certainly do what needs to be done, to help my child. So, cancer and judgmental assholes who have never had to hold their 3 year old down to have a forced spinal tap done to confirm a leukemia diagnosis and think that it is “wrong” or “unethical” to administer a doctor prescribed relief from the torture..THROAT PUNCH to you, right up side your head. I know the concern is the damage to short term memory and killing brain cells and all that but if my child were diagnosed and dying, living on borrowed time…why should it be the government’s choice what my own flesh and blood, fruit of my loins, my heart walking free in the world should have to endure in the name of what is politically correct? In my world, as in most parents, my number one priority is my child. Sometimes it fits the parameters of PC, others maybe not but that’s not my concern. John Q rules! Chuck Norris karate chops to cancer!

2011/02/24 4 comments

Parenting Throat Punch Thursday

Toddlers,Tiaras and Mommies who need to shut their whore mouths!

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/23

written by Deborah Cruz

Apparently, TLC is hell bent on skewing reality so badly that they are actively trying to change the curve even worse than they already have with toddlers and tiaras. TLC, the channel who used to bring us informative information about hermaphrodites, little people and people so obese that they had to be cut out of their homes has decided that it takes a village to ruin childhood…and they want to be the mayor of that village. That’s right people, MTV has some definite competition. Well, I can say this, MTV has at least the decency to wait until our children are teenagers or tweens to provide them with an arsenal of extraneous sex, bad language, and examples of lewd and lascivious lifestyles to emulate.TLC has, however, decided that if you want to destroy a child’s life completely and in its entirety you need to get a much earlier start. You know, don’t put off til tomorrow what you can destroy today!

First, there was Toddlers and Tiaras. Don’t get me started. I know some people find it entertaining to see little girls dressed up like whores by their morbidly obese , white trash mothers and paraded about like prize cattle..all in the name of “My daughter’s the prettiest and I know this because I just spent $4000 for my daughter to win a $500 scholarship and the title of “pretty girl” How fucking ridiculous is this? What are we teaching our daughters? Oh yes, that’s right…we are doing our solid best to perpetuate the myth that our daughters only worth is in what they look like and what’s between their legs. WHY? Can we all repeat after me, JON BENET RAMSEY! You see how that turned out? Is this really what we want for our girls? Spray on tans. Flippers for little girls missing teeth. Hair pieces. Whore make up. Revealing clothing.Suggestive dancing. Little girls having complete mental meltdowns because they are being taught, by their mothers who are supposed to love them unconditionally, that they are only worthy of love if they are wearing a bedazzled tiara because these broads are living vicariously through their little girls. Just one more reason to support my theory that some people needed to take an IQ test before being allowed to conceive!

Now, TLC, has kicked it up a notch. TLC has seen fit to develop a show called Outrageous Kid Parties. I know you are thinking, so what? I mean, I thought I was a little over the top inviting 100 people to my Bella’s 1st birthday party. Or a little silly that every year my girls have a themed birthday party complete with costumes. Yes, last year we did have a Moulin Rouge themed birthday party for a 5 year old. What can I say, the kid is theatrical. We’ve had Fancy Nancy tea parties that were so extravagantly catered ( by my husband and I ) that people asked who we had cater the function. We’ve had cakes brought in special from a bakery in Chicago.Then there was the Bellapalooza incident of 2009. I’m not going to lie. I put a lot of time, thought, love and sometimes money into my girls’ birthday parties. I think it has a lot more to do with giving them what my parent’s couldn’t afford to give me. But never..NEVER would, could, should I spend $32,000 on a kids party. Aside from the fact that I couldn’t afford it without taking out a second mortgage on my house ( which, by the way, I’m saving for their weddings), I would never want to do something so completely insane. Jeez people, this just in..Kids starving in Africa while you are paying $3000 for a birthday cake!WTF????

That’s right, TLC, has taken the whole My super sweet 16 MTV show and made its very own version for the toddler/elementary school set. It is so ridiculous that it may actually make my head spin right off my neck. This annoys me for several reasons.One, who can live up to these unbelievable standards? Two, what are we teaching our children? The celebration of one’s birthday should be to commemorate the day they were born, not the day their parents went broke. Are we trying to raise a generation of gold diggers? Has no one heard the saying “Everything in moderation”? Excess of anything, even a good thing is NO BUENO!!! What’s next, TLC presents Skins for babies? What? Don’t look so shocked. With everything else TLC has deemed reasonable, why not?

What are your thoughts on excessive extravagance for children? What are we teaching our children? Or do you think as long as we can afford it, the sky is the limit? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

2011/02/23 12 comments

Health

My neck, My back, my neck and my back!

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/23

written by Deborah Cruz

I’m sure more than a couple of you have been wondering where the hell I’ve been over the last couple of weeks. Well, I think I at least owe you an explanation. First, there was the cleaning/packing/moving rampage a couple weeks ago. Trying to prep a house to go on the market is harder than trying to prepare for childbirth. It’s a lot of hard work and frustration, especially when you have littles that want nothing more than to destroy every single thing you clean. I have discovered , in the past month, that my girls are in fact part Tazmanian devils. Lucky for me, right? So, I’ve been perpetually cleaning my house.

Then the week after that, my girls were sick with some weird alien virus that mimicked the flu and to compound the hellish nightmare of two children under the age of 5 being sick simultaneously, they also developed a gnarly case of eye ball oozing pink eye! WHAT THE FUCK!!! So, between trying to keep the house immaculate, I had to add to it wiping eye boogers, cleaning puke up off the floor, keeping 104 degree fevers in check, keeping snot rags in the garbage ( my Bella likes to drop Kleenex where she stands..sort of like her Dad and his socks), keep the girls separated and Lysol down all areas of our home. We were quarantined in a full on Cootie village of our very own. So, obviously between all of that..I was MIA from all social media and my blog.

Last week, the girls were feeling better and I just knew that it was time to jump back into my social media world that I feel so warm and fuzzy in but then my server decided to take a giant dump! Seriously, I heard a lot of you complaining about January. Well, I just want to go on record of saying that February may be the shortest month of the year but, for me, it’s been sucking hardcore! Working over time at trying to see just how awful it can be. It has certainly given January a run for its money. So, last week I spent a better part of Monday through Thursday trying to get the server situation straightened out! Just in time to get a call about a showing on our house. I rushed around the house like a crack addict, cleaning, straightening the garage, moving boxes and finished up just in time to leave for my scheduled trip out of town, to interview prospective schools for my girls.

As I was driving, I felt my back stiffening up but I was just so over extended that I didn’t have the time to give it any attention. As if back pain can be ignored or denied, I kept on with my plans. The weekend went off with minimal aggravation. Then I drove home Monday morning. By Monday evening, I was incapacitated. I could not walk. My back completely went out. I’m sitting here, after two days of a steady consumption of pain pills and muscle relaxers, and I can barely sit upright. Apparently, popping pills like they are tic tacs does not make the back happy. It’s going to take a lot of rest and a more effective back pain management.

My girls were amazing, Bella was adorable pulling the kitchen chair over to the microwave and heating up my heating pad. Gabs kept refilling my water glass. It’s amazing what littles can accomplish when they really want to. Just one more thing that blows my mind about my girls! Thank God my own little sister was able to take the train in and rescue me and help out with my girls. I was beginning to feel a little bad about the girls doing everything.

Anyways, that’s where I’ve been lately. I’ve not forgotten about you or the blog. I’ve simply been inundated with life but I am trying to jump back in! I miss you ladies, loads! Happy Mothering!!

2011/02/23 7 comments

Weight Loss

Nutrisystem Update~Week 15

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/20

written by Deborah Cruz

This week, I’m happy to tell you that I have lost another pound on Nutrisystem. This brings my grand total to 18.5 pounds total in 15 weeks. It’s been yet another crazy week of packing, cleaning, traveling, wiping noses and trying to fit 30 hours of things to get done into 24 hour days. Lucky for me, Nutrisystem makes deciding what to make for dinner and controlling my portion sizes extremely easy.

For once, in a very long time, I am finally looking forward to summer and shorts weather. I am so optimistic with the progress that I’ve been making on Nutrisystem that I can’t wait to see how much its paid off once it’s time to shed some of these layers of winter.How about you? Are you excited for warm weather and bikini season? How are those weight loss resolutions coming?

It’s never too late. We still have a few months before bikini season and Nutrisystem has the lowest prices they’ve had since 2003! Now’s the time to try Nutrisystem and be on the path to the new you that you want to be for 2011! For more information please contact Nutrisystem today!

2011/02/20 9 comments

Entertainment

The Winner of the Chicago Shakespeare Theater’s Macbeth family 4 pack Giveaway

by Deborah Cruz 2011/02/19

written by Deborah Cruz

The winner of the Chicago Shakespeare Theater family 4 pack to Macbeth is ….
comment # 2, Bertha “OMG, I LOVE Shakespeare! I have always wanted to see one of his plays and have never had the opportunity! I also am within 20 min of Chicago, so to be able to enjoy a Full day of festivities in Downtown Chicago is also something I don’t get to do very often, But would love the chance to! English was one of My Strong points in school, and Macbeth was one of My favorite plays, so please consider me when giving these tickets away! Thank You so Much!”

Congratulations and I hope that you have a wonderful time at the play. You will have a blast.Please email me at truthfulmommy@gmail.com so I can get your information to get you your tickets!For the rest of you, I hope you will still go see the production. It is always a fabulous time and stay tuned, there is usually a production every couple of months.

2011/02/19 0 comment

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