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Mean Mother Focker

by Deborah Cruz

This morning, I was all excited walking around the grocery store.You know, it was Monday..my favorite day of the week.I was in desperate need of replenishing the fridge, since we had been gone all of last week. I was walking around, patting myself on the back because I was buying all organic and free range this and that. I spent a small fortune in the grocery but no worries. I was trying to find redemption with the food gods from all the hydrogenated, greasy, fat that I had put in my girls bodies over Spring break. That is nothing to speak of the damn burrito as big as my head that I consumed. (Shhh, it was totally worth the 1.5 pounds I gained.) That thing was sinfully delicious.But I digress…..yumm….burrito.

So,I’m walking around the grocery all head up my ass in a great effing mood for a Monday and then it happened.As Gabs and I were perusing the cereal aisle, contemplating which cereal would be the best tasting and the healthiest ( because today that was way up the list)and a mommy with a newborn happened toward us.She looked haggard and exhausted.Oh how I remember that feeling.Of course, I extended the Mommy olive branch and gave her the sympathetic “I feel your pain” smile and said, “Hi,I’m sorry are we in your way?” Which we clearly were not but I was trying to segue into “How old is your baby?’ “OMG, she/he is so freaking adorable”

What did she say? NOTHING.She completely ignored me and to add insult to injury pushed past me with the “You are such an asshole” look. WTF? I was flabbergasted and then I set straight to finding the “it’s not you, it’s me” scenario. Because clearly, it was HER!This is what I came up with:

  • Perhaps, she was deaf and did not hear me speak to her.
  • Perhaps, she doesn’t speak or understand English.
  • Maybe, she was so exhausted that she was incoherent, on Mommy autopilot.
  • Maybe she had a raging case of explosive diarrhea that was about to erupt.
  • Perhaps, she was heavily sedated.
  • Maybe she was rushing to get outside because her 3 year old was locked in the closet at home?
  • Maybe her dog was projectile vomiting in the car?
  • Maybe she was part of some weird scavenger hunt in which she was supposed to collect peoples happiness and dash hopes.
  • Maybe the baby was stolen.
  • Or maybe,she was just a mean Mother Focker.

Either way, you never know what’s going through someone’s head or in their lives so I can only worry about me. I was annoyed for a minute ( maybe a couple more) but I went home and had a fabulous free range, grass fed, organic lunch with my girls and replenished my joy knowing that as she rushed passed me she carried with her a trail of toilet paper.I told you maybe she had explosive diarrhea. I would have told her but ,you know, she was so busy being deaf and making ugly faces at me that she probably wouldn’t have heard me anyway.


In case you missed it…I was featured on SheKnows Top 10 Blogs that will make you think. I am so thrilled and honored to be on this list among so many great bloggers and it was written by one of the bloggers who I respect the most, Naomi AKA Cool Whip Mom.

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Tina @ Life Without Pink 2011/04/11 - 11:03 pm

I just dont get people seriously! I’ve had this happen before where my kids have done something and I laughed and looked over at another parent who gave me a “your kids are annoying” look. Seriously! People w/parents should I understand. This girl was probably just miserable from lack of sleep, that’s what I am going with!

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 8:48 am

You are probably right. I remember being exhausted and in my own world. I hope she isn;t really as miserable as she appeared and was jut shaving a bad day.

Dana K 2011/04/11 - 11:06 pm

LOL I Really do try to smile & say hi to people even though I’d rather stay in my little comfort zone of quiet introspection. It pisses me off when people are even less friendly than I am. It’s the reason I hate Groton, CT…long story…

Sorry you met a soul-sucker with explosive diarrhea & a bad attitude.

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 8:51 am

I always say hi to people.I was just raise that if I am walking pass someone and eye contact is made, it is simply rude not to say hi.Of course, my Mom is form the south so maybe that has something to do with it. It just always blows my mind when people don;t respond.

Kristin 2011/04/11 - 11:06 pm

Yes, explosive diarhea. That’s my vote. lol

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 8:53 am

Is it wrong that I’m rooting for explosive diarrhea as well? I mean, at least then she would have a good excuse for such poor behavior.It;s hard to be chipper and social when you are about to shat yourself.

Mommy Nani Booboo 2011/04/11 - 11:16 pm

Clearly you were right in the money with the diarrhea… full of shit.
Good for you for remembering we don’t know what’s going on in any one elses lives.

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 9:27 am

LOL! Perhaps she was full of shit and perhaps it was something deeper. For her sake, I hope it was just a bad day.I’ve tried to be more aware that I don;t know people’s situations since I;ve had my own children.I used to NOT be like that but these days, I try and give everyone the benefit of the doubt. But then again, she could just be a mean Mother Focker:)LOL

Teresa 2011/04/11 - 11:20 pm

And here’s the little bird reminding you of giving people the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps she had PPD. Not that she wasn’t awful to you, but its possible she was in the depths of depression and was seeing the world through black tinted glasses.

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 9:24 am

YOu are so right. I do try and keep that in mind.I really do. Just like when I see people now, I try and not be judgmental because I know that every one is somebody’s child and somebody thinks they are awesome. Besides I can only control my actions. I try and put out there what I want to come back but sometimes thats not how it works out. I hope that she was just having a shitty attitude and not PPD or something worse going on in her life. Thanks for the reminder.

Coolwhipmom 2011/04/12 - 6:42 am

Bwaahahahaha!!! This post totally made me die laughing. Because I have totally been there. That gal was definitely a mean mother focker. But I thoroughly enjoyed your list of other options. Heh. And congrats again on the top 10 list. You know you are my love. I adore you!

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 9:19 am

I know. That broad was raining on my parade. I was in such a good mood.BUt I try to remember that people have shit going on that I have no idea about. Maybe her cat just got diagnosed with cancer or her husband was a real bastard to her. WHo knows. I tried to be nice. I only control me. SO, I will do my best to be good in the world and the rest is on her.
And thanks so much! That list means more to me than you can imagine! I adore you too! And i miss the crap outta you! You and Laura have both been MIA on me:( I feel like a SheKnows friend widow:)LOL XO

MommyMatter 2011/04/12 - 8:09 am

Last week, my Mom and I were out shopping with BabyGirl and we ran into this cute elderly couple. You could tell they fully expected to be confronted with snotty, stick up our butts people, but we were quick to enjoy a random conversation with a random person.

BabyGirl was entralled with the older man, and of course, my Mom made a joke that they could put her in their cart and shop with her. (BabyGirl is one of THOSE kids shopping, bad, loud, snotty and rude to all that look at her) She usually drives my Mom and myself up the wall when we shop, but we don’t let her party pooper attitude prevent us from shopping!

Long story short, this elderly man such a sweetie. We kept running into them the rest of our shopping adventure and had a chuckle. It reminds me why we are nice to everyone, you never know who you can put a smile on during what could be the roughest day they are having.

I’ve learned even if I am grumpy while out shopping, I don’t be rude to others, they aren’t the cause of my grumpiness. The little kid sitting in the cart on the other hand may be!

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 9:15 am

I completely agree.You never know who that person is that you are smiling at. You may be saving a life or making a day:)Keep on with your sweet social self!

A Mommy in the City 2011/04/12 - 9:34 am

People can be so rude sometimes. I probably would have given her a nasty look back. 😉

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 9:45 am

LOL!I may have. I have really animated facial expressions and I’m a hand talker. So I very well may have unknowingly rolled my eyes at her. This is why I don’t lie.It is impossible to hide the truth.My face tells on me.ANother reason I don;t play poker:)LOL

nic @mybottlesup 2011/04/12 - 9:47 am

i only blow people off that badly when they’re REALLY old (because they usually try to pat my kid on the head) and even then, jackson is the one who gives them the eat shit and die twice look before i do.

that being said, i’m going to go with her being sedated… i can’t grocery shop without being sedated.

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/12 - 10:01 am

I only need to be sedated if I try venturing into the 7th level of hell known as Wal mart. My girls always make me chuckle when strange old men try and say hi or chat them up. I’ve taught them so well not to talk to strangers that they look at them like they are complete asshats for even trying to converse.

julie gardner 2011/04/12 - 11:14 am

People are baffling to me. You are wise (and unnecessarily kind) to recognize that her lack of any kind of friendly response was about her, not you.

How difficult is it, in this crazy chaotic life, to take the time to at least return a smile?

Even if you don’t wish to engage in conversation.

If someone is extending warmth and goodness in your direction, at least smile.

When I was a new mom? I would’ve hugged you. Or dropped to my knees in gratitude. I needed all the love I could get!

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/13 - 3:38 pm

Julie you are sweet.I agree I would have jumped at the chance for some adult interaction but then again I;m friendly by nature.Maybe she isn’t. I don’t know her story.I just know the part she played in mine:)LOL

XLMIC 2011/04/12 - 12:14 pm

PPD? Who knows.

It is hard when you are trying to connect and trying to be nice and you get not only a brush-off but an “asshole” look 🙁

January 2011/04/12 - 2:00 pm

I find this happens a lot with other Mom’s….I can’t figure it out…but I’ll have to refer to your hilarious list when it happens next! I usually have my hands full with my 2 boys but I TRY my best to be pleasant and polite…if only to ensure my boys see that and do the same. You simply never know what’s going on in another’s life. You may have just bumped into her at a very bad time during her day…I remember feeling comatose in the early days with my first. Wandering around like a listless zombie. Don’t we all?

liz 2011/04/12 - 4:00 pm

Some people seem to live with a permanent chip on their shoulder. I’m sure it’s not you. 🙂

Dana 2011/04/12 - 10:49 pm

I had a similar experience today. I ran into a gal at the playground I’d met once before (with whom I share a mutual friend) and said “Hi, aren’t you T’s friend?” “Yeah…” Okay, lady. I was just trying to be friendly seeing as how we’ve met before, we’re both pushing our kids on the same swingset here AND we have a friend in common but clearly I’m the weird one for saying hello.

Dana 2011/04/12 - 10:49 pm

I had a similar experience today. I ran into a gal at the playground that I’d met once before (with whom I share a mutual friend) and said “Hi, aren’t you T’s friend?” “Yeah…” Okay, lady. I was just trying to be friendly seeing as how we’ve met before, we’re both pushing our kids on the same swingset here AND we have a friend in common but clearly I’m the weird one for saying hello.

30ish Mama 2011/04/12 - 11:32 pm

I love the list of options you have to explain her crazy behavior, made me laugh out loud : )

Perfect Dad 2011/04/13 - 11:25 am

I think it was the explosive diarrhea, you’re probably right. You were lucky she rushed passed you because you would have been obligated to help her clean or at least console her if she exploded right in front of you as you chatted.

jess 2011/04/24 - 9:41 pm

Omg hilarious!


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