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miranda kerr, drugged baby, mommy wars

Miranda Kerr, Mind Your Own Vagina & Stop Flaming the Fires of the Mommy Wars

by Deborah Cruz

miranda kerr, drugged baby, mommy wars

Miranda Kerr, Mommy or Obstetrician?

I didn’t realize that Miranda Kerr was not only beautiful, procreating with Orlando Bloom and an OB/GYN! Holy shit, talk about having it all. Wait! Miranda Kerr, you are not an obstetrician? You are just a woman who has given birth, like the rest of us but with a rocking Victoria Secret body? Well, then please keep your medical advice to yourself. I will however take your beauty advice. When I was pregnant with my first child, my obstetrician told me that there are no awards for going through the most painful childbirth; there is no trophy and your child will not love you more. However, Ms. Kerr she never told me that my kid would be “drugged up”, I’d be a sissy if I took an epidural and you would be an infinitely better mother than me. Maybe I would have chosen differently. Probably not, but thanks for bringing it to my attention. Mind your own Vagina, Miranda Kerr.

Actually, I had greatness thrust upon me. I had an unwanted natural labor because my anesthesiologist was in surgery when I was in labor. Did your eyes just get really big and did your vagina start to hurt? Yeah, imagine how I felt. I got my epidural at 10 centimeters dilated. It was recommended that I just forgo the entire thing but I was in such pain and desperation that they gave it to me at 1/2 strength. Hell, it may have been a placebo but damn it I didn’t care at that point. I vaguely remember the anesthesiologist telling me the risks and something about the possibility of never being able to walk again. Anyone who has ever experienced transition labor unmedicated knows, I didn’t give a shit if I couldn’t walk again. I just needed the pain to stop. He could have offered to put a bullet in my skull to stop the pain and I would have happily agreed so long as that pain stopped. So, Miranda Kerr, I give you props you are no sissy. You willingly and purposefully gave birth unmedicated. Go you but that does not give you the right to tell the rest of us mothers how to give birth. Mind your own vagina, stay out of mine.

Miranda Kerr, Stay our of my Vagina

I had to survive the entire transition labor unmedicated. UNMEDICATED.PEOPLE!! That may be all well and good if you choose it and are mentally prepared for the pain but its not the kind of surprise you want to have happen to you at the hospital. It hurt, a lot.A.LOT!!!  I wanted to jump out of my hospital window and kill myself to stop the pain. You see how giving birth is a near death experience for the mother? I’m pretty sure had I done that, it would have more adversely affected my baby’s start in life than taking the epidural. The epidural is what stopped the pain enough for me to stop considering jumping out the window and focus on bringing my beautiful baby girl into the world. You are not a doctor so shut your mouth and mind your own vagina, Miranda Kerr.

Being a mom is hard enough without other moms judging us for our parenting choice, little lone our pregnancy or birthing choices. I guess there is no time like the moment of conception to start the Mommy wars. Miranda Kerr, I think it’s awesome that you made a choice and stuck by it. I don’t judge you for your choice in childbirth. I, however, chose to have the epidural because it was the best choice for my child and myself. It was the best way I could survive childbirth. It was the best thing for my child because the less stress on me, the less stress on her. You chose differently but it’s just a choice and yours is no better than mine just because your have a bigger platform to make your choices heard. Being a celebrity doesn’t make you an authority.

Miranda Kerr, Mind your own vagina and I will mind mine.


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Heather 2012/07/09 - 5:58 pm

You tell her! I too was 10 centimeters getting an epidural. It all happened so fast for me that they almost didn’t give me the epidural! I was begging for it! In my head I think I may try to go all the way next time – that is until the pain starts, then I’ll probably be begging again!

Deborah Cruz 2012/07/13 - 2:25 pm

You do whatever feels best for you and your family and your delivery. It’s nobody else’s business what we choose, certainly not some random celebrity. Just because they publish every word she says doesn’t mean that she has anything worthwhile to say:) You are braver than me if you go all the way next time. I was scared straight on epidurals and birth with the first one:)#ImAChicken

KalleyC 2012/07/12 - 11:58 am

I hate when women try to keep the mommy wars alive. You don’t win a medal for going through one of the most painful thing in your life, drug free. PLEASE!

It’s here to help us if we want it. At the end of the day, we all became mothers regardless if we pushed with help or without.

Deborah Cruz 2012/07/13 - 2:20 pm

At the end of the day, giving birth is HARD WORK and it’s painful and it’s a very personal choice. For whatever reason we choose what we think is best for our family so people should just respect that we survived it the best we could, right?

Jess 2012/07/16 - 4:12 pm

She’s on crack. I can’t even imagine and wouldn’t want to, not having the epidural. fffffffffffffffffffff that.

The Mommist 2012/08/06 - 7:54 am

Well said! She gave birth to one and suddenly thinks she’s an expert. Way to go, Miranda. It all depends on the pain threshold of a woman. It’s a crime nowadays to endure pain especially in vast amount such as labor pains.
I gave birth to two and was pumped up with so much good stuff (anesthesia). My vagina’s happy, my boys are happy, everybody’s happy. I, thank you.

P.S. Your site rocks!

Kayla Dwendall 2013/03/31 - 7:52 pm

Im sorry but I have to give credit to Miranda Kerr. I have meet her, and think its great for her if she wants to have a natural birth! Especially being so tiny like her. She’s NOT on crack, and she and Orlando have a very good relationship and love thier baby. If she wants to have a natural birth, that’s her problem, not yours! Why should you care? She’s not telling you what to do. Stop going all defensive momma on her. She is a very sweet girl.

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