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Throat Punch Thursday~ GoDaddy Animal Snuff Edition

by Deborah Cruz

This week’s Throat Punch Thursday is being given to GoDaddy CEO Bill Parsons. Why you ask? Now, before you go getting your panties in a twist that I am administering a Throat punch to the man who is CEO of your web host site, let me tell you why. You will be changing your mind after you see what Mr. Parsons has been up to.Let’s just say, it seems that money can buy you just about anything these days. You ever watch the Hostel series? You know Hostel where men with loads of money and too much time on their hands can go over to Eastern Europe and pay obscene amounts of money to be able to experience murdering someone? Yeah, it’s a lot like that minus the human aspect of it. Here, I will show you, judge for yourself. But be warned what you are going to see is by far one of the most vulgar and macabre scenes that I have ever had the misfortune of bearing witness to. You be the judge.

I know that people hunt. I know that people hunt big game. But do most people video tape the entire incident and stand proudly by their victim taking photos with big creepy grins on their face? Something about it struck me as very serial killerish. You know how a killer likes a momento? The only thing missing was a Buffalo Bill skin suit, mommy issues and a wenis dance. Oye, I’m scared. I’m not a hunter so I really don’t know. But is this typical big game hunter behavior? Maybe they all do it? What do I know? I was a vegetarian for 10 years and a card carrying member of PETA. I took more than one class on ethics and animals in university and maybe I am a little biased about this entire situation. Bottom line is that the video, especially the ripping of the bull flesh by the starving villagers touting their “GODADDY” bright orange hats coupled with the AC/DC music, pretty much made me vomit in my mouth. I mean, did he think that music was funny? Or the appropriate soundtrack to this inhumane murder? And I’m positive that I will be having nightmares of that creepy ass look on his face in the photos. It was like a snuff film, but I kept looking for the *April fools or * No animals were actually harmed in the filming of this macabre home video but alas, it never came.

Mr. Parsons it is my duty as a child of the human race to bestow upon you the Chuck Norris Monkey toe round house kick to the head and his head splitting throat punch to the gullet for your heinous crimes against the elephant. And for the AC/DC track you used, I am giving you the Truthful Mommy bitch slap.My advice to you, don’t exhibit such disgusting behavior and if you are going to, don’t fucking video tape it.



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Dana K 2011/03/31 - 6:07 pm

Thank you. He deserves far more than a throat punch…

Truthful Mommy 2011/03/31 - 8:53 pm

Amen!Something like a chuck Norris monkey toe round house kick to his head.

Celeste 2011/03/31 - 6:23 pm

Sittn here w/mouth dropped to floor. This has to be like a Saturday Night Live skit or something. Please tell me it is or I’m going to be seriously traumatized….and this mama ain’t got no therapy money!

Truthful Mommy 2011/03/31 - 8:48 pm

I do not mean to traumatize but as far as I know, this is true. I was waiting for someone to pop out and April fool me but it never happened.people are just sick.

Perfect Dad 2011/03/31 - 6:52 pm

I was going to post an article about hunting sometime, but I’ll just at to your in the comments.

Here is one that made me so angry: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2cigYF6ejA

The hunter slays a sable, then comes looking at his freshly murdered animal unable to contain himself about how beautiful the animal was, looking at it, carefully brushing off the leaves and dirt from its face. I really don’t like that guy.

Another is at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbuzBGQT4GY

That guy just shoots his bow at any poor thing he sees, proudly talking about how awesome the bow is. Justa’ grinnin’ away about how manly he is to be able to hid and shoot animals from a far distance. He really enjoys surprising those birds and monkeys with an arrow into their bodies, happy to see them run, then struggle in confusion as their bodies fail to work and they lives slip away.

One thing to hunt for food, but it isn’t something to be happy about.

Sarah 2011/03/31 - 8:56 pm

I realize that people hunt… some of my friends even. But this was so sick. The AC/DC just took it to a whole other level of sick. I’m glad that you gave him your throat punch. I was hoping that someone would. Not that I’m a huge GoDaddy fan anyway (their commercials are just so stupid and Danika Patrick… really you guys?) but, they lost more of my respect over this one.

Truthful Mommy 2011/03/31 - 10:15 pm

I agree,the AC/DC just made it all macabre to the next level.

Samantha S 2011/03/31 - 11:00 pm

I couldn’t even watch it. I have family that hunts, but they eat what they kill. This made me really happy that I host with DreamHost.

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/01 - 6:07 am

I know people hunt and I say, if you are going to do it, at the very least eat what you kill. If not, it’s a waste. My problem is not only with what he did but more so of how he did it. His “Screw you people, I can do anything I want” attitude that unnerved me. It was like he was daring anyone to judge him with that video.

Breann 2011/03/31 - 11:45 pm

Holy shit… Have had a post make me laugh so hard yet get so mad all at once!

Truthful Mommy 2011/04/01 - 6:05 am

LOL! THank you. I feel as if my job has been done:) Thanks for stopping by.

Fabulous Five Friday 2011/04/01 - 9:25 am

[…] you the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth with a side of Throat Punch on Thursday here! Happy Friday,my Friends! Share this […]

Jess@Straight Talk 2011/04/01 - 3:57 pm

Sorry my dear, but I’ve got hunters in my extended family and they get damn proud of their stuff. My cousin has pics all over his Facebook of him holding up the antlers of a [fill in the blank]. I don’t necessarily have a problem with that because then he’ll take it and process the meat and eat it.

But hunting big game (going on safaris that cost literally $100,000) so you can say you killed a lion or whatever the hell? Not so much. At all.

At least do that shit out of the public eye, dude.

Carri 2011/04/03 - 8:59 pm

That guy is a total fuckface. Good job, Debi!

XLMIC 2011/04/03 - 11:05 pm

Right on.
A well-deserved throat punch.

The TRUTH About Motherhood | How Media Temple Rescued My Blog from GoDaddy - The TRUTH About Motherhood 2013/04/24 - 11:08 am

[…] sure to catch up with me but to be fair, we signed up with them a couple of years ago, before the elephant episode and before the disgusting GoDaddy.com nerd-slobbering kiss of Kate Upton. Both situations worthy of […]

The TRUTH About Motherhood | Melissa Bachman Murders Endangered African Lion for Sport & Fun - The TRUTH About Motherhood 2013/12/01 - 4:58 pm

[…] I don’t hunt. I don’t believe in guns and I don’t believe in hunting for sport. If I had no option and my kids were starving, I would hunt for survival but never for sport. What kind of monster must you be to take pleasure in killing an animal who is minding his own business, simply existing in his own habitat? It’s like we learned nothing since the Bob Parson’s incident. […]


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