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The TRUTH About Motherhood

Author: Deborah Cruz

  • Coping with the Deafening Absence After Losing Your Dog

    Coping with the Deafening Absence After Losing Your Dog

    Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

    There’s a reason they call dogs “man’s best friend.” They worm their way into the deepest crevices of our hearts and become inextricable parts of our families. So when the day comes to say goodbye, it absolutely shatters you.

    Last year, on May 6th, our beloved Lola, a sweet, quirky Victorian bulldog who’d been by my side for over a decade, passed away. Her loss left a chasm in my soul that still hasn’t closed, even weeks later.

    Our Lola was more than just a pet – she was our furry child, a bright light during one of the darkest chapters of our lives. Back in 2012, my world imploded after suffering a devastating miscarriage and losing our first boxer, Saffaron. I vividly remember curling up night after night, hollowed out by grief, utterly convinced that my family would never make it through that gaping void of compounded loss.

    Then, on December 14th of that same year, Lola quite literally pranced into our lives – a tiny ray of hope swathed in a big pink bow. From the moment we locked eyes with her sweet, gentle spirit, we knew she was our family’s redemption and path to healing. Lola filled every nook and cranny of our broken hearts with her pure, unconditional love.

    She was there for us through all the ups and downs over the next decade – our steadfast, loyal companion who sensed our every sadness and snuggled up to us until the sorrow temporarily melted away. When I shattered my leg in 2015 and couldn’t walk for 3 months, Lola stayed dedicated by my side day and night, raising my spirits in a way only she could.

    Our bond went far deeper than most people share with their household pets. We loved our Lola as fiercely and wholeheartedly as we love our human children. So you can imagine the earth-shattering despair when her health began rapidly declining in the summer of 2022 due to Cushing’s Disease.

    Why Losing a Dog Leaves You Broken

    For months, I had to hand-feed Lola, spoon by tiny spoon, as she grew weaker and more emaciated before my eyes. My heart shredded further each day watching her die a slow, undignified death despite our relentless vet visits and medication protocols. It’s impossible to know when to let go. We were in constant contact with our vet to make sure that she wasn’t in pain,

    I tried preparing for the inevitable while paradoxically holding out hope for a miracle. I told myself “When the time comes, at least you’ll know you cherished every second with her and eased her suffering in the end.”

    But as all my fellow pet parents know, those affirmations offer little solace when you’re suddenly staring into the eyes of your beloved fur baby and realizing this might be the last time. On May 6, 2023, Lola collapsed in the yard, finally succumbing to her illness. The light faded from her warm brown eyes as she locked her gaze on mine, silently communicating this was her final goodbye.

    That pit of dread and grief was all too familiar, conjuring up the anguish of my miscarriage – that same powerless feeling of watching someone you’d give your life for slip away. I promised myself I’d hold Lola until her final breaths, stroking her soft fur and reassuring her that everything would be okay. For hours, I cradled her in my arms, violently sobbing as I felt her tiny heartbeat grow faint under my fingertips.

    When the inevitable occurred and Lola finally stopped breathing, a part of me went still and cold too. We rushed her to the emergency vet not to save her, but to ease her transition to the other side since she seemed trapped between two realms. Standing in that sterile lobby begging strangers to help my baby as her limp body hung in my arms…I’ve never felt so hopeless and hollowed out.

    How to (Try to) Heal a Shattered Heart

    Lola was more than just a beloved pet – she was a child to me, a treasured family member whose cuddles and kisses provided comfort unmatched by anything else. Her love helped carry us through some of life’s most traumatic, arduous valleys. And now, home no longer feels like home; living in a Lola-less house each day is like being stabbed anew.

    My morning routine is forever altered – there’s no tiny wagging tail to greet me or watchful brown eyes following my every move as I get ready. No affectionate snuggles as I breakdown in tears reaching for her favorite soft blankets that still hold the smell of her. I see her everywhere yet nowhere. One saving grace is that we have Stella, the Dogue de Bourdeaux we adopted the spring before we found out Lola was sick but even so, our Lola was irreplaceable.

    Friends and loved ones with the best intentions still mention our sweet Lola. But they couldn’t possibly comprehend the permanence of this loss. Just like humans, our pets leave indelible pawprints on our lives that we’ll carry forever.

    While the searing pain of acute grief does inevitably dull over time, for those of us who love our pets as our own children, that dull ache never fully disappears. We simply learn to rebuild our lives around the holes they’ve left in our hearts.

    One step at a time, one fond memory at a time, we transform our sadness into newfound gratitude for the unconditional love they bestowed upon us. For me, this pain transcends just being “sad Lola’s gone.” More than anything, I feel deep regret, knowing we’ll never again experience her constant companionship, her intuitive snuggles on my darkest days, those small joys that comprised my “normal” for over a decade. No other pet could ever replace the sacred space she occupied.

    So if you’re grappling with this same devastation, please be gentle with yourself. Don’t beat yourself up for days when you can’t pull it together, because this grief is incredibly disruptive and all-encompassing. Let the waves of sadness crash over you – cry until your heart feels hollow again if you have to. Your pain is valid and real.

    Most importantly, keep your beloved pet’s spirit alive by sharing their story and honoring their unconditional love. I’m finding solace in reliving all the hilarious Lola tales that made our family roar with laughter over the years. Though our home feels emptier without her tiny paws clicking across the hardwoods, she’ll always be our guardian angel on the other side of the rainbow bridge.

    In time, we’ll be able to celebrate Lola’s life without feeling consumed by tears. We’ll adopt another rescue and pay forward the boundless affection she shamelessly showered us with each day.

    Until then, we’ll continue leaving the porch light on for our sweet girl, so she knows there’s still a way back home to the people who love her most.

    A Call to Honor Our Beloved Pet’s Memories

    I’m sharing Lola’s story today because I know I’m not alone in feeling this profound, seismic heartbreak and upheaval after an adored pet passes away. Whether your baby had fur, feathers, scales, or something else, their absence leaves a cavernous void that humans are simply not equipped to navigate gracefully.

    So let’s build a community to uplift each other through these brutal, raw moments. If you’ve ever lost your own furry BFF, please leave a comment sharing their name and a fond memory that still makes you smile through the tears. Let’s swap coping strategies, survival tips, and most importantly – humor and hope that our pets’ legacies will carry us through the darkness.

    We’re in this together, opening our arms and hearts as wide as our four-legged friends taught us unconditional love means. Hug your babies a little tighter today and be ever-grateful for their pawprints on your soul. After all, it’s better to have loved and lost an irreplaceable pet than never experienced their extraordinary, once-in-a-lifetime companionship at all.

  • I Never Got to Hold You

    I Never Got to Hold You

    Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

    Cry. It’s the only thing my body could do when I heard that cruel word – miscarriage. I wanted to scream, to rage against the injustice, but I couldn’t. The words stuck in my throat as an icy fist gripped my heart. All I could do was cry these deep, guttural sobs that seemed to emanate from the core of my soul. How does miscarriage affect a woman? It changes everything about it. 

    My unexpected miracle, that little life I never dreamed I deserved, was gone. Snatched away far too soon. Those two bright lines on the pregnancy test had filled me with hope, excitement over the promise of a love like no other. But in an instant, that beautiful promise was shattered, coldly labeled as nothing more than a “miscarriage.”

    I shattered right along with it. My heart broke into innumerable pieces as I struggled just to breathe through the anguish. Uncontrollable sobs wracked my body as despair closed in – I had never felt so lost, so utterly and hopelessly broken.

    The Devastation No Mother Should Face

    We hadn’t shared the joyful news with anyone yet, too petrified of jinxing our fragile happiness. I had seen my sister’s devastation after her miscarriage at 9 weeks. At 10 weeks and 4 days along, I thought I was safe. I wasn’t.

    The haunting look on the ultrasound tech’s face said it all before she could speak the words – there was no flickering heartbeat, only a perfect, still little life within me. My world imploded in that moment. Waves of screaming anguish and denial crashed over me, the physical pain indescribable.

    How Miscarriage Shatters a Woman

    The torment of losing an unborn child is one of the most traumatic, heartbreaking experiences any woman can endure. It leaves you hollowed out and gasping, struggling just to draw your next ragged breath through the searing pain. An icy numbness seizes you as your hands desperately clutch your body, craving the feeling of that life within that’s been so cruelly torn away.

    You want the world to stop spinning so you never have to move past this nightmare moment when your deepest hopes and dreams withered before your eyes. The thought of others pitying you, or trying in vain to rationalize your devastation, makes you want to curl deeper inward and shut everyone out.

    Just let me be, you want to cry out. Let me feel the full weight of this mountainous loss, this betrayal of everything I’d dared to hope for. Don’t try to placate me – simply allow me to bear the burden of these primal, animalistic screams of grief tearing from the depths of my very soul.

    Don’t touch me. Don’t speak empty condolences. Just let me drown in my darkness, my personal hellscape where life makes no sense and all dreams have turned to ashes.

    For that tiny life was your promised dream of unconditional love, a blessing you never imagined deserving. And that promise now lies horrifically shattered, leaving you hollowed out, empty, and feeling irreparably betrayed by life itself. Words hold no meaning when every shallow breath reminds you of the indescribable anguish clawing at your lungs.

    All you can do is cry.

    When the Anguish Never Fully Fades

    As you read these words, I was at the hospital having a D&C because I couldn’t fathom carrying my lifeless child within me a moment longer. I should have been joyfully sharing our pregnancy journey, but instead I’m laying bare the most visceral, agonizing loss a mother can endure. Writing it out is the only way I know to keep breathing through this all-consuming pain.

    Even now, over a decade later, I can still feel the lump permanently lodged in my throat whenever I think of my Declan – the son I loved with every fiber of my being yet never got to hold, not even for a fleeting moment. His entire existence amounted to morning sickness, wistful daydreams, and countless tears. So much he’ll never experience – sunrises, sunsets, his sisters’ laughter, his dad’s soothing voice at bedtime, my whispers of unconditional love and pride surrounding him.

    I’m angry and feel forever cheated, because he’s been gone longer than he was ever here. It will never make sense, this unfathomable cruelty, and I’ll never stop feeling gutted by the gaping wound his absence left behind. Even on my calmest days, the injustice still leaves me wanting to rage at the universe, to throw tantrums and scream at the sheer unfairness of it all. Why them and not us? Why don’t I deserve that happiness too?

    This pain ebbs and flows, but it never fully goes away. There’s always that dull yet persistent ache, that sense of missing your own vital organ whenever you see other mothers and sons embracing the futures you’ll never experience. I mask it and pretend I’m okay, but I’m not. Not completely. Miscarriage leaves invisible scars that indelibly change you.

    A Call for Compassion and Healing

    If you know someone suffering through the unimaginable agony of miscarriage, don’t minimize their pain with platitudes or toxic positivity. Extend a compassionate embrace, a listening ear, and an acknowledgment that their grief is valid and whole. Let them cry, scream, and metabolize their shattering loss however they need to in that moment. Offer your presence, not pity.

    Because having a dream, a part of your very soul, ripped away…it leaves a deep wounding that time doesn’t fully heal. We owe it to ourselves and each other to remove the stigma around pregnancy loss and create spaces where women can openly process their breathtaking pain without shame or judgment.

    Share stories like mine, or those of your loved ones, to raise awareness. Let other women know they don’t have to suffer in silence and loneliness when their worlds have fallen apart. Validate their anger, their confusion, their soul-deep mourning, and remind them that this sisterhood of survivors has their back.

    One compassionate conversation at a time, we can make spaces for healing and grace to coexist with the anguish that consumes us on our darkest days. Because even if we never “move on” from such a shattering loss, surrounding each other with empathy and love can ensure that no woman has to bear miscarriage’s tremendous burden alone.

  • The Honest Truth About Mom Burnout

    The Honest Truth About Mom Burnout

    Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

    Hey mama, let’s get real for a sec. That exhaustion you’ve been feeling? The short fuse, the cynicism, the desire to abandon ship and move to a remote island away from tiny humans? Girl, you’re burned. the. fuck. out. Mom burnout, it’s not a joke. 

    I get it, I really do. Motherhood, while incredible, is a marathon like no other. The relentless cycle of caring for kids, managing the household, maybe even clocking in at a 9-5…it’s enough to turn any woman into a brittle, hollowed-out husk just going through the motions. 

    But what if I told you there’s a way to pull yourself out of that dark pit of burnout before it swallows you whole? Spoiler alert: Self-care isn’t just a trendy buzzword. It’s a critical survival tactic for moms on the brink.

    Now, now…before you roll your eyes and claim you “don’t have time for that,” hear me out. I’m about to drop some game-changing, mom-tested secrets for injecting those self-care habits into your life in tiny, sustainable ways. No luxurious spa weekends or Marie Kondo-level overhauls required.

    The Bare Minimum, Maximum Impact Routine:

    Become a Morning Person (Yeah, I Said It)

    Those pre-kid wake-up calls might seem like fresh hell, but here’s the truth bomb: Waking up even 30-60 minutes before your little ones do ensures that you have a sliver of precious “me” time to myself. Read, journal, meditate (enjoy your coffee while it’s still hot) or even just get ready…do whatever soothes your soul before the morning chaos erupts.

    Top Tip: Place your alarm across the room, so you’re forced to GET UP. Trust me, hitting snooze robs you of this sacred recharge window.

    Schedule Your Mom Burnout Breaks 

    Working mom or stay-at-home, we all need periodic respites throughout the day to pause and catch our breath. Set recurring reminders to take 5-10 minute breaks: a quick walk ( or a 5K…whatever makes you happy) around the block, a warm beverage on the patio, or a solo dance party in the living room (this one doubles as cardio!).

    The key is being ruthless about taking these “burnout breaks.” These momentary reprieves act as a reset, helping you avoid those meltdown moments of overwhelm.

    Reclaim Your Shower 

    We’ve all had days where showers feel like monumental chores we don’t have bandwidth for. Except showering, when intentional, can be a micro self-care ritual!

    Create a spa-like experience by upgrading with a loofah, body scrub, and luxe hair products. Turn on a timed water-resistant speaker and belt out anthems like you’re Taylor freakin’ Swift for 20 blissful minutes. Emerge anew, a rejuvenated, pruney ( experiencing substantially less mom burnout) goddess!

    Get Horizontal 

    I’m orbiting closer to midlife, so downtime is precious. But whenever possible, I’ll drop onto my bed for 20-30 minutes and simply lay there, supine and sans responsibilities. I rarely am able to nap, but a night mask goes a long way to concealing that fact. They don’t need to know I’m awake. Think of it as a “do not disturb” sign. 

    Read, doze, or simply press the reset button. Little rituals like these, while small, have massive energizing effects to carry us through those burnout danger zones.

    Happy Hour (The Mocktail Edition or not, you’re grown) 

    As an unwavering low tox enthusiast, I’ve sworn off hangovers as self-care. But mixing up delicious, whimsical cocktails is still my fix! These days I’m more into nootropics and adaptogens but whatever makes you happy. 

    Blend up mocktails with fresh juices, herbs, and bubbles for an effervescent happy hour experience. Or reserve wine glasses for refreshing aguas frescas. These tiny oases of tranquility will whisk you away, if only briefly, from the mom grind.

    Listen, friend. I’m not here to preach about finding the glorified “life balance.” That mythical ideal is a toxic trap that just fuels our burnout cycles! We can have it all, just not all at the same time.

    Instead, I’m offering you these micro self-care habits to ease the load incrementally. Do them regularly, or don’t do them at all. Self-care without guilt or pressure!

    When we make replenishing our cups a non-negotiable ritual woven into our days, we rewire our perspectives. What once felt like an indulgence becomes a survival staple.

    And from that point, everything shifts. We shed the frantic, all-consuming burnout haze and rediscover the joy in this wild ride of raising humans. We’re more present, patient, and emotionally replenished to show up boldy for our families.

    That’s the truth, mama. So go ahead, put on your tough-but-needs-love mom blinders and commit to these bite-sized acts of self-preservation. I’m rooting for you!

  • Why Your Personality Might Be Sabotaging Your Career

    Why Your Personality Might Be Sabotaging Your Career

    Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

    You hear about people matching their clothing, home interior and cars to their personality, but what about your career? It makes sense to dress in a way that feels suited to your personality, but it makes more sense to choose a career that perfectly fits who you are as a person.

    In fact, more people need to be chasing a career that is a good match for their traits, preferences and motives. Like seriously, where was this information when I was meeting with my university advisors. But, better late than never, as my daughter is now making her career choice at university.

    When you’re choosing your career it’s important to consider all aspects of your personality at the same time. A holistic approach to life is always a good idea.  I’ve always heard the saying, “choose to do something you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Obviously, that’s not true, tbh, you’ll work harder than you ever thought possible ( especially if you’re working for yourself) but you won’t be so miserable because you’ll be doing something you love. That’s the key.

    These choices will keep you happy while working your butt off, and you’ll be more likely to get along with the people on your team because you’re just happy to be there. Whether you’re an introvert looking for a job with independence or an extrovert seeking a chance to be a leader, here are a handful of reasons why your personality is so important when it comes to solidifying your career path.

    You Will Enjoy What You Do

    You deserve to go through life enjoying all aspects of your career and truly loving what you do. It can bring you so much more motivation and joy when you are personally well-suited to your chosen career path. Learning more about Strong-Interest Inventory will give you a better idea of how people match their interests to their career, educational paths and more. After all, doing something that you actually care about and align with can bring you much more happiness in the long run. Now would be the ideal time to delve deeper into your hobbies, favorite subject matters and personal background so that you can uncover a career that is well-suited to you in every sense.

    You Will Fit Into The Workplace

    Feeling part of a community in your workplace is something that will help you to connect with the people around you. If you surround yourself with others who are similar to you, it’s likely that you’ll form strong friendships and successful working relationships with them too. If you’re a loud and outgoing person, it may be likely for you to go into the media or communications industry. However, if you’re a more private person you may prefer a role in accounting or IT. It’s clear to see that there are certain career paths that will be more suited to you than others.

    You Will Experience Much More Success

    If you fit into your chosen industry seamlessly you will instantly have more confidence. When you have confidence in yourself, you are, therefore, much more likely to experience more success along the way. When it comes to finding the perfect career for your personality, it’s important to look beyond the career as a whole and focus on the actual day to day role. If your personality traits are aligned with these tasks, you are much more likely to find success.

    You Will Be More Productive 

    You will naturally be better at a job role that is well suited to your personality. This not only gives you the natural skills to succeed, but it also helps you to be more productive and motivated too. Productivity is key to when you’re hoping to have a thriving career that is full of opportunities. Usually, there is only one reason why a person may be lacking in productivity, and this is because of a dip in their skills or lowered interest in their actual field of work.

    You’ll Discover More About Your Strengths and Weaknesses

    Learning more about yourself will provide you with so many more opportunities when it comes to career progression. Discovering your personal and professional strengths and weaknesses as you navigate your chosen career path will help you to improve in all areas. Knowing what you need to work on can give you a huge step forward in every aspect of your career, and it creates a huge level of self awareness along the way too. Developing a clear action plan will help you to discover the best options for your career so that you can make the next step forward. Any weaknesses that you discover along the way can be enhanced through courses, practicing and coaching. Honing in on any skill and working on any shortfalls is a positive step towards finding a career that is well suited to your personality.

    When you take the time to consider all of your personality traits when you’re looking for a job, you will soon find that your career satisfaction increases and your overall happiness improves too. Hopefully, you have the tools, ideas and inspiration to make the right choice for you and your future career.

  • How Moms Can Celebrate World Sleep Day!

    How Moms Can Celebrate World Sleep Day!

    Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

    Hey there, fellow sleep-deprived mom friend!

    So, it’s that time of year again – World Sleep Day. Did you even know that was a thing? Me, neither. Then again, I’ve been a mom for 19 years, so you know, no rest for the wicked and all that. What is World Sleep Day, you ask? It’s a day dedicated to celebrating the elusive phenomenon known as sleep. But let’s be real, as moms, sleep might feel more like a distant memory than something worth celebrating. Between late-night feedings, toddler tantrums, and endless rounds of “just one more story,” and let’s not forget about waiting for teens to get home and then spending hours chatting about what’s going on with them… getting a decent night’s sleep can seem like a far-fetched dream.

    Disclosure: Some of the products included in this post were gifted for review purposes but all opinions are my own. 

    But fear not, my exhausted, desperately in need of a nap comadre! I’ve got some tips, tricks, and tired laughs to help you make the most of World Sleep Day. So grab your comfiest pajamas and a giant mug of coffee (wine or nightly edible, no judgment here), and let’s dive in!

    1. Embrace the Nap Life

    Whoever said naps are just for babies clearly never met a sleep-deprived mom. Let’s be real, naps are our love language. So, on World Sleep Day, give yourself permission to indulge in a midday siesta. Whether it’s a power nap in your fully-flat reclinable XL6 FlexiSpot Powerlift Recliner with massage and heat or a full-blown snooze fest in bed, take advantage of any opportunity to catch some z’s. Trust me, the laundry can wait – your sanity cannot. Because if you’re going to spend half your life in bed, you might as well do it in style.

    2. Treat Yourself to Some Sleep Accessories

    You know what they say: when in doubt, accessorize. And when it comes to sleep, the right accessories can make all the difference. Treat yourself to some cozy new pajamas, invest in a weighted silk sleep stone eye mask (it’s a game changer) or indulge in a luxurious set of PeachSkin Sheets. Because if you’re going to spend half your life in bed, you might as well do it in style. If you want to sleep in comfort ALL.YEAR.LONG. You must get yourself a muslin comfort 365 blanket. It keeps me comfortable no matter what time of the year it is and that is a life changing thing when you are pregnant, perimenopausal, menopausal or a woman in general. It was the one thing I never knew I needed but once I got one, I’m never going back. 

    Bonus to sleep like a baby: Add a scrumptious and relaxing pillow mist.

    3. Create a Sleep Sanctuary

    Turn your bedroom into a sleep sanctuary fit for a queen (or, you know, a tired mom). Dim the lights, set the mood with some soothing essential oils like Alevan Botanica: The Sleep Set , and banish any electronic devices from the premises (yes, even your phone). Creating a calming environment can help signal to your brain that it’s time to unwind and drift off into dreamland. 

    Also, a must have for any sleep sanctuary, is Evercool®+ Cooling Sheet Set  and comforter. They’re made with the same game-changing temperature regulating technology and quality, moisture-wicking fabric as the the  Rest Kids Evercool™ Cooling Comforter I’d been using to cool off on hot nights. Only these full-sized sheets and comforter allows hopelessly hormonally challenged hot moms ( and dads) to recharge through a comfortable, cool, dry and restful sleep. Just imagine your body temperature being regulated and you being able to sleep through the night? Now, if the kids would just sleep through the night too.

    4. Practice the Art of Saying No

    As moms, we have a tendency to take on more than we can handle. But here’s the thing – you can’t pour from an empty cup (or in this case, a tired mom). So, on World Sleep Day (and every day thereafter), practice the fine art of saying no. You don’t have to sacrifice your every waking moment and martyr yourself in the name of motherhood. Whether it’s turning down that last-minute playdate or passing on that committee meeting, prioritize your sleep and sanity above all else.

    5. Find the Humor in Sleep Deprivation

    Let’s face it, sometimes all you can do is laugh. Whether it’s finding yourself wearing your shirt inside out for the third day in a row or accidentally putting the milk in the pantry instead of the fridge (guilty), finding the humor in sleep deprivation can make the endless nights feel a little less daunting. So go ahead, embrace the chaos, and laugh until you cry (or until you fall asleep standing up, whichever comes first).

    6. Seek Support

    Remember, you’re not alone in this sleep-deprived journey. Reach out to your fellow mom friends for support, commiseration, and maybe even a much-needed venting session. Sometimes all it takes is knowing that someone else is in the same boat to make the sleepless nights feel a little more bearable.

    7. Treat Yourself to Some Self-Care

    And last but certainly not least, don’t forget to prioritize self-care. Whether it’s treating yourself to a bubble bath, indulging in your favorite guilty pleasure TV show, or simply taking a few moments to breathe deeply and center yourself, make self-care a non-negotiable part of your daily routine. Because a well-rested mom is a happy mom, and a happy mom is a force to be reckoned with.

    Secret bedtime self-care weapon: Therabody SmartGoggles. They not only reduce stress and anxiety, they support restful sleep,  soothe headaches, relieve eye strain, lower your heart rate, increase circulation and ease facial tension.

    Share Your Sleep Stories and Tips

    Phew, we made it through! Now, here’s where you come in. I want to hear from you! Comment below and share your best sleep deprivation story or your top tip for getting some much-needed and deserved mom sleep this World Sleep Day. Let’s laugh, commiserate, and support each other through the sleepless nights. Together, we’ve got this!

  • How to Optimize Your Weight Loss Journey with Mounjaro

    How to Optimize Your Weight Loss Journey with Mounjaro

     

    Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

    It’s week 8 for me on Mounjaro and, I know that I am not alone. Some of you have also embarked on this incredible journey to lose weight while taking Mounjaro too. First off, I want to give you a big virtual high-five for taking charge of your health like a boss! Seriously, it’s no small feat, and I’m here to cheer you on every step of the way. People think its the “cheater” way to lose weight but it’s not. Let’s think about it, being obese is a health issue in and of itself. If you’re obese and you’ve decided to try medicine to get healthy, I don’t see what the issue is. Just please make sure that you do it under the supervision of a doctor. Mounjaro is a serious drug with serious side effects.

    As you all know, I am on week 8. Just took my 8th shot this morning. I am still at a very low dose but it is doing what its supposed to do for me…lower my glucose numbers, get that A1C down and begin the process of helping me get to where I need to be physically because perimenopause and stress were making it impossible. I’m not taking it JUST for weight lose but my doctor and I are hoping that’s one of my side effects.

    Let me be really real with you right now, it is not easy and not everyone is going to start dropping weight, and it is not without risks. As of today, after 7 weeks on Mounjaro, I have still only lost 13 lbs. However, that’s not the whole story. Like I said, my numbers are freaking awesome and I feel great.

    Speaking of feeling great, with diabetes comes inflammation, well, with my numbers being in the healthy range…this girl is walking up and down stairs without limping. I’m rocking more size 14’s these days than 16s and my clothes are all fitting better. Most importantly, I am feeling better in my own skin, which as you all know has never been easy for this recovering anorexic.

    Not all wins are seen on the scale, remember that. Also, slow and steady is sometimes the only way you can finish the race. All that being said, I want to optimize my efforts to getting healthy. I can’t expect Mounjaro to do all the heavy lifting on my happy and healthy era, get fit girl era.

    Now, let’s get real about how to make the most of this journey. I know it can feel overwhelming at times, but trust me, you’ve got this. We’re in it together, and I’ve got some insider tips to help you optimize your weight loss with Mounjaro. I did the research so you didn’t have to and I am putting in the work, I’ll keep you posted.

    How Do I Maximize My Weight Loss in Mounjaro?

    Okay, let’s talk strategy. Maximizing your weight loss with Mounjaro is all about finding that sweet spot between healthy eating, staying active, and staying on top of your medication game. It’s like a three-legged stool – you need all parts working together to keep you steady and strong.

    Start by taking a good look at your diet. Focus on filling your plate with whole, nutrient-dense foods that nourish your body from the inside out. Think colorful veggies, lean proteins, whole grains, and healthy fats. And hey, if you need some inspiration, check out this awesome article for some tasty Mounjaro-friendly meal ideas.

    How Long Does It Take to Lose 25 lbs on Mounjaro?

    Ah, the million-dollar question! Look, I wish I had a crystal ball to give you a definite answer, but the truth is, it varies from person to person. Your journey is uniquely yours, and there’s no one-size-fits-all timeline. Some folks might drop those 25 pounds like it’s nobody’s business, while others might take a bit longer. And you know what? That’s totally okay. Progress is progress, no matter how slow or steady.

    Why Am I Not Losing Weight on Mounjaro?

    Ugh, hitting a weight loss plateau can be so frustrating, am I right? Especially, if like me, you started off slow. But before you start throwing your hands up in defeat, let’s troubleshoot a bit. There could be a bunch of reasons why the scale isn’t budging – maybe you’re not as active as you could be ( I know I haven’t been in this drunk weather), or perhaps you’ve been a bit lax with your meal planning ( guilty again… often I forget to eat). Or hey, it could be something totally out of left field, like stress ( check) or lack of sleep ( check check) messing with your metabolism. Bottom line? Don’t sweat it. We’ll figure it out together.

    How Many Calories Should I Eat on Mounjaro?

    Ah, the age-old calorie conundrum. Here’s the thing – I’m not a big fan of counting every single calorie that passes my lips, and I’m guessing you aren’t either. Instead of getting bogged down in the numbers game, focus on eating mindfully and listening to your body’s hunger and fullness cues. And hey, if you want some extra guidance, chatting with a registered dietitian can be super helpful in crafting a meal plan that’s tailored just for you.

    Additional Resources for Your Mounjaro Journey

    Oh, before I forget, I stumbled upon some pretty awesome resources that I think you’ll dig:

    Remember, friend, this journey is all about progress, not perfection. Take it one day at a time, celebrate the small victories, and don’t forget to be kind to yourself along the way. You’re doing amazing, and I’m so proud of you!

  • Dear Daughter, As You Blow Out 19 Candles

    Dear Daughter, As You Blow Out 19 Candles

    Dear daughter,

    Life is precious, and not a single day goes by that I don’t thank God and the universe for the gift of being your mom. Simply having you in my orbit would be more than enough, but getting to love you is the most precious gift I’ve ever received in my life.

    This may be the hardest birthday yet because I know that next year, when you turn 20, I won’t get to walk into your bedroom, give you a big birthday hug, and wake you with cuddles and “Mañanitas” playing. There will be no birthday waffles and Starbucks run, no stress-relieving trip to play with puppies, and no “Bella Day” like we’ve had for the past 19 years. Next year, you’ll be on campus, and I’ll be here. Everything will be different.

    Will you be available at 4:51 p.m. for your birth minute kiss? I’ll be driving to your college campus, but maybe you’ll be in class, with friends, or too busy. Life gets in the way, and distance changes perspectives. The shift that’s coming is inevitable and natural – it’s how you fully become you. Unfortunately, it also means we both have to learn where I end and you begin.

    You’ll always be my favorite person in the entire world, and I’ll always love you beyond measure. But someday soon, I’ll be one of many blessed souls who get the privilege of loving you. It’s okay, though, because this separation is how life is designed so we both survive the impending physical distance and the big, beautiful life ahead of you.

    Mom’s Advice as You Leave for College

    I think we’ve both been feeling the gentle tug of separation on the dotted line over the past year. Don’t be sad. I got an extra year with you at home, and every day with you in my orbit has been precious. I’ll be forever grateful for it.

    This week, your first week of being 19, I feel the pull a little harder as we await your transfer acceptance letter to your dream school. I’m so damn proud and happy for you, but I’m also sorrowful for myself. Letting go has never been something I’ve been good at. But dear God, I’m thankful that I’ve gotten to love you so hard for these 19 years.

    I’ve watched you grow and blossom from a silly, sweet, imaginative, kind, and happy child into a smart, beautiful, funny, thoughtful, authentic, caring, and generous woman. You keep your circle small but tight. You love unconditionally and fully, yet you’re discerning about who you give your time and love to. You are wise beyond your years and stronger than you realize. You are absolutely amazing, and nothing can stop you.

    Fly high, and never stop fighting for what you believe in, your dreams, those you love, and, most importantly, never give up on yourself.

    19 will be a year of growth and change for both of us. I can’t wait to see you continue to blossom into the woman you’re meant to be. As your mom, it’s time to give you space to do that. Just know that no matter where you go, who you become, or where life takes you, I’ll always be here cheering you on, supporting you, and yes, still fighting for you. You are the best of me, and there will ever only be one “Bella BooBoo Kitty” in this lifetime for me.

    Never doubt that when life gets hard, you’ve got a soft place to land. No matter where I am or what I’m doing, my home is your home, and you will always have a place here with us. When you feel life is getting too heavy, put the burden on me. I’ll carry it until you recoup your strength. Remember, you are loved literally beyond measure, and no space, time, distance, or circumstances can ever change that.

    So be brave, go out into the world, and build the life you’ve dreamed of. You deserve all the happiness you want. You’ve got this.

    19 is just a number, but it’s also the year you begin the biggest adventure of your life. I wish you every one of God’s blessings and a lifetime filled with big, heart-fluttering, reciprocated love; booming, from-the-bottom-of-your-soul laughter; unbridled, can’t-stop-smiling happiness; great health and adventure chasing; and heart-fulfilling dreams. But most of all, I ask you to love yourself. Love and care for yourself the way I love and care for you, like you are my favorite and most precious person in this world, because you are. Never forget that.

    Love you forever, to the moon and back!

     

  • Teen Takeover! Planning a Trip Your Teens Won’t Whine About

    Teen Takeover! Planning a Trip Your Teens Won’t Whine About

    Estimated reading time: 6 minutes

    Hey Mamas (and Papas!), remember those pre-teen years when vacations meant building sandcastles and begging for ice cream? Those glorious spring breaks where everyone went with the flow? Sure, you had to carry an ass ton of extras to keep them entertained but in the end, it was absolutely worth it. Yeah, those days are officially over. Now, we’re facing a new foe: the dreaded planning a trip your teens won’t whine about and you might actually enjoy. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE traveling with my teens (it’s my favorite thing to do) but life would be easier without the “cool, bruh.” 

    The mere mention of a family trip can be met with eye rolls, dramatic sighs, and monosyllabic responses.  Don’t worry, you’re not alone. It happens to the best of us. My girls even refer to me as “cool” on occasion and I get all the eye rolls. Planning a trip that appeals to both your inner wanderlust and your teen’s ever-evolving interests can feel like navigating a minefield. But fear not, fellow travelers!  This mama is here to equip you with secret weapons to conquer the Teen Travel Whine and plan a trip EVERYONE will love. Yes, even that youngest, most entitled and champion “cool, bruh” one. 

    Embrace the Collaboration (Without Losing Control)

    First things first, ditch the “Surprise! We’re going to Disney!” tactic. Just kidding. Maybe for typical teens but my girls are die-hard Disney teens. We go every year and every year it’s.the.best.time.ever! Teens crave a sense of ownership, so ditch the dictator routine and turn trip planning into a collaborative mission. Dust off that dusty world map (or whip out your phone) and gather your little squad. Get their travel vibes flowing by browsing travel blogs, Instagram accounts, and travel magazines together.

    Pro Tip: Let them dream big! Even if a trip to the Maldives is out of budget, exploring their wildest travel desires can spark inspiration for more realistic options.

    Location, Location, Location:

    Now, the fun part! Once you have a general idea of what kind of trip your teen is digging (beach bumming, city exploration, adventure junkie, etc.), start brainstorming destinations that cater to both your interests. Here are some Teen-Approved Hotspots:

    • Adventure Awaits! For the thrill-seekers, consider national parks like Yosemite or Yellowstone, where hiking, camping, and white-water rafting will have them screaming with excitement (in a good way!). If international travel is on the agenda, Costa Rica offers a perfect blend of adventure and relaxation. Ziplining through rainforests, horseback riding on volcanic beaches, and learning to surf – enough adrenaline to keep those teenage spirits soaring.
    • City Slickers Unite! Let your teen unleash their inner urban explorer in a vibrant city like New Orleans, overflowing with live music, historic sites, and mouthwatering food (beignets, anyone?). London, with its iconic landmarks, museums galore, and a thriving theater scene, is another fantastic option. Explore hidden alleyways, catch a West End show, and maybe even take a day trip to explore the magic of Harry Potter Studios.
    • Beach Bums Welcome! Who doesn’t love a relaxing beach getaway? But ditch the all-inclusive resorts and opt for a location with some personality. Tulum, Mexico, offers stunning beaches, ancient Mayan ruins to explore, and a bohemian vibe your teen will love. The Outer Banks in North Carolina boasts beautiful beaches, charming towns, and even wild horses to keep everyone entertained.

    Activities: It’s All About the Experiences

    Okay, you’ve nailed the destination. Now, let’s make sure there’s enough action to keep everyone from getting bored (especially those with short attention spans cough teenagers cough).

    Pro Tip:  Remember, vacations are about creating lasting memories, so prioritize experiences over souvenirs.

    Here are some ideas to keep your teens engaged:

    • Food Tours: Turn mealtimes into mini-adventures with a food tour that explores the local cuisine. From chowing down on tacos in Mexico City to sampling dim sum in Hong Kong, these tours offer a delicious way to experience a new culture.
    • Get Creative: Does your teen have an artistic soul? Seek out workshops or classes that allow them to learn a new skill like pottery making, glass blowing, or graffiti art. This is a fantastic way to create a unique souvenir and a fun memory.
    • Volunteer for a Cause: Looking for a way to give back on your trip? Look into volunteer opportunities with local organizations. This could be anything from helping to build a school in a developing country to working at an animal shelter. Not only is it a rewarding experience, but it allows your teen to connect with the local community on a deeper level.

    Don’t Forget the “Me Time” Factor

    Remember, a vacation is supposed to be relaxing and enjoyable for EVERYONE, including yourself!

    Pro Tip: Factor in “me-time” for everyone. Let your teens explore their own interests for a few hours, whether it’s browsing vintage shops or catching a movie. You can head to a museum, get a massage, or simply relax on a beach lounger with a good book.

    This isn’t about abandoning your teens on a deserted island (tempting as it may sound sometimes!), but rather creating opportunities for everyone to recharge and pursue their individual interests.

    Here are some ideas to create that “me-time” magic:

    • Teen Time: Negotiate a few hours where your teens can explore the city (or beach, or wherever you are) on their own. This could involve browsing vintage shops, catching a local band’s gig, or simply hanging out with friends they may have made on the trip.
    • Adult Adventures: Schedule an activity just for you! Whether it’s a solo museum visit, a relaxing spa treatment, or enjoying a quiet coffee at a local cafe, this dedicated “me-time” allows you to unwind and recharge.

    Embrace the Unexpected

    Travel is all about creating memories, and sometimes the best ones are the ones you don’t plan. Leave some room for spontaneity on your trip!

    Here are some ways to embrace the unexpected:

    • Get Lost (Safely): Instead of sticking rigidly to your itinerary, allow some time to wander and explore. You might stumble upon a hidden gem of a restaurant, a charming local market, or a quirky street performance – these unexpected finds can become the highlights of your trip.
    • Be Open to New Experiences: Don’t shy away from trying something new, even if it’s outside your comfort zone. Whether it’s trying a local dish you can’t pronounce, taking a salsa dancing lesson, or going on a spontaneous hike, embracing new experiences can create lasting memories and stories to tell for years to come.
    • Go with the Flow: Things don’t always go according to plan, especially when traveling. Flights might get delayed, museums might be closed, or the weather might not cooperate. Instead of getting stressed, take a deep breath and roll with the punches. These unexpected hiccups can actually lead to some hilarious stories down the road.
    • The Loss Of Items: It can be tough if you lose things when you’re on your trip. Nobody likes it but it happens nonetheless. Instead of getting stressed out and panicked about it, remember that there’s always a solution. Where there’s a will, there is always a way. If you lose your phone, look for it, track it, see where it is. If you’re like me ( ADHD brain) backtrack and you will find it, even if it take a while. If you lose your travel money card, see if someone back home can do a money transfer to Mexico or wherever you are until you get back. There are always solutions, try not to panic.

    **Remember, Mamas (and Papas, too), a successful family vacation isn’t about achieving Instagram-perfect moments. It’s about creating shared experiences, fostering connection, and making memories that will last a lifetime.  So ditch the stress, embrace the chaos, and get ready to have the best family vacation ever!

    Bonus Tip:  Don’t forget to document your adventures! Encourage your teens to take photos, capture videos, and jot down their thoughts in a travel journal.  These little mementos will be precious treasures you can all look back on and reminisce about long after the tan lines fade.

    Now, go forth and plan that epic trip your whole family (even the teens!) will be raving about!**

  • My (Mostly) Hilarious Journey with Mounjaro and Type 2 Diabetes

    My (Mostly) Hilarious Journey with Mounjaro and Type 2 Diabetes

    Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

    Okay, so picture this: me, the queen of sass and self-deprecating humor, staring down the barrel of a diagnosis. Not just any diagnosis, mind you, but type 2 diabetes. Thanks, perimenopause, for the lovely parting gift. As if it weren’t enough to rob me of my fertility, now, you want to slap me in the proverbial face and call me ugly too? That’s when I found Mounjaro.

    Let’s face it, sugar dragons are pesky. One minute you’re happily cruising along reversing the heck out of your diabetes, then bam! Blood sugar spikes, energy dips, and your inner sass monster starts grumbling. That’s what happened to me, thanks to the lovely combo of perimenopause, stress and type 2 diabetes. My A1C was doing a bad imitation of a roller coaster, and my glucose numbers danced the flamenco with a sugarplum fairy. It was glucose level insanity.

    My (Mostly) Hilarious Journey with Mounjaro and Type 2 DiabetesEnter Mounjaro, the knight in shining (injectable) armor.

    Now, I’m not one to shy away from a challenge, especially if it involves witty banter and slightly questionable life choices. But let’s be real, diabetes is no joke. My A1C just kept creeping up on me like some weird guy at the club who couldn’t take the hint.

    Now, hold on just one minute, fitness unicorns, I’m one of you. Don’t come for me.  I’m not advocating for quick fixes or magic weight-loss potions. You know I don’t. If I did, I’d still be rocking that thigh gap instead of my current status of chub rub expert level. I battled anorexia for a decade, and trust me, there’s no sugarcoating the fact that sustainable health requires hard work and self-love. But when it comes to managing my diabetes and reclaiming my energy, sometimes a little help from modern-day glucose reducing magic (okay, medication) is a good thing.

    Mounjaro is steadily lowering my glucose numbers and reversing my type 2 diabetes.

    Now, before you get all “Ozempic is the new black” on me, hear me out. I’m not advocating for quick fixes. In fact, I’m firmly against them, and rejected the idea of a glp-1 for over a year. But when it comes to managing my diabetes and getting my health back on track, I’ll do whatever needs to be done. Numbers don’t lie and sometimes, you have to try a different route to get to your destination.

    So, I finally said yes and embarked on this Mounjaro adventure, armed with my trusty dose of skepticism, crossed arms and a notes app full of witty observations.

    Here’s the lowdown, sugar dragons:

    In just 4 weeks, I’ve bid farewell to 12 pounds of unwanted baggage, paving the way to a healthier, happier version of myself. Sayonara, extra weight! With a starting point of 235.5 pounds, I’ve already crossed the 5% milestone, now eyeing that glorious 10% mark hovering tantalizingly at 211.5 pounds. And you know what? I’m not just shedding pounds; I’m reclaiming control over my A1C levels, determined to smash through that pesky 7.6 and bring it back under 5. Talk about goals, right?

    From the moment I first injected Mounjaro, I felt things changing. Energy levels soaring, glucose numbers steadying, inflammation dwindling – the perks just kept on coming! And let’s not forget the shrinking waistline, bidding farewell to inches like it’s nobody’s business. Who knew losing weight could be such a wild ride?

    But it isn’t all sunshine and unicorns. Mounjaro isn’t without its side effects. A little too heavy on the snacks? Cue the stomach rebellion, complete with a symphony of gas, burps, and constipation. Talk about a party pooper or party not pooper, as it were in my unfortunate case! Lesson learned: steer clear of high-fat foods and keep the fiber flowing.

    My (Mostly) Hilarious Journey with Mounjaro and Type 2 DiabetesThe Good, the Bad, and the Gassy:

    The Good:

    • Blood Sugar Tango? More Like a Waltz: My glucose levels have become a model citizen, rarely venturing above 150, and that post-meal spike? Gone like yesterday’s news. Hallelujah!
    • Energy Unleashed (with a Cautionary Label): Say goodbye to the afternoon slump! Mounjaro has me bouncing like a Tigger on espresso, but beware, fellow bipolar warriors, this energy boost can flirt with the manic side. Tread carefully, my friends.
    • Bye-Bye, Bulge: Let’s not sugarcoat it (pun intended), I’ve shed some pounds. Not a magic disappearing act, mind you, but a steady, healthy 12 lbs in 4 weeks. My clothes are thanking me, and so is my self-confidence. But it isn’t all the Mounjaro, I’m doing my part too; controlling portions, making healthier choices and moving at least 30 minutes 5 days a week.
    • Inflammation? Who’s That?: My dodgy knee, a souvenir from the “Great Break of 2015,” feels less like a rusty hinge and more like a well-oiled machine. Stairs, who dis?

    The Bad:

    • Tummy Troubles: Turns out, high-fat foods and Mounjaro don’t mix well, at least in my experience. Bacon and I are currently on a temporary break (thanks, belching and constipation!). My body is clearly sending a message: “Lay off the grease, Deborah!”
    • The Great Vomiting Debacle: Now, about that dosage bump to 5 – let’s just say, it was a night to remember. A little too indulgent on the snacking front led to a gut rebellion of epic proportions. Picture this: stomach distended, burping, indigestion and praying for divine intervention. And just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse – bam! Oh, the horror!   Cue the projectile vomiting extravaganza. A cautionary tale, indeed. After upping my dosage and snacking a little too heavily, I experienced a night of projectile vomiting that would make Linda Blair blush. Lesson learned: stick to the lower dose and befriend fiber and water.

    The Gassy: Well, let’s just say I’ve become intimately acquainted with the power of Simethicone. I’ve never been one to be gassy or burpy and I don’t want to be now so I’m doing whatever I need to keep that side effect at bay.

    My (Mostly) Hilarious Journey with Mounjaro and Type 2 DiabetesThe Verdict:

    Mounjaro is not perfect (not even close), but for me, it’s been a slow and steady game-changer. My diabetes is under control, my energy is up, and I’m feeling like my old, sassy self again. But remember, I’m not a doctor, and this is just my experience. Talk to your healthcare professional before embarking on any new medication, diabetes warrior.

    Listen up, sugar dragons! Take control of your health. Get informed, talk to your doctor, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Remember, small changes can make a big difference. And hey, if you’re on Mounjaro too, let’s commiserate over the gas and share some low-fat recipe tips!

    Bonus Tip: Start small! Instead of reaching for that extra cookie, take a walk around the block. It’s all about progress, not perfection. Now, excuse me while I go hug my pancreas and thank it for cooperating (mostly).

    If you have any questions about my journey on Mounjaro please feel free to ask me in the comments. Or if you want to share your experience with me, I’d love to hear all about it. 

  • Talking to Your Teen about a Toxic Friend/Partner

    Talking to Your Teen about a Toxic Friend/Partner

    Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

    Welp, it finally happened. The girls have finally “dated” partners that gave me the “ick”. No, it wasn’t anything personal, or even that I could put my finger on. What it was… my mom intuition. We all have it but I’m a bit of a natural bruja and when my mommy senses start tingling, I can’t ignore it.  But how do you talk to your teen when you notice red flags in their partner or bestie? You won’t always love your teens partner but try talking to your teen like an adult instead of at them. 

    The girls and I have always had very open, honest, close and transparent relationship and there’s nothing off limits, but I make it a practice not to bash their friends and partners. My girls consider me a friend so I don’t want to switch gears and go all dictator on them. It’s their choice but I’m their mom so I can’t ignore obvious red flags that they may be blind to due to inexperience, the love bubble or an onslaught of love bombing.

    Fellow parents in the trenches of parenthood, are you ready to tackle a conversation that can feel trickier than parallel parking after a tequila tasting? I’m referring to talking to your teen about a friend or partner who raises your red flags.

    Let’s face it, our teens are navigating the social jungle, and sometimes, they pick up companions who make us want to grab a metaphorical hairbrush and untangle the mess. But before you launch into a full-on “they’re-not-good-enough-for-you” tirade (trust me, been there, done that, resulted in slammed doors and epic eye rolls), let’s pause, take a deep breath, and approach this with the finesse of a seasoned diplomat.

    Why the Worries? Buckle Up, Buttercup, Here Comes the Truth:

    As parents, we have this built-in radar that goes off when something feels off with our kids. Maybe it’s the way their “friend” manipulates them, constantly needs rescuing, or leaves them feeling drained and down. Or perhaps it’s the partner who exhibits controlling behavior, puts them down, or makes them question their worth. Whatever the reason, our mama and papa bear instincts kick in, and we want to shield our precious offspring from harm.

    The Tightrope Walk: Navigating the Conversation Minefield:

    Here’s the thing: direct attacks rarely work. Calling someone names or forbidding the relationship altogether might push your teen further away and make them even more defensive. Instead, we need to be strategic ninjas, wielding the power of communication and empathy.

    Step 1: Become a Listening Ear, Not a Judgmental Judge:

    First, create a safe space for your teen to talk. Let them know you’re concerned, but avoid accusatory language. Phrases like “I’ve noticed you seem different lately” or “I’m curious about this friendship/relationship” can open the door to honest conversation.

    Step 2: Ask Open-Ended Questions, Not Leading Ones:

    Instead of planting seeds of doubt with questions like “Do you think they’re a good influence?”, encourage critical thinking with prompts like “How does this relationship make you feel?” or “What are your concerns about this person?”

    Step 3: Validate Their Feelings, Even the Ones You Disagree With:

    Remember, your teen is experiencing this relationship firsthand. Even if you don’t like the person, acknowledge their feelings by saying things like “It sounds like you care about them” or “I understand why this is challenging.”

    Step 4: Share Your Observations (But Gently):

    Once you’ve established a safe space, you can cautiously share your concerns. Focus on specific behaviors, not personal attacks. For example, instead of saying “They’re manipulative,” you could say “I’ve noticed they tend to guilt you into doing things you don’t want to do.”

    Step 5: Empower Them, Don’t Dictate:

    Ultimately, the decision is up to your teen. You can offer guidance and support, but avoid ultimatums or threats. Encourage them to trust their gut, set healthy boundaries, and know that you’re there for them no matter what.

    Remember: This may not be a one-time conversation. Be patient, supportive, and offer a listening ear whenever they need it.

    Bonus Tip: Lead by example! Build healthy relationships in your own life and model the kind of love and respect you want your teen to experience.

    The Takeaway:

    Talking to your teen about a questionable friend or partner can be tricky, but it’s an important conversation to have. By approaching it with empathy, open communication, and a focus on healthy relationships, you can empower your teen to make wise choices and navigate the complexities of their social world. Honestly, the relationship I have with my girls is the most important thing ever so I will do whatever it takes to keep them safe and happy but, at the same time, our relationship is one built on trust, respect and unconditional love so I have to keep it real with them. Also, you are not always going to love who your ten choses to spend their time with or invest their love into but when you see them headed for danger, you should try to talk to them in a way that respects them as young adults. 

    Now, onto you, fellow warriors! What are your tips for communicating with your teens about tough topics? Share your experiences and advice in the comments below!

    P.S. Remember, taking care of yourself is crucial when navigating the sometimes-turbulent waters of parenthood. So, do something small for yourself today – take a walk, read a book, or indulge in your favorite dessert. You deserve it