Father and his Daughter~ It’s difficult to understand the relationship between a father and his daughter. This topic has been on my mind a lot lately with the Daddy/Daughter dance pending this Friday. The Big Guy is an amazing father. You can see it in his eyes how much he adores our girls. This adoration appeared the moment each of our girl’s were born, engulfing father and daughter in an unbreakable circle of love and trust. It will be this way as long as he takes breath. There exists a next level of unconditional love between a father and his daughters. It’s a symbiotic relationship of complete devotion.
I see my girls with the Big Guy and I see all the possibility and goodness of a parent/child relationship and it makes me wonder if every child has this, at some point? I adore my father. I’ve always loved him. His approval and love have always been at the forefront of my mind. But I remember moments, in my lifetime, when I didn’t like him very much. Times when my happiness literally was hung on him and he let me down. Not in the small ways that a parent fails their child but failure in grand ways. I’ve always loved him the most. I’ve always found forgiveness and an endless well of love for this man. He’s always loved me. I know that. He just didn’t always show it.
I watch my daughters, they hang their happiness on their father. Of course, my husband is a different man than my father. It’s a different time than when I was a child. Fathers are more involved in the parenting than they ever were. My husband is ever dependable and present. My father was not always dependable and seldom present. He worked a lot and when he was not working, he spent a lot of time doing what he wanted to do.
He loved me unconditionally but sometimes he had a difficult time expressing it. I spent a lot of time being made to feel like his little princess and a little time feeling like I had done something wrong. Only no one ever told me what that was. It was confusing as a child. It was sort of like having the rug pulled out from underneath you and the wind knocked out of you, unexpectedly.
I don’t know if that is genetic or I’ve somehow inadvertently taught my girls to do this. I think mostly they do it because they know he will never fail to make them happy. Even when he doesn’t do what they want, or give them what they want it is always with unconditional love and support and usually in their best interest. They can see in his eyes, hear in his words and know in his actions that they are the most important people in his world. I love that about him.
What differences do you see between your relationship with your father and the relationship your husband has with your children? Do you think this is because of the role of men in parenting today ? Or do you think it has more to do with who your husband is versus who your father was?