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Mommy Truisms

motherhood, #promisetobaby, johnson and johnson

I’ve been thinking about the beauty of motherhood a lot lately, in every way. It’s been a life changing couple of years. When I started this blog, I was in the thick of motherhood. I couldn’t see the beauty of it at all.

Sure, I saw the miracle in birth and felt the all consuming love that filled my heart with a smile from my daughters but I was right in the middle of it; too exhausted, too overwhelmed to stop and enjoy the little moments. I was too busy just trying to survive and truly believed that motherhood was misery peppered with moments of profound bliss but now I know better. Motherhood gives me so much more than I can ever give them. We give them life but they give us purpose.

The true beauty of motherhood is in the unexpected.

We just welcomed our newborn niece into the world and I’ve had babies on the brain. You know how that works? Ovaries start twitching and your uterus is all whispering, ” if you like it than you should put a baby in it!” Sneaky, baby loving uterus.

Babies are amazing and they smell like apples and pure love and you just want to eat them up and thank God because they leave you so freaking exhausted that you can’t see straight and you just want to cry. If only you had a free moment to do so.

birth, beauty of motherhood, motherhood, newborns, parenting

The beauty of motherhood is that it is always changing.

My daughters are now 6 and 8-years-old and I have to say, I really like them; as people. They are kind, funny, smart, full of personality and wit and I am so proud to have even a very small part to do with that. I’ve made it a point over the past year to try and step back, breathe and be in the moment.

I spent so many years going through the motions; doing what I thought was expected of a “good” mom but it was more like a checklist than enjoying and embracing the beauty of motherhood. It was one more thing that I had to get done to get to the next moment. But what was I rushing towards? The letting go? Tomorrow is not guaranteed.

I know it’s easier said than done but every moment we have with our children may not be magical, but each and every one is a miracle.  One day, I realized it doesn’t matter how perfect the birthday parties are or whether or not they have all the coolest clothes and toys, luxurious vacations and a big house in a fancy neighborhood. None of it matters because at the end of the day, all kids really care about or remember is that you loved them and the time you spent with them.

birth, beauty of motherhood, motherhood, newborns, parenting

The real beauty of motherhood lies within the mistakes and do overs.

I know that my girls are my two favorite people in the world and no matter what sleep I’ve lost, nights out I’ve sacrificed, money or my body that I have lost, it’s all worth it to be loved and have the privilege of loving my little girls. No amount of money, sleep or fun will ever be able to replace the early morning hugs and silly giggles that only a child of your own can bring.

Motherhood changes everything. Motherhood is hard. Motherhood is the realization that you can love deeper and truer than you ever thought possible and then just as quickly realizing that the thing you love most in the world, is walking around free in the world. Your heart is on the loose and you know that any hurt or damage they endure, will be multiplied by infinity in your own heart.

birth, beauty of motherhood, motherhood, newborns, parenting

The beauty of motherhood is the simple gift of loving and being loved so unconditionally that nothing else matters.

Motherhood is glorious in ways that I never knew possible and painful in ways that I never imagined. Motherhood is messy and wonderful. From the moment you know they exist, they will change your life forever. It’s harder than anything you’ve ever done or will ever do because it’s more important than anything else you will ever do.

But we do it willingly because the reward always outweighs the sacrifice and that’s the real truth about motherhood that no one ever tells you. The beauty of motherhood is that it’s blindingly beautiful at times and at other times it takes the breath right out of you.

Your heart won’t know what hit it. Enjoy it. Every single minute of it because it flies by and before you know it, the precious baby who you were wishing to crawl is out the door, dating and driving and all you can do is hold on for dear life as you are forced to let go.

birth, beauty of motherhood, motherhood, newborns, parenting

Beautiful, sweet Delaney, welcome to the world and Kate & Jeff, welcome to this wonderful, crazy club we call parenthood. It’s the best and hardest thing you will ever do and it is worth every single second of sleep lost and tear shed. XOXO

That is the real, true beauty of motherhood.

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shit my kids say, things kids say, kids

crazy shit my kids say, the things my kids sayThe shit my kids say no longer shocks me, though it probably should.Since becoming a mother, I have said and heard a lot of crazy stuff come out of little mouths. Things that I never thought I’d hear before, never mind say..out loud! Seriously, I do a lot of double takes in my house because I can seldom believe the shit that comes out of my kids’ mouths. It is incredible and the older they get the more preposterously outrageous the things out of their mouths and my responses become.

My girls say some of craziest things, here are a few gems I’ve heard in their lifetime.

Out shopping for a smaller size shorts for myself during shark week, never a good idea by the way, my daughters commentary had me doubling over in laughter, nearly popping the buttons off the new shorts. As I was trying on pairs 2 sizes smaller than last summers, I was leery whether or not they were going to fit. They fit but dependent on the style some were snugger than others. So as I stand there flustered by my water retention, I hear Bella say, from the corner of the dressing room, “Good luck with that!”

Me: “Good luck with what?”

Bella: “Good luck getting those suckers to button!”

It’s like she’s like my conscience walking around taunting me. I laughed so hard, there was no way I was getting those suckers buttoned.

Once during a 5 minute nap warning, the girls were being particularly thorough with their ignoring of my voice. I repeat for the 5th time,

“5 minutes til we go in for naps!”

My then 5-year-old looks directly at me and very seriously says, ” Mom, just because I am talking to Gabs and not looking at you, I CAN still hear you….I have a super power!”

Me: “Oh , yeah. What would that be? (besides the obvious power to completely ignore the sound of my voice)”

Bella: “I’m a SUPER LISTENER! I hear everything!” OK, that’s news to me because she may hear me but she certainly does not always listen.

Once at a crowded family dinner, in which we were discussing the topic of my husband and I going on a much needed date night, my then 5-year-old interjected ( in her loudest possible voice),

” Mommy, you should go out with Daddy. Have fun! Stay out as late as you want. But NOT TOO much fun or you’ll come back with another baby!”

Thanks a lot for the warning. I’m sure your Grandparents loved the information, as well.

If you think the things that come out of their mouths are crazy, you should hear the things that have been coming out of my mouth in the past few years.

“Stop chewing on the dog!”

“PLEASE Stop eating the dog food!

“Who’s hair is this is the wastebasket?”

“Stand still so I can get this poop out of your hair!”

“Stop screaming or the police will come and take you away.”

“Get back in bed and I will spray Lemur spray under your bed!” ( Lemur Spray Kills Imaginary Lemur’s Dead!)

Don’t inhale that pearl!”

“Stop putting your butt in your sister’s face!”

What’s the craziest thing you have heard yourself say since having kids? Better yet, what is the craziest thing you’ve heard come out of your kid’s mouth?

 

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Truthful Mommy Tells All~My TRUTHs about Motherhood

 

Today is the last day of my month long celebration of my 2nd Blog anniversary ( And MY 600th post in 2 years) and I wanted to share Truthful Mommy Tells All~ My TRUTH about Motherhood. I also want to thank all of my fabulously talented and honest friends who shared their truth with my readers. You are my village and you all help me through this journey of motherhood with our conversations. I hope that sharing my TRUTH over these past two years has been a source of comfort and commiseration for you to know that you are not alone in this roller coaster of uncertainty that we call parenting.  My truth is  something that I have been learning slowly over the past 6 years and even more so since I have joined the blogging community. I don’t think I can contain it all in a single post but I will share some of it here. Again, thank YOU for joining the conversation and trusting me enough to share your experiences with the TRUTH about Motherhood community.

Truthful Mommy Tells All~My TRUTHs about Motherhood

My TRUTH about Motherhood; My Sunshine

  • No Mommy is an island. Sometimes, it may feel like you are stranded alone and desperate on an island all by yourself with the crazy little natives but you are never alone. All you have to do is reach out and there you will find the sisterhood that will rescue you from the solitude and the drowning days. Make no mistake, that life preserver can come in the form of family, a friend,your husband, the next door neighbor,the lady sitting across from you at ballet rehearsal, a mommy of one of your children’s friends, a doctor, someone you’ve met online or through your blog, or a complete stranger. We only have to be open to seeing the preserver, which usually comes in the form of a honest conversation.

 

Truthful Mommy Tells All~My TRUTHs about Motherhood

My TRUTH about Motherhood, my Heart

  • It really does take a village to raise a child. I have not lived close to family  since having my children so I have had to be dependent on a small but mighty group of women who I am blessed to call my sisters. It only works if you can be honest though. Our tight knit friendships were forged through pain and honesty. The first step is acceptance. We had to accept that we are not perfect and everyone needs a shoulder to cry on, a hand to help up and an ear to listen during the tough times as well as a friend to truly enjoy the happy times.

 

Truthful Mommy Tells All~My TRUTHs about Motherhood

  • Children really do change everything. From the moment you are aware of their existence, they change you from the physicality of your body,what you eat, drink, your lifestyle, your finances, your perspective of the world, your job, your beliefs,your hopes and dreams even the very way that you move through the world.One thing I can guarantee you that you will experience when you have your baby, everything else that you ever held in esteem will become a distant second.

 

  • Truthful Mommy Tells All~My TRUTHs about Motherhood

 

  • You will love your children more than you have ever loved anything in the entire world. (maybe not at first and certainly you may not like them at times(especially the hormonal teen years) but you will come to love them always.)You will realize that you have forgotten most of your life before they came into it. You will realize that you are capable of being a selfless person, no matter how selfish you may have been beforehand.You will make sacrifices that you would have never in your entire life thought yourself capable of. Children test our character and stretch our hearts above and beyond capacity.
  • You will cry at the thought of them growing up and leaving, no matter how absolutely crazy they may drive you when they are screaming, fighting, tantruming, biting their siblings,asking you the same question 7000 times,or staying up all night with colic. No matter how hard they may make life in the moment, there is nothing greater than tiny arms wrapped around your neck telling you how much they love you….looking at you like a fat kid looks at cake.There is no greater love than that experienced between a parent and a child.
  • They make us better people.You will become a better version of yourself. Oh there will be days of complete doubt and feelings of incompetency and guilt. The guilt is almost too much to bear on some days. The guilt is the growing pains of motherhood. It is us metamorphosing into our better self. As we strive to be better people for our littles, we begin to experience regret for some of our actions. This is where we must forgive ourselves. No one is perfect. Some days we growl and roar and some days we cry and other days we do every single thing right and its the BEST DAY EVER but through every single minute of it…we love so big that our hearts are about to burst.This is love.
  • Naps are as important to Mommies as food and water are to the rest of the population. Naps for the kids so you can have alone time.Time to decompress, think and regroup…to hang on to that last thread of your sanity. Naps for you because Mommies need sleep. Repeat after me…MOMMIES NEED SLEEP. This is so you can function at human capacity, be a better Mommy and feel better about yourself.Start this routine before the baby is born. If you are tired, take a nap!
  • Motherhood is misery peppered with moments of complete bliss.It’s a lot of hard work with no downtime ( and really crappy pay) and anyone who says otherwise is a liar. But the moments of joy, all those moments that overwhelm and eradicate the minutia , they are so big that they fill our hearts like a camels humps and we can live on the joyous moments through the guilt and the self sacrifice and even the tantruming, nothing’s going right..I’m still in my yoga pants from yesterday and my hairs not been washed in a week days. The bliss is ethereal. The misery is relevant. One days misery is another days joy. Embrace it all, every single moment of it because it is fleeting.
  • You will never again think in terms of “Me” and “I”, it will forevermore be “We” and “Us”. It’s not enough that I have become this self-sacrificing, put them ahead of my every want and need, person. Now, when I walk through the stores..even when they are not with me physically, I say “Excuse us”” we would like…”. I get the strangest looks.  Because even though they are not by my side, they have taken up permanent residence in my heart and I am sure they will remain there throughout my time on earth( I wouldn’t have it any other way). I have finally began to emerge from my Mommy coma and remember who I am and what I wanted before they came into my life. But my perspective has changed, all that was SO important to me before is not that important to me now. Things that were completely unimportant are now vital. I have changed. I am constantly evolving.I am realizing that as they grow and need me less, I can claim a little more of my time and thought for myself but they still permeate the very core of all that I do.For example, I write this blog because writing is a passion of mine, always has been. But I write about my life as a Mother, which is directly influenced by them. See how that works:) I guess I can look at it as I have the best of both worlds.It just took me a little while to learn how to exist with a foot in each world without losing my balance and toppling.
  • Motherhood is the most humbling, amazing, insanity inducing experience that one can ever endure with a smile on their face and come out the other end feeling like not only did you survive but you changed the world. When I first thought of becoming a mother, I thought of holding a tiny new baby in my arms and loving it more than anything ever before or since. That I was spot on about. But I never could have imagined the ways in which motherhood has tested me physically, emotionally, mentally, intellectually, and spiritually. It has rocked my very soul. I have been pulled and pushed and stomped and scratched and beaten by motherhood only to emerge, stronger than I EVER thought I was capable of being. Motherhood has taught me that life is unexpected and in the experiencing is the living. We can not plan, organize, chart or will what life will bring to us when we have children. We are at the mercy of our all encompassing mother’s heart. I have been brought to tears by my child’s bravery, a tiny needle in an even tinier vein on my baby’s hand brought me to my knees, jaundice almost sent me into a tailspin, breastfeeding broke my heart, cartoons have made me cry, I have a phobia of raisins because one almost stole my daughter from me. I have gained superhero powers when the moment called for it. I have turned into a mother bear, tiger, and even a helicopter on occasion.I have become pliable where I used to be cut and dry. I have learned that I can bend and twist and stretch and pull and push but I will not break. I have learned that poop can be consumed in small amounts and not kill you. I have learned that pennies can be swallowed an come out the other end. I have learned that pearls, fuscilli, and popcorn kernels all fit perfectly up a child’s nose. I’ve learned that when a phone is in a grown ups hand a child will begin to talk incessantly. I’ve learned that when little people talk, they have a lot to say. I’ve also learned that they are a lot smarter and wiser than we give them credit for being.I’ve learned that when they are hurt or their heart is broken, my heart feels the pain..ten fold. I have learned that I would stop a bullet with my face if it meant keeping my child out of harms way. I’ve learned that if someone rear ends my car with my girls inside, they run the risk of a crazy whip-lashed lady jumping out of the car and attacking them. I’ve learned this and so much more that I’d need to write a book to share it all. But most of all,I’ve learned that MY world is a better place with my girls in it for me to love.

 

Truthful Mommy,My TRUTH about Motherhood

 My TRUTH about Motherhood, My Life

  • Motherhood is hard work.If anyone tells you any different, they are a liar. It is the hardest job that you will ever love. But there are moments when you won’t love it so much.That’s OK. That’s normal.If you loved every single second of every single day of Motherhood, we’d have to assume that you were on a high dose of prescription drugs or Mommy juice and that’s perfectly acceptable at times too. Just always remember, if you love your child unconditionally, do the best you can to teach them to be good people, and keep them healthy and out of harms way…YOU ARE THE BEST MOMMY EVER! (I know this because my girls tell me this daily, between the I hate yous and I love yous!)

P.S. This post originally went live on May 31, 2011 but I needed the reminder of all these things today. It’s a year and a half later and it’s still all relevant. I am guest posting at my friend, Gigi’s today talking about my early onset holiday burnout. She has a wonderful series called Around the Bonfire and asked me to join in. I am honored. Hope you will check it out.

I shared my TRUTH about Motherhood, what is yours?

 

 

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parenting

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parenting

akanemd

Parenting Techniques are like assholes..everyone has one!

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back-to-school

Back-to-School ; it’s the most wonderful or awful time of year (depending on how old your children are) again.

Back-to-School

  • Purchasing all the items on the school supply list is like a going scavenger hunt for the holy educational grail. It’s exhausting, exasperating and you will most likely not find the last item on the list.
  • Abruptly dragging kids off the beach to go school clothes shopping is like trying to take a carb starved model away from cake.
  • Trying to wake a kid ( who’s been sleeping in all summer) for school is like trying to lose ten pounds on the chocolate shake diet.

Back-to-School Truisms

  • Shopping for school uniforms is about as exciting as watching paint dry, for all parties involved.
  • Walking away from your child on the first day of kindergarten is emotionally harder than 13 hours of transition labor.
  • Lunches, do yourself a favor and invest in a bento box, one of those cooling Packit lunch boxes and make lunch for your kid. What they let pass for a healthy lunch these days are NOT what any Mommy in her right senses would consider “nutritious”. A bread stick, grapes and something fried…does not a healthy lunch make.

  • The first time you leave your child with strangers (school, ballet, daycare) you will cry and feel overwhelming guilt. You are not a bad Mommy. Guilt is the benchmark of a great Mommy.
  • For the younger sibling of a kindergartener, every morning is like sending the kindergartener off to war and every pick up is like the return from the war…safe and victorious.
  • NOT allowing your child to go on a field trip with 47 five year olds, 2 teachers and no chaperones is not only a good idea, it’s pretty much required for safety.

Back-to-School;Back to letting go

  • Watching your child struggle in social situations is like watching them try to learn how to walk for the first time. You stand back, see what happens and then you give them gentle nudges in the right direction,if all else fails, you grab them by the hands and show them how it’s done.
  • In all things concerning your child’s well being, trust your mommy gut. It’s not there just for decoration.
  • The first week of school will be exhausting, overwhelming and frustrating. It won’t be a picnic for the kids either.
  • You will take three trips to seven different stores to find that just right sized pair of uniform pants that fit perfectly and don’t look to “uniformy”, only to find out that they are $200 vintage khaki’s that were worn by Marcia Brady on an episode of the Brady Bunch and you can’t afford them anyways.
  • First day of drop off, you can be sure that some uber Mommy will walk right up to you , call you by your name and talk to you like she’s known you forever while you stand there speechless because your brain is fried from the summer sun and you have NO idea who the hell she is..
  • Seeking absolution from your drop off faux pas, you will feel the need to step up your Mommying game.This can cause you to do something foolish, like volunteer for several different committees. DO not do this.Your guilt will pass but those committees will expect you to show up.
  • Back-to-school is more than checklists, new clothes and a new school year. Back-to-school is letting go and growing up. More often than not, Back-to-School will leave you in a pool of snot and tears.

Back-to-School

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It’s been awhile since I’ve posted any of my truisms so I may have went overboard. Of course, they are all true and we all need to know that we are not alone in this crazy ride we call Motherhood. So, hang on to your cute little crocheted hats ladies…it’s going to be an exciting and bumpy ride!Happy Mothering!

  • No matter how much you spin, Turbo Jam,  or Zumba your body will never go back exactly the way it was before babies. It may be just as good but it is changed forever.
  • If you’ve given birth, you WILL pee just a little if you sneeze or laugh too hard. Expect it. If you don’t like it…Kegel it and/or get yourself some Mommy type pantie liners.You can not prevent this from happening, no more than you can prevent your stomach getting large when pregnant.
  • Once you have a child, you will NEVER get enough sleep again…ever..for the rest of your life!
  • Children can live on cheeze-its, string cheese and apples alone. I call it the connoisseur in training program. Add some grape juice to that combo and you are raising a child with a discerning palette.
  • Stretch marks are not sexy…to anybody.Anybody who tells you they are is either a) a liar b) a liar or c) really desperate for sex and totally in love with you for giving birth to their big headed child:)
  • If you ask your child a question and they a)smile…just a little bit ( more of a grin really) b)look away and say “I don’t know” or “No” c) if they blush even the slightest whilst avoiding eye contact and  grinning; they are lying to you.
  • Kids can be unintentionally cruel because half the time they know not the meaning of the words they are using, so always remember to take any insults they hurl at you with a grain salt.I realize it still hurts your heart but they DON’T mean it! If they did, I would have already thrown myself in the river as many times as my 3 year old has told me “Mommy, me hate you!”, today alone.
  • There is NOTHING, absolutely nothing, in the entire world that is sweeter than a two little arms hugging your neck and telling you “Mommy, you are the best Mommy in the whole wide world!”Of course, their world usually only includes your house…but hey, its nice to be queen:)
  • NEVER underestimate the power of a good Mommy friend, no Mommy is an island. You need her more than you know. When you find a real one, put yourself into her loving hands. She could possibly save your life.
  • When your little girl has her first crush and the little boy’s Mom informs you that they will be attending the Nutcracker solely to see your daughter perform ( because the little boy has demanded it) try not to flash forward to her wedding and tear up.They really do grow up too fast, don’t relinquish one moment of their childhood..in your head or otherwise.
  • Some days, you may feel isolated, overwhelmed, exhausted and like you have completely lost your mind..you probably have but take solace in the fact that there are many more of us out there like you than you think or could possibly know.
  • There will be a time in your Mommy life when you are on the fence whether you want another baby or not, when that happens and your ovaries start twitching and your uterus begging for a tenant, take a minute and think it over honestly. Remember, all the long sleepless nights, breastfeeding issues, explosive diarrhea diapers and then ask yourself… do I still want to go through that again?If the answer is yes or I don’t mind…Go for it!  ( well, after consulting your spouse of course:)
  • There is nothing more cute than a 5 year old and a 3 year old in their new dresses at a tea party, and nothing as lovely as the excitement and wonderment in their eyes when they watch the Nutcracker ( or anything to do with Christmas for that matter) ballet for the first time.
  • As a mother, sometimes you will have to say, do things, be friends with people you don’t like for your children’s best interest..learn it, live it, love it!
  • It is your right as the Mommy to refuse to let your child go on a field trip that has no chaperones, two teachers and 47 kids.Do not buckle under peer pressure. It’s your child; it’s your decision..final answer!
  • In all things concerning your child’s well being, trust your gut.It’ s not just there for show, its there for a reason.
  • There is something unresistably precious about a half asleep baby stumbling out of bed and climbing up into your life( Freudian slip) lap and cuddling (even if it is 10:30 and you’re trying to write a post) let them. Savor the moment. Kiss the top of their head and bask in their cuddles.Soon, they will outgrow your lap.
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It’s time for a few more of my Mommy truisms.Growing sisterhood through motherhood, one truism at a time! Enjoy.

  • Being a new parent is like high school,everything is life or death and you are certain that each wrong decision will ruin the rest of your life.But in the end, you grow through it, survive it, and become a better version of yourself.
  • Conjugalorium:another word for a co-sleepers unused bedroom.Go ahead, you paid for it.Someone should be using that extra bed.
  • Sometimes kids will get completely naked to use the bathroom.Don’t ask why.You will not receive a coherent explanation.Save yourself the brain hurt.
  • Having children is like walking around the world with an open wound.
  • 8 out of 10 parents co sleep with their children at some point in their childhood; 2 out of 10 admit it!
  • Bending down, using your stern voice and scolding an adult who has wronged you is perfectly acceptable behavior from a mother.

  • When your 3 year old screams incessantly “Me hate you!”, as much as you’d like to say,”Oh yeah, you are NOT my favorite person right now either” hold your tongue.They will hear you.They will remember it and you will pay for your slip for the rest of your life!

  • Cherish your spouse; they are your forever, children are just a temporary horror show.

  • Hiding in the bushes in the dark, in a dark hallway or under the basement stairs and jumping out to scare your kids is perfectly acceptable at Halloween, but only if you have first made sure they are not inflicted with long QT syndrome.
  • Not allowing your child to go on a field trip with 47 children, 2 teachers and NO chaperones is not only a good idea, its pretty much required for safety.

  • Handing children sippy cups, goldfish or cheerios, stopping skirmishes, searching for dropped crayons, holding ice cream cones, changing Barbies & babies, and changing a DVD, lowering or raising the volume, hitting play or wiping clean are all activities that you do in the car that are MORE dangerous to the safety of your children than using your cell phone.

  • Sometimes a spontaneous dance party is exactly what is needed to save the day!

  • There is no such thing as loving on your child too much.Go ahead.Try.I dare you.It can’t be done. Children deserve all the love that you can possibly give to them.

  • Knowing the previous information, NEVER withhold your love from your child as a punishment.If you do, you are the mental defect and should be judged accordingly.

  • Parenthood is an endless succession of minutia, but pay attention, within the minutia is hidden the most spectacular miracles.
Happy Mothering and come back for tonight’s Throat Punch Thursday post.
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I guest posted over at One Savvy Mom over the weekend. I told you all it would be available on Friday but it actually was posted on Sunday so many of you probably missed it. I know how much you all love the Mommy Truism’s so I am re posting them here to share with all of you.

  • Watching your baby be born in a mirror is much like watching a horror movie but holding your baby for the first time is as close to heaven as you will get on earth!
  • Sleep ~ By far, the most important part of EVERY Mommy’s day. 
  • Motherhood is misery laced with profound moments of complete bliss!  
  • Naps~ When babies nap, Mommy MUST nap too or complete collapse will ensue (Mental, physical, and emotional meltdowns are guaranteed).

  • Emotionally the first day of Kindergarten is harder than 13 hours of labor, for Mommy.
  • When your child gets intentionally hurt by another child, survivalist Mommy intuition makes you want to trip, kick, hit, beat, or bite the 3 foot tall offender.
  • For the little sister of a kindergartner, every morning is like sending the kindergartner off to war and every pick up is returning home safe and victorious.

  • Naps ~ Keeping children alive since the beginning of time.
  • 99% of the time, when giving birth… you WILL poop on the table!
  • Watching your child struggle in social situations is like watching them try to learn how to walk for the first time. You stand back and try to see what happens, and then you give them gentle nudges in the right direction, if all else fails, you grab them by the hands and show them how its done.
  • Mommies are the healthy, organic meal that sustains our children; Daddies are the dessert.
  • No matter how you try to prepare yourself, what your age, religion, race, sex, socio-economic standing- the moment you first set eyes on your newborn baby will leave you breathless!
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Just a few more of my Mommy Truisms to brighten your Labor day!

  • Labor is like being stuck in rush hour traffic~annoying, boring,uncomfortable and full of anxiety
  • Delivery is like minding your own business and suddenly being kicked in the head by a unicorn flying overhead~ painful, unbelievable and magical.
  • Watching your child learn/experience something for the very first time is more awesome than winning the lottery and a lot more likely to happen in your lifetime.
  • Vaccinations hurt Mommies 97% more than they actually hurt our children.
  • Listening to what your 3 year old is trying to tell you is so much more important than any phone call, email, television show, chore~all that other stuff will still be there, your 3 year olds childhood will not.
  • Firsts are so hard because they lead to lasts.
  • The first time you leave your child alone with strangers (school, ballet, soccer, gymnastics, daycare) you will cry and feel extreme guilt~ You are NOT a bad Mommy!
  • Guilt is just a side effect of being a great Mommy!
Happy Mothering, my friends!
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