web analytics

MY First EVER….Throat Punch Thursday

by Deborah Cruz

Throat Punch Thursday~ So, all week, I have been waiting for Throat Punch Thursday because, let’s face it, I’ve had a crappy week and I had a ton of shit to complain about..shark week will do that ya know? There was so much I wanted to punch in the throat. Then today, asshole that life can sometimes be, the sun comes out and life is all diamonds and ice cream ( yeah, its my own new saying..watch everyone will be saying it soon). I mean seriously, the day that I actually need to have a throat punch delivered life plays a happy joke on me. My husband is coming home in the morning..yey! SO, I can’t throat punch him. My girls were super  awesome ( probably because I wasn’t being a raging bitch), so couldn’t would absolutely NEVER throat Punch them. I actually get to have a real life, honest to goodness Anniversary date with my husband this weekend, complete with fancy restaurant, movie  and drinks ( MIL is coming to sit, so I can stay out and play in peace!) Certainly, NO throat punch there. Then I looked in the mirror and much to my OMG WTF! chagrin, seems I have spontaneously developed a bindi smack dab in the center of my forehead! Can I throat punch a pimpleBindi? Seriously, the weekend of my first date alone with my husband in what seems like a hundred years but is actually more like 5 ( still…a very long time). Where’s that little bastards throat? I’m punching…and then I  am snapping a photo for posterity’s sake! Take that blemish, you bastard!

Crap!! So, I was trying to look up a photo of a bindi or a pimple to illustrate my point about my blemish when I came across this photo of Bindi and Steve Irwin. Buzz kill. I have a new candidate for a throat punch, pimple step aside, the damn Stingray that killed the Crocodile hunter. It’s gotta be a hard one, its 4 years too late but it still breaks my heart. My Bella has always loved the Wiggles Safari video, as does her lil sis Gabs, and every single time I see that crocodile hunter….I want to cry. So, new plan..I’m throat punching the damn stingray who iced the Crocodile hunter. What a cheeky bastard to do some dirty shit like kill a kids hero! Bindi, this ones for you! Truthful Mommy’s going to throat punch the crap outta that stingray and maybe Elizabeth Hasselbeck too ( just because she really friggin annoys me!)

You may also like

Leave a Comment

* By using this form you agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

3 comments

Nikki 2010/05/14 - 12:41 pm

Ok…so the title "Throat Punch Thursday" almost made me pee my pants. I'm seriously sitting here laughing to myself right now. You know how some things just catch you totally funny…well this did for me!! I could so throat punch so many people!!! I LOVE it!! My new saying…and I like "all diamonds and ice cream" I'll try to spread it for ya!

Reply
Lucy 2010/07/20 - 9:36 pm

This is a great idea. Sometimes, you just gotta vent!

Reply
Throat Punch Thursday ~The Flu 2011/12/15 - 1:23 pm

[…] got the flu~ Unfortunately, today I am feeling way to ill to write my Throat Punch Thursday. The girls have been sick now for going on 3 weeks, previous to that, I had a sinus infection and […]

Reply

This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. Accept Read More