Would you ever put a hidden camera in your teen’s room to spy on them? Forget for a second about the invasion of privacy aspect, is there anything that you wouldn’t do to make sure that your child was alright? What if meant the difference between life and death? What if your child were in danger? Would you spy on your teen?
Last night, I read an interesting post on a parenting board. A divorced couple has a 15-year-old daughter and share custody. This past weekend the girl was staying the night with her father and stepmother. When she went to bed around 1:30 in the morning, she noticed a green light glowing near her vanity mirror. She went to investigate what was there, hidden beneath a scarf that was draped over the side of the mirror was a hidden camera. She freaked out and called her mother to come get her. She never wants to go back there again. I understand feeling like your privacy was violated, especially when you are an almost 16-year-old girl. I am sure that she was fuming.
Her mother took the situation to the boards to ask if she should call the police and file a report. She asked her ex-husband why he had installed the camera and he said because when the girl is at his house, she is always in her room and he wants to know what she is doing. The mother openly admits to randomly spot checking the girl’s social media pages. As a person, I feel both are an invasion of privacy. As a mother, I can understand wanting to communicate with your child so desperately and being shut out that you would stop at nothing to make sure they are okay. No one wants to be the parent who missed the signs and ends up finding their child after they’ve committed suicide or accidentally overdosed.
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Many of those on the board encouraged the mother to file charges, calling the dad a pervert. Honestly, I’ve had my diary read when I was a teen and I was flabbergasted. I was so pissed that someone would invade my privacy, reading my private thoughts. As a teen, I felt that if I had wanted her to know what was in my diary, I would have told her myself but really, there were things that I wanted to talk to her about and I just didn’t know how to bring it up. I was too embarrassed and she never asked so, I just suffered ignorantly through adolescence until I was older.
I don’t see a difference in this girl’s mother checking her social media and her father installing a camera. The commenters on the board automatically called the father a pervert but he’s her father, not a stepfather, not a stranger. I don’t think most fathers are capable of having sexual feelings for their own flesh and blood daughter. I think there was no sexually deviant aspect to this situation and it’s nothing more than a concerned father who desperately wants to know what is going on in his daughter’s head and wants to keep her safe. Granted, he needs to go about it in a way that is open and honest. Ask her.
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The camera was a definite invasion of privacy, as is reading someone’s diary and checking their emails and social media. But I think it’s crazy for all these strangers reading the mother’s board to automatically go to calling the father a pervert.
What do you think? Is daddy a pervert or just a concerned parent? If you thought your child might be getting itself into some kind of trouble, is there anything you wouldn’t do to protect her/him from harm?