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The TRUTH About Motherhood

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  • Be A Better Challenge- Day 21-23

    Friday’s Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 20 – Keep a journal
    I’d love to say I did a fabulous job but that would be a total lie. I had visitors from out of town and it was impossible to find time to post , little lone journal. I am however going to give it a try this week. I’ll keep you posted. How did you ladies do?

    Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 21 – Fake it

    Try curtailing your “anger” (which The New Girl determined was more of an impulse control issue rather than anger) by actually faking it. Rolling your eyes, moving along, and pretending.
    You’ll see in the comments that she’s not at all saying that you should fake how you’re feeling. Big difference. So that’s not what I’m talking about at all.

    But in many cases, we often let ourselves blow up quickly when really, if we just rolled our eyes and looked at the bigger picture, we’d have way fewer massive blow-ups.Basically,we need to fake our reaction. Feel your feelings but fake control:)

    Let me know how that works out for you. I know I will have to work hard on this one. I have a quick temper and I have to work hard to step back and think. I am interested to see how this works out.

    Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 22 – Dates with your kids

    Whether you’ve got one kid or a bunch, it’s really important to spend individual time with them. It’s obviously a little easier when you have just one, and then, increasingly more challenging the more you add to your brood.God knows I spend most days feeling like one is being left out. It was so much easier for me when I only had one. I adore both, but its hard work making sure everybody gets the same attention and no one feels left out or slighted. Lucky for me, they have no issue with letting me know!

    So #22: Plan a date night with your kids
    Granted, it doesn’t need to be a night, obviously, and it certainly doesn’t need to be anything extravagant. In fact, it could be something that you always do together, month after month. Breakfast out? Trip to a special playground? An afternoon at a museum? This is difficult for us Mommies who are part time single Mothers or those who are actual full time single mothers but it is possible. It’s hard for me to give them each individual personal time because they are so close in age and I can’t justify leaving one out. I am planning on making the time while my 5 year old is on school, special time for my 3 year old and I. I will do the same for my 5 year old, while the 3 year old naps. It’s the best Ic an do.

    There are so many fantastic ways for you to connect individually with your kiddos, especially outside of your home, which always seems to be bogged down with 400 things that you need to do other than spend alone time with them. But if you can look past the laundry and the ignore the dishes, quality time can easily be spent int he comfort of your own home.Let me know what ideas you have fro “Date Night” with your kids. How did it go?
    And how did faking it go? 

    Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 23 – Give ’em choices

    Only a little over a week left, folks. I hope you’re still with me.I hope that you are feeling like you’re getting something out of this. I am loving the challenges and feel like I am being proactive in my parenting.
    I also have noticed by utilizing these techniques I have eliminated a lot of the regular tantrums and meltdowns that we were having, which is AWESOME!!!

    And I do hope you found some ideas for date “nights” with your kids. I realize that those are a little hard to do impromptu, but you can certainly plan ahead.

    #23: Give ’em choices
    Giving your kids choices is a fantastic way to get them to do what you want without a battle (ha) but also to allow them some control, which is super important – particularly for the younger set (i.e. 2-5ish). The key here is to only give them TWO. Yes, and only choices that you actually want to abide by, Don’t make offers that you have no intention of keeping. This is how I have always done choices and it seems to work pretty well. It creates a sense of autonomy without letting them get out of  your realm of control.

    Forget “What do you want for lunch?” questions and give them options. Just two.
    Or when it comes to getting out of the house “You can put your shoes on and come with us, or leave them off and stay here.”This is one of my favorites, Basically, look kiddo you can do as I say and get to go do something fun or we can just stay here. My girls chomp at the bit to get out of the house ( they have their Mama’s cabin fever gene) so usually it goes as I plan. Of course, if you are dealing with a overtired  or sick child, expect the unexpected sometimes they go rogue and  you find yourself punished and unable to leave the house:(

    My favorite: “You can pick up your clothes off the floor or I can pick them up and take them all to Goodwill.” Desperate times, mamas.Desperate measures. This works with my girls because they are clothes fanatics. But you get the picture….”Pick up the Barbie dolls or I will pick them up and give then to the homeless!” See, its easy..just be sure to follow through or you will lose all control….forever!

    Anyway, you get the idea. Now go give it a try. Let me know how it goes!

    Just a reminder, the Month of September, I will be doing a month long Be a Better Me (You) Challenge in celebration of my Birthday! Hope you can all join me. There’s more to us than just being a Mommy, so next month we will give some attention to that woman:) Also, I am trying to reach a goal of 1000 followers by my birthday September 25, so if you are not already following please do.If you already are please pass it on to your friends who you think might like it, tweet it, Facebook it. Only 432 more followers needed:)Happy Mothering!

  • A journey of 1000 Miles starts with a Single Step; The First Day of the Rest of My Life

    Well, after last weeks posts,most of you are aware that I have had some  issues with my weight. Or should I say that I have struggled with my weight since I was old enough to realize what weight and body image were.I wasn’t necessarily heavy the entire time but you remember how when you were a teenager, absolutely everything was life or death, well for me the entire focus was on my body. I had thin athletic parents and all my friends were stereo typical cheerleader types in high school.So, that made being average sized feel like I was morbidly obese, though I was not.

    Then I went away to college and I was so deathly afraid of gaining the “freshman 15” that I literally started starving myself to death. Since then, its been a string of me trying to find a way to keep my body at a weight that was healthy without starving to death or restricting myself.It’s a hard balance to find.I’ve lost and I’ve gained, like most women in America. ..the world, really. You start having children and before you know it, you’ve put on a few extra pounds here, then a few more there and soon you are looking in the mirror and wondering who the hell this person staring back at you is in the mirror. Being a Mommy, I am guilty of always putting my girls first. I try to find time for me but it is truly few and far between, especially now with the Big Guy gone so much for work. A couple months ago, I decided it was time to find my way back to “me” in Mommy. I really made a concerted effort to find some me time, exercise, make myself look presentable, date nights and some of it has stuck and some has not.One of the first things I noticed  to go, as I sit here typing in my yoga pants and sweatshirt, was the taking time to get ready in the morning.Don’t get me wrong, the reminder has eliminated the yoga pants and ponytails appearance every day. But I realized as I don’t feel good in my own skin; my body isn’t where I want it to be, it has become harder to feel presentable..even in a nice dress and a hot pair of heels.

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    This was in September this year on my Birthday.This is what I look like today as I start this journey!

    So, I have resolved that I need to lose some weight, for me. Not for my husband or society but for me.I was joking and told my husband that I was going to call this journey my journey from hot mess to hot mommy but that’s not true. I am  NOT a hot mess. I’ve pretty much got it together,with the exception of my weight. I’m simply a woman on a journey to feel comfortable in my own skin. Lucky for me, I have been given an amazing opportunity to be a part of the Nutrisystem Nation blogging program. They have agreed to help me on my journey by providing me with the tools and convenience to reach my goal this time, in a healthy way. No, I’m not making a big reveal of my starting weight..I’m honest, not crazy, but my weight is the one thing I keep private. This is a very big deal to go public with my weight loss journey because it is the one part of my life that is usually off limits. But I trust you, you’re my friends. You’ll be supportive and that’s what I am counting on. You are my accountability.I will keep you posted once a week on my progress.

    You, my friends, have been with me through the metaphorical thick and thin of my life over the past year, now I need your support in the the physical thick and thin of my life. I’m starting this journey today…right now. My plan is to combine a lot of Nutrisystem with a good amount of Zumba and a brand new perspective. I want to feel at home in my own body, not like I am visiting a strange planet. I want to be healthy,I want to be a good example for my girls.I want to be able to keep up with my 3 and 5 year old. I want to not be mortified to get in a bathing suit for swim lessons.I want to believe my husband when he tells me that I am sexy.I want the mirror to reflect someone I recognize.I want to be around for a long time to see my children grow up and have my grandchildren. I want to be comfortable in my own skin!

    DISCLOSURE: Nutrisystem is providing their  program to me free of charge in exchange for my participation in the Nutrisystem Nation Blogging Program and weekly updates. I am not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed in this post are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255

  • Mommy Sex and the Man Cold a Tale as Old as Time

    Mommy Sex and the Man Cold a Tale as Old as Time

    Mommy sex and the man cold don’t mix. If you thought pregnancy and crabs was the worst things you could catch from unprotected sex, you’ve never caught the man cold. And when I say protected, I’m not just talking about wearing a condom, I’m talking about sporting some sexy hazmat suit from head to toe. I learned the hard way that mommy sex and the man cold are a bad combination.

    I woke up this morning feeling like I had been run over, backed up and run over again by a mac truck full of cattle. That’s almost how bad I felt, but actually…I feel worse than that. I blame myself, really. Apparently, there are no “poor girls not gotten laid in awhile” pass clause when it comes to your husband being sick. Girl, if you back that truck up and let him cough on you…hey, sex at your own risk; proceed with caution.

    See, normally I’m all, “Don’t kiss me on the mouth” all hooker style when he’s sick. But being with the way things are lately ( the whole living situation, limited time together) once we hit the conjagulorium all bets were off. In the heat of the moment, I didn’t care where he kissed me I was more focused on the fact that he was home to kiss me at all. Desperate times, desperate measures.

    Now, I’m sneezing so much that I’ve already had to change my panties twice this morning and its only 1 pm. I’m coughing non-stop. My throat hurts like I swallowed razor blades and then took a shot of Drano and my voice is crackling. I have a runny nose that keeps producing the most unladylike green substance that I have ever seen in the entire of my whole life.

    That’s not even mentioning my chapped red nose, my chapped lips, my deafness and lack of smell. Plus I pretty much feel like I am walking around in a big giant bubble of sickness.

    Guess what? A 3 and 5-year-old, don’t care. They don’t give even one fuck that I caught daddy’s man cold. One’s yelling at me because I won’t take them to Healthworks science museum, the other one is pissed off because she wants me to bring up her winter clothes from the basement and all I really want to do is curl up and try not to die. Why won’t these tiny people let me be sick in peace?

    So, you can just imagine what happened when I saw the dirty dishes in the sink this morning. You know, the dirty dishes that I asked the Big Guy to do before he left back out of town. I believe my exact words were,

    “Please do the dishes before you leave. I’ve done them for three months straight and I think I might blow my head off if I have to do them again!”

    Really, does he want me to blow my head off?  Because sure as I am standing here with a red nose and a pocket full of green riddled used Kleenex, he left those damn dishes for ME! It wasn’t too big of a deal until I was on my way to pick up Bella from school and realized on top of everything else…I have to NOW do those damn dishes.

    I texted him.Something to the effect,  “I am dying over here. Are you fucking kidding me!!!!Thanks a LOT!!!”

    His response….”I shouldn’t have taken that nap you FORCED me to take” ( yeah, he was sick so I was being nice but it wasn’t like I put a gun to his head and FORCED him into bed).

    Next, as if he wanted me to murder him, he said: “Leave them until next weekend. I’ll do them then!”

    Really, seriously, as if I am going to leave dirty nasty dishes in the sink until the weekend. I’m NOT and I’m pretty sure he knows that.

    But I am really sick and don’t feel like doing the dishes. In fact, it’s probably the last thing that I want to do right now. I may, however, throw them all in the garbage.

    Anybody else have these kinds of days? Just me then? So, to recap, thanks honey for the literal kiss of death you shared with me and the dirty dishes that you left me, as well. Anything else that you want to give me? Maybe a hefty case of gonorrhea? lice? The Bubonic plague? Dysentery? 5 loads of laundry? Throw up in the bathrooms? See you this weekend, the dishes may or may not be waiting too.I guess it depends whether or not they sprout legs and walk away on their own.

  • Impostor in the House of Mommy

    Some days I wonder what am I doing? Who have I become? What have I done to deserve this? Whose life am I leading?Really, whose life am I leading?Someone please tell me and when the hell did I become someones Mommy and wife?

    We all compare ourselves to other Mothers.They are our gauge. They are who we measure our self against when we are alone in our thoughts.Most likely we feel like we are coming up short.At least I do, on those days when the whole thing feels like its a house of cards and I have sneaked into the game but have absolutely no idea what he hell I am talking about or doing. I feel like I will be discovered for my deceit at any moment and my rouse will be ousted for all the world to laugh at.This is motherhood for me. I do have moments where I feel like damn, I am doing a stellar job.I am kicking ass at this gig and then I remember that I forgot to brush my 3 year olds teeth…again or that I forgot to read my 5 year old’s library book that has to go back today or we are having cereal for dinner..AGAIN. Or when they are both having meltdowns and arguing with me simultaneously and I lose it. Those are the shameful moments.The moments that I want to crawl into a cave, fall into a pool of snot and tears, and wave my white flag admitting defeat.

    But who, WHO is going to do this job better than me? Who else is going to love my children with their everything; I love my kids with my entire being.That is why they can make me crazy and break me down.That is why I feel like a failure. That is why my standards are set so high. Not because I love them less but because I love them more than I know how to express. When Motherhood is good it is blissful, when my girls are sweet little angels and we are cuddling up watching some Disney movie while munching on pizza and milk or lying in bed at night, quiet and still like Gods most precious creature. These moments , I almost can’t stand how wonderful they are.These are the moments that make me question why I don’t have 6 kids like my Mom. But when its bad, its gut wrenching and mind fucking and it hurts..bad.I don’t think there is anything quite as awful for a Mother than being overwhelmed and exhausted and having to be helpless as your child runs a 105 degree temperature. You do everything you possibly can, while your hurt breaks for a whimpering child and you wait for something worse to happen.Or having to lie on top of your 3 year old little boy to hold him down as they do a spinal tap on him for his leukemia and hear him scream “I hate you Papi” as he cries helplessly and lashes out at the only person he knows that loves him so unconditionally that it doesn’t matter what he says, Papi will still love him.The helplessness is crippling.

    So, when I feel like I am an impostor in the house of Mommy I have to remind myself that I am human, first and foremost. No one is perfect. We are not born Mommies. We are not sent off to school to train for this job. There is no license or certificate of  achievement. There is only loving..lots and lots of loving , growing and learning. What makes you feel like a spy in the house of Mommy? What do you do when you feel overwhelmed and under qualified for this job? What makes you feel accomplished? What do you do with your children that you know is right and amazing? Now, go forth and love your munchkins because no body can do that better than you!Breathe…. Happy Mothering!

  • Mommy Truisms:The Dangerous games Mommies play edition

    It’s time for a few more of my Mommy truisms.Growing sisterhood through motherhood, one truism at a time! Enjoy.

    • Being a new parent is like high school,everything is life or death and you are certain that each wrong decision will ruin the rest of your life.But in the end, you grow through it, survive it, and become a better version of yourself.
    • Conjugalorium:another word for a co-sleepers unused bedroom.Go ahead, you paid for it.Someone should be using that extra bed.
    • Sometimes kids will get completely naked to use the bathroom.Don’t ask why.You will not receive a coherent explanation.Save yourself the brain hurt.
    • Having children is like walking around the world with an open wound.
    • 8 out of 10 parents co sleep with their children at some point in their childhood; 2 out of 10 admit it!
    • Bending down, using your stern voice and scolding an adult who has wronged you is perfectly acceptable behavior from a mother.

    • When your 3 year old screams incessantly “Me hate you!”, as much as you’d like to say,”Oh yeah, you are NOT my favorite person right now either” hold your tongue.They will hear you.They will remember it and you will pay for your slip for the rest of your life!

    • Cherish your spouse; they are your forever, children are just a temporary horror show.

    • Hiding in the bushes in the dark, in a dark hallway or under the basement stairs and jumping out to scare your kids is perfectly acceptable at Halloween, but only if you have first made sure they are not inflicted with long QT syndrome.
    • Not allowing your child to go on a field trip with 47 children, 2 teachers and NO chaperones is not only a good idea, its pretty much required for safety.

    • Handing children sippy cups, goldfish or cheerios, stopping skirmishes, searching for dropped crayons, holding ice cream cones, changing Barbies & babies, and changing a DVD, lowering or raising the volume, hitting play or wiping clean are all activities that you do in the car that are MORE dangerous to the safety of your children than using your cell phone.

    • Sometimes a spontaneous dance party is exactly what is needed to save the day!

    • There is no such thing as loving on your child too much.Go ahead.Try.I dare you.It can’t be done. Children deserve all the love that you can possibly give to them.

    • Knowing the previous information, NEVER withhold your love from your child as a punishment.If you do, you are the mental defect and should be judged accordingly.

    • Parenthood is an endless succession of minutia, but pay attention, within the minutia is hidden the most spectacular miracles.
    Happy Mothering and come back for tonight’s Throat Punch Thursday post.

  • Be A Better Me (You) Weekend Challenges-Day 17- 19

    Sorry to those of you who have been following along. The weekend has once again gotten away from me. It’s really hard for me to spend time on the computer when I have my husband home with me. Our time is few and far between , so I have to make it count. Please forgive me. I know that you all understand! But here are the challenges that I issued for the weekend.

    Be A Better Me (You)  Challenge – Day 17 ~ Cook what you want for dinner
    Sounds simple right? I’m not sure about you but I spend a lot of time making what every body else wants, will eat or prefers. My choices usually are not even considered. I mean, I don’t cook food that I hate(I’m not trying to punish myself) but I also don’t ever say “Tonight, I’m going to make exactly what I like!” I can’t because, its not usually what the rest of the family wants. But my challenge for you is a simple exercise in remembering that you count and what you like. Pick a night and cook whatever it is that YOU like. How many times have you made what your husband likes to make dinner special? How many times have you choked down your kids favorites so they’d be happy? Probably always, right? Tonight, make what you want. If you didn’t have to consider picky eaters palettes,what would you eat? Me, well, I love sushi, eggplant and green peppers. All things that are very much unappreciated by the rest of my family. Maybe a little eggplant parm is exactly what this situation calls for in my house. What would be your dream meal?

    Be A Better Me ( You) Challenge- Day 18 ~ Get rid of a bad habit
    We all have something we do that we don’t want to do or is not necessarily good for us.  These things serve as crutches to us. I don’t want crutches anymore. I am tired of being hobbled and want to stand straight on my own two feet.Bad habits are developed over time and serve no good purpose in our lives. The bad habit I have that I’d like to kick to the curb is needing the validation of asking ” Does this make me look fat?” Seriously, how is that question helpful? It means I am obsessing over my looks and expending my energy in a very negative way. It’s also liable to make me a bad Mommy if my girls hear this slip out of my mouth. I don’t want to pass on my weight issues. Why am I asking? If I am or I am not, or it does or does not make me look fat..is irrelevant. Even feeling like I need to ask the question, needing that validation is crippling me from being the best me I can be. If it bothers me then I should just work on it. I am my own worst critic and really no matter what the Big Guy answers, I am never satisfied. I need to stop asking that damn question; more importantly stop needing that validation from others. I need to just work on the problem and fix it rather than questioning myself and others. So,I am going to stop asking “Does this make me look fat?” To do this, I must work to make sure that I know that I am not. If I am not, then it stands to reason that I can not look like what I am not! End the end, ending this habit will be the catalyst to making me be a better me for me.What is your bad habit that’s keeping you down or holding you back?

    Be A Better Me ( You) Challenge- Day 19 ~ Breathe; Relax
    Stop snickering. It’s very simple but sometimes we need to be reminded. Life has a tendency to snowball and overwhelm us. It’s really a miracle what  difference having the forethought to stop, breathe deeply, exhale and relax. My Mom has told me this since I was a child and I never believed or fully understood. Quite frankly I thought she was a little crazy. It seems with having children I am gaining great wisdom and insight into the world around me. For example, one more thing I learned to understand fully, why parents would ever think of sending a teen aged daughter away to boarding school and pay all that money for virtually a baby sitter. Believe me, if these young emotionally charged years are any indication of what may be to come, I may be putting a kidney for sale for some peace and sanity. But lately, I have been trying to breathe. I will admit it has been a last resort, but it was the only way I could come to it. It’s making me a better person because its giving me the control to be in charge of my emotions and not fly of the handle, which, lets face, seldom works and usually just leads to guilt. I just feel like a better person being able to control my reactions to the world and situations that it seems to keep hurling at my head. Breathing make me feel in control and control is what winds my clock people.I can’t imagine how awesome I’d be if I could make myself meditate. Something I may have to make some time for. So, breathe and relax is your challenge. Just try it! I promise, you’ll like it.

    Just a challenge update, my friends, I am sitting here with my hair fixed, and a dress on. I feel pretty cute. A little effort went a long way this morning! Also, I am sitting here in peace and quiet because the Big Guy has taken the girls shopping leaving me with some quiet , alone time. God bless him. And next week, BIG Guy and I have date night for my birthday. I can not wait. So be warned, there will be no posts next weekend! But I will be living the challenge..and the dream! Happy Mothering!

  • Be A Better Me ( You) Challenge – Day 21 ~ Listen to your heart

    Yesterday’s Be A Better Me (You) Challenge- Day 20 ~Be nice to someone; Pay it forward
    is one that I plan on getting started on right away. I already let someone cut in front of me in the drop off line at school. They seemed frustrated and in more of a hurry than me so I figured, rather than getting annoyed to just let them go. Hopefully, that small gesture will make their day go a little smoother for them. It was a very small gesture, I know, but it’s got to start somewhere. Hope you are being nice to others today and paying all random acts of kindness forward!

    Today’s Be A  Better Me (You) Challenge- Day 21 ~ Listen to your heart.
    Really listen to what your heart wants. The only true key to happiness is following our hearts desire. Certainly, it is smart to follow your head, but I think total rationality is overrated. How many people do you know that go along or do things because they are supposed to not necessarily because they want to? What kind of quality of life are we having if we always do the right thing..or what is expected? Sometimes you have to be brave and follow your heart, even if it seems crazy. One of the craziest things I ever did was agreeing to marry the Big Guy after only dating for 3 months. My mind told me I was crazy if I said yes and my mind told me that obviously he was crazy for asking. I thought about it long and hard, but my heart kept drowning out the negativity of my brain. Of course I was afraid that it wouldn’t last, that impetuous leap he asked me to take. But my heart kept saying, You are crazy if you don’t take the leap. It could end in embarrassing failure or it could be the biggest and best adventure of your life. It could be your happily ever after. My heart talks a lot, just like the rest of me:) I took the chance and  it was scary for me to make such a rash decision but look at where I am  now; 11 years of marriage, 2 beautiful little girls, and more love than I could possibly have imagined. Listen to your heart, it just may open up all the hidden treasures that your life has to offer.Besides, I think our heart knows what will truly make us happy opposed to our head who only knows what society says will make us happy.

  • Hopping, Fawking & a pretty much all around Good Time!

     Happy Friday everyone! It’s that day of the week again when its time to get your socialization on! Once again, I am blog hopping like a madwoman trying to reach my birthday goal of 1000 followers by September 25th. So, if you are visiting please follow and if you already follow..thank you so much! 
    Just wanted to let everyone know that the Be a better ME Challenge is in full swing already.Please stop by and link up! We all deserve to be a priority on our to do list! So let’s get our self love on!
    Hope  you all have a glorious long weekend with your lovely families ; enjoy one another, relax,and just embrace the now! Happy Mothering!And if you are a Mommy Blogger please grab the badge to the right

     

    1.  If I didn’t have to work anymore I would…. travel the world with my family and then travel some more!
    2.  My favorite thing about a vacation is …. getting away from the minutia of my everyday;experiencing new things, people, places, and the vacation mentality…all bets are off, there are no limits.
    3.  When packing for a trip I…. pack half the house up because I have little kids, then I squeeze all of my husbands and my stuff into a carry on bag. Always over packing ( cause lets face it all I really need is a pair of shorts, t-shirt,a bathing suit,a pair of jeans, a nice shirt and a dress & undies, of course) and never actually bringing what I actually want to wear.

    4.  If I could go on a road trip with anyone (dead OR alive) I would choose…( aside from the big guy) my 2 best girlfriends; Nikki and Nicole because we would have an absolute blast  and we would go somewhere in the Mediterranean were there is loads of sun, beaches, hot men for your viewing pleasure ( as we are all married and looking is all we can do:), good food, good wine, and good friends & conversation; really what more could I ask for?

    OOPs, just saw that it said “ROAD TRIP” so same people, same, reason,  but we would go from Chicago to the west coast, enjoying some girl time, the great outdoors,  culminating in California with some good shopping and spa treatments!

    5.  My top 3 absolute travel essentials are …my iphone, my sunglasses, my toothbrush!

    6.  Vacations are … a well deserved break from every day life.

    7.  On vacation you must always  …relax, enjoy your surroundings, live in the moment, leave your worries far, far away.



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    Now for my FAWK yous of the day:

    • Fawk you to this jacked up sickness that has taken me hostage for the past week. Sure I love sounding like an old smoker, coughing up my lung, cold sweats,and general malaise as much as anyone but enough already!
    • Fawk you to my RX laced cough syrup that helps me to sleep but makes me see unicorns and ligers. Oh wait, no ..no fawk you to that!
    • Fawk you to having to “watch the money”! I just want to experience a little bit of excess of money sometime.
    • Fawk you to Irish football starting this weekend; my town is overrun with crazed football fans jamming my route to Bella’s school. Get out of my way people!
      Fawk You to the little one catching whatever I have. Sick Mommy + Sick Baby = Not a good time!
    • Fawk You to my 3 year old telling random people “You must be going to have baby. Your tummy is all lumpy!”
    • Oh yeah, FAWK ME because she said it to me too:)



  • Mommy Truisms;the Labor Day edition

    Just a few more of my Mommy Truisms to brighten your Labor day!

    • Labor is like being stuck in rush hour traffic~annoying, boring,uncomfortable and full of anxiety
    • Delivery is like minding your own business and suddenly being kicked in the head by a unicorn flying overhead~ painful, unbelievable and magical.
    • Watching your child learn/experience something for the very first time is more awesome than winning the lottery and a lot more likely to happen in your lifetime.
    • Vaccinations hurt Mommies 97% more than they actually hurt our children.
    • Listening to what your 3 year old is trying to tell you is so much more important than any phone call, email, television show, chore~all that other stuff will still be there, your 3 year olds childhood will not.
    • Firsts are so hard because they lead to lasts.
    • The first time you leave your child alone with strangers (school, ballet, soccer, gymnastics, daycare) you will cry and feel extreme guilt~ You are NOT a bad Mommy!
    • Guilt is just a side effect of being a great Mommy!
    Happy Mothering, my friends!

  • Be A Better Parent Challenge- Day 21-23

    Friday’s Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 20 – Keep a journal
    I’d love to say I did a fabulous job but that would be a total lie. I had visitors from out of town and it was impossible to find time to post , little lone journal. I am however going to give it a try this week. I’ll keep you posted. How did you ladies do?

    Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 21 – Fake it

    Try curtailing your “anger” (which The New Girl determined was more of an impulse control issue rather than anger) by actually faking it. Rolling your eyes, moving along, and pretending.
    You’ll see in the comments that she’s not at all saying that you should fake how you’re feeling. Big difference. So that’s not what I’m talking about at all.

    But in many cases, we often let ourselves blow up quickly when really, if we just rolled our eyes and looked at the bigger picture, we’d have way fewer massive blow-ups.Basically,we need to fake our reaction. Feel your feelings but fake control:)

    Let me know how that works out for you. I know I will have to work hard on this one. I have a quick temper and I have to work hard to step back and think. I am interested to see how this works out.

    Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 22 – Dates with your kids

    Whether you’ve got one kid or a bunch, it’s really important to spend individual time with them. It’s obviously a little easier when you have just one, and then, increasingly more challenging the more you add to your brood.God knows I spend most days feeling like one is being left out. It was so much easier for me when I only had one. I adore both, but its hard work making sure everybody gets the same attention and no one feels left out or slighted. Lucky for me, they have no issue with letting me know!

    So #22: Plan a date night with your kids
    Granted, it doesn’t need to be a night, obviously, and it certainly doesn’t need to be anything extravagant. In fact, it could be something that you always do together, month after month. Breakfast out? Trip to a special playground? An afternoon at a museum? This is difficult for us Mommies who are part time single Mothers or those who are actual full time single mothers but it is possible. It’s hard for me to give them each individual personal time because they are so close in age and I can’t justify leaving one out. I am planning on making the time while my 5 year old is on school, special time for my 3 year old and I. I will do the same for my 5 year old, while the 3 year old naps. It’s the best Ic an do.

    There are so many fantastic ways for you to connect individually with your kiddos, especially outside of your home, which always seems to be bogged down with 400 things that you need to do other than spend alone time with them. But if you can look past the laundry and the ignore the dishes, quality time can easily be spent int he comfort of your own home.Let me know what ideas you have fro “Date Night” with your kids. How did it go?
    And how did faking it go? 

    Be a Better Parent Challenge – Day 23 – Give ’em choices

    Only a little over a week left, folks. I hope you’re still with me.I hope that you are feeling like you’re getting something out of this. I am loving the challenges and feel like I am being proactive in my parenting.
    I also have noticed by utilizing these techniques I have eliminated a lot of the regular tantrums and meltdowns that we were having, which is AWESOME!!!

    And I do hope you found some ideas for date “nights” with your kids. I realize that those are a little hard to do impromptu, but you can certainly plan ahead.

    #23: Give ’em choices
    Giving your kids choices is a fantastic way to get them to do what you want without a battle (ha) but also to allow them some control, which is super important – particularly for the younger set (i.e. 2-5ish). The key here is to only give them TWO. Yes, and only choices that you actually want to abide by, Don’t make offers that you have no intention of keeping. This is how I have always done choices and it seems to work pretty well. It creates a sense of autonomy without letting them get out of  your realm of control.

    Forget “What do you want for lunch?” questions and give them options. Just two.
    Or when it comes to getting out of the house “You can put your shoes on and come with us, or leave them off and stay here.”This is one of my favorites, Basically, look kiddo you can do as I say and get to go do something fun or we can just stay here. My girls chomp at the bit to get out of the house ( they have their Mama’s cabin fever gene) so usually it goes as I plan. Of course, if you are dealing with a overtired  or sick child, expect the unexpected sometimes they go rogue and  you find yourself punished and unable to leave the house:(

    My favorite: “You can pick up your clothes off the floor or I can pick them up and take them all to Goodwill.” Desperate times, mamas.Desperate measures. This works with my girls because they are clothes fanatics. But you get the picture….”Pick up the Barbie dolls or I will pick them up and give then to the homeless!” See, its easy..just be sure to follow through or you will lose all control….forever!

    Anyway, you get the idea. Now go give it a try. Let me know how it goes!

    Just a reminder, the Month of September, I will be doing a month long Be a Better Me (You) Challenge in celebration of my Birthday! Hope you can all join me. There’s more to us than just being a Mommy, so next month we will give some attention to that woman:) Also, I am trying to reach a goal of 1000 followers by my birthday September 25, so if you are not already following please do.If you already are please pass it on to your friends who you think might like it, tweet it, Facebook it. Only 432 more followers needed:)Happy Mothering!

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