The TRUTH About Motherhood

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Gabriela McBride American Girl of the Year 2017 Giveaway
My girls are growing up fast. Faster than I could have ever imagined back when they were learning to crawl backwards and walk then talk. Everything used to feel like it took an eternity. Now, everything is so fast. Now, I’m the one saying, “Wait up! Stop this train. I want to get off.”
The girls are no longer toddlers and preschoolers but elementary aged girls headed straight for that awkward in-between age. You know that time where kids look like puppies with overgrown paws? You know they are going to eventually grow into themselves but they still have that dang baby face that you just want to smother them with kisses. That is until they roll their eyes at you. I swear I spend a lot of time talking about rolling eyeballs on this blog lately. My mom used to wish a daughter “just like” me on me when I was a teen. Now, I get it. I’ll have two.
Anyways, in a lot of ways they are growing up. They can do a lot of stuff on their own. Heck, I even let them play outside in the yard with no supervision these days. (why yes, I am a recovering helicopter mom.) They have their own phones and they can have real conversations about the world but, in many ways, they are still my babies.
I love seeing them develop into the kind of people they are going to be someday. I see interests and issues that they love and support. They are thinkers and doers and that makes me proud. One loves to write and the other draw. One loves to dance and the other do gymnastics. They are similar but so different. Their personalities are really emerging at this age and it’s a beautiful thing to watch. I feel like one day I will be able to say, I was there when.
One minute they are making music.lys and the next they are playing with American Girl dolls. One minute they are telling me, “No mom, I can do it myself.” And the next, they are coming in hot for mommy time. Hey, I’ll take it. I’m not complaining. I know these moments are fleeting. Yes, even the eye rolls. I’m sure one day, I will even miss those.
So, I really appreciate it when there are toys that they can play with and love but at the same time love and learn from. It’s rare that you find that because toys these days are either strictly for flexing the brain or completely pointless other than wasting your money and maybe giving your kids a few hours of entertainment. Yes, I realize those smiles are priceless.
I’ve always been a fan of dolls. Maybe because I’m a girl. Maybe because I have girls or maybe I just like the idea of a toy that teaches a child to be nurturing and compassionate; a “toy” that teaches your child to care for something else. It’s even more so when it is relateable to the child. Shared physical traits or, in the case of American Girl dolls which have their own backstory, shared interests and books to elaborate on that kinship.
This year’s American Girl of the Year is Gabriela McBride. Gabriela (the doll) is a quiet and creative girl growing up in a family of artists. In her story, Gabriela struggles with stuttering, but uses the power of poetry to find her voice and gain the confidence to make a difference in her community. I can relate to this because I was a clutterer and writing has always been my way of expressing myself.
The first book Gabriela, hits shelves in January and tells the story of a quiet and creative girl growing up in a family of artists. Gabriela inherited a love of the arts from her parents, especially her mother, but spoken word poetry is becoming her own passion. Although Gabriela often finds herself in a battle with her own words because of her stuttering, she discovers that her poetry, filled with wit and honesty, helps her speech flow more easily and gives her the confidence to find her voice to help save her beloved community arts center from being torn down.
As many of you know, I have my own Gabi who also happens to be a creative. She dances and loves to scribble on her drawing pad or in her journal and when she’s not doing that, she is making music.lys. You see, my Gabi is also a quiet girl who is an old soul. She is very observant and loves anything artistic and animals, more than just about anything else. She’s quite shy when around new people but through music.ly, she has opened up by being able to express herself without someone looking directly at her and she has been blossoming. Her music.lys are pretty hilarious. I just love seeing her enjoy herself and double bonus when she and her sister do them together because that means they are not bickering, as they so often do lately.

The 18”Gabriela doll has curly dark-brown hair and warm brown eyes. The first thing my daughters said when they saw her was, “Look mama, she looks like you!” It’s true, we both have some pretty awesome curly hair and warm chocolate eyes. Only, I wish I was a dancer.
My Gabi fell in love with Gabriela McBride the moment she saw her. She loves that Gabriela is musically inclined and has cool accessories that she can use further personalize her experience to Gabriela like the performance case and the creative studio.
The performance case has everything Gabriela needs to set a performance or mix music. The case includes a laptop with a retractable cord for her drum pad and microphone, as well as 3 reversible and interchangeable screens. The drum pad can be plugged into the computer for sound mixing and comes with drumsticks. The case also includes a stylish pair of stylish rhinestone headphones so she can tune everybody out and prepare for a performance.
Gabriela loves nothing more than to dance, create and dream in the studio at her community center, much like my Gabriella and her beloved ballet studio. The creative studio comes with a metal barre that’s perfect for practicing moves from her ballet board and a reversible backdrop with the interior and exterior of the studio. It also comes with a water bottle, because every dancer needs to stay hydrated and a soft yellow towel because every dancer knows after a hard class, you sweat. Your tiny dancer or future YouTube, music.ly or funimate star will adore these add-ons for Gabriela.
Additional Gabriela products and books will be available starting this spring and, for the first time ever, the Girl of the Year collection will be available for a full 12 months and beyond!
To connect both boys and girls with Gabby’s inspiring message, American Girl is partnering with Scholastic, the world’s largest publisher and distributor of children’s books and leader in comprehensive educational materials, to create and distribute Express Yourself, a custom curriculum program that teaches 3^rd-5^th grade students how to use poetry as a tool for self-expression. The free materials will be available on www.scholastic.com starting March 1, 2017, and include teacher lessons and corresponding classroom activities, a poetry poster, plus parent tips and learning ideas to do at home. In addition, to celebrate National Poetry Month, the program also features a poetry contest for students that will run throughout the month of April. The Express Yourself program will encourage all students to find their creative voices and share their own personal stories, while building confidence along the way.
To learn more about Gabriela and the Girl of the Year^™ line, go to americangirl.com, Facebook at facebook.com/americangirl, Twitter at twitter.com/american_girl, Pinterest at pinterest.com/agofficial, and American Girl’s Instagram page at instagram.com/americangirlbrand.
I was provided a doll for review by American Girl and they are letting me give one away to one lucky reader. Just leave a comment on who your favorite American Girl doll is and why below in the comments section and enter via the rafflecopter entry.
a Rafflecopter giveaway

2017/02/21
The Different Kinds of Moms You Meet on the First Day of School
How can it already be the first day of school? This morning my girls went back to school and, honestly, I am not ok with it. Usually, by this point in the summer, I am ready for them to go back to school. We all begin to get a little bored with one another and crave our routine but not today.
This morning, I wanted to sleep in and cuddle a little longer. I wanted my morning pile in. I wanted brunch and long conversations about nothing. I wanted to watch all the cheesy horror movies and rom coms together. I wanted a few more lazy days of togetherness. I wanted it to be harder for them to go but it wasn’t. It was one of the easiest mornings we’ve ever had.
We just got back from a relaxing RV beach vacation in Cape Hatteras on Monday. Tuesday, I took the girls to get their new back to school/big girl haircuts and pick up some back to school supplies. Yesterday, we had a lazy girl’s day with grandma and today, I swear my girls aged 3 years since we returned from vacation. I’m not joking, I’m positive Bella grew 2 inches this week because she’s at least 2 inches taller than me now and she wasn’t last week.
I used to write about wanting to collapse in the kindergarten corridor because all the new moms were doing it. Misery enjoys company and if everyone else is doing it, well, there’s no shame in assuming the fetal position and sobbing like a baby. Then I moved on to doing a sort of ninja warrior sprint through the kindergarten hallway to get to my slightly older girls’ classrooms.
READ ALSO: Why 3rd Grade Sucks and I prefer the Weeping Mothers of K-2
By last year, I was cocky. I wasn’t crying. I was thrilled about the sound of silence that fills an empty house. I even brazenly walked my girls, right past those collapsed moms, stepping over the one by one, chest puffed out as I walked my girls to the middle school corridor. I walked them into their classes and kissed them just because I could. I knew they wanted to run rather than let the other kids see but unfortunately for them, years of being the cool room mom have made my presence always acknowledged by the kids.
But this morning, my big girls with their long legs and new hairstyles didn’t need me to walk them in. There was no box full of Kleenex and disinfectant wipes to use as an excuse so I dropped them in the drop off line like all the other parents. Both of them in the middle school corridor this year.
I would have been fine except the Big Guy, who obviously hates me when he kissed us each goodbye this morning told the girls to have a great first day. Bella, my eighth grader, said, “Nah, it’s going to be boring.” because that’s what eighth graders do because they are actually too cool for school. To which my brilliant and cruel husband responded, “Well, enjoy it kiddo because next year it’s off to high school for you.” Then, he left and I fell down dead. He killed me and I’m sure he didn’t think twice or even realize that I am wounded.
READ ALSO: The First Day of Kindergarten
So instead of dropping my girls off this morning and doing my happy dance for uninterrupted work time and no more background noise of tween/teen bickering, I dropped my girls off with a swift kiss and an I love you. I think my voice may have even cracked as I swallowed hard to compose myself. I don’t think they even noticed and that’s what I want. Independent, happy young ladies who face every new day and challenge like it’s an adventure. I let go and it freaking hurt. Hey, what’s going on? This isn’t kindergarten.
I won’t lie, I thought of pulling into the primary parking lot and taking a stroll into the kindergarten corridor to be among my people this morning because I could have used a good fetal position ugly cry. The girls would have never known. Instead, I came home and wrote a sad post about letting go when you don’t want to and holding on for as long as you can. But eventually, we all have to let go. And damn it, next year there’s high school. I wonder if they have a secret freshman mom hallway where I can ugly cry? Well, you know me, where there’s a will there’s a way. If there isn’t one, I’ll make one.
Happy first day of school moms.
Whether you are celebrating or sobbing, you’re doing it right and don’t get too cocky, motherhood is not a straight line. There is an unexpected ebb and flow to it. Some days you are on top of the world and other days, you are in desperate need of life’s kindergarten corridors.
2018/08/09
Must Have Wordpress Plugins for Every Blogger
There are a million Wordpress plugins for Wordpress sites and they are constantly updating an evolving. It is hard to keep up. Hell, if you are new to Wordpress, it’s difficult to even know where to begin. I’ve had my site for almost 4 years (next month) and I’ve been on Wordpress for the past 2.5 years. I still am finding new ones that I should have been using like Facebook page promoter, which is my new favorite this week.
My personal recommendations for must have Wordpress Plugins are as follows:
Akismet: Akismet checks your comments against the Akismet web service to see if they look like spam or not and lets you review the spam it catches under your blog’s “Comments” admin screen.
Wordpress SEO by Yoast: WordPress SEO plugin goes the extra mile to take care of all the technical optimization, more on that below, it first and foremost helps you write better content. WordPress SEO forces you to choose a focus keyword when you’re writing your articles, and then makes sure you use that focus keyword everywhere.
Alpine Phototile for Instagram: The Alpine PhotoTile for Instagram is capable of retrieving photos from a particular Instagram user or tag. The photos can be linked to the your Instagram page, a specific URL, or to a Lightbox slideshow. Also, the Shortcode Generator makes it easy to insert the widget into posts without learning any of the code.
Comment Luv: CommentLuv Pro has even more amazing features that can bring even more traffic and comments to your blog by giving you the ability to fight spam, add keywords, integrate twitterlink, add a top commentators widget, social enticements and by having it installed on your site, you get advanced backlink features on EVERY CommentLuv blog when you comment (there are 10’s of thousands of CommentLuv blogs)
Facebook Page Promoter Lightbox (My new favorite): All your visitors should know about your facebook page and tell their friends. With this plugin you can display a preconfigured Facebook Fan Page-Like Box inside a lightbox (overlay).
Official Statcounter plugin: The Official StatCounter WordPress Plugin brings you all the powerful StatCounter features to your wordpress blog.

I also did some research on Facebook and asked my blogger readers what they thought were the must haves. I have compiled that list for you! Enjoy, my friends.

Lizz Porter: Am I A Funny Girl
Tweet Old Post
Twylah
YARPP
No Right Click Images
GiGi Ross: Kludgy Mom
NRelated Content
Pretty Pinterest Pins
Greet Box
Rebel Mouse
Super Cache
Editorial Calendar
Social Author Bio
Melissa Arce Culbertson: MomcommComment Reply Notification
Woo Commerce
Popular Post
What would Seth Godin Do?
Corey Feldman: Corey Feldman
W3 Total Cache
Google XML Sitemaps
Hotfix
WPTouch
iFrame
Copyrighted post
Jetpack
What is your must have wordpress plugin? Please share in the comments!
2013/04/26
Fashion Haul Friday Shabby Apple Dress Giveaway
The Winner of the Shabby Apple Lois Lane Dress giveaway is Jodie Walcutt. Congratulations, Jodie!
Fashion Haul Friday Shabby Apple Dress Giveaway and Review ~ This week’s Fashion Haul Friday find is a fabulous Shabby Apple dress. I’m pretty sure every woman with fashion sense knows what Shabby Apple is, so I am positive all of you already know of Shabby Apple boutique. If you are not familiar with Shabby Apple,let me tell you a little about them, they are an awesome company who makes chic vintage inspired clothing for women. The clothing has a very classy, feminine feel and is made to fit a woman’s body…a grown woman. A woman who has lived and had children and still has a lot of vivacious living to do, like you! Their vintage inspired dresses remind me a lot of the dresses women would wear in days gone by when silhouettes were more feminine and softer. The dresses are elegant and make any woman feel a little more beautiful. But the best part, aside from having loads of styles available, the price is affordable. Shabby Apple makes fashionable clothing and accessories affordable for every woman, including us Mommies who seldom get the chance to shop for ourselves and when we do dare shop for ourselves we are frugal and feel guilty if we spend too much on ourselves. Shabby Apple alleviates that guilt.
Shabby Apple does not disappoint
The dress that I chose to review was the Lois Lane. First of all, what images and ideas the very name Lois Lane invoke? Super savvy and intelligent, but remove the glasses and she is Superman’s super smokin hot leading lady. What more is there to know? There is just something about a fitted, flattering red dress that makes a woman feel sexy in her own skin. I know every girl needs a little black dress but this red dress packs a punch that you can’t pass up. You will certainly get double takes when you walk into the room. It fits generously but is curve flattering. The color is deep and looks beautiful on just about any skin color. I really love the fact that you can wear the collar down for day time or up at night time to give it a little more spunk. I prefer it up! The Lois Lane is shown here with black pumps, it would also look hot paired with those back leather boots or the 5 inch Steve Madden heels from our last Fashion Haul.
Shabby Apple Lois Lane Night Time

Shabby Apple Lois Lane Daytime
Features:
A tulip blossom collar adorned in ruffles tops the innovative and utterly provocative Lois Lane trench dress. Awash with delightful details Lois Lane’s french coat styling, with asymmetrical buttons running from hemline to left shoulder, ruffled tulip sleeves, cinched-and-sashed waist and flouncy hem is a show-stopper you cannot miss. Wear the collar up for greater drama or down for a sweeter look.
Dress fits generously.
I think this dress is gorgeous and I think many of you will too! And bonus, Shabby Apple has given me the chance to offer a Lois Lane dress to one of my readers. You know you want this! To enter to win is simple.
Mandatory Entry to win the Shabby Apple Lois Lane dress: Follow The TRUTH about Motherhood on Facebook and leave me a comment on my wall.
For more entries:
1) Follow Shabby Apple on Facebook (1 entry)

2) Email Subscribe to The TRUTH about Motherhood (+2 entry)
3) Tweet this giveaway by copying and pasting the following; Awesome #giveaway for @ShabbyApple Enter to win a sassy new dress @truthfulmommy https://motherhoodthetruth.com/?p=6783 Please RT {1 entry per daily tweet}
4) Stumble and like this post (+2 entries)
5) Add my blog to your blog roll ( +2 entries)
Leave a separate comment for each entry. The giveaway will be closed December 8,2011 Thursday night 11:59 pm EST and chosen randomly. The winner will be announced in next Friday’s Fashion Haul Friday post. Contest is open to U.S. residents only and you must be over 18 to enter.Winner will have 24 hours to respond, if not a new winner will be chosen. Good luck. I’m sure any of you would look gorgeous in the Lois Lane!I have one request and that is that whomever wins this gorgeous dress will take a photo of themselves and share it on The TRUTH about Motherhood Facebook page.
Also, Shabby Apple is offering a 10% off discount to all The TRUTH about Motherhood readers on all of your Shabby Apple shopping this holiday season. The code is Truthful10off and the code is valid until January 2,1012. I hope you will all take advantage of this code and get yourself a hot little party dress for this season; YOU DESERVE IT!
*Disclaimer: Shabby Apple is providing the gorgeous prize for the giveaway. The opinions expressed in this post are my own. I was in no way compensated for writing about the Shabby Apple company.
2011/12/11
The Kids are Not Alright
Estimated reading time: 9 minutes
We’ve all been so worried about keeping our kids safe from Coronavirus that we’ve forgotten to keep their mental health safe from seclusion. Check in on your teens and little ones, they are not alright. Not even close. I put my girls in therapy last April at the beginning of the pandemic and they are still struggling. We can’t shelter them from the world but we can try to ease the weight of the world so many of us are feeling. Below are some Tips to Help your Teen Survive Depression, Anxiety and Pandemic Burnout.
It’s not fine. We’re not fine. They’re not fine. The kids are not alright.
We’ve been quarantining since March 9^th. Our life went on pause and everything we had planned for the spring and summer was canceled. Nothing is like it’s supposed to be. The new normal absolutely sucks. We are a family of huggers and kissers. Friends are family and family is everything. We’re explorers and adventurers. We celebrate life in the small moments but this past year has been hard to find the silver linings.
Disclaimer: Firstly, let me start by saying I am not a therapist or a trained mental health professional. I’m just a mom who is very self-aware, has years of therapy under her built and pays a professional to treat her children. A good licensed mental health professional to follow for great tips is Katie Hurley.
Bella turned 15 last March 10^th and 16 this year. March 14^th , 2020 was supposed to be her quinceañera. We planned for years for her big day. Everything was ready to go. The dress, the court, the venue, DJ, photographer and videographer. It was going to be the quinceañera she had been dreaming of since she was a little girl. Friends and family from around the country were flying and driving in to celebrate our special girl. I can’t even put into words the devastation I felt taking that away from her. It hurts to even think of it now, especially since we rescheduled it to August 8^th and had to postpone once again. Instead of getting the quinceañera of her dreams, she didn’t even get a proper birthday celebration. Her birthday was basically skipped for the past two years thanks to CoVid.
Gabs turned 13 last May, the day after what was supposed to be last day of school. There was no party. No family and friends to hug and play with. There’s no theme or games in the backyard. There was no bbq with 50 of her favorite people. There was a birthday drive-by parade which made her pandemic heart break with gratitude for those who showed up. She felt alone and forgotten. The smallest gestures mean so much when human contact is few and far between.
But how do you help your teen survive pandemic burnout?
https://youtu.be/gXFjjwGlVsw
We’ve learned not to take things for granted. We know the worth of our freedom to move throughout the world safely. We know the value of a hug and human interaction in real time. Virtual is a poor substitute but it may be the only thing offered at the moment.
Our kids are resilient. They are strong and they are amazing. They carry on even when they want to give up but everyone has their breaking point, even you and I. I’ve been doing everything that I’m supposed to do and still, people I love are getting sick. People I know are dying. My heart is breaking but I’m trying hard to keep my mental stability. Manic mom has even made an appearance this pandemic and I was hoping to never see her again. I’m trying to be strong for the Big Guy and the girls but even I notice that while I’ve had to adopt the let it go, one day at a time mentality, I am also holding on to things. I’m holding on to things and anxious about things I don’t even realize.
I’ve started clenching my jaw and my fists in my sleep from stress. I wake up sore. I’ve started finding myself angry for no reason at all or maybe it’s for every reason under the sun. Why would I think my girls are any different? They are younger with less life experience and more hormones. How could I forget that?
Check in on your kids. They are not alright.
https://youtu.be/BrP9UW9eOts
My girls have been overly silly. At first, I was annoyed by this but then I realized this silliness is what is allowing them to get through this unbelievably stressful time. If they need to regress and find joy in the simplest things, who am I to judge? Right now, all bets are off. We’re all just trying to get through this pandemic. We’re in survival mode and that’s ok. Unfortunately, all that silliness has begun to give way to anxiety, depression and burnout and not just for them. I am burnt out too.
I’m so over virtual learning. Not only have my girls been virtual all year long, so have I. I had the bright idea to get a masters and enrolled a month pre pandemic. I’ve been struggling with burn out myself for the past couple months but watching my girls buckle under the pressure and anxiety of this non-stop pandemic life is too much. I hate it for them and can do very little to make it better other than pay for therapy and give out random hugs and encouragement all day.
Worse, I feel like I’m failing at that because I’m struggling myself. I hate all of this. There’s 2 weeks left of school for the girls and I feel like we’re all drowning. There’s no down time and days and nights are just one long exercise in never ending lists of shit to get done. I want to scream but I’m afraid if I start, I’ll never be able to stop. F*ck you pandemic and all the people who aren’t doing their part. I’m tired of my cage. I know this will pass but watching my girls struggle is the worst.
https://youtu.be/F_9K8Pgekwo
Tips to help your teen survive depression, and anxiety and overcome pandemic burn out.
- Create calm times of the day, preferably an hour or longer.
- Spend time with them doing silly and fun things like playing a game, being outdoors, cooking a fun meal (this helps kids calm down their nervous system so they aren’t so triggered by stress), or just plain talking.
- Structure helps kids know what to expect which always improves stress.
- Sleep and eat well (less sugar).
- Help them write about their feelings.
- Get them a therapist, many are offering virtual right now. Do it.
Anxiety specific simple but effective grounding techniques
Grounding Techniques
Grounding is a technique that helps keep someone in the present. They help reorient a. person to the here-and-now and in reality. Grounding skills can be helpful in managing overwhelming feelings or intense anxiety. They help someone to regain their mental focus from an often intensely emotional state.
Grounding skills occur within two specific approaches: Sensory Awareness and Cognitive Awareness.
Sensory Awareness
Grounding Exercise #1:
Begin by tracing your hand on a piece of paper and label each finger as one of the five
senses. Then take each finger and identify something special and safe representing each
of those five senses. For example: Thumb represents sight and a label for sight might be
butterflies or my middle finger represents the smell sense and it could be represented by
lilacs.
After writing and drawing all this on paper, post it on your refrigerator or other safe
places in the home where it could be easily seen and memorize it.
Whenever you get triggered, breathe deeply and slowly, and put your hand in front of
your face where you can really see it – stare at your hand and then look at each finger and
try to do the five senses exercise from memory.

Grounding Exercise #2:
• Keep your eyes open, look around the room, notice your surroundings, notice
details.
• Hold a pillow, stuffed animal or a ball.
• Place a cool cloth on your face, or hold something cool such as a can of soda.
• Listen to soothing music
• Put your feet firmly on the ground
• FOCUS on someone’s voice or a neutral conversation.
Sensory Awareness Grounding Exercise #3:
Here’s the 54321 “game”.
• Name 5 things you can see in the room with you.
• 4 things you can feel (“chair on my back” or “feet on floor”)
• 3 things you can hear right now (“fingers tapping on keyboard” or “tv”)
• 2 things you can smell right now (or, 2 things you like the smell of)
•1 good thing about yourself
Cognitive Awareness Grounding Exercise:
Re-orient yourself in place and time by asking yourself some or all of these questions:
Where am I?
What is today?
What is the date?
What is the month?
What is the year?
How old am I?
What season is it?
Tips for parents
Build coping skills. One thing kids and teens need to hear on repeat is that all emotions are okay. There is no right or wrong way to feel about this global pandemic. Parents should get in the habit of checking in with each child privately throughout the day to give them an opportunity to verbalize feelings and talk about triggers.
Learn how to manage anger. Now is the time to figure out some techniques to decrease negativity in the home. In other words, stop yelling. Parents have a lot on their plates, and it is difficult to juggle work responsibilities, parenting responsibilities, keeping the family physically and emotionally safe, and running a distance-learning school. Chances are, you feel like you might snap at times.
Adjust expectations. To hear social media tell it, this is a time when everyone should be enjoying every moment and learning new things as a family (a privilege not everyone shares). And parents suddenly find themselves in the driver’s seat for their children’s education, expected to manage distance learning regardless of resources, finances, work schedules and child-care struggles. Then there are the expectations parents have of their kids regarding learning, training for extracurricular activities and being “productive” during this time away from school.
Practice empathic communication. There’s a lot we don’t have control over right now, and that can trigger negative emotions, but we can control how we respond to and communicate with others. One thing I hear on that tiny screen day after day during my sessions with kids: I just want my parents to understand me.
Tap into technology, and stay connected. Many parents spend a fair amount of time trying to manage and limit screen time. There are positives and negatives to technology, though, and now is the time to tap into the positives. It’s still important to focus on balance and make sure that kids and teens are getting exercise and engaging in activities that don’t involve screens, but technology can be a source of support, connection and education.
Parents, don’t forget to take care of your own mental health. It’s hard to help your teen survive depression, anxiety and pandemic burnout if you are holding on by a thread yourself. Believe me, I know. Find yourself some coping mechanisms and a licensed therapist.
2021/05/12
7 Things You’ll Need If You Want To Become a Mompreneur
If you’ve recently had a baby, work is probably the last thing on your mind. And that’s not just because you’ve… y’know… just had a baby! Parenthood changes you fundamentally. They don’t say it changes “everything” for nothing. The struggle is real. Motherhood literally alters your brain chemistry and definitely realigns your perspective. Suddenly all the things about the world at work that used to worry and intimidate you now seem like no biggie at all.
The truth is motherhood can actually be incredibly empowering and make a woman realize just how strong she really is. It can make you realize that you deserve better than you’ve been getting from your job and career and maybe your talents and passion were wasted in that old job all along. As such, while there are many women who are happy to return to their old jobs and their old careers, there are some who set their sights in a very different direction. You know who you are. It takes balls to forge a new way but many moms do just that.
READ ALSO: How Blogging Changed My Life
In the digital age, more and more women are realizing that they have the tools at their disposal to start their very own businesses, nurturing potentially thriving enterprises even as they nurture their little ones. Some of us become professional bloggers or copywriters, others use e-commerce to sell products that they make themselves. I love Etsy. Some moms become consultants while others become freelance illustrators. The sky’s the limit. We are moms hear us roar!
If you want to make your mark as a mompreneur, here are some things you’ll need…
Did you know that you can also use a different postal address for your business? It means that you get far more privacy if you run your business from home so it can be an essential service to use, see this wonderful virtual office service in Glasgow as it is what we use and it’s just brilliant.
A USP
Unfortunately, if you want to establish yourself in business (no matter what the nature of your business) a good idea just isn’t enough anymore. People start businesses based on good ideas all the time, but it doesn’t automatically guarantee success. In order to find success (and your audience). An easy way to find winning products using Ecomhunt will help you to have a clearly defined Unique Selling Proposition (USP),
Your USP will be what makes you different from all the other businesses out there doing what you’re doing and builds value in the brand you’re trying to develop. Don’t worry if you don’t come up with your USP overnight. Take the time to carry out extensive market research and competitor analysis. If you want to take a different direction then it’s a good idea for you to look into opening a franchise, as you won’t have to do a lot of the groundwork, like finding a USP.
READ ALSO: What Ever Blogger should Know about Blogging
Find the people who will buy your products or invest in your services. See what other businesses like yours are doing well and why customers are happy with them. Then try and identify things that they aren’t doing as well or gaps in the market that they’re currently failing to accommodate.
A strong presence on social media
Personality goes a long way in business. This was actually one of the first pieces of advice I was given when I started blogging as the mom of two toddlers. Embarrassingly enough, I had no idea what a “social media presence” was. In my defense, I had been pregnant and having babies for the previous 3 years. But I figured out quickly, people don’t like to buy from faceless, profit-hungry corporations. They like to buy from honest, genuine people who have decided to take their livelihoods and careers into their own hands. These people remind us that the dream works.
If people like you, they’ll buy/read/engage with you. Let your personality shine on social media. Find out more about where your target audience spends their time online and approach them on the platforms they use most. Combine your professionalism and commitment to quality with the fact that you’re a real person and mom trying to take care of your target audience in ways that your competitors won’t or can’t.
Maintain an active presence on your social platforms. Engage. Don’t be the person only sharing links. Nobody likes that person. Talk to people about things other than your business. Like what they post. Retweet them. It’s a little thing that goes a long way towards building the kind of personal relationship which is invaluable for small businesses. Other than social media, you should also be sociable in real life by talking to people and making new friends. You can instantly build connections with the help of metal business cards.
A strong brand identity
Your brand is what people say about your business when you’re not in the room. In order for your business to resonate, it needs a strong brand identity. Again, this is what will differentiate you from your competitors and help people to develop a personal relationship and trust you. You also have to make sure that the invoices you are sending your customers have the right template, like an InDesign invoice template, for a more professional-looking bill. Or, you might choose to portray your brand identity through your work uniform by having personalized novatomato hoodies printed. The great thing about these hoodies is that they are sustainable, so not only will you be able to keep up a strong brand identity, but you’ll be friendly to the environment.
You may be reticent to incorporate your motherhood into your brand. I wasn’t. I embraced it. I know who I am. I know my education, my skills and strengths but I also fully embraced that motherhood was a big part of who I am now. Being a mom doesn’t take away from who you were as a career woman before, it adds skills to it. You should see my organization and multipurpose skills now.
You may want people to see you as a businesswoman first, and a mother second, but don’t underestimate the brand appeal of your motherhood. People like Moms. We’re relatable. Everyone has one. People see moms as nurturing, reliable, dependable and compassionate because… that’s exactly what we are.
Online security
The beauty of being an entrepreneur in the (nearly) 2020s is that digital technology has made the world your office. You can check your emails while changing diapers ( though I certainly would not recommend it) and take conference calls in Whole Foods ( been there done that). You can make e-commerce listings sitting in your favorite coffee shop or keep in touch with your social following while breastfeeding.
And while that’s incredible, it can also make you and your business more vulnerable. Businesses of all shapes and sizes have a target painted on their back and cybercriminals may try and target your business and its data if they see a vulnerability. That’s why it’s important to ensure that not only does your laptop have robust antivirus software but all of your devices use a mobile-ready VPN while on the go. Cybersecurity is an important consideration when starting up your own business.
The biggest challenge when juggling your duties as a CEO (because that’s what you are, honey!) with your duties as a mother is time management. Why are there not more hours in the day? As much as possible you need to compartmentalize your time between “entrepreneur mode” and “Mom mode”. This is way easier to do when you have a dedicated working space either in your own home or a rented office. I have a home office but I am loving the new shared spaces available in my town and it may be something I look to soon. Of course, there will be some bleed between the two but the very act of moving into different functional spaces will help you to better organize your thoughts.
A blog
A blog is an extremely important business tool. It is my business. Whatever the nature of your business, it can almost certainly be assisted by having a blog. Remember what we were saying before about the importance of personality? A blog can give your following insight into your personality, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. It can also establish your knowledge, expertise and dedication to being the best there is at what you do. And that’s a big deal!
What’s more, your blog will also give you a boost in Search Engine Optimization and improve your visibility in search results.
Passion
Finally, the most important thing you can have as a Mompreneur is passion. Passion will propel you through those days where you’ve had 2 and a half hours’ sleep and it all seems a little too much. It’ll keep you going where others falter and keep building value in your brand that will set you on the path to success.
What is your tip for succeeding as a mompreneur?
2019/07/11
Why You should Visit Universal Islands of Adventure and why you shouldn’t
Estimated reading time: 5 minutes
We just got back from a quick road trip to Orlando. It was a pretty spontaneous decision, think of it as a red wire blue wire sort of situation where we were all about to die from being trapped in the house for a year and we decided to give Universal another try this time, we chose Universal’s Islands of Adventure. It’s home to themed lands like Jurassic Park, Seuss Landing, Marvel Superhero Island and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
The first time we went to Universal was way back in 2012. The girls were too little at that time but we didn’t realize that until we were there. So we spent a lot of money to stand in the rain and watch the gang from Victorious sing some songs on stage, rode 1 ride and went home. It was a bust. This time was definitely more fun for our family.

We figured the girls were older this time and definitely would love it. And while what we got to do see, ride and do was good it still wasn’t Disney. The thing is Universal and Disney World are completely different kinds of parks and if you’re used to Disney, you’re going into the whole thing with the wrong mentality. So here’s a quick rundown of why you should go to Universal Islands of Adventure and why you shouldn’t go to Universal Islands of Adventure.

Why you should visit Universal Islands of Adventure
·  Thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies
Universal Islands of Adventure has some thrilling rides. If you like to go fast and hard when you play, Islands of Adventure are for you. The rides will not disappoint but be prepared to be whirled, twirled, fast and furious and to the extreme. Warning: That Dudley Do Right Rip Saw River ride looks harmless but it is, in fact, Splash mountain on steroids and it is raging. It may be the most fun you’ve ever had getting wet but YOU.WILL.BE. DRENCHED. I suggest bringing either a poncho or an extra set of clothes.
·  You love Marvel
Not going to lie, the Incredible Hulk Coaster and The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman were two of the best rides I’ve ever been on. Did they both almost make me throw up? Yes. Did I love it? Yes! Did I lose my voice screaming from excitement? YES!! If you have kids over 8, they will probably love it.
·  You love roller coasters
Universal has some pretty awesome coasters that will leave you dizzy and discombobulated but screaming for more. If you love roller coasters, Universal Islands of Adventure is for you. Bonus; VelociCoaster is coming June 10th and we saw it being tested and it looks amazing.
·  Dr. Seuss makes you happy
I’ve spent a big chunk of the last 16 years reading Dr. Seuss whether it was to my girls, to my nieces and nephews or to the sweet preschoolers that I taught but I never found the stories to be as beautiful and endearing as I found Seuss area to be. It is bright, colorful and beautiful filled with whimsy and imagination. However, as I mentioned before, Universal is for thrill-seekers and even the carousel and The Cat in the Hat ride seemed to go very fast. I know the area looks like a kid’s playground but it isn’t as tame as it looks. We loved it but I’m not sure how well a toddler would fare.
·  Harry Potter fans
Hogsmeade is like immersing yourself in a Harry Potter book. It is beautiful and if your family are Harry Potter fans, it really brings the story to life. The butterbeer was amazing (we preferred the frozen) and the Ollivanders wand experience was really cool. However, there are only a couple of rides and Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure™ is only available by virtual queue and it is virtually impossible to get a spot. We had a time 3 times and the app booted us out and we lost our reservations. It was very frustrating.

Why you shouldn’t visit Universal Islands of Adventure
·      It expensive
There is the initial cost of the tickets (1 day/ family of 4/ $579), then if you don’t want to spend all of your time waiting in lines there is the option to purchase express passes ($69) and unlimited express passes ($89), parking ($26), and lockers ( $2 each time you ride something that requires you to put your bag in a locker). That is not including souvenirs, food and drinks. There are definitely more budget-friendly ways to plan your trip. Don’t wait to the lat minute like we did.
·      Express pass will make or break your trip
Unless you love waiting in lines and only being able to fit 4-6 rides in on your visit, you better buy yourself an express pass. It was our first real trip to Islands of Adventure so we didn’t know how any of this worked but now we know. If you are staying in a Universal hotel, which we were not, you do get express passes included in your hotel stay. But as we were not, we spent all day waiting in lines and didn’t get to experience as much of the park as we had hoped. Very disappointing. However, if you are staying at a Universal Resort express pass is included so I would highly recommend staying on grounds. Resort rooms were very affordable, we just waited too late to book.
·      CoVid rules de jour not de facto
Universal Islands of Adventure does have great guidelines in place for following CoVid safety protocol. However, not everyone was, you still had to scan your finger to enter the park and there wasn’t anyone really enforcing the rules in the lines until you entered a building. Several times, I had to ask people to step back and stay on their 6 ft apart socially distanced marker. That was very frustrating and made me feel anxious because people were invading my personal 6ft apart space.

In the end, there are more reasons why you should visit than why you shouldn’t. We wanted to love it but it wasn’t what we expected. Maybe it was CoVid? Maybe it was being unprepared? Or maybe we are just Disney people? Either way, we’d love to go back and give Universal another try and check out the VelociCoaster. It looks amazing and I’m sure it will be one more thrilling ride that my girls will fall in love with. Have you been to Universal Islands of Adventure? What is your favorite area? Favorite ride?
2021/04/13
Mommyish
Client: Mommyish
Website: https://www.mommyish.com/
Task: Freelance Writer
https://www.mommyish.com/author/deborahcruz/

2019/04/27
You’re Doing It Wrong! Fashion and Style Tips From The Pros
Fashion has never been an easy field for normal people to master. I love fashion but I feel that it’s very personal. My own personal style is all over the place. I don’t like to be boxed in or labeled in life and certainly not in my fashion choices. My outfits really depend on where I’m going, what I’m doing and, yes, how I’m feeling.
There are professionals who dedicate their entire lives to knowing what to wear and how to dress different body types, sizes and shapes. More than that, they know how to dress different personalities to feel empowered and comfortable in their own skin, turning heads while doing it. That’s not just a skill, that’s an art form. One that I’d like some guidance and appreciation for.
READ ALSO: Fall Beauty Tricks
Obviously, we don’t all have time to focus all of our energy on knowing the ins and outs of fashion and make-up. While I do love playing with both. My God people, I’ve got kids and a job and working out and cooking and cleaning to do. Let’s be honest, I want to live my life. I don’t want to overthink the little things like what I’m wearing. Thank goodness for professionals. While it wouldn’t hurt if we all knew the basics of fashion and what looks good and fits best for our body, we can do better for ourselves, especially with a little professional help.
Here are some Fashion and Style Tips from the Pros online
Makeup
Makeup is one of the hardest parts of a beauty routine. It can be very easy to do things that make you look out of place or a little bit strange, and a lot of people put huge amounts of time into getting their make-up look just right. Nobody wants to look like a clown. One of the most crucial elements of this is the colors and shades you choose. Natural looks are easier to achieve than those designed to make you stand out. With this in mind, you should be choosing options that match your skin tone, while also complementing the color of your eyes and hair. This will put you on the right track with your makeup and is a method used by makeup artists all over the world to get the right look for their clients.
READ ALSO: How to have a Quality Fashion Wardrobe on a Budget
Of course, makeup is more complicated than buying the best products. You have to know how to put it on. Applying make-up can be challenging and this is where most people stumble the hardest. Thankfully, there are a lot of guides around the web that can help you with this. Bottom line is that you can do amazing things with make-up with some simple research on the web and lots and lots of practice. Believe me, my girls can contour and do eyebrows like a boss just from watching hours of Youtube Beauty Vloggers.
Colors
Know your colors. Color is the next challenge you’re going to come up against, with the hues and shades of your garments, accessories, and makeup all working together to form a unified look. Everyone will have their own preferences when it comes to color, and it makes sense that you would want to wear your favorites.
READ ALSO: Tarte Sugar Rush Collection is Adorable and Affordable
There are lots of things to consider that can factor into this equation like the color of your hair, eyes, and skin playing important roles. If you like bright colors but struggle to pull them off because of the tone of your skin, for example, it could be worth looking for ways to incorporate them as accents, rather than the main parts of each outfit. There are loads of guides around the web which can help you to choose the right colors for your clothing.
Keep It Simple
It’s easy to find yourself layering up beyond reason when you’re struggling to figure out a style that works for you, and a lot of people overdo it with their clothing. Nothing speaks louder than something simple, though, and this gives you an excellent route to go down when deciding on your styles. For example, if you’re able to find a dress or blouse you really like, you should use your other pieces to draw attention to the main garment. Simple necklaces will draw people’s eyes to the neckline while surrounding a skirt with basic shoes and a shirt will make people notice the skirt most of all.
Let History Guide You
People have been putting a lot of time and effort into fashion for a very long time. In fact, in some countries, this has become a source of national pride, and there is a rich history when it comes to the clothing people choose to wear. You can use the past as a resource, giving you the chance to draw inspiration from those who have dedicated their lives to fashion. Vintage and retro clothing is always popular and is a great way to create a unique, timeless look.
READ ALSO: Why Primark is the Best Place to Shop with Teenagers
These are just a few tips I’ve gathered from researching the web and years of being a woman in the world. The bottom line, do what makes you feel beautiful. Don’t worry about trends or what other people think, if it feels good on your body and it fits, wear it. The only person whose opinion accounts is your own.
What’s your best fashion and beauty tip for busy women who want to look and feel beautiful but not spend all day worrying about it?
2019/10/29
Robyn Lawley Says Size 8 is Plus Sized ~Throat Punch Thursday
Robyn Lawley launched a plus sized clothing line that starts at size 8.8!!!!! As if girls today don’t have enough of a challenging existence just trying to survive the teen years with their self-esteem and body image in tact, now we are labeling average sized women as plus sized.What message is that sending? And honestly, do we grown women need any more media outlets to tell us we could lose a few pounds? Haven’t we all given Spanx enough of our money? Spanx wins every time. What.the.FUCK?
Gorgeous Australian model Robyn Lawley debuted her plus-size swimwear collection online this week, in hopes that it will eventually become the “go-to brand for swimwear for all women.” The collection includes swimsuits from size eight to 18 and ranges in price from $140 to $200. This idea I love; cute bathing suits for every woman. It is much like the Jennifer Lopez line at Kohl’s (a personal favorite of mine due to the fact that it fits my curves and doesn’t make me look like I am banished to a life of burkas for having an ass), the Kardashian Line at Sears who takes into consideration all body types and Torrid a store that makes fashionable clothing for women sizes 14-24 ( that is more in the realm of plus-sized.) These places and lines are awesome because they give women with a little weight on them cute clothes to wear so they can look like everyone else because believe me just because we are overweight doesn’t mean we want to wear ugly clothes or Mrs. Roper moomoos. We’re thick not blind for God’s sake.
Robyn says she swims a lot and found that in order to find swimsuits that fit her, she fell into a category that wasn’t very fashionable. Wait a minute, what? I’ve seen her photos, she is only a size 12 but the woman is 6 foot 2 inches tall. If she were any smaller than a size 12, she’d blow away. I realize a size 12 is considered obese for certain parts of the United States, like Los Angeles and New York but she definitely looks like the average fit woman to me. She doesn’t look overweight and there is no way she is shopping in the plus sized stores. Big and Tall, maybe. There is plenty of fashionable clothing in her size, unless she only shops sample sales. Then yeah, nothing probably fits because all of those pieces are specifically designed for anorexic 12-year-old boys who eat tissue paper and chain smoke. The only thing they get close to nutrition is if they accidentally drink a diet coke with lime. (Gotta keep the scurvy at bay.)
Lawley, who was the first plus-sized model to star in a Ralph Lauren campaign and appear in the pages of Vogue Australia, hopes her line will change the public’s attitude about plus-sized fashion. Despite the fact that the average American woman wears a size 14 or larger, Lawley said companies still cater to the smaller segment of the population. The whole idea that Lawley is even considered plus sized in the first place is preposterous. She is a beautiful, average body type woman. The fact that any asshole wanted to pat themselves on the back for letting a “plus sized model” fatty, fatty two-by-four that she is in his campaign in the first place needs to be bitch slapped prior to their throat punch.
So this week, my throat punch is to Robyn Lawley for creating this beautiful line of swimwear only to ruin it by caving to the man and labeling a size 8 as plus sized and to our society who thinks it’s acceptable to label clothing in a size 8 as plus sized and worse still to make women feel like their worth is defined by the size of their pants, how much they eat and what size everyone else deems is acceptable. We live in a society where people feel like they can freely comment on other people’s size, shape and how they look. When did it become okay to insult people just because you don’t like the way they look? This is bullshit. Stop letting the media and fashion houses fuck our daughters up! Give them the chance to love themselves before society teaches them to hate their body.
Instead of all of us trying to starve ourselves to fit the fashion industry and Hollywood’s idea of beautiful, why not make them make clothes that fit all of us without shaming us? After all, they work for us. We buy the clothes that pay their bills and make them famous. It is not the other way around. If we refuse to accept their standards and bend to their will, if they want to stay in business they will need to meet our needs. Who the fuck made them the boss of our world?
Rage against this mind-set for your daughters and your granddaughters. If today’s fashion designers can’t be inclusive, then maybe it’s time for a change in designers not in us.
What do you think of a Robyn Lawley being considered plus size and worse having a line that labels size 8 plus sized?
Photo
2013/07/11