How scrambled eggs made my marriage sexy again or as I like to say, the truest marriage story ever told.
Marriage is different for every single couple. We all have these preconceived notions of what a marriage should look like based on what we experienced within in our own family. On top of that, we all view love from the perspective of our love language; and apparently most of us don’t speak the same language.
For me, my parents’ marriage looked like two people who loved each other, except for when they didn’t. There was a lot of physical attraction and affection but there were definite gender roles. There was no shortage of PDA in our house but they were not equals.
In their marriage, they were not equals and neither spoke the other’s love language.
My dad was in charge and my mom was slightly above the children in her social standing within the family. He took care of her and she liked that but the price of being taken care of was being treated like a dependent instead of a partner. I knew then that was not what I wanted out of a marriage. What I wanted was a strong man who could handle a strong woman. I wanted us to be in life together.
My dad took care of the outside things like going to a job and providing for us, barbecuing, taking care of the cars and the lawn. My mom took care of everything inside the house, including the six children and all the household chores, grocery shopping, kissing booboos and cooking. Never did the two roles meet. That’s not how my marriage is.at.all.
My marriage is equal.
Our marriage is one of partners. I know everybody says it, but my husband really has been my best friend since college. We do what we are good at. Sometimes we do fall into those traditional roles. My dad taught me how to change the oil and my tires but I haven’t since I met my husband. I used to mow the lawn but my husband does to so mostly, I let him do it. Of course, I don’t see anyone fist fighting the cleaning fairy to do the dishes up in this mother but if I ask, the Big Guy always jumps in and loads the dishwasher. And the man is a clothes washing beast on the weekends. Folding? No, that’s another story.
But overall we both do whatever needs to be done. But I do work from home so it’s always just been assumed, by both of us, that I will do the drop offs, pick-ups and volunteering. I pack the lunches and make most of the meals. Though he is always willing to make dinner on the weekends and any night the girls and I are stuck late at ballet. To be honest, he is a much better cook than me.
My husband is pretty freaking awesome. I mean he’s married to me and he’s never asked me to be anything less than who I am and believe me, I am a handful. He’s my biggest cheerleader and my partner in this crime we call parenting. But he did something the other morning that took him to a next level. Yes, the man just leveled up on his husband game. I didn’t even think it was possible. I mean, if you ever talk to my mom she will tell you, he is a damn good man. Seems, the Big Guy is fluent in my love language. He might not speak Spanish, but he is a native speaker in Debi.
In one small chore for husbands, one giant leap for husband-kind he became the sexiest man alive over breakfast on Tuesday. He did something so small but so huge that I can’t believe every husband hasn’t offered to do it. If they only knew the benefits they would reap, there would be an epidemic of feminist men.
Firstly, let me preface this by saying that last week, out of the blue for the first time in 7 years of having children in school, he offered to start dropping the girls at school on the regular. He does it when I need him to but he offered to do it daily. For no reason.
This act of service instantly spoke to my love language.
First, I was shocked. Then I assumed that he must be having an affair and then I was so giddy to know that he was going to get them to school that I convinced myself I could forgive the affair. ( Babe, if you are reading this….I’m just kidding, you know the rules.) That means I no longer have to argue with them about being late (they don’t pull that shit with him), I don’t stress out for the first hour of my day AND I gained an extra hour to my day. It’s brilliant and I’m not going to lie, he got my juices flowing with this out of the blue act of kindness.
I mean, he’s thoughtful and sweet and caring and all those other things but he’s human. Both of us always consider the other one but no one is going out of their way to eliminate the normal day-to-day minutia.
Then, on Tuesday, he blew my mind. He got up, already going to give them a ride to school, and he made them breakfast. BOOM! What? I almost fell over dead because I didn’t even ask him to do it. There he was, like a freaking sexy angel, making the girls scrambled eggs. That eliminated the, “What do you want for breakfast” headache, leaving me with only the, “What do you want for lunch,” struggle. I didn’t think it was possible to fall deeper in love with this man but I did. Not going to lie, it took everything in my body, not to throw him on the counter and take him right there. Anyways, apparently, scrambling eggs for kids gets my motor running these days. Remember when it was a nice ass and abs?
Anyways, that ignited something in me and my husband has gone from regular, old “I love you” sexy to hottest mother effer on the planet. I’ve spent all day the last two days trying to figure out how to kick things up to carnival ride status in the bedroom because him making scrambled eggs, more importantly alleviating the need for me to do so, has just made me want to rock his world. His love language is physical touch.
Now, if I could just get the girls to stay out of our bed maybe I could thank him properly for those scrambled eggs.
22 comments
LOL I feel the same because I hate eggs. I hate the smell! I hate the look of them. So if I don’t have to make them YAY!!! BLECH eggs. But I digress. I’m CFBC and I became a stepmom when I married my husband. It’s a whole other ball of wax taking care of kids who you meet when they’re old enough to understand your dad’s new wife 1800 miles away…then you move to be near them and that’s a whole OTHER new ball of wax. When my husband does things to make the transition easier it literally melts me into a puddle. I don’t think he fully gets it, but when I know he has my back without having to say it – yep. That’s winning right there, folks. The little things truly are the big things.
Oh, I feel you.I feel that way about deli ham and it’s the only thing my youngest every wants for dinner. It’s the grossest thing but I make it for her because she loves it, even though it makes me want to barf.
Wow, you sound like you have your hands full but it sounds like you have a great husband who is helping you through it. It must be hard with being the step mom but you sound like you are doing a great job at it.Sounds like there is a lot of love there for those children.
Such a fun story. I have to agree if they only knew how much we love them doing those types of things. My husband is awesome also and has always went above and beyond for me too. I really enjoyed reading your post!
Thank you and you sound like you have a good one too.
I absolutely LOVE this! Scrambled eggs for the WIN!!!! I totally think when you have help and the hubs does something to just help out its the most amazing gesture. Get those kids out of the bed and make all those scrambled eggs thanks come true. <3 Such a wonderful post!! The litle things really are the best things! Love this!!
Thanks and you are so right, it was that gesture of going just a little further than he needed to. It really was appreciated on my part. He’s a good man. I got lucky.
It’s so true that the little things can really be the things that make the most impact on our marriages. My husband and I tend to fall into typical gender roles, mostly because that’s what we’re good at. My husband is a welder and a mechanic, and he’s just a manly man, so he tends to do the brawnier jobs around our house. I’m home with the kids, so I get more of the day-to-day stuff. It works well for us, and has caused positive growth in our lives, so it’s just what we do. Though my husband does cook sometimes. And I sometimes mow the lawn 🙂
The last time I mowed the lawn, I backed over a tree root and fell on my butt. I got all bruised and bloody. Needless to say, I don’t offer as often anymore 🙂 Don’t you love when they cook? It’s so nice to nto have to do it.
This is a funny post. I did not know that scrambled eggs could be used as an aphrodisiac. I guess I am going to have to try it. Honey how about some eggs in the morning.
Me neither but apparently they are.I am surprised as anyone. All it took was a little extra help with the kids in the morning and he was the sexiest thing alive.
I seriously just lost it while reading this! When I first read your title, I had to do a double take and read it again. Going through the post, I kept thinking what in the world does tis have to do with scrambled eggs and sex?! LOL Now I get it!
Girl, I asked myself the same thing…what in the world does scrambled eggs have to do with sex but it does. LOL. It made a big difference in my mood.
I’m a single mom and ave been for 5.5 years (my son is a bit over 6). With that being said, I would totally LOVE anyone who volunteered to do even one of those daily things. So I understand, lol. Go hubby!
I have never been a single mom but my husband did live out of state for 2 years for a job when the girls were toddlers and it was exhausting. I am always in awe of you moms who do it on your own. My husband lives in the same state and house now but things get so crazy, I still appreciate any extra help. It means so much.
It is the little things that make a relationship stronger especially when you have been in a relationship for years. Anytime I am able to get help with the kids or not have to do something for a day it sends me over the top. Thanks for sharing your fun story with us. Sounds like you have a keeper.
I never realized that him making scrambled eggs could mean so much. It really made me look at him differently. Like he was seriously the sexiest thing alive that day 😉
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