Tomatoes and Broken Toes

tornados, tornadoes, tornado warning, tomatoesSo, as many of you have noticed, I have been very lucky this summer to partner with some wicked awesome brands and share some great products and even do a couple really amazing giveaways that I thought you’d all enjoy. I love doing that occasionally but at the same time, I want to apologize if it’s been too much consecutively so I really wanted to write a post that was for nothing but me…and you. God, I miss you guys a lot. Crazy effin summer is out of control, even by my standards.

Time to share a funny story, well; I guess that all depends on your perspective. Last week, we had a pretty crazy tornado warning. We live in the Midwest so we take this kind of shit pretty seriously. We don’t mess around with tornadoes or tomatoes as my 6-year-old calls them. You know that same crazy adorable kid who calls wiener dogs ..”CORN DOGS”. I will pause so you can laugh. Go ahead. I do every.single.time she says it. It’s so effing cute I cannot stand it. I never correct her and I never will. Never!

Anyways on that particular night, I had given the girls a melatonin (Don’t judge me! That day was even more cray-cray than that night) and they had just fallen asleep. My sister was in town with her toddler and he had just gone down and it was time for some girl time, gabbing and a good movie. Two of my brothers had come over so it was about to be a full on Cruz kid sleepover, minus two (yeah we are a really big family of Mexibillys).

Anyways, just as I kissed my corn dog kid on the forehead and tried to creep out of her room, the fucking Wizard of Oz warning sirens went off. My brother went into Alpha male mode (my husband was in Cali sending me weather reports and telling me to get the kids to the downstairs half-bath).

As I’m creeping out of the girl’s room, my brother is running up the stairs shouting drill sergeant style to get the kids and get to the first floor. I tried to shush him but it was too late. The kids were discombobulated, half awake and crying about the tomato headed for us. FUCK!!!!! My visibly irritated sister grabs her startled, crying toddler, I grab the 6-year-old screaming, “Tomato, Tomato!” in and out of consciousness and my brother grabbed the lanky 8-year-old who was 70 pounds of solid dead weight.

As we are all running down the stairs like we’re in a fucking war zone or some sort of nuclear war drill, headed for the half-bath to see just how many Mexibillys and their kids could fit into it, this here clumsy lady stepped, missed the 3 bottom steps and broke my fucking pinky toe. No worries, I didn’t drop the kid nor did she wake all the way up. But I learned the hard way how much damage over 200 pounds falling on one little pinky toe can do? A LOT!!! Ouch! Honestly, I am surprised it wasn’t crushed into dust under the weight of the two of us. Poor stupid pinky toe.

Moral of the story, the Tomato never touched down, I did the Tebow at the bottom of my stairs without dropping or waking a child to my brothers’ amusement (P.S. I fucking ROCK!), my toe looks like it has hypothermia and just might fall off and you can fit 4 full-sized, grown Mexibillies, 2 half-asleep children, a crying, pissed off toddler and one bulldog in heat in my half-bath.

How was your week?

P.S. Who’s going to BlogHer because I want to meet you!!!!

Related Posts

Comments (12)

I’m going to quickly use your own really simply syndication once i are unable to to find ones e-mail registration web page link or perhaps e-newsletter company. Accomplish you may have virtually any? Nicely permit me to identify making sure that I could simply just subscribe. Many thanks.

Yep, we’ve had two false tomato warnings in the last two weeks… always at bedtime. Always. Hope your toe is okay!

Jessica,
THe toe is pretty dinged up and still sore but thank God the tomato didn’t touch down and all is well:) Always at bedtime, why is that????:)

Oh dear. I hate tomato warnings!

(And I’ll finally meet you at BlogHer!!)

woohoo! We’ll have to swap numbers so we can meet up for hugs and cocktails:) We need a group meet up there are so many wonderful ladies that I want to meet.

BAHAHA! This had me cracking up, totally picturing the entire scene. I bet it was complete chaos!! I had no idea you were in the midwest (I’m in KS).

Thank you for this… because I always wondered how many mexibilly’s would fit into a half-bath.
Can’t wait to squeeze you at BlogHer!

I am so impressed with your stair skills despite the accident and I predict your tie will be okay. Crap I would hate those Tomato warnings at bedtime! We get hurricanes here in the Carolinas and to make ourselves feel better they invented a drink that will knock you on your ass and has caused more than a few broken toes I am sure called, of course, the hurricane.

I don’t think I will make it to BlogHer this year with all the travel we are doing but man we must hug sometime!

I love the hurricane. The best ones I;ve had have been from PAt OBriens in NOLA! I used to live in the Carolinas but not on the coast. I was in GReensboro for 3 years. Loved it.
Damn, I wish you were going to be at BlogHer. We definitely must hug. Will you be at Type A? Hugs then?:)

[…] over but maybe I just need to lean back a little bit; put up my feet and enjoy life for a minute.Enjoy my children while they are children. I can’t enjoy my life if I spend every second of it fighting the system and fighting […]

[…] or those instances when we all find ourselves hiding in the basement from a Midwestern tornado or tomato as my 7-year-old calls them sighting that . I love a good rainy day or night during the summer. It gives me time inside with […]

[…] or those instances when we all find ourselves hiding in the basement from a Midwestern tornado or tomato as my 7-year-old calls them sighting that . I love a good rainy day or night during the summer. It gives me time inside with […]

Leave a comment