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  • How My Mental Illness Manifests as a Teen in 2022

    How My Mental Illness Manifests as a Teen in 2022

    Estimated reading time: 7 minutes

    Hi, my name is Bella and I’m new here at The TRUTH about Motherhood. Well, not really new, since you’ve all watched me grow up on this blog but this is the first post that I’m writing for the blog. It’s a bit personal but, after all, I am my mother’s daughter. Really, would you expect anything less than a complete overshare? Today, I’m sharing how my mental illness manifests as a teen in 2022. Be gentle, it’s my first time.

    As a teen girl struggling in the world pre and post-COVID, well we have not really made it to post-COVID yet, things have been tough. The pandemic has affected me and my mental health. I’ve suffered from anxiety since I was about 10-years-old and it got progressively worse throughout middle school and high school. My freshman year of high school started in August of 2019, coincidentally, I suffered one of my worst panic attacks ever on the first day of freshman orientation.

    As you can see where this tragic timeline is going as there was a series of very unfortunate events approaching. By March of 2020, my quinceanera was approaching and so was the Billie Eilish concert, which was a Christmas present for my 15th birthday, and it was all about to blow up in my face. My quince was canceled 2 days before the event ( after years of planning) and so was the concert all because of this thing called COVID-19. I really hate coronavirus.

    This is how my mental illness manifests as a teen in 2022

    It all started Friday, March 13th, which should have been a major red flag. Nothing good ever happens on Friday the 13th. My parents pulled me out of school early and told me to bring home all of my stuff. Second red flag. I was like alright I’m about to get a long Spring Break, then all hell broke loose. By Saturday, March 14th, the whole world was on lockdown. Stay inside, don’t leave the house type of shit, and me and my sister were dumb and like “Yay no school for a couple of weeks!” Then, 2 weeks turned into a couple of months and finishing the school year via eLearning because nobody, especially the schools, knew what the hell to do. Long story short, kids don’t get excited about unexpected “vacations” from school because it’s not going to be as awesome as you thought it was.

    Since that tragic freshman year, I’ve spent all of my sophomore year navigating what my school referred to as “mode 3”, which basically meant I was home every day, not going into school, doing a combo of TEAMS meetings and assignments online, essentially teaching myself subjects like genetics and geometry. That was fun. No, it wasn’t. If you thought I had depression and anxiety pre-covid, you ain’t seen nothing yet.

    I won’t lie, some of my teachers weren’t very understanding of the whole online thing and they couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t just come into school and wear a mask like everyone else. Well, the thing is my dad has underlying conditions and my mom is a diabetic. So for me, my education was an unnecessary risk to the people I love. If I had to choose between my mom and dad not dying and not struggling with school, I’d always choose my mom and dad. Not going to lie, last year was really effin hard. But, soon enough the school year was over and I was finally free of online school.

    However, throughout this whole time obviously, my family believed in wearing masks, getting vaccinated and staying home as much as possible. We only went out when absolutely necessary. My parents mobile ordered our groceries and picked them up and everything else we needed, we had shipped to the house. We didn’t travel or get to do any of the normal things people do for 17 months. Honestly, things are still not back to normal and I hate it.

    As a teen during this time, missing my friends and family, there was also a lot of anxiety about going back into the real world because I couldn’t help thinking that I could get this virus and potentially kill those closest to me. Basically, my whole high school experience has been stolen from me. No proms, formals, homecoming, football games and no hanging with friends, sleepovers or boyfriends. You can’t do normal things when you can’t even be around people in person. It was like life was called on account of covid.

    I did what every normal person in the 21st century does, with access to the internet, I fully embraced my shopaholic tendencies, which might be my favorite and most financially damaging coping mechanism. This was how my mental illness manifests as a teen in 2022. I know it’s serious but there is something about filling an online cart that makes me feel better like things are “normal” and that’s all I want to feel.

    The problem is that when you have no other outlet for those feelings of anxiety and depression because you can just feel the vibes are off in the house, and you’ve run out of movies and shows to binge on, the only logical option left to me is to shop online. My top 3 go-to places were Princess Polly, GymShark, and Arie, since then they have somewhat stayed the same, but instead of GymShark I’m drawn to Free People (specifically the movement collection) and Zara is another kryptonite for me.

    Seriously, every time I have money, I want to buy new clothes. I’ve always loved fashion and shopping but the pandemic really made me understand what the term “retail therapy” means. Filling online shopping carts and planning travel are what seem to calm my anxiety.

    I do love procrastinating doing my homework and spending time with my dogs just as much as the average teen, but there is something that is so satisfying about filling a cart of things you like, and hoping you can buy some of it because, well you aren’t traveling, or eating out, or seeing people why not get dressed up pretty and feel like you’re going somewhere, even though you know the only people going to see you in your cute outfits are your parents, your little sister, the dogs and some friends on TikTok. The only way to feel anything was to shop and feel like something was going to make me happy even if it was just a few days while shopping and opening that box when it got to my house. That is if it wasn’t delayed 10,000 times due to the shipping problems COVID caused.

    Since August 2021 and returning to in-person school, where masks are not required, for my junior year of high school, where all we do is talk about SATs and college, my anxiety has kicked into an even higher gear. I can feel those shopping carts calling my name. It has been brought to my attention by my parents that if I want to support this habit, I’ll need to get a job this summer to pay for those carts. I’m not sure I’m quite there yet because a job means being in public and being in public means exposure to cooties and there are not enough carts in the world to be worth that anxiety trigger. Just an FYI, since the start of this nightmare that I’ve had to call life for the last 2 years, I did start therapy, and my therapist is basically my best friend besides my mom. She’s probably the reason I just keep soothingly filling carts and not hitting the buy now button.

    In a couple of months, I’m finally supposed to be having my quinceanera, this time with my baby sister who is now turning 15. I keep waiting for apocalypse part II to happen any day now because that’s just my luck. I’ve got to say, if it happens again, there are not enough shopping carts on the internet or Prozac to make me feel better about it. Here’s wishing us all a very boring and uneventful summer filled with nothing but normal things like beach days and family vacations and a long-awaited quinceanera celebration that’s 2 years past due.

    How have you been taking care of your mental health and dealing with the pandemic?

  • Why You should Visit Universal Islands of Adventure and why you shouldn’t

    Why You should Visit Universal Islands of Adventure and why you shouldn’t

    Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

    We just got back from a quick road trip to Orlando. It was a pretty spontaneous decision, think of it as a red wire blue wire sort of situation where we were all about to die from being trapped in the house for a year and we decided to give Universal another try this time, we chose Universal’s Islands of Adventure. It’s home to themed lands like Jurassic Park, Seuss Landing, Marvel Superhero Island and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.

    The first time we went to Universal was way back in 2012. The girls were too little at that time but we didn’t realize that until we were there. So we spent a lot of money to stand in the rain and watch the gang from Victorious sing some songs on stage, rode 1 ride and went home. It was a bust. This time was definitely more fun for our family.

    We figured the girls were older this time and definitely would love it. And while what we got to do see, ride and do was good it still wasn’t Disney. The thing is Universal and Disney World are completely different kinds of parks and if you’re used to Disney, you’re going into the whole thing with the wrong mentality.  So here’s a quick rundown of why you should go to Universal Islands of Adventure and why you shouldn’t go to Universal Islands of Adventure.

    Why you should visit Universal Islands of Adventure

    ·  Thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies

    Universal Islands of Adventure has some thrilling rides. If you like to go fast and hard when you play, Islands of Adventure are for you. The rides will not disappoint but be prepared to be whirled, twirled, fast and furious and to the extreme. Warning: That Dudley Do Right Rip Saw River ride looks harmless but it is, in fact, Splash mountain on steroids and it is raging. It may be the most fun you’ve ever had getting wet but YOU.WILL.BE. DRENCHED. I suggest bringing either a poncho or an extra set of clothes.

    ·  You love Marvel

    Not going to lie, the Incredible Hulk Coaster and The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman were two of the best rides I’ve ever been on. Did they both almost make me throw up? Yes. Did I love it? Yes! Did I lose my voice screaming from excitement? YES!! If you have kids over 8, they will probably love it.

    ·  You love roller coasters

    Universal has some pretty awesome coasters that will leave you dizzy and discombobulated but screaming for more. If you love roller coasters, Universal Islands of Adventure is for you. Bonus; VelociCoaster is coming June 10th and we saw it being tested and it looks amazing.

    ·  Dr. Seuss makes you happy

    I’ve spent a big chunk of the last 16 years reading Dr. Seuss whether it was to my girls, to my nieces and nephews or to the sweet preschoolers that I taught but I never found the stories to be as beautiful and endearing as I found Seuss area to be. It is bright, colorful and beautiful filled with whimsy and imagination. However, as I mentioned before, Universal is for thrill-seekers and even the carousel and The Cat in the Hat ride seemed to go very fast. I know the area looks like a kid’s playground but it isn’t as tame as it looks. We loved it but I’m not sure how well a toddler would fare.

    ·  Harry Potter fans

    Hogsmeade is like immersing yourself in a Harry Potter book. It is beautiful and if your family are Harry Potter fans, it really brings the story to life. The butterbeer was amazing (we preferred the frozen) and the Ollivanders wand experience was really cool. However, there are only a couple of rides and Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure™ is only available by virtual queue and it is virtually impossible to get a spot. We had a time 3 times and the app booted us out and we lost our reservations. It was very frustrating.

    Why you shouldn’t visit Universal Islands of Adventure

    ·      It expensive

    There is the initial cost of the tickets (1 day/ family of 4/ $579), then if you don’t want to spend all of your time waiting in lines there is the option to purchase express passes ($69) and unlimited express passes ($89), parking ($26), and lockers ( $2 each time you ride something that requires you to put your bag in a locker). That is not including souvenirs, food and drinks. There are definitely more budget-friendly ways to plan your trip. Don’t wait to the lat minute like we did.

    ·      Express pass will make or break your trip

    Unless you love waiting in lines and only being able to fit 4-6 rides in on your visit, you better buy yourself an express pass. It was our first real trip to Islands of Adventure so we didn’t know how any of this worked but now we know. If you are staying in a Universal hotel, which we were not, you do get express passes included in your hotel stay. But as we were not, we spent all day waiting in lines and didn’t get to experience as much of the park as we had hoped. Very disappointing. However, if you are staying at a Universal Resort express pass is included so I would highly recommend staying on grounds. Resort rooms were very affordable, we just waited too late to book.

    ·      CoVid rules de jour not de facto

    Universal Islands of Adventure does have great guidelines in place for following CoVid safety protocol. However, not everyone was, you still had to scan your finger to enter the park and there wasn’t anyone really enforcing the rules in the lines until you entered a building. Several times, I had to ask people to step back and stay on their 6 ft apart socially distanced marker. That was very frustrating and made me feel anxious because people were invading my personal 6ft apart space.

    In the end, there are more reasons why you should visit than why you shouldn’t. We wanted to love it but it wasn’t what we expected. Maybe it was CoVid? Maybe it was being unprepared? Or maybe we are just Disney people? Either way, we’d love to go back and give Universal another try and check out the VelociCoaster. It looks amazing and I’m sure it will be one more thrilling ride that my girls will fall in love with. Have you been to Universal Islands of Adventure? What is your favorite area? Favorite ride?

  • Middle Class Mom Private School Kid CoVid Problems and Why I Hate Pandemic Parenting

    Middle Class Mom Private School Kid CoVid Problems and Why I Hate Pandemic Parenting

    Estimated reading time: 8 minutes

    Not saying CoVid and this pandemic are issues especially hard for middle class moms with private school kids but not saying it isn’t either. I’ve noticed that, at least from my viewpoint, public schools are doing more to stop the spread. Public schools are funded by the government and are more likely to follow government guidelines and recommendations because they are cognizant that not doing so can end in losing funding. Private schools on the other hand are funded by donors, usually wealthy alumni who gift large sums of money, often with “suggestions.” What I’m saying is that if you think super-rich kids are terrible, well, you’ve never experienced their entitled parents firsthand.

    They don’t like to be told what to do. It infringes upon “their freedom” so they will scream white at the top of their lungs while staring directly at a black wall. If you disagree, you are not right, you are obviously blind because you chose to believe your own eyes over what they tell you. This is the situation.

    Middle Class Mom Private School Kid CoVid Problems.

    Science and research show that vaccines, masks and social distancing are the way to end the pandemic. Some people at private schools say none of it exists and refuse to allow their children to follow guidelines for a “political pandemic” created by the liberals to make us all sheeple. After all, this is MURICA! Caught right in the middle of it all, the faculty and administration just trying to do the right thing by humankind without alienating the very people who pay their salaries.

    Omicron is here and making my life more difficult than ever. I hate pandemic parenting because I’m terrified to send my kids to school. Let me start by saying that this whole pandemic has been a lesson in versatility, patience and pushing past fear. It’s enough already. I give. I’ve learned my lesson. I wash my hands religiously, I prioritize people and I live like every day could be my last, because it could be but my breaking point seems to be when I live in a world where others are pretending that none of this is real. People are dying and where I live, people are pretending that nothing is wrong. People are dying and nothing is wrong? Is this logical to anyone reading this? If so, please help it make sense because I can’t and it’s literally making me feel insane.

    At this point, my family has been vaccinated and boostered, except Gabi who will get hers this week as soon as I can get her an appointment. We rarely go anywhere. With Omicron we are actually reverting to our March 2020 hermit lives. We wear masks in public and we social distance when possible. We wash our hands and change our outside clothes. We disinfect everything. In our state, we are in the minority.

    At our daughters’ school, there are no preventative CoVid safety measures in place this year other than CDC guideline quarantining for the minimum 5 days if exposed and showing symptoms. But there is no social distancing or mask policy in place. There is no vaccination requirement. So every day, my rational and intelligent girls who have common sense go to school knowing they are 100% exposed. This is not okay.

    Middle Class Mom Private School Kid CoVid Problems.

    They are under so much stress (as any rational/ thinking person would be) that they have now both developed severe stress and anxiety due to the mishandling of the pandemic. They are kids who should be doing kid things but instead they are worried they are going to die or kill someone else because the adults are dropping the ball. The adults in charge are neither caring or protecting our children from Coronavirus, Delta or Omicron. They’re just seeing how this all plays out and that’s just not working for me anymore.

    The other day I was driving to pick my daughters up from school and the truck ahead of me had a bumper sticker that read, “Unmask Our Kids Now.” In my head I heard, “unhand my mother” or “Free Nelson Mandela” only it wasn’t about saving anyone. In fact, quite the opposite. It basically read, “Societal rules don’t apply to me because I’m a selfish toddler who doesn’t care about anyone else but me and it’s my right to do whatever I want.”

    You see, all over the country, friends of mine are taking their 5-11-year-olds to get their vaccination. In fact, they went on the very first day of eligibility, some of them drove to neighboring cities and even states, just to do their part to help end this pandemic. I’m elated. We took our girls as soon as they were eligible. Now, we’re getting them boostered because that is what all of us should be doing to end this pandemic. Was I nervous about giving my daughters a brand new vaccination? Yes. But I’m more afraid of CoVid and the long-term effects of Coronavirus.

    There are still adults who haven’t gotten 1 shot yet. Y’all should be ashamed. You’d probably jump in the lifeboats ahead of the women and children too, am I right? Come on, this is embarrassing, America. Be a grown-up and do your part. Yes, I know, you don’t believe in CoVid but he believes in you and if you’re just going to live your life like you’re pursuing happiness, Consequences be damned, YOU WILL GET COVID. Regardless if you believe or not.

    Middle Class Mom Private School Kid CoVid Problems.

    So here we are. My daughter has missed 30 days of in-person school. I’d say at least 20 of those days were mandatory quarantines from exposure or from having “symptoms” like coughing or sore throat. I did it because even though they were vaccinated, the rules are in place to protect all of us. Also, the girls have caught a few viruses this year (as expected when reentering public places after 17 months of isolation) and pre-CoVid if my children were sick, I kept them home to protect others from catching it and to let my girls rest and recuperate. But suddenly, CoVid is the only acceptable reason for an absence.

    Here’s where the real frustration comes into play, aside from kids at school chastising those who are vaccinated and/or wearing masks now the administration is questioning whether or not my daughters are “really sick” or just “don’t want to be there” when I call my daughters in sick. This began after we made them aware of the mental health struggles our girls are dealing with (as are most intelligent adults and teens). Talk about minimizing mental health. What else did I expect from a place that literally had a speaker come in and tell the kids that depression is evil and they need to pray away their mental health issues? Look, I’m all for leaning on God for strength when you feel helpless but to make it a character flaw to seek mental health help is something entirely different altogether.

    Honestly, I didn’t write this post to complain about my kids’ school, I’m simply frustrated and exhausted from all of this. My daughter’s been vomiting and nauseous for the past 36 hours. Obviously, I can’t send her into a school like that nor would I send a child who is feeling that terrible into school. I called the attendance office and explained and braced myself for the inevitable call from the school nurse telling us we’d need a negative CoVid test to return, even with being vaccinated and boostered. Can I just mention that we’ve had to get so many CoVid tests in the past 2 years that the pharmacy techs at our local CVS know us by name now? It’s embarrassing. All that aside, I did get the call for the nurse but not before I got the call from the Vice Principal telling me that we “need to have a meeting to discuss her attendance”. It’s the first day of the new semester, what is there to talk about? She.Is. SICK. End of the story.   

    Middle Class Mom Private School Kid CoVid Problems.

    I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. My first priority is to keep my girls healthy, happy and alive. ALIVE. At this point, I’m getting as afraid of their depression and anxiety as I am of CoVid. No child should have to feel so hopeless and helpless. I spend many nights a week reassuring my daughters that we can get through this. Holding them while they cry about what they’ve lost and the normal teen experience that they simply cannot have right now. They are missing normal human connection and being able to attend school safely. Every day they feel under threat and I don’t blame them. So I advocate for them, reassure them, hold them and love them as much and as unconditionally as I can but it’s hard when I’m just as stressed, anxious and depressed as they are.

    Update: Day 2 of vomiting and nausea, they are requiring a doctor’s note or fax saying the doctor doesn’t need to see her in order to excuse the absences. Even the pediatrician is like, it hasn’t even been 48 hours, she’s not dehydrated and she’s not running a fever coming in would be more dangerous than waiting it out. They can’t even do anything for a stomach bug. FML.

    What would you do in my situation? What are you doing to not only protect your family from CoVid Omicron but all the long-term side effects of surviving a pandemic in a world where conspiracy theorists and CoVid deniers pretend nothing is wrong and none of this is real?

  • Back-to-School Truisms

    Back-to-School Truisms

    Back-to-School ; it’s the most wonderful or awful time of year (depending on how old your children are) again.

    Back-to-School

    • Purchasing all the items on the school supply list is like a going scavenger hunt for the holy educational grail. It’s exhausting, exasperating and you will most likely not find the last item on the list.
    • Abruptly dragging kids off the beach to go school clothes shopping is like trying to take a carb starved model away from cake.
    • Trying to wake a kid ( who’s been sleeping in all summer) for school is like trying to lose ten pounds on the chocolate shake diet.

    Back-to-School Truisms

    • Shopping for school uniforms is about as exciting as watching paint dry, for all parties involved.
    • Walking away from your child on the first day of kindergarten is emotionally harder than 13 hours of transition labor.
    • Lunches, do yourself a favor and invest in a bento box, one of those cooling Packit lunch boxes and make lunch for your kid. What they let pass for a healthy lunch these days are NOT what any Mommy in her right senses would consider “nutritious”. A bread stick, grapes and something fried…does not a healthy lunch make.

    • The first time you leave your child with strangers (school, ballet, child care) you will cry and feel overwhelming guilt. You are not a bad Mommy. Guilt is the benchmark of a great Mommy.
    • For the younger sibling of a kindergartener, every morning is like sending the kindergartener off to war and every pick up is like the return from the war…safe and victorious.
    • NOT allowing your child to go on a field trip with 47 five year olds, 2 teachers and no chaperones is not only a good idea, it’s pretty much required for safety.

    Back-to-School;Back to letting go

    • Watching your child struggle in social situations is like watching them try to learn how to walk for the first time. You stand back, see what happens and then you give them gentle nudges in the right direction,if all else fails, you grab them by the hands and show them how it’s done.
    • In all things concerning your child’s well being, trust your mommy gut. It’s not there just for decoration.
    • The first week of school will be exhausting, overwhelming and frustrating. It won’t be a picnic for the kids either.
    • You will take three trips to seven different stores to find that just right sized pair of uniform pants that fit perfectly and don’t look to “uniformy”, only to find out that they are $200 vintage khaki’s that were worn by Marcia Brady on an episode of the Brady Bunch and you can’t afford them anyways.
    • First day of drop off, you can be sure that some uber Mommy will walk right up to you , call you by your name and talk to you like she’s known you forever while you stand there speechless because your brain is fried from the summer sun and you have NO idea who the hell she is..
    • Seeking absolution from your drop off faux pas, you will feel the need to step up your Mommying game.This can cause you to do something foolish, like volunteer for several different committees. DO not do this.Your guilt will pass but those committees will expect you to show up.
    • Back-to-school is more than checklists, new clothes and a new school year. Back-to-school is letting go and growing up. More often than not, Back-to-School will leave you in a pool of snot and tears.

    Back-to-School

  • Savings Catcher will Make Sure that You Always Get the Best Deal

    Savings Catcher will Make Sure that You Always Get the Best Deal

    I have partnered with Walmart to bring you this sponsored post and information about this awesome new program Savings Catcher ; as always, all opinions are my own.

    Back to school has had me steadily spending money; tuition, backpacks, school supplies, clothes, uniforms, gym shoes and don’t even get me started on all the groceries for the school lunches and did I mention, SCHOOL.SUPPLIES??  I know this happens every year but still every year, I get sticker shock.

    It’s not that I don’t want to spend money but there is a thrill I get from finding the deal and saving the difference for family vacations or home renovations. Life is expensive but that doesn’t meant we shouldn’t get to enjoy the finer things in life, right? I’m frugal and always looking for ways to save money so for school supplies, I always hit Walmart first because they usually have the best prices and on those rare occasions that they don’t they will price match so I always know that I am getting the best price when I shop do back-to-school shopping at Walmart. I mean $.25 crayons, how can I beat that? I’ve got two words for you; Savings Catcher!

    What is savings catcher, you ask? Is it like a dreamcatcher but instead of  bad dreams it filters out bad prices? Exactly! Savings Catcher compares your receipt to advertised prices from top stores in your area, and if it finds a lower advertised price, you get the difference on an eGift Card. It started August 4th and now all you have to do is enter your receipt and Walmart does the work for you. No more shopping around town or dragging in all the circulars from all the stores so that you can ad match. No more holding on to your receipts for 14-30 days and running all over town to get your receipt “adjusted” because the $200 lamp you bought yesterday went on sale today. I hate when that happens.

    Basically, this is what happens; you log into www.walmart.com/SavingsCatcher , enter your receipt number from within the last 7 days, Savings catcher checks it and if you there is a better price, you get the difference credited to a gift card. What do you have to lose?

    Savings catcher is awesome and really easy to use. Here is a demo video that shows you how easy it is. https://walmart.box.com/s/fl8fe85r6sfk8w63g9sl I can’t wait to enter my receipt from last week’s back-to-school shopping and see if I earned any credit. What a great, you get the best price and maybe even get to save a little money to buy yourself a little something special.

    Have you tried Walmart’s new Savings Catcher Program yet?

    Photo: RapidEye

  • How to Write a Media Kit for your Blog

    How to Write a Media Kit for your Blog

    What Do You want Your Media Kit to Say about You?

    media kit, how to write a media kit

    How to write Media Kit for your Blog ~ We all want to know where to begin when writing our media kit but it’s one of those secrets of the trade that no one wants to share. On the rare occasion that someone actually gives you feedback, it’s cryptic and vague. I am here to decode it for you.I figured since I already spilled the beans on how to write a Mommy blog and how to navigate Twitter, the next logical step is how to write a media kit for your blog. Above is a screenshot of my current media kit. There are two pages in total. This is page one.I came up with my media kit by doing lots of research on the internet, consulting other ( more experienced) bloggers to look it over and having those people who actually receive sponsorship proposals to give me their honest feedback. I hope this post is helpful to you. If it is, don’t be stingy pass it on to your fellow bloggers and leave me a comment with any questions or suggestions that you might have.

    •  Contact information. For the love of God, make it easy for companies to contact you via your media kit, your blog, etc. If you don’t, do not be surprised when no one contacts you. You can’t pitch companies to work with you or to sponsor you to conferences if you are not even professional enough to make yourself easily accessible on your blog and media kit. They want to know that if they need to reach you, they can. Make it easy. Be accessible.
    • Your blog the Brand. Your blog is a representation of you. Your media kit should reflect your blog’s brand. What message are you trying to send? I would advise using the same color scheme and graphics that emphasize your brand. If someone is familiar with your blog, there should be no mistaking that your media kit is for your blog. I even include a screen shot of my blog within my media kit. Same color scheme, same theme across the board…blog, media kit, business cards, Facebook landing page, Twitter background.
    •  The Right Pitch. An elevator pitch is a short, concise explanation of what you do. What is your blog about? The TRUTH about Motherhood is  a brutally honest, laugh out loud funny, raw account of navigating this new lifestyle that we Mommies find ourselves drowning in after having children. It’s what happens after the “They all live happily ever after” takes place.

    Your Media Kit is Your Online Introduction

    •  What’s Your niche? What’s a Niche? Where do you fit into the grand scheme of your niche? Ask not what the company can do for you but what your blog can do for the company. After you’ve stated your elevator pitch, you can now give an explanation of your blog’s niche (Mommy Blog) , why you are an important part of that niche ( I’ve spent the past three years blogging, building my brand and growing my community), and why you are a good fit with a potential vendor or PR representative ( because I am well respected and known. I am trusted and people know me via my blog. I’m more than a nameless face behind a computer. I have laughed and cried with my community. We’ve consoled one another,cheered one another on and helped one another through difficult wins and losses. We are friends). This is the place to sell your brand. What makes you a better fit than the next blogger? What can you do that is unique?
    • Statistics. When discussing traffic statistics, include the following; total monthly page views, uniques, feed subscribers, new visitors, pages per visit and time on site. I also include my social media reach. This includes my Twitter followers, Klout score ( though after they reconfigured the algorithm, Klout has killed everyone’s score), Facebook Friends/ Fans, Google Page rank and Alexa Traffic. Definitely include your social media reach because even if you only have 300 blog followers but you have 10,000 Twitter followers or 3000 Facebook fans, your reach is far wider than you might think. If you have it, provide a link to your portfolio so potential partners can see that you are diverse and that you reach is even greater. Don’t hide your light under a bushel. Be loud and proud but not obnoxious.
    • Just how influential are you, really? If you don’t feel like your statistics are as high as you would like them to be, focus on your influence and how you reach a specific audience. Include your demographics, especially if your key demographic reflects that of the company you are trying to work with. Your influence isn’t just online. Do you have a large circle of people who you influence in real life? Are you active at your child’s school? Church? The Junior League? Any social groups? Also include awards you’ve received that are relevant to your influence. This exemplifies your reach. Mention it.
    • Advertising Guidelines and Pricing. I don’t put cost information in my media kit but rather have them contact me directly for more information. If you are going to provide specifics, I recommend; What sizes of advertising will you offer (e.g., 125×125, 120×600)? How much does each size ad cost for a week? A month? A year? Will you give discounts for clients who book advertising over several months time? I also provide a laundry list of different ways that we can work together; i.e.

    media kit

    If this was helpful, please share it and since GFC is abandoning us Wordpress blogs in March please consider subscribing via RSS or email.Give the company no excuse to not work with you. Make yourself available and irresistible. If you only have one chance to make a first impression and everyone judges a book by it’s cover, let your media kit be the right cover on the book of your blog.

    Let Your Media Kit Make a Statement

  • Parents who Send Sick Kids to School You’re the Worst

    Parents who Send Sick Kids to School You’re the Worst

    Do not send sick kids to school! I repeat, do not do it! I recently read an article in which a parent was asking that schools police children’s health and punish those parents who send their sick children to school. If you wake up and your kid has a 104 degree temperature or is actively vomiting and diarrheaing all over the house, it’s a pretty good bet that you should keep that kid home. But should the school have the right to take punitive action against the parents?

    I get that parents have jobs and they can’t always get time off. Not every parent is a stay-at-home or even has the opportunity to work from home. My family is very fortunate in this way. I work from home and, if need be, my husband can work from home some days so I follow all the rules. I fully realize that most parents can’t do that and they work to pay for food, shelter and utilities. Sometimes, you just have to send your kid in and pray he doesn’t infect anyone else because, quite frankly, the electric company doesn’t care if your kid is sick and the grocery store doesn’t take I.O.U.s.

    If my girls are running fevers or vomiting, I always keep them home. Furthermore, if they have to stay home, I take them to the pediatrician because we are lucky enough to have insurance. And if they ever have any continued sinus problems resulting from their illness I will take them to a pediatric ent doctor. It’s not always easy, but it’s what has to be done.

    Recently, I was really sick with the flu myself. What I thought was a man cold, because I was being a whiny little girl and complaining about everything, turned out to be the real deal, pull on your big girl panties and prepare to hate your life for the next 7-10 days FLU! The one year we don’t get our flu shots and pow… Right in the kisser.

    The worst part of this whole situation was that my girls were also sick so I couldn’t just rest and recoup, I had to tend to them first and then rest. It was brutal. To make it extra special, the night I felt my absolute worst from the killer headache that accompanies this death flu, 5 minutes after finally drifting off to sleep, my 8-year-old ran into my room screaming my name as she projectile vomited all over my carpeted bedroom. The last thing I wanted to do in the middle of my dying was clean up vomit but that’s what I did.

    For the next four days of my crippling flu journey, the little one feverish and clingy spent every waking and sleeping moment draped over my body, attached to me like some adorable little parasite; killing me softly as I stayed silent; comforting her when all I wanted was solitude and sleep. I didn’t want to be touched or looked at but I had to suck it up.

    To make things worse, when she’s sick she’s kind of mean. She was short and irritable. So was I but I’m the mom. So not only did I get to feel absolutely dreadful, I got to be her punching bag (because who can yell at a sick kid) avoid sleep because of worry and go quietly insane.

    So at the end of last week, just as the antibiotics started to kick in from the compounding situation of walking pneumonia, the Big Guy got sick. Fevers, coughing and achy soreness for everyone.

    By Saturday morning, the oldest had 104-degree temperature. None of us wanted to move and all of us wanted to die. Still, I had not one second to be sick in peace. No moment to curl up under the blankets and wallow to the hum of the humidifier. Not even one lone moment to nurse my scratchy throat in peace.

    Essentially, we had almost 3 weeks of children home. 10 of those days, I was extremely sick myself. I kept my girls home because that is what school policy dictates, that’s what their sick little bodies demanded and it had to be done. None of us liked it. We were all just trying to survive it.

    Then I got a carefully worded letter in the mail, “warning” me about my daughters’ absences. The ones they had missed due to the flu they caught at school. The same absences, which I had taken them to the pediatrician for and called daily to let the school know. I felt threatened and appalled because if the other parents had kept their kids home when they were running the fevers, maybe my entire family could have avoided 3 weeks worth of missed school, ballet, gymnastics, violin and tumbling. Maybe I could have saved all that money I had to waste on OTC drugs, doctors visits, prescriptions, Kleenex, and takeout because no one felt up to cooking.

    Instead, I got the reprimand for doing the right thing and the parents who knowingly send their kids in sick with fevers, stomach flus and lice are left to go on about their merry ways. I call bullshit.

    I’m Bitter. I did all the right things and I am the one being policed. How is this fair? We need a better system.

    Parents, I know that its not easy and sometimes it might not even be possible but if your child is sick and you knowingly send them in to school, you know better and you should be the one being given the threatening letters, not me.

    What do you think about parents knowingly sending sick kids to school?

     

     

     

     

  • The Different Kinds of Moms You Meet on the First Day of School

    The Different Kinds of Moms You Meet on the First Day of School

    How can it already be the first day of school? This morning my girls went back to school and, honestly, I am not ok with it. Usually, by this point in the summer, I am ready for them to go back to school. We all begin to get a little bored with one another and crave our routine but not today.

    This morning, I wanted to sleep in and cuddle a little longer. I wanted my morning pile in. I wanted brunch and long conversations about nothing. I wanted to watch all the cheesy horror movies and rom coms together. I wanted a few more lazy days of togetherness. I wanted it to be harder for them to go but it wasn’t. It was one of the easiest mornings we’ve ever had.

    We just got back from a relaxing RV beach vacation in Cape Hatteras on Monday. Tuesday, I took the girls to get their new back to school/big girl haircuts and pick up some back to school supplies. Yesterday, we had a lazy girl’s day with grandma and today, I swear my girls aged 3 years since we returned from vacation. I’m not joking, I’m positive Bella grew 2 inches this week because she’s at least 2 inches taller than me now and she wasn’t last week.

    I used to write about wanting to collapse in the kindergarten corridor because all the new moms were doing it. Misery enjoys company and if everyone else is doing it, well, there’s no shame in assuming the fetal position and sobbing like a baby.  Then I moved on to doing a sort of ninja warrior sprint through the kindergarten hallway to get to my slightly older girls’ classrooms.

    READ ALSO: Why 3rd Grade Sucks and I prefer the Weeping Mothers of K-2

    By last year, I was cocky. I wasn’t crying. I was thrilled about the sound of silence that fills an empty house. I even brazenly walked my girls, right past those collapsed moms, stepping over the one by one, chest puffed out as I walked my girls to the middle school corridor. I walked them into their classes and kissed them just because I could. I knew they wanted to run rather than let the other kids see but unfortunately for them, years of being the cool room mom have made my presence always acknowledged by the kids.

    But this morning, my big girls with their long legs and new hairstyles didn’t need me to walk them in. There was no box full of Kleenex and disinfectant wipes to use as an excuse so I dropped them in the drop off line like all the other parents. Both of them in the middle school corridor this year.

    I would have been fine except the Big Guy, who obviously hates me when he kissed us each goodbye this morning told the girls to have a great first day. Bella, my eighth grader, said, “Nah, it’s going to be boring.” because that’s what eighth graders do because they are actually too cool for school. To which my brilliant and cruel husband responded, “Well, enjoy it kiddo because next year it’s off to high school for you.” Then, he left and I fell down dead. He killed me and I’m sure he didn’t think twice or even realize that I am wounded.

    READ ALSO: The First Day of Kindergarten

    So instead of dropping my girls off this morning and doing my happy dance for uninterrupted work time and no more background noise of tween/teen bickering, I dropped my girls off with a swift kiss and an I love you. I think my voice may have even cracked as I swallowed hard to compose myself. I don’t think they even noticed and that’s what I want. Independent, happy young ladies who face every new day and challenge like it’s an adventure. I let go and it freaking hurt. Hey, what’s going on? This isn’t kindergarten.

    I won’t lie, I thought of pulling into the primary parking lot and taking a stroll into the kindergarten corridor to be among my people this morning because I could have used a good fetal position ugly cry. The girls would have never known. Instead, I came home and wrote a sad post about letting go when you don’t want to and holding on for as long as you can. But eventually, we all have to let go. And damn it, next year there’s high school. I wonder if they have a secret freshman mom hallway where I can ugly cry? Well, you know me, where there’s a will there’s a way. If there isn’t one, I’ll make one.

    Happy first day of school moms.

    Whether you are celebrating or sobbing, you’re doing it right and don’t get too cocky, motherhood is not a straight line. There is an unexpected ebb and flow to it. Some days you are on top of the world and other days, you are in desperate need of life’s kindergarten corridors.

  • Parents Guide to Surviving Back-to-School Induced Mood Whiplash

    Parents Guide to Surviving Back-to-School Induced Mood Whiplash

    The first day back-to-school is today and yesterday my girls lost their minds. I never noticed this phenomenon before. Nerves are to be expected at back-to-school but full-on crazy was never part of the deal! Maybe it’s a tween thing or maybe I’m just noticing it but yesterday was the worst. Forget about my worries of avoiding the kindergarten hallway of death with mother’s strewn on the floor collapsed in puddles of snot and tears. Today, back-to-school can kiss my grits! Now, I know why all the parents in the 3rd-5th-grade hall just carry in paper goods like pack mules and never look back. No photos, no kisses or have a good day, just lots of knowing nods and exhaustion.

    The tween has gone completely bipolar on me (and you know I don’t use this term lightly, takes one to know one and wow! She’s making my head spin) one second she’s smiling and hugging on me, cuddling in for dear life and the next, she is rolling her eyes so hard that I think she might have sprained something and crying, sobbing over boots that she begged for….that I bought. I thought that was a good thing. NO! I was dead freaking wrong because in tween brain that means I bought her stupid boots that she can’t even wear over her pants, with her skirts or until NOVEMBER! I’m such a horrible mom.

    But she asked for them. Tough shit lady, you should have known better. Then she begins sobbing uncontrollably in the middle of the Target. As I’m ready to check out and on the cell phone with my sister, like one of those assholes who doesn’t give a shit about other people’s hearing space, talking her off a ledge about the details of her upcoming wedding, the 10-year-old is throwing a full-on tantrum because I’m not buying all of the volleyball shorts and athletic t-shirts.

    Why am I being so evil? Because I don’t think its pertinent to buy these things when 1) she hasn’t made the team yet 2) we are still trying to figure out how she is going to fit 5 ballet classes, 2 robotics team meetings, violin, cheerleading practice and games and MAYBE volleyball into the schedule. Did I mention that 5th grade is a clusterf*ck? Be afraid, be very afraid. It’s the year of everything and ballet has decided that this is the year that my kid needs to decide to dedicate her life to it. She’s 10!!!!!! But more about that later.

    The 8-year-old has been sneaking into my bed every night for the past 5 days under the guise of a “stomach ache” that mysteriously disappears the moment her head hits my pillow. It’s all  nerves induced by back-to-school. I give her this because I get it but it’s school, not war! And in the past week, I have gotten next to zero accomplished because of making all the moments of summer count and all that jazz. It’s like every year the week before back-to-school, my girls try to climb back into the womb and at 4’8″ and 5’1″, they just don’t fit anymore but that doesn’t stop them from trying.

    Between my children going completely insane, recovering from travel and impending travel, planning a bridal shower, a bachelorette party, being the maid of honor, while squeezing in a press trip, deadlines and oh yeah, did I mention trying to coordinate the most insane extracurricular schedule ever…I am feeling less crying about missing my babies today and more hell, yeah, finally some quiet time to work…in my house…alone…without the white noise of constant girl bickering.

    Don’t get me wrong, I left drop off this year, just like every year before, missing my little girls. But this year, we all need some quiet alone time. The years are rushing by at warp speed and we just need some time to decompress from all the excitement and growing up. It’s stressful but at the same time, it’s exciting for all of us.

    back-to-school, first day of school, nerves, moody judy, parental survival tips

    Is it wrong that I want to throw a one woman dance party followed by complete silence to celebrate back-to-school?

  • Shabby Apple Giveaway~ Two Lucky Winners Will WIN a $100 Gift Certificate

    Shabby Apple Giveaway~ Two Lucky Winners Will WIN a $100 Gift Certificate

    It’s Friday, so I’m giving you some gorgeous fashion via ShabbyApple.com. Many of you know that ShabbyApple.com sells gorgeous, vintage style dresses that are feminine and playful, yet modest and sexy. Believe me, I spend most of my days dressed in uber casual sub par yoga wear so I get pretty excited about clothing that makes me feel like a woman and not a house frau.

    I’ve featured Shabby Apple in the past and I am thrilled to be featuring them again today and giving away a $100 gift certificate provided by ShabbyApple.com to two of my lucky readers so that they purchase their favorite dress. Ladies, conference and wedding season is among us. Who doesn’t want a gorgeous dress to wear, especially one that is not your run of the mill off the rack dress that everyone else might be wearing type?

    The three dresses I chose to highlight today are ones that I own myself; the Belle de jour, Hydrangea and, my absolute favorite, Meant to Be. All three dresses are fully lined which is important to me since I am not 21 anymore and like to keep my goodies veiled in a light lining.

    shabby apple, shabbyapple.com,belle de jour,giveaway, fashion, review, fashion haul

    The Belle de Jour is a beautiful orange cream A-line dress, designed exclusively for Shabby Apple by Kacey Kalmar. It actually looks a little closer to a very soft pumpkin color, which I think is fantastic because it can parlay into a fall dress if you pair it with a light blazer or sweater. The dress is fully pleated. I am not normally a big fan of pleats because I have full hips but these pleats lay pleasantly flat and don’t seem to add any extra width where I least want it. The dress is 100% polyester with a charming attached ribbon and bow detail at the waist that adds just the right amount of fun.

    shabby apple, shabbyapple.com,hydrangea ,giveaway, fashion, review, fashion haul

     

    Kacey Kalmar also designs the Hydrangea dress. It is light hydrangea blue with a ruched waistband, an A-line skirt and is made with 100% cotton so it is very lightweight for warm spring and summer days but weighted enough so that it won’t fly up at the first gust of wind and leave you exposed. I hate when that happens. Hydrangea is made in the USA and machine washable, which is always a plus in my book. I don’t have free time for hand washing these days.

    shabby apple, shabbyapple.com,meant to be,giveaway, fashion, review, fashion haul

    The last dress, Meant to be, is my favorite. It is a Tiffany blue A-line dress with a full skirt and bow detail at natural waist. It is made of Polyester and Spandex with a 100% nylon lace shell. I love the way the lace drapes over the liner; it is very soft (not itchy as some lace can be) and gives you a very feminine silhouette. Bonus: it is machine washable! This dress is absolutely perfect for wearing to a summer wedding. It’s fresh, clean and beautiful.

    shabby apple, shabbyapple.com,twirl,giveaway, fashion, review, fashion haul

    Also, if you are in the market for a swimsuit this summer, ShabbyApple.com has beautiful vintage swimsuits that are sexy without being too revealing, perfect for those of us who want to show a little bit of skin yet keep it classy.  My favorite is the Twirl bathing suit.

    So what is your favorite ShappyApple.com dress? To enter to win one of the two $100 gift certificates just follow the Rafflecopter instructions. The contest will end at midnight next Friday, June 22, 2013. Mandatory entries include leaving a comment telling me your favorite Shabby Apple item and subscribing to The TRUTH about Motherhood , but you are already doing that anyways, right? This contest is open to readers over the age of 18 in the United States. Good luck to you all.

    At the Truth about Motherhood everyone’s a winner so even if you don’t win, here is a discount code for 10% off any ShabbyApple.com dress in their fan favorite section. The code is fanfavorite10off.

     

    a Rafflecopter giveaway

     

    All Photos courtesy of ShabbyApple.com

     

    Disclaimer: ShabbyApple.com has provided me with items to review and giveaway but all thoughts and opinions are all my own.