I’ve got sunshine….on a cloudy day~
And when it’s cold outside, I ‘ve got the month of May~
….I guess you’ll say, What can make me feel this way….
My Girls!!!
Tag: motherhood
In like a Lion; out like a Lamb
Some days it rains. Other days it pours and in between there is always a little bit of the most amazing sunshine; this statement is very appropriate for a Midwestern spring but it is also applicable to Motherhood. I guess it’s safe to say that Motherhood is like a Midwestern spring; beautiful, wet, unexpected, and wonderful…most of the time and other times…wet, soggy, dingy, dirty, and bleak. Or if it is a really special day, you can experience all of it in a given 24 hour period. I am reminded of this for two reasons simultaneously, today it poured rain while the sun poked through occasionally…just to get my hopes up.Much like my 5 year old who fights me tooth and nail at bedtime every single night, but once every week she goes to bed with no argument, no noise, no screaming. Those nights I cherish, just like those bits of hopeful sunshine peeping through the clouds. Or the continuous string of “no”s that fire from my 2 year old’s mouth, no matter what I ask her. But once every so often I get a surprising “Yes, Mama!” Those are my moments of hope. Hope that I survive these days , when the rain feels like a torrential downpour. That I survive having everything I am sucked right out of me. The moments of unconditional love, the little arms “wringing my neck” ( what we refer to in our household as a really good hug:), someone looking at me completely helpless but looking at me like I have the answers to all the world’s mysteries, a sleeping child cuddled next to me, a giggle from the tub, a “Mama, you are my best friend in the world”..these moments of sunshine make all the rain forgotten. Perhaps that is why when I am having such a time trying to wrangle them to bed and I feel like all hope is lost…and my mind is soon to follow….all it takes is a flash of those adorable little smiles and an “I love you Mama!” and all is right with the world! I’m such a sucker.Like spring in the Midwest, what starts out like a Lion..ends up like a Lamb.
Food Revolution: “When you invite people to think, you are inviting revolution”
“When you invite people to think, you are inviting revolution” … Ivana Gabara. Did anyone else see the first , or was it the second episode, in which Jamie shared with the kiddos how chicken nuggets are made? I think he disclaimed it with “this is not how they are made “here” (meaning the U.S) but seeing the ribs and the left over parts going into a food processor has stuck in my brain. I can not get that image out of my mind and I don’t 100% believe his disclaimer. All of this time, like a fool, I have been feeding my kids nuggets like its a healthy alternative but its crap. How did I never understand , before Jamie Oliver’s demonstration, exactly what the hell “rib meat” meant? I had no idea it meant actual ribs were ground up into the nuggets. I was thoroughly disgusted with the whole thing. I can no longer, in good conscience, allow my children to eat processed nuggets. There are a plethora of things they are not allowed to eat and that they are only allowed in very limited quantities, but now one more thing is gone. Not to mention, I, myself, will never be able to eat another nugget again. My new thought process is this, if I can’t recognize what body part or animal the meat comes from; we can’t eat it. Now that I am really thinking it over, seeing as I am a recovering vegetarian, going back to that way of life is not such a bad idea. At least with veggies, everything is recognizable and readily available without going through processing. For now, the girls will be sticking with white meat tenders but I’m not sure how long I can go on this way. I think I need to really start researching our food choices because obviously what I thought could pass for a healthier alternative is not! I even went out and bought Jamie’s new cookbook, I guess that was sort of the point, right?LOL Whatever it takes to make sure my kids are eating healthy foods that are good for them. Fool me once, shame on you…fool me twice, shame on ME!
Jamie’s Food Revolution: Rediscover How to Cook Simple, Delicious, Affordable Meals
Stress incontenince? WTH!!
What ever happened to doctor patient privilege? So, I am talking to the insurance company and they are asking me a few medical questions for the application. The nurse asks me about different conditions that I may have according to my medical history, “So, what about stress incontinence?” “Pardon me?? I am not familiar with that diagnosis or that term?” My God, I thought, was she asking me if I shit myself when I got stressed out? Was that even a ‘thing” a medical condition? If it was, I don’t have it. Never been diagnosed with it; certainly don’t want it! She explained, “It’s when you sneeze and there is a release of a small amount of urine.” “oh, you mean do I tinkle when I sneeze? Yes, occasionally if I sneeze really hard (thanks to my beautiful girls’ enormously gorgeous melons) sometimes I have to do the peepee dance so I don’t tinkle on myself. But its not always.” Come on, I’m not the only Mommy who has had this happen,right? She was really trying to be serious. Next question, “Do you require any treatment for this condition?”
Me: “Oh, you mean other than the peepee dance? Not really, just practicing my kegels!”
Nurse: “Any plans for treatment or corrective surgery in the future?”
Me: “No, its kinda like being ugly. You just have to learn to live with it!” At this point, she did let lose a pretty hefty giggle. And this concluded our interview. I am a little concerned that I am in a chart somewhere as a grown woman who tinkles on herself (just a little bit and just on occasion) but its better than what I had originally thought….One who poops on themselves in stressful situations! My goodness, my Masters degrees never prepared me for that term. Oh, the joys of Motherhood!Random acts of kindness
I’ve been mulling over something that I really want to instill in my children…random acts of kindness. I used to be one of those people who saw the bumper stickers and thought to myself, that’s great but..whatever. I mean really, who has times to run around randomly being kind to one another? And if you do, what do you get out of it? Unappreciative ignorance? That was me, a year ago, sarcastic, jaded, unappreciative me. Today, I am a believer in random acts of kindness.I’m more than a believer , I am a proponent:)
In the past year, my life has changed quite a bit. I have had to put my life in the hands of others and quite literally, be dependent on the kindness of strangers because I had no choice. I was new in town, I was friendless, I was completely out of my element, and what felt like a million miles from everything and everyone I knew. It all started with a Mommy, just like any one of you, who did not know me. We were in a MOPS group I joined. We were talking, first day chit chat, and she knew I was new to town. Asking how I was getting along in a new place, if I’d joined any other activities, etc. In passing, I mentioned that I wanted to join the local Stroller Striders but ,unfortunately, had left my stroller in my house ( we were transitioning, corporate housing and all that). This woman, this complete stranger, offered me one of her strollers. I was floored.What? Was this really happening? Was someone being generous and kind for no obvious reason other than to be a good human being and help a fellow human being out? What? What? What? That evening, that very same evening, she brought me a gently loved Nordic jogging stroller.I was amazed.
Then I met another friend,one of the most amazing women , I have ever met in my life. The kind of woman who at first glance you may think, who is this broad? Seriously, she was so “sweet” I kept thinking, is she crazy or is she for real. I had never met anyone like her, and am pretty sure I never will again. She met me, she put 100%into the friendship, and was a walking ball of random acts of kindness. One day I was feeling under the weather, and for no other reason than the fact that she is an amazing human being, she brought over lunch for my kids. Then dinner for my family that night. My kids were sick, she brought them treats and coloring activities. Random brownies would appear. OH, how we miss those brownies:)LOL These may not sound like big gestures but they were constant, timely, and randomly the kindest thing anyone could do..when I needed them most and expected it the least. This was just a very small amount of what she did for us, what she still does for me. Her kindness parlayed into an amazing sisterhood between the two of us. Because of her random acts of kindness, I now have one of the best friends I could have ever asked for. Her random acts of kindness have inspired me to want to be a better person, and that has to mean something.
Then there was yesterday, my daughter’s preschool teacher (which my daughter no longer attends due to our recent relocation) called us and had the entire class sing Happy Birthday to my 5 year old over her cell phone.This random act of kindness may sound like a very small gesture but to my 5 year old, who has just had to leave all of her amazing friends, school, routine and relocate this meant the world. The joy that gesture made, the effect that simple act of kindness that her teacher , another amazing woman by my standards, had on my daughter.That is something that I can never repay because it is priceless.
These are just a few of the random acts of kindness that I have experienced in the past year; there’s been chocolate for no reason at all, when I’ve needed it most. A hug when I’ve been sad, smiles when I’ve needed a little sunshine,girl talk and martini’s when I needed a breath, shopping and talking..its all about timing. Someone sitting a little longer with me at a gathering because I arrived late, someone giving me tickets to a concert for my kids that I couldn’t have gotten otherwise, there are so many random acts of kindness that I have been the recipient of that there are too many to mention. But if you know me, chances are you have perpetrated a random act of kindness in my direction. Thanks for making me a better person. Random acts of kindness are so special because they are selfless and sometimes someone’s small random act of kindness can mean the world to someone who really needs that kindness and love in their life at that moment. Kindness can never hurt , it can only help! So be amazing, save a life; BE KIND!ADHD, Mommy Specific!
I am having a WTH is going on here day. It has come to my attention, apparently when you have a moment..you realize a lot of not necessarily caring to know information, that I have developed a very peculiar way of cleaning my house. Remember the good old day when you could spend all day cleaning out your closets?Ahh, and when it was done there was sense of accomplishment and pride? Remember? You remember….think hard. Now, it has taken me a month to unpack from a relocation..a month and I am still unpacking. It probably has something to do with what I have noticed myself doing. Every time I say I am going to clean the house, I pick a room(say the bedroom), get started, decide to go to another room for whatever reason (lets say the kitchen to get some coffee),then I am cleaning the kitchen. Next, I hit the bathroom to tinkle from my coffee and (you guessed) get sidetracked and start cleaning the bathroom. Now, have I mentioned that I am moving on without completing a single room and seldom do I even realize what I am doing this until I wander back into the previous room and see my mess that I left behind (i.e mop laying out, vacuum in middle of room, clothes in washer that haven’t made it to the dryer in three days, or perhaps, loaded dishwasher that I forgot to run until I run out of silverware and sippy cups!)You see my problem? I am convinced I have some type of “used uterus” type specific form of ADHD!!!! That has to be it, or I am completely and randomly insane.Anybody else experienced this? If so, is there a group or a special kind of medication that I should be on to remedy this situation? I am getting a little worried for myself:) I mean what if I get sidetracked by a phone call or a doorbell and forget where I put the kids?
This Mommy Brain is gonna kill someone
OK, so just now it came to my attention ,as I actually have 5 minutes to think, that I have not shaved my legs for 3 days because I dropped my Gillette and it shattered into a thousand little pieces.By the way,just a little secret, a Hispanic girl cannot be running around town with no razor because you know what that means…there’s a damn hairy woman on the loose! I’m not being funny. The reason I had no razor, well because I ALWAYS completely forget about what I need from the store because I am trying to remember what everyone else needs..cause I’m a Mom or I have my two little ankle biters (more like hip biters they are getting so tall) in tow.Of course, when they are with me, I am on complete autopilot to my surroundings, except where it concerns their well being. Yeah, don’t make the mistake of trying to talk to me when I’m with them.You will seriously walk away thinking,” That poor “special” Mom, all alone with those kids!”
This Mommy Brain is gonna kill someone
Anyways,so sidetracked, damn Mommy brian brain! The hairy legs got me thinking, this whole “mommy brain syndrome” it could really be dangerous, even more so than me being mistaken for a Sasquatch and being shot by a hunter. Here is a brief list of some (just some) of the things that have endangered my family and myself; washing hands while drying hair ~brushing teeth with diaper cream ~ mistaking my exfoliating mud mask for moisturizer ~ mindlessly plucking gray hairs (can you say bald spot)~ not being able to remember if you took your much needed back medicine, so taking it again( getting really relaxed and pretty useless ..woohoo)~driving while watching the kids in the rear view mirror, as if you can actually stop the cat fight that is going on between a 2 & 4 year old by sheer mind control~ leaving the house forgetting to turn off the iron, flat iron, running water~ forgetting to lock any and all doors when going on a weekend trip (shhhh, don’t tell my husband)~ going out to get the mail in your pjs..only to be locked outside by a 2 year old who doesn’t know how to unlock the door in 20 degree weather ~ same 2 year old locking you out of running car~ forgetting to put a bra on in mad dash to return movies before incurring the late fee~ forgetting to brush your teeth (sorry people)~ forgetting to stand back away from it all, breathe in, exhale and love those crazy little babies for who they are in all their nerve wrecking glory! There is so many more instances of my Mommy brain but if I told you..well, you know what I’d have to do:)
This Mommy Brain is gonna kill someone
Please keep an eye on all of your Mommy friends and let them know there are groups for all of us Mommies with Mommy Brain Syndrome..they are called friends and we can all use a few more and support one another through these trying and dangerous times. Please be safe and Mommy Brain responsibly.Happy Mothering!
Whew, thank God the kids are in bed…Mama needs a pometini!Rehashing all the dangers of my Mommy brain has caused me to have a thirst.
This Mommy Brain is gonna kill someone
If I were…
If I were a month, I’d be May (everything is blooming and warm).
If I were a day of the week, I’d be Friday
If I were a time of day, I’d be the moments before dawn when the birds are singing but it’s still dark outside
If I were a planet, I’d be the moon (mysterious and beautiful)
If I were a sea animal, I’d be a whale
If I were a direction, I’d be east
If I were a piece of furniture, I’d be a big, comfy chair that my children like to snuggle into
If I were a liquid, I’d be iced cold water
If I were a gemstone, I’d be a diamond so I could sparkle and never break
If I were a tree, I’d be a Magnolia
If I were a tool, I’d be a hammer
If I were a flower, I’d be a Gerbera daisy
If I were a kind of weather, I’d be Chesterfield in the fall
If I were a musical instrument, I’d be a guitar
If I were a color, I’d be blue. Blue like the sky on a perfect summer day
If I were an emotion, I’d be the feeling you feel when you kiss the one you love
If I were a fruit, I’d be a strawberry
If I were a sound, I’d be my children’s giggle
If I were an element, I’d be water
If I were a car, I’d be an Astin Martin
If I were a food, I’d be strawberry ice cream
If I were a place, I’d be the ocean
If I were a material, I’d be cotton
If I were a taste, I’d be sweet
If I were a scent, I’d be Viva La Juicy
If I were an object, I’d be a camera
If I were a body part, I’d be the lips
If I were a facial expression, I’d be a big smile
If I were a song, I’d be “Hold You in My Arms” Ray LamOntagne
If I were a pair of shoes, I’d be a really sweet pair of ChoosMothers; No matter how old our children may get, they will always be our “babies’
Today, I had an amazing realization. I used to hate when my Mom or my Mother in Law would call and ask all kinds of questions, or try to tell us what to do, how we should be behaving or spending ( rather saving) our money. It used to drive me crazy, back when I was in my 20’s, before I had my own little precious gems.And now I know, now I understand fully…Now, I also realize I will be 10 times worse! We may be grown up, having our own babies and we think we know everything, but we are still their babies. The same way I still feel like I am 20 (and should look that way too), the same way 10 years pass in the blink of an eye, is the same way my babies will always be my babies. No matter how tall, or old, or big they get…I will always see them through those same rose colored glasses, in those first moments that took my breath and left me gasping for air.It pains me now, at the ripe old ages of 2 and 4 to see them coming for independent. I am proud, of course, but I feel them drifting slowly away from me. I guess that is how it is suppose to be, that is why the teen years are so trying. If they weren’t we would be crying our eyes out and lying in the floor like rumpled towels when they left to college (which I am sure, I still will be…until the transfer, my husband assures me that he sees in our future:) But instead, they hit puberty, turn completely crazy, and this helps ease the pain and instead of holding on for dear life when they leave, we are yelling, “See ya at Thanksgiving, don’t let the door hit ya in the rear:)”But in the end, they are always our children and we are always their Mothers, no matter the age, distance, or time that has passed.
Incapacitated and Dominated; Whack Back Pain Leaving you at the Mercy of your Children
Back Pain ~This morning was a morning to end all mornings. I woke up, in our apartment in Virginia, where we are residing temporarily until we relocate from our home in the Midwest. The morning was progressing normally until the coffee machine, percolating my much needed fuel for the day, decided to explode. As I was texting my friend, back at home, having a great chit chat I heard a gurgle, followed by a distinct sputter, followed by a pop and a long hiss. I turned around, just in time to see my, much needed, life line turn into an eruption of Mt Saint Dunkin Donuts coffee…all over the pristine white cabinets in the corporate housing that my husband’s new company is paying for.
Back Pain is incapacitating
In true “Mommy can do everything” mode without breaking a sweat, I turned quickly, discarded my phone ,mid text,ran for the laundry room and grabbed a towel to soak up the mess and avert any real damage. I was on it, little did I know that in my haste, I had pulled my back. All that animated mad dashing was not tolerated so well by my not yet fully awake body. To add insult to the back injury, the aforementioned towel that I used to throw on the floor to soak up the eruption, it was fully loaded with sand from our weekend beach trip.
Amidst all the chaos that is unfolding, my 4 and 2 year old are eating breakfast and watching cartoons, looking over at me only briefly, as if to say ” That nutty Mommy, there she goes again.That crazy kid is always into something!” Not until midway through cleaning up the mess did I realize that I had pulled my back. While I was soaking up the mess, I was putting the shrapnel of the morning away. As I half heartily set my large, toffee flavored coffee creamer into the fridge ,atop something or other, it came tumbling back at me and crashing onto the floor, where it oozed its contents all over my newly cleaned floor. To be honest, it was more like it was hurled at me by some unforeseen, Mommy hating entity living within the confines of my refrigerator.
Back Pain is violating
When I tried to clean that mess up, that is when my back began to spasm uncontrollably and I could not regain the upright position. As I inched across the kitchen floor, walking in a position that very closely resembled the evolution of man, whimpering and wincing in pain, I called to my eldest to come to my aid. “Bella, help Mommy! Please get another towel and soak up the creamer.” Her response,”Shua Momma,” I don’t know where or how she does it but sometimes she speaks with a distinct Brooklyn accent.What a little angel, I thought to myself.
I make for the bed and lie down, and try to gently stretch the charlie horse that is in my lower back out, but it is refusing to cooperate. In tears, I roll myself out of bed, after all I am home alone with my 4 and 2 year old. I slowly make my way back to the scene of the crime, the girls are back to eating breakfast. I choke down 3 ibuprofen and realize , I am in a strange place and do not have access to my heating pad and my husband won’t be home for about 8 hours so I’m definitely going to need to get some physiotherapy done.
Oh, the humanity! At this point, I realize I am so far beyond being up a creek without a paddle that I am more closely to being in the ocean without a life preserver. I know for sure that I needed to opt for osteopata savona to end this agony.
Back Pain is Humiliating
Up until this point, my girls were behaving pretty well. Then they finished breakfast and realized that I was incapacitated and could not effectively enforce any of my rules;like no running in the house, no writing on each other with marker, no eating snacks like Cheetos and cookies before lunch, no wearing your bathing suits around the house as clothing, no laying every DVD in the house out on the floor as you play hopscotch on them, no yelling every single sentence at the top of your lungs, or no washing your entire body down with the foaming hand soap if you can’t reach the faucet to rinse off. Yes, they realized I could do nothing and they did everything they wanted, and all I could do was watch and cry a little.
I never thought coffee could leave me completely incapacitated and totally dominated and at the mercy of my children. Now that I do, I may have to give it up.That’s a pretty heafty price to pay for a little get up and go! I got no coffee but my morning sure got up and went… straight to hell real fast, taken there by my two ,otherwise, little angels. Lesson learned; apparently when Mommy’s incapacitated (back pain running rampant), there is hell to pay.
