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labor and delivery

Childbirth, labor games, tlc, labor and delivery, pregnancy
Disclosure: This is a compensated post written by me on behalf of TLC and Labor Games, however, all opinions and birth stories are my own.

I’ve been spending a lot of time lately thinking of my journey into motherhood. It probably has something to do with May 1st just passing, my youngest just celebrating her first communion and about to turn 8-years-old in a couple of weeks and Mother’s Day. I’ve had babies on the brain and been a little nostalgic for that new baby smell. Quick someone have a baby and let me hold it. I’ll give it back, I promise. I just need a little something to take the edge off and soothe these twitchy ovaries.

Mother’s Day is right around the corner. There are lists everywhere for the perfect gift to get your mother whether she is high tech or high style but what about the brand new mother? I’m talking the mother who is giving birth? Sure push presents are nice but what if you could earn cash, prizes and all things new baby to help you ease into motherhood just by answering a few questions during labor? Would you do it? Well, there is a brand new game show on TLC premiering tomorrow, May 6, at 10 p.m. EST called, Labor Games.

The premise of the game show is that the host and a small crew show up right in the middle of your labor (during the height of it) to ask you questions and if you answer correctly, you can win prizes and cash including a $10,000 college scholarship for your new baby. Sounds intriguing, right?

I won’t lie; I spent most of the day of both my inducements bored silly. In fact, I remember specifically watching Jerry Springer and rolling my eyes in complete boredom right before all the real fun began in my first labor. When I say fun that would be referring to my completely unmedicated transition labor that came on fast and furious and hit me like a freight train.

The same labor caused me to consider jumping out of the window to stop the pain and left me looking akin to Linda Blair in The Exorcist. You know how some people ugly cry? Well, I am supremely ugly when in labor. My face tells the whole story and from the video, it was a scary trip.

For some reason, I kept refusing to use my breathing techniques, as if I was going to develop an immunity to them or use them all up. On my first labor, knowing nothing about what was going to happen, I refused to get an epidural until I was in full transition labor but by the time the anesthesiologist could get out of surgery and to me, I was fully dilated. From centimeters 7-10, you would not have wanted to ask me any questions because all of the answers would have been the same and they wouldn’t have been appropriate for polite society to hear.

But those first 7 hours of my labor, I would have definitely welcomed the opportunity for some entertainment and some cash because babies cost a lot of money. Of course, we’ll never know because I will not be having any more babies but how much fun will it be to watch this game show, right?

I don’t know about you but I can’t wait to see how this all plays out. I’ll be watching. Will you?

Labor Games Sneak Peek Weds 5/6 10p/9c on TLC.

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love letter to my teen daughter, Bella, teen birthday

They say they call it labor, because it’s a lot of hard work ( which is beyond my comprehension, still how it can take 10-30 hours for a baby to move from your uterus out into the world; after all, it’s not a transatlantic flight). Well, if we’re calling it what it is; let’s call it a near death experience! Giving birth hurts, a lot!

That’s the truth. Thank God we women are so easily distracted by our new shiny object (said newborn), because if it weren’t for that we’d sure be holding a lot of grudges over labor and delivery. Not that I’m bitter about birth, but damn they could have pulled out all of my teeth, all of my hair, and my fingernails and I wouldn’t have noticed because the pain of bringing my dear, sweet glorious angels into this world, was all encompassing.

*Originally posted May 2009, but it just made me giggle this morning and I wanted to share it with you.

I think “Labor” is the most understated term for what actually happens when a woman gives birth.

It is much nearer to the term I used, a near death experience.

It amazes me that myself, or any woman for that matter, would purposely put herself through such physical torture more than once. Before I experienced it myself, I thought maybe it was true;maybe woman did “forget” the pain of giving birth. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I had heard. Maybe those broads were a bunch of wimps. I was not. No, now I know the real story, if it comes down to the choice of going through the pain and being able to hold our child in our arms and not going through it and not having our children, we choose the pain every single time.

My new theory is that labor is in fact just a small preparation for life with a child.  A life peppered with profound moments of bliss and misery. A love so big that it makes us physically ache.

It starts with the physical pain of birthing them, but we feel emotional pain from that moment on.It is literally like our heart is walking around outside of our bodies.The pain of labor for a few hours is minute in contrast to the lifetime of letting go. So cherish the pain, it will be over before you know it and then the real “labor” begins.

And FYI, don’t believe the hype…you will NEVER forget the pain of labor. I can close my eyes, right this second, and be right back in that birthing room, wanting to jump out of the  window to escape the pain.Oh yes, it was THAT bad. And I still did it twice.

What did labor feel like for you?

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