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The TRUTH About Motherhood

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  • Have you ever?

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    I had to post his because I think Pink is brilliant and we all need to throw some glitter in the air![/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

  • Viva Espana; A kiss to build a dream on!

    I think most of the free world was glued to their seats watching the football match between Spain and the Netherlands. I was rooting for Spain, if course, the big guy was rooting for the Netherlands.I suppose it has something to do with our heritage, or perhaps, he just likes to be black to my white; up to my down! In the end, I won! We all know that I am a huge football fan and an even  bigger footballer fan! Aside from the fact that the game itself is strategic, skillful and fast paced, the footballers themselves are awesome. Not only are they fine specimens of the male anatomy, apparently they are sensitive, sexy romantics! Case in Point, Iker Caillas ( Spain’s Hottie King Captain Goalie) and hit equally as smokin girlfriend/reporter, Sara Carbonero.

     [fusion_builder_container hundred_percent=”yes” overflow=”visible”][fusion_builder_row][fusion_builder_column type=”1_1″ background_position=”left top” background_color=”” border_size=”” border_color=”” border_style=”solid” spacing=”yes” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” padding=”” margin_top=”0px” margin_bottom=”0px” class=”” id=”” animation_type=”” animation_speed=”0.3″ animation_direction=”left” hide_on_mobile=”no” center_content=”no” min_height=”none”][youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BAA3mIh6LY]
    dialogue:
    Sara Carbonero: The Royal family leaves, but Iker stays. Ehh … well, look how all began and here we are.
    Iker Casillas: What should i say?
    Sara: Tell me how you are, how do you feel?
    Iker: I´m very happy, cheerful. We deserved this from the beggining. I can only give thanks to the people that supported me always; my parents, my brother, ( almost crying ) —-
    Sara: Don’t worry, let’s talk a little about the match and later we will talk about it, no?
    Iker: to my friends and you.
    Sara: Take a minute to compose yourself, we can talk about that later ,ok?
    Iker:No, this is what I want to do.
    He swept Carbonero into his arms and kissed her on live television.

    Now tell me, what’s not to love about Football? I don’t know about you but I am already looking forward to the 2014 parade of hotties  World Cup 2014 Brazil!  (Vuvuzuelas play in the background:)[/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

  • The Monday Minute 7/12/10

    1. Can you burp the ABC’s?
    Yeah, no way! That is pretty gross, unless you are under the age of 5.

    2. So lets just say you have a 9+ hour drive ahead of you would you consider wearing Depends so you didn’t have to stop multiple times?
    NO, I would never intentionally urinate or defecate on myself and sit in it ..under no circumstances. Well, maybe if I was sitting in a closet while Freddy Krueger or Michael Myers was roaming the room looking for me, but other than that..NO WAY!

    3. Would you rather…run your tongue down five feet of a NYC street or press your tongue into a strangers nostril?
    OK, well these are both equally nauseating but honestly…you’d be more likely if catching something licking someone’s nostril of course you’d probably need a tetanus after running your tongue down 5 feet on NYC street. OF course  if you licked where someone freshly spat or a bum urinated not wearing his Depends, yeah, I say shoot me now! I’m not doing either! TOO NASTY!!!! I’d rather be shot than ingest the cooties!

    4. If you had an envelope that contained the date you would die would you open it?
    Yes, and then I would do every single thing I ever wanted to do knowing I had a predetermined expiration date that I was actually privy too. I could use the kick start to my get up and go. It’s taken me 37 years to finally realize what I want out of my life, and I think knowing an end date would put it into more perspective. Its not the end, its just the end of one journey and the beginning of another.

    5. Which one song describes your sex life best?
    Between the Sheets, The Isley Brothers


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  • Somewhere Over the Rainbow

    I borrowed this video from Juliana @ A Blonde walks into a Blog. Here’s me being hopefully optimistic and spreading the message with a little sunshine instead of a heart full of disgust and hopelessness. Hope this makes us all a little more aware of the depth of humanity at which this situation is affecting us all. I hope it inspires you to make the choice to leave a better world for your children and your children’s children! If you’d like to help make a difference, please click here. Happy Mothering!

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  • “Stinky Old Peopleness”

    So, I just walked out of the shower and was promptly attacked by the overwhelming scent of too much perfume. Apparently, my 2  year old had taken it upon herself to bathe in my Very Irresistible by Givenchy. (Apparently , not so Very Irresistible in large quantities!) Now, I know we all know this familiar scent when someone has put on too much perfume. Either we have done it ourselves out of poor judgment, or had the misfortune of being stuck in a car or a room with someone who obviously has a broke sniffer. (Its usually those same unfortunate women who don’t have mirrors in their houses!) My point is, we’ve all been there. It’s not a nice smell. Before I could reprimand or say anything to my 2 year old, my 5 year old comes waltzing into my bedroom and ( while holding her nose, no less) she very dramatically says, “EWWWWW, MOMMY! Stinky Old PEOPLENESS!” Obviously, I am a little immature and I broke into laughter immediately. I think my judgment is skewed because I am giddy with excitement to see my husband tonight. This out of town business/ single mother during the week crap is for the birds. Then I wondered, how did she relate the two? And how did she come up with that term? She is, after all, only 5. Apparently my snarky little mini me apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. She has ,of late, become quite the expert on Oldies. A couple days ago, my MIL was coming to visit. We had the two days planned full of activities. I was reviewing with the girls and said, “Well, sweetie, we may have to scale back this list of activities. Mommy is getting old!” To which my sweet 5 year old answers, ” NAH, MOMMY, you are NOT OLD. Grandma…now she’s old!” Oye vey, thank God Granny hadn’t arrived yet. This little light of mine…she always lets it shine. I think I’ve come to realize she has inherited Mommy’s filter, or should I say lack there of.


     
    Warning; Image above is wonderful in moderation! In large doses may cause “Stinky Old Peopleness!”

  • Sex Ed for Kindergarteners?

     I saw this on CNN  ( obviously, my new favorite online hot spot  as you can plainly see from my recent posts. I may have a slight CNN addiction. Is there a group for this? A 12 step program?) and I was torn.

    https://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/.element/apps/cvp/3.0/swf/cnn_416x234_embed.swf?context=embed&videoId=world/2010/05/26/ctw.damon.indo.kids.sex.ed.cnn
    CNN* Please stop making the video unavailable! How are my readers supposed to watch this video if you keep removing it?

    First I was taken aback. The sheer sight of these little kids ( because I have a little girl going into Kindergarten next year) playing with these anatomically correct dolls filled me with conflict. On one side, I do not believe in  bull shitting my kids but I think there is a time and place for everything. I think children become curious at different points and are also all ready at different times to know the facts.   From the beginning, my girls have known the anatomically correct names of their genitalia and they know that boys have a penis ( “peanut” as Gabs likes to refer to it as).Bella once asked me how we got her sister out of my belly. I was stumped. I fumbled, but I couldn’t lie because I don’t want to do that with my girls. So, I nonchalantly said she came out of me. Bella: How? ( I’m pretty sure she was going to look for a door or something) Me: She came out through my vagina. Bella: Oh! OK. ( I’m  sure she didn’t completely understand the logistics of it all but she had an answer and that’s all she wanted.) She never asked again and she commenced with playing dress up with her baby dolls. I’m sure that’s not how some people would handle it but it was the best I could do. I wasn’t prepared. She was 3. I talk to my girls about not letting people touch them in their private places, or really anywhere. People need their private space, no one should be in that space unless invited in.  But when I saw this video, though I am straight forward with my kids do I want a teacher handing out dolls with pubic hair and anatomically correct genitalia? I mean, did you see the little girl pushing the baby back up into the dolls uterus? Of course that could have been a useful tool with my conversation with Bella a couple years back. Then you think, well, this is on the other side of he world maybe they need it over there. No danger of my girls meeting the anatomically correct twins anytime soon.
    Then I came across this….

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    Ahh, remember the good old days when you hit 5th grade someone slipped you a pamphlet , scared you shitless with a movie, and gave you a little baggie with some “PADS” in it to take home? Of course, that was as far as it went..my parents didn’t tell me bupkis other than if I did “IT” ( whatever the hell that meant), I’d be shipped off to live with my mean Grandma in Mexico…that is, once they were done beating my ass. Yeah, never really saw the draw in that plus I surely didn’t want to end up living with my mean Grandma in a third world country! The consequences far outweighed the benefits. I guess gone are the days when you could take your kid to the gynecologist and make them believe that every time they had sex they would have to have a pap? True story…I know a woman who did that to her daughter. Sounds cruel…but it would’ve worked on me!Well, I should be in no danger of Bella getting “the dolls” next year, she’s going to Catholic school. I think the closest they get to sex ed is the issuance of the chastity belts at orientation!Basically, I am still torn on the subject….even after talking it out with all of you.What are your thoughts?

    Oh Craptastic! I just realized Gabs is 3 now. Hey, wonder where I can get my hands on one of those dolls![/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

  • There are no words: I am speechless

    Be warned: This story will turn your stomach and may induce uncontrollable rage against the perpetrators of these acts!
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    I came across this on Facebook, brought to my attention by a concerned citizen friend ( apparently I have recently become nominated as defender of the entire child universe.Yeah, I have a cape and everything!) I  promise I don’t go looking for this shit! As of late, it just seems to keep finding me. I think my faith in humanity is really being tested this week. This story truly horrified me. How any parent can abuse and rape their own flesh and blood, I do not know. How a parent can stand idly by as someone else performs such heinous crimes against their baby, I can not fathom. The extent to which these monsters abused this child were excessively cruel and brutal. What could this child of 5 months have possibly done to incite such rage? In the beginning, these assholes received only 18 years, I think they should have gotten the death penalty. To be honest, this happened in 2002 and I hope pray that during their incarceration someone inflicts the same brutality upon them as they did baby Briana! To read the complete story of Baby Briana Lopez, please go here.

    Behold, the people animals douche bags pieces of shit demons who raped and killed a 5 month old!

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  • Fetus Doll~ Precious One

    fetus doll, Virginia, abortion rights

    The Fetus Doll handed Out in a Norfolk, VA Elementary school

    A fetus doll was being handed out to elementary school aged children as an anti-abortion tactic by a teacher in Norfolk,Virginia.

    From the Virginian-Pilot, May 21:

    Plastic human fetus dolls – soft, in pink and brown, and about 4″ long – have been handed out at Oakwood Elementary School [fusion_builder_container hundred_percent=”yes” overflow=”visible”][fusion_builder_row][fusion_builder_column type=”1_1″ background_position=”left top” background_color=”” border_size=”” border_color=”” border_style=”solid” spacing=”yes” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” padding=”” margin_top=”0px” margin_bottom=”0px” class=”” id=”” animation_type=”” animation_speed=”0.3″ animation_direction=”left” hide_on_mobile=”no” center_content=”no” min_height=”none”][Norfolk, VA] by an employee who was put on administrative leave Thursday over the situation….

    The dolls, which were distributed over weeks or months, are not authorized by the division as instructional materials, spokeswoman Elizabeth Thiel Mather said Thursday. Mather said the employee will remain on leave until school officials investigate the reports….
    Principal Sheila Tillett Holas was put on leave today…. The division began its investigation after The Pilot asked school leaders this week about the fetus dolls.
    The distribution of the life-like forms among grade school children shocked and repelled some parents and teachers and School Board members who discussed them in a closed meeting this week.

    Fetus Doll not Appropriate

    Seriously? How can this be allowed? In what way is this acceptable to distribute in an elementary school? This is ridiculous. Students in that age group should not be learning sex ed, little lone about the concept of pregnancy, birth and abortion! I can NOT believe parents didn’t see their kids with this and handle this situation sooner.Weeks? Months? WTH!!! I am flabbergasted. I would have freaked the EFF out if my elementary child came home with this “doll”. Either someone , who has no business doing so, is telling my children about sex and babies or they have effectively given them an inappropriate toy to bring home and left me with the aftermath explanation to a child who is too young to handle the complexity of the concepts involved. CNN, again you have opened my eyes to the atrocities in this world!

    A fetus doll is not an acceptable learning too for an elementary school aged child. Would you allow this to take place in your school? What are your thoughts on the fetus doll?

    Virginia and the Fetus Doll

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  • No Other Love

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    Ok, I promise….No more sap until…TOMORROW![/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

  • Better than Ice cream

    In a couple days, my husband and I will be celebrating our 11th wedding anniversary(we married when we were 19..not really but its the only way the math works if I am perpetually 30) and it has me feeling a little (how shall we say it) romantic! So this is for you baby! Because  for to me, you are better than ice cream. That’s saying a lot considering my love affair with ice cream. I could give up all other food, but not ice cream. Never ice cream!
    [fusion_builder_container hundred_percent=”yes” overflow=”visible”][fusion_builder_row][fusion_builder_column type=”1_1″ background_position=”left top” background_color=”” border_size=”” border_color=”” border_style=”solid” spacing=”yes” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” padding=”” margin_top=”0px” margin_bottom=”0px” class=”” id=”” animation_type=”” animation_speed=”0.3″ animation_direction=”left” hide_on_mobile=”no” center_content=”no” min_height=”none”][youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xY1of3UeV0s][/fusion_builder_column][/fusion_builder_row][/fusion_builder_container]

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