The TRUTH About Motherhood

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Why You Should Always Friend the Older Mom in the Class
I think role model moms should be standard issue to all new moms. Being a mom is hard. It is by far the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Not because of all the work it entails but the sheer force of the all-consuming energy that unconditional love tolls on your mind, body and spirit. Having done it twice, I really think that most of us spend the first four years of of our children’s lives in a fog induced by sheer love meeting complete desperation and exhaustion. I mean, I know I didn’t have a full night’s sleep until year 8 and it was only once.

The thing is when we come up for air from the insanity of new motherhood, we need to look for a mom role model.
I don’t mean someone to emulate or keep up with. Believe you me, I’ve had more than my fair share of those in my parenting lifetime. I’m not even referring to those amazing mom friends who hold your hand and lift your soul when you are neck deep in diaper blowouts, colic and regression. Though those broads are worth their weight in gold, for the listening and nodding agreement alone. If they can offer helpful advice and be a gentle sounding board, bonus.

When I say a role model, I mean a mom you meet who has older kids who are turning out pretty damn good. She might know a thing or two. Sure, she might not have cloth diapered but her oldest just started college and that kid’s got all of his shit together. This mama knows how to get things done the right way. I was fortunate to meet one such amazing woman on my oldest daughter’s first day of kindergarten.

You see, it was my first child and I didn’t want her to go to school all day. I wanted to cherish these final moments together. Plus the kid was still taking naps and who was I to take that away from us. Her sleeping peacefully while I gently stroked her head and silently sobbed because she was leaving me. Looking back now, on the precipice of puberty, I wasn’t wrong.

Anyways, I digress. This other mom, let’s call her Maureen ( because that is her name and she is too awesome for me not to refer to her by her real name), had a little boy who also happened to be only going ½ day. We.were.the.only.2. ( It’s Catholic school, people. Most of these mamas have plenty more and full day it was.) But not us, we wanted our kids home with us.

I walk into the corridor to wait for my daughter and I see this lovely woman, blonde and beautiful. Obviously, she has her shit together. She was not wearing the yoga pants and t-shirt with spit up on it that I was and her hair was so not in a ponytail like mine. We started talking and she was a little teary eyed and all I thought was dear Lord, what are they doing to our children that this obviously seasoned mom was brought to tears by. That’s when she told me that not only was this her youngest child’s first day of kindergarten but her oldest child’s first day of college. You see the irony, first and last and last and first all in the same day. I got a little choked up myself. I just wanted to hug her but I didn’t because that would have made me seem deranged, right ? Well, maybe I did, who can remember, the brain fog was strong with me in those days. Either way, I knew I loved this woman instantly.

Her heart was as big as anything I had ever seen and she was is (she’s not dead or anything) just a really lovely person. She had kind eyes and an unspoken kinship that put me at ease. For once, I felt like I could shut up and listen and not tell the other mother what month of life my child achieved a basic life skill (good thing too because I was getting tired of pulling out those motherhood aces up the sleeve: Bella walked at 10 months and Gabs totally potty trained herself by 18 months. Ok, see that was the last time.)

From that first day, I knew we would be friends and when I met her other children ( she has four) I realized that I wanted to be just like her when I grew up. Her kids are kind, well-mannered, smart, well-rounded citizens of the world. Her kids blow my mind, ergo, her mom skills are the bomb.
Six years later and she is still my mom role model. I hope one day I can be the same for some other new mom because God knows, I am not the youngest mom in the class, ever.
Who is your mom role model?
2016/01/19
Every Morning I drop My Girls off at School I’m Terrified its Our Last Goodbye
My mind has been swirling with all the mass shootings and talk of gun control or should I say, lack thereof? Between Trump, shootings and racists using a burned out van to vilify all the Mexicans, I felt I was due for a Throat Punch Thursday post.
I’ve been spending a lot of time lately feeling nostalgic for my “good old days of blogging.” You remember, the days when I used to stay up to all hours of the night documenting my trials and tribulations of early motherhood after the babies went to sleep? I miss the whole exhausted, cut your wrists, open up a vein and bleed all over your keyboard days.
I miss the days before monetization, SEO and giving a damn who was reading and who I might be offending. I really miss my regular Throat Punch Thursdays so here I am, opening up my veins.
I know sometimes I’m controversial. I know that I’m political and opinionated but I think you come here to read the real truth through my mom goggles not rose-colored bullshit that’s strictly politically correct. Nothing I say should come as a surprise. I’ve never changed my opinion on gun control, ever.
Anyone who has ever met me knows that I am a lot of things but politically correct is not one of them. I have a giant heart with all the feels and not a lick of filter on my words. I’m passionate and I need to write things out to navigate the mucky waters of my mind.
Which brings me to todays rant, first Throat Punch Thursday in awhile, gun control. If you have ever read me before, you know that I believe that there should be stricter gun control. My belief is that people with guns kill people. Guns are not necessary. They were once, when we needed people to readily mobilize into a militia but we are way passed those days.
We live in a world where we’ve had more mass shootings this year than we have days in the year. We are no longer shocked when we hear that there has been another mass shooting, we expect it. We simply hold our breaths until we find out that our loved ones are not within range and then we exhale and pray to make it through another day. It sickens me that this is what it has come to.
Every single morning that I drop my daughters off at school, I kiss them and tell them that I love them. I watch them as they walk into the building. I watch them until they are through all three sets of glass doors and then, as I pull away, I pray that no one shoots them while they are trying to get an education, trying to grow up. I hold my breath every day until they walk back through the door. Every siren makes my heart jump into my mouth. This is what the world has come to.
My daughters have “drills” they do on the regular to learn appropriate protocol for what to do in case a gun wielding “madman” gains access into the building. I pray a lot. The Democrats say we need stricter gone control and the Republicans say we need better mental health. I agree with both.
Honestly, I wish we lived in a world where there were no guns. I hate violence and I think most people who have guns don’t need them. We live in a country where a person dies every 16 minutes from a gun. The scariest part is that people are being shot in places where they should be safe, where people are most vulnerable. No one is expecting to go to church, the movies or school and get shot or die.
Current gun control is not acceptable.
The staggering reality is this, anyone can buy a shotgun and almost anyone can get a handgun by applying for a license and waiting a few days. There are no required classes, training or enforced restrictions on keeping and owning a gun. Simply apply, wait, take your gun home and hope you don’t shoot yourself of your kids don’t find it.
This is what REALLY scares me. I had an actual conversation with someone I know, who appears by all accounts intelligent and worldly. We were having a deep conversation about mental health and a suspected diagnosis. My suggestion was get help; make an appointment, see a psychiatrist to get an accurate diagnosis and a psychologist to talk it all out.
On mental health, I am a firm believer in get help. Screw “what people think”. I’ve been on both sides of it and it’s always better to seek treatment than to try to deal with it on your own. The response I got shocked me, “I’m afraid to see a psychiatrist because if I have an official diagnosis in my record, it may restrict me from being able to purchase a gun in the future. “ It was everything I could do to not let my jaw hit the ground. This is a person who already owns guns and is not a hunter. These guns are for protection but with an undiagnosed, untreated diagnosis his biggest danger to him is himself.
So basically, our gun laws are just making those who might be mentally ill avoid getting treatment because it might interfere with their right to bear arms. Is this really what we want? Mentally ill people ignoring their mental illness so they can have guns in a full on state of crazy? Wouldn’t it just be safer for all of us if there were no guns?
What kind of world do we live in where the mentally ill are so afraid of the stigma of illness that they’d rather be suicidal and a danger to themselves and others than go to a doctor and have to disclose that they got help for a diagnosis? Wouldn’t we rather people be treated and healthy than undiagnosed and on the loose buying guns at will? How did our values get so screwed up? When did we start vilifying sick people? Why do we need so many fucking guns anyway?
I feel like I’m ranting but it’s because I’m mad that this keeps happening. Isn’t this the exact definition of insanity? What is it going to take for people to realize that its time to change our policies? I don’t want to be afraid to send my girls to school. I’m tired of being afraid that every trip to a public place could be our last.
We need more than just thoughts and prayers, we need deeds and actions if we want to make this world a safer, better place for our children to live in. I’m sick and tired of living in a world where every time I see my girls walk away, it could be the last time.
What are your thoughts on gun control, San Bernadino and all of this?
2015/12/03
Nutrisystem is a Lifestyle Change not a Quick Fix
I am so behind; I started writing my Nutrisystem update on Monday and am just now getting around to posting it. Please tell me that I am not the only one who is running her mommy butt off this summer? I thought summer was supposed to be relaxing. My summer is less like a day at the beach and more like a runaway train.Granted the chasing bubbles and chalk art is glorious but damn it, I don’t think that’s going to pay the bills.
My second week on Nutrisystem was completely crazy. My husband was out of town, which means life was chaotic and filled with even more obligations than usual. I spent the entire week running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I am so exhausted. Between all of the running around and keeping the girls entertained, I just couldn’t get anything accomplished. My sister and nephew came into town to visit for a few days. That was awesome but like any disruption to our routine, it threw us into a tailspin. I was really afraid that I was going to fall off my Nutrisystem wagon.
Like any other diet or weight loss program,slips can happen even on Nutrisystem especially when you are running behind and short on time. The difference between success and failure is whether you have a slip and then move past it and get right back on track or if you just give up because of one slip. The key is to never give up.
Thankfully, I stayed pretty close to the straight and narrow this week even amongst all the craziness. My only slip was having a cup of Garrett’s Chicago Mix popcorn that my husband brought me back from Chicago. Thankfully, Garrett’s is nowhere near where I live so the temptation is not there on a regular basis. I’m allowed to have popcorn on Nutrisystem, but I’m pretty sure that doesn’t include cheese and caramel popcorn. So, I slowly enjoyed my popcorn and then I walked an extra ½ hour the next morning and I moved on.
Another evening that could have potentially been a slippery slope of bad eating never happened because of the flexibility of the Nutrisystem program. I was so tired and really wanted nothing more than to just order out, plop my feet up and gab with my little sister but I didn’t do that. I made dinner; chicken nachos with grilled summer squash and zucchini and fresh watermelon. It took about 15 minutes from start to finish.I knew I couldn’t have nachos but I could have a Nutrisystem Chicken and cheese Quesadilla, the grilled veggies and the watermelon. I was even able to have two ounces of the seasoned chicken breasts that I used in the nachos.
It may sound like a weird combination but it was delicious and it let me have dinner with my family. What I mean is I didn’t have to sit there feeling like I was being punished or deprived because really, I was enjoying the same meal with them. This is really helpful to me in staying on plan.
I ended up losing another 1 pound and 8 ounces, bringing my grand total so far to 7.2 pounds in 2 weeks. My weight at Monday’s weigh in was 241.4. I knew this week would be a slow loss after last week’s big number but considering all the disruption to our regular routine, I think I did great and I am proud of myself. I am looking forward to next week.
Bonus: I also lost 2 inches off my arm, 2 inches off my chest, 3 inches off my waist, 3 inches off of my hips and 2 inches off of my thigh for a total of 12 inches in two weeks. That, my friends, is awesome. I can already feel a difference in the way my shorts are fitting. Next week, hopefully I’m back in the 230’s!
Want to join me in losing weight and getting healthy on Nutrisystem? You can join Nutrisystem by calling 1-888-853-4689 or visiting https://www.nutrisystem.com/nsblog
Disclaimer: Nutrisystem is providing my program free of charge for my participation in the Nutrisystem Nation Blogger program but all opinions are honest and my own.

The winner of the EatSmart Digital Nutrition Pro Scale is Daniela Tapia. Congratualtions Daniela! I hope you will enjoy your as much as I enjoy mine. It’s an amazing and invaluable tool to have on your weight loss journey. But don’t worry, I’ll have more great giveaways coming in the future from EatSmart.
Photo: Nutrisystem
2013/06/19
Keeping Your Home Healthy When You Have Pets
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes
Our pets fill our homes and hearts with love and laughter. But they can also fill your home with mud, hair and much worse. This is why its so important that, if you have fur babies in your home, you make an extra effort to keep the place tidy and healthy. Here’s how you can do that:
1. Fight the Fur
First things first, pet hair is more than just a fashion accessory you didn’t ask for on all your clothes. It can clog up your home’s air filters and contribute to allergens around the house. If I’m being honest, our French Mastiff, Stella, sheds so much that sometimes, it looks like there are a bunch of little Stellas running around the house. Regular grooming of your pets can reduce the amount of hair and dander floating around, and a good vacuum designed for pet hair is a must-have.
2. Master the Mud
If you have a dog, chances are you’re familiar with the “joy” of unexpected mud parties. Creating a pet cleaning station near your entryway—a simple setup with towels and paw cleaner—can help prevent your pooch from turning your living room into a mud wrestling ring.
3. Tick Talk
Let’s get serious for a second and talk about ticks. These little critters can be more than just a nuisance; they can be a health hazard to your pets and your family, so you need to know how to spot them and how to get rid of ti cks fast. Regularly check your pets for ticks, especially after they’ve been outside. Invest in reliable tick prevention for your pets, and consider treating your yard with a pet-safe pesticide to reduce the tick population. Remember, it’s always a good season to say ‘no’ to ticks!
4. The Great Scent Cover-up
Pets can bring some unique smells into your home, and we don’t mean freshly baked cookies. While regular baths for your pets can help, sometimes you need a little extra firepower. Natural enzyme cleaners are great for breaking down pet smells instead of just masking them. For a quick fix, baking soda is great for sprinkling on carpets before vacuuming to absorb odors.
5. Emergency Clean Kit
Accidents happen—especially when you have pets. Keep an emergency cleaning kit handy that includes paper towels, disinfectant, and odor removal spray. For those times when Fido mistakes your carpet for the grass, you’ll be prepared to act fast and minimize the damage.
6. Purify Your Air
Pets can contribute to less-than-pristine indoor air quality. An air purifier can do wonders to capture pet dander, pollen, and other allergens, making breathing easier for everyone. Plus, it helps keep your home smelling fresh, so you’re not greeted by eau de dog when you walk in the door.
7. Secure Your Trash
Pets are notorious for their treasure-hunting skills, so it goes without saying they can sniff some pretty exciting (to them) stuff in the trash can. So if you don’t want to come home to stinky garbage all over the kitchen floor, secure your cans with tight-fitting lids to keep Fido out.
Maintaining a healthy home with pets is all about staying one step ahead of the fur, odors, and little surprises, but you can do it!
2024/06/28
5 Ways to Have an Amazing Spring Break on a Budget
Our life is always hectic and spring break is one of those times of year that I prefer to NOT go running off on a family vacation to some place awesome like Disney World because, you know, the rest of the world is doing that. I just want to sleep in and enjoy not having to be anywhere. I want to actually enjoy just being and giving our minds a break.
I like to take the time to relax and enjoy my kids. Granted, we get bored so we need to do more than just sit around staring at one another and it wouldn’t be right to make the kids clean the entire break, ahem, right? Yeah, no. I know it wouldn’t be right.
So here are a few budget friendly ideas for your next spring break.
Indoor camping
There are so many great things you can do just by staying put. We live in the suburbs so first on our list is indoor camping! The girls got an amazing tent, constellation nightlight and sleeping bags from the Land of Nod this Christmas and I know they love camping out. So, one night (or maybe two) this spring break we will pretend we are camping. I will put up the giant tent, lay out the sleeping bags, we will have hot dogs on the grill and s’mores ( in the microwave because it’s snowing today), tell some ghost stories and let our imaginations go wild. This is one of the perks of small children, those imaginations can take you absolutely everywhere without ever leaving the house. The best part is that all play houses and tents are on sale for 20% off through March 23rd.
Local waterpark or hotel
For the last weekend of spring break we are surprising the girls, meeting their cousins and spending a couple days at the Great Wolf Lodge. We’ve never been so we are super excited and by arriving early, staying only one night and leaving late, we are maximizing the fun on a minimal budget. Also, I searched out an awesome discount and that made it even more affordable. We live in the Midwest and unless we drive or fly a few hundred miles south, we’re going to be surrounded by snow and/or wintery weather mix. I hate the cold but if we go to an indoor water it is a balmy 80 degrees. Now, I was not a fan of indoor waterparks until I had children. I prefer the beach but I have found that at the waterparks, it’s always warm and there are so many different slides, pools and activities that no one ever tells me, “I’m BORED!” You may even want to meet up with a group. We are meeting my sisters and their kids and husbands and celebrating a couple cousins’ birthdays while there. We can’t wait! The 7-year-old is marking her calendar. For an added bonus, take Grandma and relax a little. If you want to get out of the house but don’t want the hassle of added cost of a waterpark, you can always just stay at a local hotel with a pool. The kids will love it.
Visit Family or Friends
If you are watching your budget, why not go visit family or friends? You save yourself the cost of a hotel, you get to spend time reconnecting with the people that you love the most and your kids have a blast hanging out in a new city. I’m lucky my family lives in Chicago and it’s only a 3-hour drive, so it’s an easy couple day trip and the city is full of places to go, foods to eat and people to see that my children don’t get to usually do so everyone wins.
Explore Your own City
Whether you live in a big city or a small one, there are always things to do. Check out a new restaurant that you’ve never tried or visit a boutique or shop that you’ve never been into. There are all kinds of hidden gems that most cities have and no one has the time to try new things because we always do what we know because it’s easy. For instance, there is a wonderful art museum right across the street from my daughter’s ballet school. We never go in because we are always going to ballet. During spring break, we are going to check it out and try a new restaurant downtown. If you want to kick it up a notch, get a play date group and do local scavenger hunt in your own city.
Take a vacation from your regular life
If you ask me, the best thing about spring break is not having to be anywhere so why not just relax. Have a pajama movie day. Spend all day coloring in a coloring book with your kids. Have an at home spa day or give each other makeovers. Just do something that you don’t get to do every day like breakfast for dinner or pizza for breakfast. Most of all just try to enjoy your time with your kids because, as I keep reminding myself, they are only little for a little while.
Bonus: We are getting to test drive a Mitsubishi Outlander for the week, so I’ll be completely taking a vacation from my regular life. Can’t wait to tell you all about it.
Disclosure: While all opinions are my own, I was provided product for review purposed from The Land of Nod.
What is your family doing this spring break?

2015/03/22
My Mom, My Hero
This is a compensated post written by me in partnership with Hallmark but my opinions and love expressed for my mom in this post are all mine.
Saying, “I love you” to my mom is second nature to me, like breathing, in the same way that I say it to my daughters, my husband and all the people who mean so very much to me. I don’t think about it. I feel it and I say it. But I’ve never stopped to think about what it means to “love” a parent. It’s just the way it has always been. They give us birth and we love them forever, the same way my daughters love me.
So, I thought about it. Really thought about it. What does my mom mean to me? My mom gave birth to me. She chose to have me, when she was in a situation that she very well could have chosen not to. She chose the hard path because she loved me before she ever met me. I never understood that love until I had my own children. A mother’s love is like no other kind of love because it runs deep and it is never-ending, unwavering and truly unconditional. I get that now.
My mom means everything to me. I take that for granted sometimes. I know that. She’s always been very quiet and humble and I’m loud and a little rough around the edges. When I was younger, I mistook her quiet demeanor for weakness but really; it was fierce strength because sometimes the hardest thing to do is to hold your tongue, especially when you want to shout at the world.
I was a difficult teen. I was angry at the world and my mother took the brunt of my anger. While I was raging and shutting her out, she was strong. She never made me feel small or unheard. She heard me. She may not have liked what I was saying or doing but I always knew that no matter what I did, she would be there when I needed her and she always has been. I was never afraid to go after what I wanted in life because I always knew that if things didn’t work out, she’d still be there to love me and support me.
Because of her, I learned how to be me. We are complete opposites even still to this day but somewhere between my yelling and her silence, there is peace and finally, we are both being heard. She still calls me her little girl and that’s fine to me because to her I will always be that little girl. The same way she will always be “mommy” to me.
What does my mom mean to me?
She means hope for better things. She is living proof that we can survive anything. She is unconditional and forever and without her, I wouldn’t be me. In my darkest moments, my mom has always known when to hold me and when to let me go and regardless if it was what she wanted, she always gave me what I needed because that’s what being a mother is all about.
My mom inspires me to be better, to push myself and always encourages me to follow my heart. She never loses faith in me and no matter how many times I stumble in life, she’s there, carefully watching and waiting while I pick myself back up. She may be quiet and reserved but she is the reason that I am bold. She gave me the strength and support to do that. My mom is everything to me.
It’s ironic that in a world where people share every fleeting thought that comes into their head sometimes we have difficulty saying the most important things to the people who mean the most to us. Hallmark helps us truly connect with those who mean the most to us. Hallmark can help you put your heart to paper.
What does your mom mean to you?
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2015/04/27
Coming Out of the Mom Fog and Catching Up on the Present
I am unbreakable. This is what I tell myself every day. Bendable, certainly but unbreakable. It’s been a crazy week. I’ve been completely and utterly useless. I was at an amazing conference last week but unfortunately, due to jetlag, my brain is fried this week. It’s the price I pay for one amazing conference full of learning. You know how they say beauty is pain? Well, learning is exhausting. I’ve been trying to take all the excitement that I’ve brought back with me and focus it into results.
Then Monday morning, my back went out. I was, literally, flat on my back for most of this week. So I was forced to let my brain and my back rest.
I reminded myself, ” You are unbreakable!”
Obviously, I turned to Netflix. I mean, who doesn’t binge watch House of Cards when they’re jetlagged and immobile? How lucky was I that its debut of season 3 would coincide with my return from Los Angeles and wonky back?
Not going to lie, I’ve not finished yet. Deadlines, ya know? This week I’ve felt like I needed one of those astronaut pens (in laptop form) because I’ve been typing from flat on my back. House of cards has been good so far. Lots of unexpected plot twists and turns and of course, the madness that is the interworking of the twisted mind of the Underwoods.
But today, I turned my attention to Netflix’s latest original series by TINA FEY (how could this not be good!)Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. It is awesome! I don’t want to give too much away but the plot is about Kimmy Schmidt a 20 something from Indiana who has been locked in a bomb bunker for the past 15 years with 3 other women and one crazy preacher under the belief that the apocalypse had happened in 2000. She finds out that her “savior” was actually her kidnapper. The show picks up as Kimmy and the others are rescued and they begin life above ground.
She is definitely unbreakable.
I don’t want to spoil it for anyone but the preacher is someone who you would NOT expect and *Spoiler alert* Tina Fey might make an appearance! I binge watched the entire season in 1 day. I love Netflix but I really have to learn to pace myself. I found this funny, sweet show to be uplifting and inspiring and it made me think, why shouldn’t we live every day like life is new and wonderful?
Kimmy emerging from her 15 years underground reminds me a lot of motherhood. I’ve been a mother for ten years ( on Tuesday) and on some days, I feel like I have been living in a hole for those 10 years; a beautiful, cozy, full of love, void of sleep and regular meals hole but a hole just the same. For the past 10 years, my entire life has selflessly revolved around my two young daughters and that’s okay. It’s everything I ever wanted. I’m proud of that. They truly have made my life better and more purposeful. My priorities have shifted in ways that I couldn’t even have comprehended before I gave birth.
I put my career and my life on hold, to stay home and be their mother because it really is the most important thing that I will ever do. Growing and raising human beings is a miracle and a privilege but it takes your everything, especially when children are young. I willingly give everything. I see the dividends in my daughters, every single day.
But now, the girls are getting older and they don’t need me as much. They can do almost everything menial for themselves. I am only here to guide the way, be their constant source of continued unconditional love and support and their biggest advocate. Suddenly, I’ve found myself with a few hours a day of quiet, personal time. I’m able to attend conferences and travel for work.
It’s like a fog is lifting and while I may not be needed to kiss booboos and scare away things that go bump in the night as often, I am now becoming the example of the kind of woman I want my daughters to look up to as a role model. The fog of exhaustion has lifted and I can clearly see what my purpose in life is and it feels incredible to be able to know something so certainly with such clear perspective. I will always see the world through mom colored glasses, I am a mom but the role is evolving and so must I adapt too.
What has been your biggest defining moment in life so far?
Disclaimer: I am a member of Netflix Streamteam but all love of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and House of Cards are all my own.
2015/03/07
Inaugural Fabulous Five Friday
Good Morning, fine folks of the blogiverse. It’s Friday and I have decided that I would like to start something that I will call “Fabulous Five Friday ” or something to that effect. Basically, what it will be is every Friday I will list 5 blogs of consequence. Blogs that I think you should be following or at the very least check out. Some of my favorite reads. I will be honest, it will most likely be a mix of some that you are already aware of, some that everybody already knows of and a lot that maybe you aren’t familiar with. My purpose for this is that I have discovered some absolutely fabulous reads out there and I think you would probably enjoy, as well. My plan is to help you all find one another and make the world a better place:)
MommyNaniBooBoo “I am Jenni Chiu- most of the time, I give you my heart and soul, tied up in a pretty bow, dipped in poop, and then run through the washer on cold.” Her blog is honest, raw and real. It’s is the perfect blend of brains and beauty. Jenni is witty, wise and snarkilicious and definitely worthy of daily read status. Her blog tag line says it all “Not perfect, just right” isn’t that where we all fall on the spectrum if we are brave enough to admit it. Oh yeah and did I mention? She is HILARIOUS wrapped up in deep dipped in chocolate. She is one of the most genuine people out there on the interwebs. I want to give her proper heart hugs on the regular and so will you.You can also find her on Twitter. Go find her now!
A(n)(Un)Common Family “And while being a mom is a huge part of who I am – the part that changed me in ways nothing else could, that made me get in touch with an inner soft side (one that could actually cry!), the part that suddenly realized what true, unconditional love actually feels like – it’s not all that I am.There’s more to me, even if it’s far less adorable than my kids.” Laura’s blog is about motherhood, marriage and how she has evolved over the years while maintaining the woman she was before the kids. It started with adoption and she touches on just about every single issue a mother or woman can face. She shares her soul and knowledge all with a twist of wicked sense of humor. I love her and so will you. You can also find Laura on Twitter.
Parenting Ad Absurdum “An irreverent, humorous and honest look at what it is truly like to parent small children, the highs and lows, the thrilling parts and the not-so-thrilling-at-all parts.” This blog is written by the lovely Peryl, an awesome Mommy to two spirited young boys. On any day you can read about a variety of topics ranging from little vampires ordering blood off the Starbucks menu to the correct protocol on how to name a Canadian baby. No matter the topic, Peryl will deliver it to you with grace and poise. She’s the lady who has the magic touch and can make any pill easier to swallow.Do yourself a favor, check her out. Peryl can also be found on Twitter
Kludgy Mom “(clue-gee mom) is a mom who uses clumsy or inelegant, yet effective, solutions to problems, typically using items that are cobbled together. In other words, a mom who makes things up as they go. A kludgy mom practices the art of embracing a life lived haphazardly. I’m a kludgy mom.” Gigi is much more than just a Mommy blogger, she is a Mommy who is a blogger. But she also blogs about a lot more. She blogs about food, she blogs about parenting, and she blogs about blogging and social media. She is my go to girl for blogging information because aside from a ridiculously off the map sense of humor, she has a heart of gold and is living proof of one of my biggest dreams. There can, in fact, be sisterhood through motherhood. Sisterhood through blog writing. She rocks my world in loads of ways and she will rock yours too. She can also be found on Twitter.
Madame Paradox “Heidi David is a writer and freelance producer. She is the author of an as yet unpublished work of dark commercial fiction, THE FLYING JEWEL; a tale of a traveling circus where the price of admission is one’s free will. Brought up in a pleasant yet dysfunctional suburb of New York, Heidi’s excessive exposure to musical theater at a young age as well as a lifetime of insomnia have contributed to her peculiar world view. Ms. David has been known to take an occasional tango class as well as repel down cliffs, thus defying the centuries old tradition of nice Jewish girls finding excuses to get out of gym class. When she’s not writing or producing, Heidi lives a gluten-free existence in her Manhattan apartment while pining for the bagels of her youth.” Heidi is a writer’s blogger, meaning if you have a reverence for the written word you absolutely MUST give her blog a look. You won’t be sorry. Her words will take you to the four corners of the world, traveling space and time, she will make you laugh and cry. Heidi will take you to the brink of insanity and then rescue you from yourself. Her posts remind me of why I write. She expands my imagination and stimulates my brain, she can do the same for you. Heidi can also be found on Twitter.
These are my inaugural five blogs. They are all amazing. I think you will love them as much as I do. There are no crazy rules or requirements, I only want to share these great blogs with you. Of course, if you want to add me to your blog roll or put a button on your blog (it can be found under the “buttons” tab) that would certainly be awesome.
If you were looking for me this week, I was all over the internet. In case you missed it; I was techy here and then again over here. It’s a new writing opportunity working with one of the ladies I respect most in the blog world, Jessica Gottlieb. I am super excited and hope that you will stop by and check us out. I was spreading the crazy truth about having a second child and sharing my funny over here. Then I was featured as one of the top 500 over here. Not to mention, giving you the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth with a side of Throat Punch on Thursday here! Happy Friday,my Friends!
2011/04/01
Mom Fail 101
I don’t want to Mom fail these two
The feeling of mom fail is inevitable at some point in motherhood. As a mom, I spend a lot of my time chasing my own tail. I am always trying to catch up. Just when I think I have a handle on this Motherhood gig, the rules change. This is not a complaint. This is a fact.
When my girls are sleeping, I look at them and my breath is taken away from me just by knowing they are mine. I made them. I grew them. They are amazing and that has to be in some small part a reflection of me, right?
On other days, when I just can’t catch up, I feel like a complete failure because it feels hard. We’re brainwashed into believing it’s not supposed to be hard. Then the guilt creeps in because I must be doing something wrong.
Mom Fail hurts
But then there are good moments that prove to me that I am not so bad at this motherhood job; days when I surprise even myself. Days when I feel like I was meant to do this. Days where there is no annoyance or heated reactions to bad behavior. The days that I actually think and breathe before I carry on are good days.
Last weekend, we were unexpectedly whisked out of town. Anyone who has children knows that an unexpected trip has a ripple effect of repercussions that you will be feeling the quake from for weeks to come. This was no exception. We were all exhausted and irritable.
Monday morning came and as I drove up to drop off, one of my worst failures as a mom was realized. It may not sound like much, but if you have a kid that has to wear a uniform to school, you know my pain. I sent my kid to school in her uniform on a dress down day.
We pulled up to see not only had she not worn shorts, after a lengthy discussion that included tears and bitter disappointment and me saying, “ Then just put on your jumper and let’s go. We are going to be late!” I’m certain this sounds familiar to at least some of you.
1^st Mom fail of the morning.
Every kid was not only wearing shorts, they were wearing STREET*CLOTHES!! It was a dress down day. Catholic school kids live for these days. Major mom fail! Ella didn’t complain, she only exited the car. “Mommy, I love you.” and walked into the building, crushed. I felt failure.
I drove her sister to the pre-school and I couldn’t shake the feeling of letting her down. I was also impressed that she didn’t complain, even though I could see it broke her heart. After, dropping her sister off, I drove to the nearest Target (because we live nowhere near her school) and bought her an outfit. I drove back to the school, went to her classroom, took my daughter to the restroom and changed her into her shorts and t-shirt.
She was shocked, surprised and I completely impressed. That’s hard to do to a 7 year old. She was genuinely happy. In that small act, $25 and 15 minutes of my time, I created an unforgettable moment in her life. She will never forget that I took the time and care to make her happy. I will never forget that giant beautiful that she had, just for me. She is always loved and she knows that but sometimes it’s nice to remind them of just how special they are to you.
What’s been your greatest mom fail? How have you turned a mom fail into a mom win?
2012/03/28
Mom Myth #1 Exposed
Mom Myth that we all want to Believe
Mom Myth #1 ~ My Kids are perfect. No they are not. None of our children are perfect. It is a mom myth.You know some bullshit that other mothers perpetuate so that we are not on to them and know that they are struggling with this mothering gig just as mush as the rest of us. They are. Just pay attention; if you look hard enough, there is spit up on her Kate Spade blouse ( why else do you think she is wearing that crazy print?), she may not be wearing yoga pants but look closely, there is spandex in them there jeans or they may even be designer maternity. Sure that loose falling pony is the sexy in thing, but hers was not on purpose the baby was pulling on it this morning and those stunna shades..OMG, that is the universal code for Mommy didn’t get any sleep last night. Of course, we all want to appear to have all of our Mommy shit together. That is why these mom myths exist at all. We think by pretending that our kids are perfect, that makes us perfect mothers. Logically, if they are winners, we are not losers. There is no such thing as a perfect mother and if there is, that bitch is riding a unicorn high as a kite in a tornado.
We need a support group to support one another, not a panel of Judgy McTired Mamas to point out all of our flaws while desperately trying to hide her own. Let’s call it the We’re not perfect, just human’s doing our best club. Who wants to be the newest member? I am the founder and president.
I’ll go first, My name is Debi and my kids are not perfect, that’s a mom myth and I rebuke it.
I am an official Mom Myth buster.
There is an invisible hump located somewhere between the ages of 5 and 7 and the divide is great. As many of you are aware, I have two wonderful little girls, Bella, who is 7 and Gabi, who is 5. They are wonderful, amazing and bright and all that other rainbows and sunshine shit that parents are supposed to say about their children but lately they are becoming increasingly more and more of a pain in my ass. I believe they are wonderful and beautiful because they are mine and I see all they do through Mommy goggles but I also get the privilege and the only right to know and call them out as being assholes on occasion.Yes, I said it, my kids are a pain in my ass.
I know that it’s not politically correct to say that and damn it, I still love them with all the fierceness of a mama bear in drag but it had to be said. They are not perfect, neither am I, they have an asshole streak in them the size of Texas and I just don’t have the patience I need to deal with it on some days. Yes, I am perfectly aware that assholery and asshatery are both genetic and they have probably inherited it from their father or myself, or probably from both. I blame the Big Guy.
This is what has happened. Bella,the 7 year-old, has decided to never tell a lie… to her sister….unless it suits her situation. To the rest of us at home, she has become a down right exaggerating guru. This kid is the Pecos Bill of our house. She doesn’t necessarily lie so much as stretch the truth. I do not like lies. I loathe them and despise liars. It’s a trust thing and if I can’t believe what you say, your word means nothing and that just doesn’t work for me. I can’t have kids who think lying is ok. It’s not. We are working on it. She’s getting better at differentiating between what is real and what is not. She’s on the path of the straight and narrow now, especially when it is most inconvenient.
All that being said, Bella is at the age of reason. Damn you reason. Her little sister is still in that wide-eyed, life is magical phase. Bella and her new found honesty has been a real buzz kill lately.You know those little white lies that we all tell our children, ” oh yes, honey, that is the most beautiful elephant mommy has ever seen drawn!” when what it really looks like is a Picasso and it’s anybody;s guess what it might truly be. It’s all eyeballs and assholes. Well, Bella will come in right behind me and say something like this, ” Ugghh, Gabs, I can’t really even tell what that is!” Sometimes the truth is a little mean and sometimes my kids are pains in the ass and all the time, I love them so damn much that I just don’t care. I don’t need to adhere to some mom myth, I just need to love my children unconditionally…. and pray that Bella figures out that sometimes you can be generous with the truth to spare people’s feelings but I can’t explain that to a 7-year-old.
Do you perpetuate the mom myth or do you simply do your best and not worry about what other people think of your parenting?
Mom Myth #1 Busted Wide Open
photo credit: ^riza^ via photopin cc
2012/10/02