Today, I have the honor of having the fabulously awesome Jessica Gottlieb sharing her TRUTH about motherhood. *Excuse me while I squee. ( Yes, I actually used the word squee but I am just that excited) I’m sure I just lost some cool points with Jessica by making that confession but I don’t care. I must admit I have a little bit of a blogalicious crush on her. She is not only my blogging shero; she is intelligent, funny, witty, wonderful and the queen of snarkilicousness. She is a thinking Mom’s blogger. To top it off, she is the most honest, real, down to earth woman/writer that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. She hardly needs an introduction but in case you are new to blogging or live in a little social media vacuum, Jessica is the brilliant author of www.JessicaGottlieb.com and you can also find her on Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, Momversation.com,www.tehuser.com and just about any place else that you might expect the grand dame of Mommy blogging to be found. But today, I am excited to say that she can also be found on the TRUTH about Motherhood. Thank you so much for sharing your TRUTH about motherhood with us!
The Truth About Motherhood is that You Lie A lot
Mothers are liars. Our children are weaned on lies. I learned to lie in my teens when my mother asked me where I was going. Nowhere. Who is going nowhere with you? No one. Are you smoking cigarettes? Absolutely not. I know you’re smoking pot. No mom.
So we learned in our teens to hide our boyfriends, our vices, and our nights out. I learned to hide my questionable grades and I learned how to cram and get myself out of trouble, well, most of the time.
I learned how to keep secrets, and little did I know how much I would need that skill in motherhood.
I can’t tell my children everything I think, I’m a mother for heavens’ sake. I would never tell them how utterly unprepared for motherhood I feel. I would never tell them that there are parts of school that really don’t matter. I tell my kids that they can be good at things that we both know they’re unlikely to excel at.
I told them about the toothfairy and Mr G told them they were bought at Babies R Us on a rare snowy nights. The snow made his hair grey.
I have told my children that you don’t have sleepovers with the opposite sex until you’re married, and I know I’m doomed because my brother has lived with his girlfriend for sixteen years. I’ve told my children that good things happen to good people. I never mention that captains of industry might behave like shits and get richer, or that children die and certainly a child couldn’t be bad.
I’ve lied to them repeatedly all the while demanding honestly.
The real truth of motherhood can be found somewhere among the lies.
Jessica Gottlieb is a Mom Blogger in Los Angeles.
17 comments
Oh-so-true. And the lying comes so naturally, doesn’t it? Thanks for having Jessica here, she is fabulous!
Jessica is absolutely fabulous! I am thrilled she is here today:) One thing you know she will always give you is the truth…..even when she’s lying to her kids:)LOL
I lie to my children daily. “Did you sleep good mommy?” Hell no child – I mean, yes, thank you for snuggling me all night. The Santa / Tooth Fairy / Easter Bunny / Lucky Leprechaun – all lies, and I use their power frequently.
I know, I am honest normally but I find myself making empty threats that I have to convince them that I will actually follow through. Or when they ask if I love it when they are brushing my hair…(pulling it out of my head) and I just grin and bear it because there really is no alternative. I don’t think of it as Lying so much as creatively positive parenting:)LOL
creative parenting. i can go with that.
So true! Of course, it’s easier to lie convincingly to your children if your mostly tell the truth. They have to trust you, right?
Soooo true. The lies, I mean. So true that we tell lies.
Ed and I wonder when we’ll have to stop, but it sounds like we have a few more years…
Never stop until they figure it out, hopefully , they never do:) I teach my girls not to lie, in fact, I hate liars, I don’t lie. But if they ask, ‘Mommy how do babies get in our tummies” well, we are not ready for that conversation. GEtting out, your vag (*deterrent). Getting in…Uhmmmm, get back to you in 10 year because the answer “vag” may completely blow their little minds and Im not ready to explain it all, nor are they to understand it.Oye…parenting has made a liar outta me!shite!
It’s so true! But the ironic thing is that I get on my kids’ cases about lying. I actually hate people who lie. But when it comes to parenting, I really feel like some lies are necessary! Hah no wonder my kids are messed up jk!
Its called “creative parenting”. We just need to hope that when they become teens they don’t figure us out and start “creative childing” 🙂 the secret to successful parenting is ..Never let them see you sweat!
I was always a really bad liar… until I had a child. It started with Santa and was downhill from there.
I know, I am a terrible liar..good thing they don;t know any better. They still fall for my BS,even when any adult can clearly detect that I am full of bologna:)LOL
This is so true! I’ve never thought about it until now, but I am a big liar. I lie to Harlan all the time and she is only 20 months.
Yeah, but its not really lying because there is no way she can figure it out so it’s not malicious or sneaky:) You really should feel no guilt until they are above the age of reason, then it’s intentional deceit. You’ve got at least a good 5 years:)LOL
I love the doomed line about the brother living with his girlfriend. I feel terrible because I lie all. the. time. Little fibs I like to call them. 😉 Fabulous guest post!
Unfortunately my son Nino is extremely clever when it comes to lies. Maybe I’m just a sucky liar? But I have to work really hard to pull the wool over his eyes nowadays. Thankfully, Diego still believes every word I say.
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