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insomnia, mommy sex and the man cold, man cold, feminine hygiene, U.T.I, motherhood, dad cold

Daddy’s Gone, Mommy’s got Insomnia

by Deborah Cruz

Ok Ladies, I know I am not alone in this phenomenon. But I don’t understand it! I am not afraid of the dark, things going bump in the night, people breaking in, kids not breathing, or becoming random murder victims. Ok, now that I think of it…. maybe I am. I suppose all of those years living so close to Gary, the murder capital of the universe, eventually had to take its toll on my poor psyche! But I’m not there anymore, nowhere near. I am in suburbia heaven! Lush green grass, lots of family neighbors, cul de sacs, SUVs, playdates, etc. I am in the land of La La! Maybe I just need to be perpetually cuddled? I don’t know but what I do know is I need some freaking sleep! Immediately! This is what happens, my husband goes away on business and I can’t sleep. Absolutely can not sleep. I’m talking full-on insomnia in rampant proportions. What makes it worse is that this is NOT a temporary situation, this is the situation. Daddy’s gone and mommy’s got insomnia.

Last week, I was up every night until at least 2 am. The only reason I went to sleep was that I forced myself to shut down all mental functioning in the name of sanity, and for my children’s safety. I am not a morning person when I’ve had less than 6 hours of sleep. 6 hours is the minimum sane functioning level for me, anything less for more than a day and I am full-blown, out-of-my-mind crazy. I do not jest! What do you ladies do to curb this insanity?

I’ve spoken to several friends and it seems the only cure for what ails me is my husband, and that is not a possibility at this point. He’s there working, I’m here…NOT SLEEPING! Sleep medication is not an option because I have to be somewhat lucid in case the girls need me in the middle of the night.

So, here I am, Sleepless in South Bend. I really wish I was a sleep camel, storing it all up on the weekend to get me through the week. Think that’s an option? It is a nifty concept. Of course, when would I fit my husband’s cuddles and conjugal visits in if I were practicing my sleep camel antics on the weekends?

If you have any suggestions for helping me to catch up on my rest, please share. I know a lot of us could use the advice! If not, I say Who’s up for midnight chats? LOL Stay tuned, as the week goes on and my sleep supply dwindles, God only knows what may end up in these posts. Toodles! I need a nap before Big Daddy leaves the building.

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Aging Mommy 2010/03/14 - 4:10 pm

My husband was away just recently for a whole week and as usual I did not sleep well while he was gone. I went to bed later, took forever to fall asleep and then was awake again at 4am wishing desperately for more sleep. Normally I sleep really well but if he is away I don't – I really don't know why as like you I don't believe I am worried about being on my own, but maybe deep down I really am?

Alcohol would definitely work but as you say, dealing with children the next day would then be a bit of a problem!

~J 2010/03/14 - 4:36 pm

I'm the EXACT same way..fortunately I don't have to do it very often..but I'm just a total paranoid mess if I'm holding down the fort!

Boobies 2010/03/14 - 4:36 pm

I'm the EXACT same way..fortunately I don't have to do it very often..but I'm just a total paranoid mess if I'm holding down the fort!

Frances 2010/03/15 - 12:16 pm

I am just like that! I turn on all the lights and lock all the doors and windows. Then and only then can I sleep! And I live in a building where security is so tight, even I can't enter it without an ID! And still I am sleepless when the hubby's not here!!!

One time, when he came home, he said, "You didn't sleep again? And it's so stuffy in here. Why didn't you open the windows?"

"Someone might come in through the windows."

"What! We live on the 33rd floor! Who'd come in?!"


Truthful Mommy 2010/03/16 - 3:35 pm

I love it!!!! Superman!!! Hey, you never know! Superman could be a freak!!! I'm the same way.I end up with both girls in my room, doors shut, windows locked, phone on bedside table…hot as hades in my room. Pretty embarrassing but hey,we gotta feel safe:) It's tough holding down the fort when Daddy's away!

Keurig ,Coffee, Mommy Survival 2011/12/30 - 12:19 pm

[…] Staying up late with my insomnia is great for catching up on emails and writing my posts, but it definitely has its price. You know […]

Sleeping Apart ~ The One Marriage, Two Bedroom Conundrum - The TRUTH About Motherhood 2014/11/11 - 7:47 pm

[…] Big Guy gets up for work every day at 4:30 a.m. I am a night owl, a constant insomniac if we are being truthful, so bedtime for me is normally between midnight and 2 a.m. Add to that the […]

Morgan Myers 2015/03/28 - 3:13 am

My husband is in the military and I deal with this too. I hate it. He was gone for 9 months once, and I was so bad that I began working graveyard shifts at work (9pm-6am) so that I had a routine that allowed me to sleep in the daytime. Even then I was only sleeping 4-6 hours a night, and typically I sleep a ton! I’m talking 9-10 hours average. Sometimes more. I’ve tried everything. Sleeping pills (I don’t have kids so there’s bo reason not to), melatonin, baths, even therapy. Nothing works. The pills only last for 4 hours at most, and I wake up feeling awful. Melatonin does nothing, and everything else feels like a crock. I wish there was a solution. There’s talk of him being gone for a year. I don’t know if I’ll survive that long.

Heather 2018/07/17 - 5:53 am

Right there with ya since 1:39 am this morning and it’s going on 5. Turned on the back and front porch lights, half a dissolvable melatonin, alarm system on…nope, nope and nope. Brain won’t shut down

Laura Powell 2019/09/02 - 9:43 am

Just read this trying to find out how others cope my hubby is away on a course for two days I know it doesn’t sound like much but it’s hard… We have three children oldest is four they help distract but when they are asleep I find it hard pretty much wake every hour checking the time


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