Author

Deborah Cruz

icrescendo fasting work best for women, intermittent fasting, crescendo fasting, fasting for women, weight loss secrets, eating disorders, anorexia

What is Intermittent Fasting and Why does Crescendo Fasting Work

by Deborah Cruz 2018/03/15

Have you ever wondered what is intermittent fasting and why does crescendo fasting work best for women? I never had until a friend of mine lost 80 pounds doing intermittent fasting. Then I got interested, really interested because 80 pounds is a lot of weight and I need to lose at least 100 pounds to be near my goal weight.

I currently weight 254 pounds. Yep. I just said that out loud. Close your jaw. I know it’s shocking. It’s the heaviest I’ve ever been in my entire life and it’s freaking me out. I keep having nightmares that I’m being featured on my 600 lb. life. My goal weight is 137 pounds but for starters, I’d just like to get below 200 pounds.

So intermittent fasting and more specifically, crescendo fasting, is just exactly what it sounds like; fasting intermittently. I’ve done some research and there are several ways to do this but since I was anorexic for a good portion of my teens and twenties, I’ve decided that I should do the least drastic of all the choices; crescendo fasting. Maybe I shouldn’t even be considering intermittent fasting or crescendo fasting since for me restriction is a slippery slope. But I’ve got to try something and crescendo fasting seems reasonable and it’s better hormonally for women.

Being that have to keep a close eye on my hormones and am of the perimenopausal age range ( anywhere between 35 to 50 is perimenopausal) doing anything that could throw my hormones out of whack sounds like a pretty terrible idea. After my experience of juicing, I have learned to listen to my body. Nobody wants manic Debi making an appearance anytime soon and even less so, irritable Debi.

From all those years of anorexic restricting, my metabolism is the worst and since I can’t restrict the way my mind wants to, I’ve just been eating all the food with wild abandon. It’s not like I sit around binge eating (I never was one for binge eating) but I’m an emotional eater. My problem is I live in extremes; eat whatever I want to whenever I want to or don’t eat at all. Exercise incessantly or not at all. I need to find a compromise and a happy medium.

I saw a lot of my friends were trying something new and I started researching to answer the questions what is Intermittent fasting and why does crescendo fasting work best for women?

Currently, I eat whatever I want. Though, honestly, I hate eating. I love food but it gives me nothing but guilt. Yes, I have a love-hate relationship with food. Yes, I have been to a therapist this is how I can identify all of this.

I haven’t been able to exercise properly lately because I’ve been perpetually injured for the past couple of years and that makes even normal movement painful. I want to use this intermittent crescendo fasting as a way to reboot my metabolism; my life. I need to regain some control. I don’t want to weigh 103 pounds like I used to. My goal is 137 pounds but I’d be perfectly happy with 153 pounds (because it’s 100 pounds less than I am today and it’s in my healthy range). Honestly, today, I’d be thrilled to see it get to 199 pounds.

I’m not searching for perfection. I’m searching for less weight on my knees. Shopping off the rack and clothes fitting me right. I want to look nice in the clothing that I like. Be able to sit Indian style on the floor and not cry from the weight on my tailbone. Fall and not break something because there is so much weight on every impact. Feel good when I look in the mirror. To not jiggle when I walk. I want to not feel like my center of gravity is going to make me topple in heels. Be able to dance and not worry about if anything is hanging out. Get out of my head because what my body looks like shouldn’t make me take pause but mostly, I want to be healthy. My goal is to be around to dance at my daughters’ wedding receptions and run around the yard with my grandchildren someday without getting winded.

I know that many of you may be shaking your heads thinking, this sounds like a bad idea. Maybe it is but I have checked with my doctor and it’s not like I’m going days on end without eating because there are other versions of intermittent fasting where people go 24 or 48 hours without eating anything at all. I know that would be a bad idea for me. I get hangry and I turn mean but also, as a former anorexic, I know this would be too comfortable for me and I don’t ever want to go down that road again.

What is Intermittent fasting? Why does Crescendo fasting work best for women?

Rules of Crescendo Fasting:

Fast on 2–3 nonconsecutive days per week (e.g. Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday)
On fasting days, do yoga or light cardio.
Ideally, fast for 12–16 hours.
Eat normally on your strength training/intense exercise days.
Drink plenty of water. (Tea and coffee are okay, too, as long as there is no added milk or sweetener)
After two weeks, feel free to add one more day of fasting.

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I started today along with logging everything I eat and how much. I’ll keep you all posted on my crescendo fasting journey. We’ll give it a try and see if it bears results and I’ll check in once a week on here and let you know how it’s going, what I’ve lost and how I’m feeling.

Update: Fell off the wagon with some traveling. Restarting this journey when 5/16/2018. Updates will follow.

Now that you know the answer to the questions; what is Intermittent fasting? Why does Crescendo fasting work best for women? Will you consider this healthy lifestyle?

2018/03/15 1 comment

run, hide, fight, how to survive an active shooter event, Shelter in place, gun control

News

How to Survive an Active Shooter Event Using Run Hide Fight

by Deborah Cruz 2018/03/07

written by Deborah Cruz

How do you feel about raising kids in a time when it is necessary that they are taught run hide fight protocol as a means to how to survive an active shooter event. It’s not weird to them. It’s the norm and that scares me. There’s even a handy Run. Hide. Fight. pocket card to help you remember what to do in those stressful times.

They don’t even come home freaked out when they are told to run, hide and fight when there is a potential that there might be a “wild polar bear” loose in the hallways. Yeah, that’s what the principal has code-named “active shooters” as to not “frighten” the children. They’re not frightened. I’m terrified and I have been since Sandy Hook. Every single morning at drop off, every time I hear a siren during the school day and I cross my fingers, pray and hope that at pick up two in tack healthy children are returned to me. This is my life.

But our government is having an issue pulling the trigger on common sense gun control, which is ironic because I believe they are all very concerned with the citizens of the United States maintaining their “right to bear arms.” You think at the very least, they’d know how to pull the trigger and shoot.

The bottom line is that people like me want all the guns to magically disappear because we’d feel safer sending our kids to school for 7 hours a day, out from our watchful eye learning to live in the world, like normal people. People who place a higher value on keeping their guns can’t seem to reconcile how to protect our children and keep their right to bear arms. So, they deflect; mental illness, a rogue gunman, anomaly, and my favorite, “the bad guys will still find a way to get guns! I need to be able to protect myself!”

The response is that maybe we should arm our teachers. What? We don’t pay teachers enough money for all the work they do, as is. We entrust our children’s education and safety to them for pennies. It’s insulting really. Teachers should be paid like doctors because as far as I am concerned they are doing something just as important, every single day. Why would we add to their responsibility and give them guns? They are trained to expand our children’s minds not take down an active shooter. They are not trained officers of the law. This is ridiculous.

I would never expect a teacher to be the marksman who has to stand between my child and an active shooter. Have you met a teacher? They are, generally, wonderful, good people who genuinely care about children and want to help them learn and grow in the world. In the moment of truth, I think most teachers would throw themselves in harm’s way to protect their students but they shouldn’t have to. This isn’t the world we should accept. We need to protect both the teachers and the students.

A school shouldn’t be a dangerous place to go. Going to see a movie shouldn’t be risky. Shopping at the mall with your tweens shouldn’t be potentially life-threatening. I, you, we shouldn’t have to hold our breath and pray every single time our children walk out the door that someone doesn’t murder them simply because they can and they have access to guns.

Today, I was scanning my Facebook feed and a video was shared of a thing called “Shelter in Place” which is basically, a bulletproof room built into the classroom equipped with cameras on the outside so that the classroom after loaded into the makeshift panic room can see when it’s clear. They say takes a few days to install and about 30 seconds to load the entire classroom of children and teacher into the “shelter”. I’m wondering what your thoughts are about this?

Here are mine, do I love that it can potentially save my children from a gone wielding maniac? YES! Do I want to live in a world where my children have to live every minute of every single day on the defensive just in case a lunatic with a gun decides he’s having a bad day and wants to shoot them because our government won’t impose common-sense gun control because their egos are more important to them than my child’s life? No!

People have told me that guns don’t kill people, people kill people. This is true but if there were no guns, people couldn’t use guns to kill people. They’ve told me that no matter what.. the “bad people” will always find a way to get guns. And I ask them, is there a secret “bad guy” arms dealer that passes out cards and everyone knows how to find because I’m pretty sure that there are a lot of lazy people out there and if it were harder to get guns, they’d give up trying. Maybe they’d use knives or fists like a real man, give a victim a chance to retaliate.

I’m pretty positive that not every thug on the street or mentally unstable person with an ax to grind would find a gun but when you can walk into any gun store and get one, that makes a difference.

I won’t lie, if it were up to me, no one would have guns but the police and the military because they are trained to use their weapons and that is their job. I get that people don’t like to be stripped of their rights but people also need to realize that the constitution was written at a time when the right to bear arms was necessary. We didn’t have a competent military yet and the people needed to be ready to form a militia and fight if need be. They needed to have their own arms. It was like a BYOB party but the second B was actually a gun and the party was a war. Make sense now?

What I’m saying is that your right to bear arms argument doesn’t hold water these days. Just be honest, you “want” to own firearms because it makes you feel powerful in a world where most of us are powerless. It makes you feel strong in a world where we are vulnerable. But it’s false bravery. A gun is only as effective as the gun owner who is holding it. If you are not properly trained, just because you have a gun doesn’t mean you can actually protect yourself. In fact, you’ll probably just piss off an attacker and he’ll shoot you in the face.

That’s the thing, the bad guys aren’t announcing their attack. They are getting you when you are vulnerable; when you’re sleeping, watching a movie with your kid or your kid is at school trying to figure out that damn common core math or taking the iStep tests. My point is that if the guns were not available, a lot less innocent people would be getting murdered. Statistics don’t lie and as much as you want to argue with me and call me names, you know that is true.

I don’t want to take your guns away from you. I want to keep all of our kids safe. This isn’t about you or making you feel weak; it’s about protecting our children. It’s about not living in a world where our children don’t even scoff or think anything is scary about being taught to run, hide and fight. They just do it. It’s about not having to teach my girls to bob and weave if they escape. It’s about not having to have secret words and panic rooms in classrooms. It’s about not having to worry if your child’s teacher is the sort who would through himself between a bullet and your child. It’s about all of us feeling a little safer, a little braver and a little kinder. It’s about polar bears not being a threat in the hallway, a movie theater, a concert or a mall ever again.

2018/03/07 0 comment

Personal

Why Assuming is a Bad Idea

by Deborah Cruz 2018/03/06

written by Deborah Cruz

Ever wonder where the old adage about why assuming is a bad idea came from? I like to think of myself of as being open-minded yet, a tad cynical. I feel it’s what gives me my “scrappiness”. I’m not doe-eyed and I’ve always been skeptical, just a little bit. I never trust anything 100% because that’s when we make an ass out of me and sometimes you.

Anyways, I must be getting soft in my old age because I forgot my own wisdom and made an assumption about someone. I was wrong. I was very wrong but it reminded me of something, never judge a book by its cover. Get to know the story first.

It also reminded me that you never know what’s going on in someone’s life at any given moment. So that sour puss they are sporting, the one you are judging them for, it may be the best the could muster on this day. Maybe their dog just died. Maybe they just found out they have cancer. Maybe they really need to go to the bathroom and you are what’s standing between them and a bowel accident of epic proportions. The thing is we never know, do we? Bear all of this in mind, when I share the story that reminded me to always get to know the story behind someone. It’s seldom easy and never black and white, so stop judging and dole out a little more kindness and understanding.

There is an elderly gentleman in our neighborhood, who for the better of the past 5 years that I’ve lived in this house, has walked the trails behind our home. I see this man on a daily basis more than I see almost anyone else. He is constantly walking.

Over the years, he has lost weight and gotten in shape. He has smiling eyes and always says hello. He just walks, all year round. Headphones on, head down, walking for infinity.

I won’t lie, somehow from his smiling eyes, stoic determination, and gentle face, I made the leap ( the assumption) that he was most likely an elderly man who had fallen on ill health and rather than give up, he was determined to be in peak physical health. I imagined him beating cancer, heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure and just about any physical ailment that a man his age might be encountering.

In a way, he inspired me. I saw him walking when I was dealing with my own health issues and he inspired me to get hold of myself. I mean if a man at least 30 years my senior could be so dedicated to his cause, I could at least put forth an effort and so, I did and it worked. I’m healthy.

But you know, I never had a real conversation with this man. I talk to a lot of my neighbors but he is always walking and I know how hard it is to stay motivated to work out so I didn’t want to interrupt his groove. I had this whole idea of him that I looked up to. I’d see him from my kitchen window as I washed the dishes or from the laundry room and think to myself, Get it Grandpa! Then, I found out the truth.

One day while talking to another neighbor, who has lived here for many years longer than I have, this elderly man with the smiling eyes walked past and waved to her. She, around his same age, waved back but in an almost annoyed way. I was curious.

I said, “Wow! That guy walks a lot! He must be the healthiest man in the neighborhood. I wish I could be as dedicated to working out as he is. Did something happen to him?”
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“Did he have a heart attack or something? I see him walking constantly, all day long. I assumed he had some kind of health scare that caused the inspiration to walk constantly.”
“Nope, He didn’t have a heart attack. Nothing is wrong with him except he is a drunk!”
Not what I expected, at all. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve known him for many years. He used to be a fall down drunk. Now, he’s a walking drunk. He drinks so much that he gets sloppy and falls into bushes and talks too much to the neighbors. My husband ( a sheriff) has found him in our bushes many times and taken him home.”

Aghast, “WHAT?”

“Yeah, his wife wouldn’t tolerate it anymore so now, he drinks until he’s drunk. Walks it off. Drinks some more and then walks it off. This is what he does all day long. Drinks and walks.”

WTF?? Talk about missing the mark. I was so far off the mark; I wasn’t even on the right continent. I have to admit, I am somewhat disappointed. He’s not an inspiration; he’s just trying to make the best of his shitty situation which when you think about it, isn’t that all any of us is really doing?

Maybe he is an inspiration after all. Obviously, not in the traditional sense. I won’t be joining his workout program anytime soon or anything but he’s making lemon drops out of his lemons and that’s something, right? But it was a gentle reminder, it doesn’t help to make assumptions about other people, good or otherwise, just let the story unfold an get to know people and their stories for what they are not for what you imagine or expect them to be.

2018/03/06 0 comment

Disney Cruise, Disney Dream, Castaway Cruise, Bahamas, Disney Social Media moms Celebration, Disney dream cruise, Walt disney world, #DisneySMMC

Disney Travel

Everything You Need to Know About the Disney Dream Cruise

by Deborah Cruz 2018/03/05

written by Deborah Cruz

Last week at this time, I was debarking from a Disney cruise with my family. We were living the dream, the Disney Dream that is, thanks to Disney Social Media Moms Celebration. Life was magical. Today, not so much. My husband and I both have the flu. Now, I get why they kept handing me sanitized wipes for my hands.

Let me tell you about cruising because a Disney cruise was my first ever cruise. I think the Disney Dream may have ruined me for all other cruises. I’ve always wanted to try a Disney cruise. I love being on the sea, I love traveling with my family and I love, love, love Disney so what was there not to like? But, I had no idea what to expect. I think cruising is one of those things you really need to experience for yourself, like childbirth and marriage, no one can explain in words how it actually feels but I will try.

Cruising on the Disney Dream was like no other vacation we’ve ever had. I used to think to vacation in the great outdoors was the best a family vacation could get but I see now that a Disney cruise gives you the best of both worlds. It was luxury beyond anything I could have imagined. I get why they call it the Disney dream.

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For someone like me, who is always connected, the Disney Dream allowed me to live one of my biggest dreams…being present and in the moment. Yes, I had WiFi and was still connected but not in the same way as I am in my day to day life. I was semi-connected but I was 100% plugged in and present for my life and my family. I was given the gift of time to breathe and exhale and to look around and see all the beauty and wonder that was right in front of me. I think that is a gift that all of us deserve and can use in today’s world of fast-paced living.

I woke up to sunrises on the horizon of the ocean and went to bed with the sounds of the ocean waves lulling me to sleep. It was definitely magical but of course, it was a Disney cruise so I would expect nothing less.

Everything You Need to Know About the Disney Dream Cruise

Excellent service from the cast members from everyone on board, everyone was so kind and generous with their time and efforts just as we’ve all come to expect from all Disney employees.
Amazing food, high-quality meals and options galore. You will eat like a King/Queen while onboard a Disney cruise ship.

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3. Amazing Broadway shows like Beauty and the Beast. It was beyond amazing and as a theater freak, I’m telling you, that it is a must see.

4. More food. There was so much good food, I wished a had more days but I’m not sure my jeans would have survived the trip.

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5. Lots of onboard activities for adults too, so there is no chance of getting bored; beer tasting, mixology course, tequila tasting, BINGO, fitness center, several pools, Aqua Duck, Nightclubs and lounges, Senses Spa and Salon and movie theaters.

Disney Cruise, Disney Dream, Castaway Cruise, Bahamas, Disney Social Media moms Celebration, Disney dream cruise, Walt disney world, #DisneySMMC, aqua duck

6. Relaxation beyond anything you could have ever imagined. There are separate adult only areas and a Spa onboard but beyond that, they’ve even thought of ways to keep the kids occupied so that you can relax.

7. Kids clubs with different age-appropriate activities for kids of all ages. They are full of activities like putt-putt golf, basketball, foosball, dodgeball, crafts, movies and video games to name a few. My girls were at Edge (for kids ages 11-14) and it was amazing because they were in a safe and secure environment being supervised by trained cast members. They got some freedom and it gave us some time alone. It was a nice perk, I hadn’t expected.

8. Thoughtfulness, it is apparent in everything from the towel characters they leave on your bed with the chocolates at turndown service to the royal proclamation of your family upon your arrival. The cast members notice the little things and remember your preferences. It really makes for a special trip.

9. Free 24-hour room service, including Mickey Mouse ice cream bars and pizza.

Disney Cruise, Disney Dream, Castaway Cruise, Bahamas, Disney Social Media moms Celebration, Disney dream cruise, Walt disney world, #DisneySMMC

10. Cleanliness. Our staterooms were spotless and so was everything else on the ship. In fact, they even handed us sanitized wipes before entering all restaurants to help stop the spread of germs.

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11. Unlimited ice cream. This was my daughters’ favorite thing ever. All the soft serve your heart can desire.

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12. Time alone on a private island. Our Disney cruise culminated with us spending our final day on Disney’s Castaway Cay; Disney’s very own private island, perfectly manicured and peaceful right in the middle of the Bahamas. If you’ve never been on a private island, and who of us have been, you are really missing out. It’s having the best of all worlds with just a fraction of the population. We tubed, we rode in a paddle boat, we swam with the fishes, biked and hiked and that was just tip of the iceberg as to what is available. There is parasailing, chartered fishing and so much more but I will save that for another post.

13. You will never forget it and you will be changed for the better once you take a Disney Cruise. The Disney Dream allowed me to slow down enough in my life to set reset and shuffle my priorities. Being with my family on the cruise made me realize how lucky I am and how important and fleeting these next few years are with my family. I want to make the most of every single second. The Disney Dream gave me fresh perspective by letting all the noise of our day-to-day fall away and focus on what’s really important; the people.

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14. Last but not least, the first 24 hours you might experience a sensation of feeling a little unsteady on your legs while the boat is moving. No worries, you just haven’t found your “sea legs” yet. Make sure to take your dramamine before you start to move and you will be fine in no time.

But the Disney Dream is only one ship in a fleet and only one adventure you can take. New itineraries for May through September are available and you can book your very own Disney Cruise starting March 8 at 8 a.m. EST!

Check out the new destinations and set your sights on a high seas vacation brimming with excitement and allure—and be among the first to experience special sailings in Europe, Alaska, the Caribbean or The Bahamas.

This is everything you need to know about the Disney Dream Cruise but if you have any other questions, please leave below and I will answer.

2018/03/05 9 comments

Kia Soul, why buy a kia soul, kia, kiafamily, pros and cons of buying a kia soul

Lifestyle Travel

The KIA Soul Take the Long Way Home

by Deborah Cruz 2018/03/05

written by Deborah Cruz

Have you ever driven a KIA SOUL? I did recently and honestly, I was expecting to be underwhelmed but if you’ve ever wondered why buy a KIA SOUL? I think I may have figured it out. Well, aside from being an award-winning compact crossover and starting as low as $16,200!

Driving for me has always been something that I did to get from here to there. I started driving when I was 13-years-old, (shhh, don’t tell anyone. I don’t want to get retroactively arrested) running simple errands for my mom like picking up milk or toilet paper at the local grocery store. It was only a few blocks away but my parents needed help with 6 kids and I did my part. Fast forward a couple decades and I’m still driving to get kids from school to extracurricular and I’m still running errands. I’m a mom chauffeur and when you have to do something, it becomes menial and not fun.

There have been cars that I prefer over others for one reason or the other but mostly, it boiled down to how well it got me from here to there. Only recently have I really started to consider that driving isn’t just about destinations, it’s about the journey. I know it sounds cheesy but it is true.

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Did you know about the new no-fault law? This was touted as the solution to some of the highest insurance rates in the country.

For me, the car is my decompression space. It’s where I can play the music as loud as I want. Listen to what I want. Drive in silence. When I drive, it’s a little bit like going to church. There is this weird peaceful feeling I get when I am driving alone. You noticed, I said alone. It’s because I am the mom of a tween and teen girl and sometimes the silence in the car when I am alone, is the only thing that gets me through the day.

As I said, I do have my preferences in cars. I’ve driven enough cars to know that some are better than others. And all the bells and whistles can’t make up for subpar engineering. You can definitely tell the difference between a well-made vehicle and a lesser vehicle. It has nothing to do with looks and everything to do with what is under the hood. It’s what’s on the inside that counts.

Also, sometimes we underestimate the performance of a car because it’s cute. I never realized I did this until recently. The way most people assume attractive blonde women are less serious than brunettes. But in the same way we need to get to know people beyond the color of their hair, we need drive a vehicle before we can know anything about how it performs.

Kia Soul, why buy a kia soul, kia, kiafamily, pros and cons of buying a kia soul

I was loaned a KIA SOUL to drive around for a week. My expectations were low. Not because I think KIA is a subpar brand because I know that they are not. I’ve just always associated the KIA SOUL “cute”. The commercials are cute and they come in cute colors and they don’t seem like something I’d take very seriously. Then, I drove one.

The KIA SOUL surprised me because even though it was indeed adorable, it handled like a high-performance, seriously engineered vehicle.

It hugged curves and handled amazingly in the snow and the rain. It was serious on the road and party on the inside, my girls loved the light up speakers that “danced” to the beat of the music. The SOUL is affordable, dependable, well-built, beautiful and cool. So if you don’t have one yet, you can exchange junk cars for cash so you can finally have your own KIA SOUL. Looking for a great place to buy quality cars at low prices? Check out car dealerships indianapolis.

So if you’re still asking yourself, why buy a KIA SOUL, I want to ask you why would you not buy a KIA SOUL?

2018/03/05 1 comment

rise of the real, how to blog, blogger, blogging, daddy bloggers, women's rights

Blogging Personal

Rise of the Real Blogger Top Blogging Trend of 2018

by Deborah Cruz 2018/02/28

written by Deborah Cruz

Rise of the real blogger are the five sweetest words that I’ve ever heard. The most important thing I took away about social media and blogging from Disney Social Media Mom’s Celebration was to just be myself online and trust in who I am as a blogger. The universe not so subtly reminded me to get back to what I’ve always done and trust my gut. Recently, I was told that I was being “too real” when I blog. I’m not even sure how that’s possible but from my understanding, authenticity cannot be manufactured. Real life is seldom perfect and when you present it in a way that is… you’re lying, either to yourself or your audience.

“Rise of the Real, be yourself, Be Authentic, connect with your audience, emotional connections,” these were just a few of the ways I heard the universe telling me to be myself. It is the very premise on which my website was built.

I kept hearing it over again at the Disney Social Media Mom celebration like a whisper following me around. It felt like the universe telling me to stop worrying about what other people were doing. You’ve heard the truth will set you free? Well, I believe it. The moment I started second guessing myself, doubt crept in and it manifested itself in a crippling fear of failure.

I saw other people doing it better and getting bigger and I thought, hey, maybe they know better than I do. But doing what they do didn’t feel right for me because writing for me is more than a means to an end, a creative outlet or a career choice. Writing is a big part of who I am as a person and how I move through the world. I tell my stories because it’s how I process and make sense of life.

Rise of the real is confirmation of what I’ve always believed; honesty is the only way to blog and live.

I share with others because I think we are all connected by our experiences and while they don’t all play out the same way, we all experience them. Life is universal, some of us just do it differently than others. We all do what works for our family, for our lives but we all have those moments of failure and success and even though they may be different, the gut-wrenching pulls of failure and the elation of success (whatever the scale may be) is the same.

I’ve always shared my stories because I knew that people could relate on a human level. But then someone told me to think before I “speak” (write) because being too real can be a turn-off. I almost believed it. To be honest, it sent me into shut down mode. I got a terrible case of writer’s block. Turns out that I can’t overthink every single word I write because if I question every single thing I say or do, I’ll never do anything. I’m a leap first, ask for forgiveness person. It’s who I am and I don’t want to change that.

My stories connect me to you and your comments and responses connect you back to me. So often the online world feels like throwing something out into the abyss and leaving it there but that is not how blogging and social media have worked for me, not at all.

Blogging started for me when I was a new mom, completely disconnected from the outside world. Drowning in motherhood, my blog was me reaching out for someone to throw me a buoy and my readers, those connections/ their stories and ability to relate to what I was going through, they were what kept me afloat. If the stories I share can do that for someone else, it’s all worth it. I know they can because I’ve read the comments and I’ve made the connections with people all over the world through our stories.

A million page views a month may not be in my near future but I have posts that people all over the world have connected with and commented on over and over again. Some of my most personal stories that, if I had used common sense, I would have never hit publish on are some of my most popular because everyone is not perfect. Most of us have a hard time of it. We struggle, we fail and our success, our stories, are in the fact that we keep getting back up. Not that we never fall and never fail but that we keep trying and we overcome.

Someone once told me that people don’t want to read reality because they live it. They said reality is not “positive” enough. I say seeing someone I can relate to triumph through their hard times and succeed in their good times empowers me to do better. It makes me feel like I can do anything and it makes me happy for them. When they are in pain, I cheer for them. I don’t block them from my feed because they are bringing me down. I check in to make sure they are doing okay. My readers and followers are not just names of people I don’t know. We’ve connected. They know my family and in many cases, I know their stories too because they’ve shared in response to my stories. It’s a very organic and symbiotic relationship and I love it.

I get it. Too much negativity is a bummer but life isn’t always unicorns and rainbows and beaches. Sometimes it is. But sometimes it’s ugly cry, raw and hard. But mostly, it’s minutia and daily moments peppered with a good mix of profound bliss and misery. All of those unexpected, uncontrolled moments are what make up a life; beautiful in its glory and agony.

So, I ask you, do you prefer to read about how great someone else’s life is all the time? Or do you prefer the truth? The sometimes amazing beyond anything you could imagine, sometimes horrible and sometimes humorous day-to-day of life. Some days, it’s even downright boring but even in the minutia, it is relatable because who hasn’t been bored in their life? The thing I’ve realized it that it’s not about changing the truth, it’s about the way you tell your stories. It’s all in the narrative.

How do you prefer your blogging, transparency in the blogs you read or a blogger who edits reality to make it prettier?

2018/02/28 2 comments

Mom Life

How to Finally get Caught Up on Laundry?

by Deborah Cruz 2018/02/16

written by Deborah Cruz

Disclaimer: I have been compensated in the form of a Best Buy Gift Card and/or received the product/service at a reduced price or for free but all opinions on how to finally get caught up on laundry are my own.

We are leaving for a huge family trip tomorrow. There are only four of us but it’s an 11-day trip with 4 different changes of venue and it’s on land and sea, in a completely different climate than where we live. There’s been a lot of planning and packing and unearthing of summer clothes.

We leave for our first ever Disney Social Media Mom’s Conference and we’re thrilled but it’s been, seriously, between minus 10 degrees and the 50 degrees it was yesterday. Midwest weather is varied; you can get four seasons in one day if you play your cards right. I checked the weather in Orlando and it’s going to be a solid 87 all week, to a Midwesterner, that roughly translates into about 100 degrees.

The girls have been packed for months. No lie. Tweens get excited and determined and there is no stopping them. Of course, I drive them mad because packing is something I like to do the night before. I’ve done enough traveling in my lifetime that I can pack for a month in about 2 hours but my girls weren’t having it so I had to pack last weekend (I’ve already forgotten what I’ve packed). I also went through their bags and to my dismay found too much of somethings and not one of the vital necessities.

Since they packed in October, they’ve just been adding to the pile (the one that grew atop their actual suitcases) which turned into emergency clothes when they needed them. Basically, they packed and then have been pulling from the luggage for the past few weeks. Their luggage is like a fridge that has a whole bunch of food but none of it goes together to make an actual meal. It was especially missing a couple vital components; undergarments, socks and the vital summer clothes that I had not yet unearthed from the attic.

All the laundry is done. I hate to travel and leave behind a house in disarray and I definitely don’t want to return to laundry. But as I opened the luggage last night to put a couple items into another suitcase because yes, there is separate luggage for each of the 4 venues, I found they had once again pulled from the luggage. So tonight I have to do one last load of towels and a few loads of delicates because underwear, bras and socks for 11 days for 4 people is a lot. And while you can certainly wash socks and underwear with towels, throwing bras in the mix would be a bad idea unless you don’t mind twisting up and ripping up your expensive delicates. This will take more time than I wanted to spend on this task because of having to wash separately. Now, only if there was a way to do them separately at the same time without having to go to a laundromat. Wait. Do they even still have those?

Anyways, there is. LG has a twin washing system. What does that mean? It means I could wash a giant load of towels, undies and socks while also watching my more delicates in a separate load simultaneously. WHAT?? HOW??

The LG SideKick! The ingenious LG SideKick pedestal washer can be added to almost any LG front load washer to tackle two loads of laundry — both large and small — at the same time.

This is perfect for those small loads that are a big deal. LG SideKick is discretely styled with a concealed control panel, it not only functions as a secondary washer but also raises your front-loading washer to a comfortable height and matches the pedestal beneath your LG dryer.

1.0 cu. ft. capacity is just the right size for cleaning smaller loads as often as you need.
Delicates, hand washables, and workout wear get the special care they deserve. Or that late Sunday night uniform shirt that was on the floor on the other side of the bed and has to be clean for Monday morning.
The LG direct drive motor has fewer moving parts for greater efficiency, plus a 10-year warranty
Magnetic remote control offers a convenient way to start, stop, or select a cycle.

The innovative LG TWIN Wash is all about efficiency, helping you get more clothes cleaner in less time. With a combined capacity of up to 6.6 cu. ft., the TWIN Wash boasts an ergonomically elevated and angled door that makes loading and unloading easier. Plus, the LED control panel is located on the door, right at your fingertips.

TurboWash 2.0 feature saves up to 30 minutes on larger loads with outstanding cleaning performance
TurboSteam technology deeply penetrates fabrics for greater cleaning power
The full-width lid helps prevent spills thanks to an easy-to-fill detergent tray with recessed design

This is the best of both worlds and perfect for busy moms who need to multitask to get all the things done. I want this system for my home. If I had it, I could do both loads at the same time and use my time for other things. The LG Twin Wash system which includes LG Front Load laundry paired with LG’s SideKick Pedestal Washer is available at Best Buy

Not only do these washers have mega capacity to tackle any size load, they are energy efficient while giving you the best cleaning performance. Clean clothes that are convenient and good for the environment.

Bonus: From 1/11-4/25 you can receive up to $500 off an LG laundry solution for your home.

2018/02/16 0 comment

florida school shooting, gun control, alan feis, Nikolas Cruz, Parkland Florida, High School shooting

Parenting Throat Punch Thursday

The NRA Murders 17 More People and We Allowed it to Happen

by Deborah Cruz 2018/02/15

written by Deborah Cruz

Yesterday, 17 unsuspecting students and adults, including Aaron Feis, were murdered in a South Florida school shooting massacre by 19 -year-old, Nikolas Cruz. Gun control failed us again. The gunman, Nikolas Cruz, 19, pulled the fire alarm shortly before 3 pm at his former high school, Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland. As the students and faculty exited the building, he started shooting at them like fish in a barrel. But that wasn’t enough for Nikolas, he followed the people running back inside for cover and targeted those huddled in classrooms hiding. Then, he blended in with the students exiting and evacuated the school. He was arrested later that day in Coral Springs.

They’re calling it the “Florida School Shooting” to differentiate it from the other recent school shootings because they happen so frequently now. This is how we measure life and death now, by geographical location. Quick somebody drop a pin so we know where to send the SWAT team next. I’m not being funny. I am utterly disgusted at how little life means to the people of this country. We’ve done nothing since Sandy Hook. Gun control is still the same shit show it ever was.

You know, the world makes fun of helicopter moms but we’re just being rational in an irrational world. How are we ever supposed to let our children go out into the world without worrying ourselves into an early grave? No wonder so many people homeschool now because at least there you can keep your child safe. Thank God for men like Aaron Feis.

Are you there God? Where were you on Ash Wednesday 2018 when 17 people were murdered by a disgruntled ex-student, Nikolas Cruz in the Florida School shooting? What makes a person hate the world so much that they want to kill anyone and everyone that is not as miserable as they are? Don’t tell me mental illness. It’s meanness. It’s calculated. It’s evil and its people killing people with guns because they can because everywhere you turn guns are readily available. If you can’t buy the gun you want, you can buy a gun and modify it. If they won’t sell you a gun because by some miracle your crazy ass is on a list, you can build it by buying parts on the Internet. Why is this not regulated?

Nikolas Cruz has been charged with 17 cases of premeditated murder. News at 11. It was said on one newscast so matter a factly that you would have thought they were talking about a baby monkey being born at the local zoo. What kind of world are we living in? Where is the outrage? Where are the grief-stricken parents of the living students with pitchforks and torches demanding that our government do something? I mean, of course without a whole lot of people make a whole lot of stink the government is not going to do shit because they got paid a whole lot of money not to.

Former classmates said they were not surprised at the identity of the suspected shooter. Cruz loved showing off guns, student Eddie Bonilla told CNN affiliate WFOR.
“We actually, a lot of kids threw jokes around Iike that, saying that he’s the one to shoot up the school, but it turns out everyone predicted it. It’s crazy,” Bonilla recalled.
Why did no one call the police on this kid? He was clearly exhibiting unstable behaviors.
Cruz had once been expelled from the high school over disciplinary problems, Broward County Public Schools Superintendent Robert Runcie said.

He purchased the gun legally. He passed the background check. At 18 you can buy an assault-style weapon but you have to be 21 to buy a handgun. Let that sink in for a minute.

I find it interesting that as they were interviewing former classmates of Nikolas Cruz they were saying things like yeah, sure, Nikolas was the guy most likely to shoot up the school. He had lots of guns. The faculty at one point forbid him from carrying a backpack because of the fear that something exactly like this might happen. Yet, here we are. It happened and instead of anyone stopping him, they all just shake their head and go, we knew he’d do something like this. What the f*ck?

“This has been a day where we’ve seen the worst of humanity. Tomorrow is gonna bring out the best in humanity as we come together to move forward from this unspeakable tragedy,” Runcie said.

This is supposed to be our consolation. Humanity is going to be “better” for a few days.Celebrities are going to tweet out their prayers and condolences. Regular people are going to feign outrage without actually ever doing anything about it becoming themselves willing parts of the problem. Yeah, like the days and weeks after Sandy Hook. Nothing has changed. There are more school shootings than ever. I mean, what are the statistics for the likelihood of your child getting shot or murdered at school these days?

What’s worse, our government makes sure that these weapons are available because it’s a “constitutional right”. So when it’s your kid, or your wife or your husband or mom or dad who gets shot in the face and murdered just living their life tell me how important the freedom to have guns really is. I dare you to. I wouldn’t stand too close to me when you did it.

I keep seeing images of the teacher with ashes on her head, the hero Aaron Feis and a girl with a mylar balloon. It was probably one of the best days of this teen girl’s high school life and now, it will always be one of the worst days of her life. It’s traumatic and I think it’s the worst kind of monster who attacks people at their most vulnerable. Why do these shooters never open fire where there are trained people ready to protect themselves? Because they are cowards and they are afraid. They want to exact horror by murdering innocent, unsuspecting people because then they have the upper hand. Better yet, be a real man, come pick a fight…hand-to-hand with someone your own size and get your ass kicked the way it deserves to be. But they won’t because they are cowards of the worst kind.

But you know who are the bigger cowards? The politicians who allow the NRA to buy their votes. They value money over human life. Worse still the parents who fight for the right to bear arms and then send their children into the world to be slaughtered by people with guns. If not for yourself, do it for your children. Unless we are going to train and start sending every student to school with a weapon to protect themselves or impose real gun control, then we need to all be sterilized because I’d rather not bring a child into this world than to bring one into this world to be murdered by an NRA enthusiast.

We live in a world where every drop off good bye could be “the goodbye”. I know this. You know this. We choose our words more carefully. We hold tighter. We coddle. We spoil because any minute could be the minute someone sprays the hallways of the elementary school with bullets and paints the walls red with the blood of babies… our babies..my babies and your babies. Anyone’s babies because that is the truly scary part, no one is safe. Not even the child of a parent who is a staunch supporter of the NRA because a gunman with a semi-automatic weapon doesn’t stop to ask.

How do you explain to a parent who’s lost everything that your right to bear arms trumps their child’s right to life?

It feels like I’ve written this piece a few hundred times before because I think I have. Why have I? Why does this keep happening? Why does our government stand by and do nothing but come up with sound bites and excuses? Why do we the people accept this? When is enough too much? When it’s our own child whose tiny body lays limp and lifeless in the quad? When it’s our child who cowers and hides for hours as some person with a gun plays a sick game of hide and seek where if you’re found… you’re dead? When it’s your child, who even if they’re lucky enough to survive they are damaged forever. They are not the same child you sent to school that morning and that child may not have died but they are never coming back.

Nikolas Cruz, Parkland Florida, High School shooting

We live in a world where our children have to think fast enough to put their backpacks full of books on before running for their lives just to try to avoid getting shot in the spine. They have to remember to bob and weave. They have to stay silent and stifle tears and terror while their friend a foot away is shot dead in front of them. They have to play dead and pray the shooter doesn’t issue a kill shot to the head “just to be sure”.

Do something!! Stop waiting for your government to figure it out. Demand that they do something to protect our children. When is enough ever going to be enough? How many children have to be slaughtered in the streets, how much blood has to be on our hands before we have the balls to stand united and demand that there be stricter gun control and regulations on parts being bought? We need to make it impossible for everyone to get guns. It shouldn’t be a right, it should be a privilege and if you don’t earn it, you don’t deserve it. If you are not mentally equipped and stable enough to own and trained to operate a weapon, you should not be able to purchase one.

I know gun advocates like to say they need guns to protect themselves from intruders and government. To you I say, 1 you are more likely to be shot with your own gun from an intruder and 2, no gun can protect you from a corrupt government.

But amidst all of this horror, remember the victims like Football coach Aaron Feis who died while using his body to shield three female students. He threw himself in the line of fire to spare them. He suffered a gunshot wound and died after being rushed into surgery. The thing is he shouldn’t have had to die.

“He died the same way he lived — he put himself second,” Lehtio, a student and football team member, said. “He was a very kind soul, a very nice man. He died a hero.”

Don’t let the Florida School shooting and the lives of Aaron Feis and the other 16 people who died yesterday have been in vain. Take action. Demand our government to change our current gun control legislation.

2018/02/15 2 comments

Weight Loss

Why Worrying About Being Skinny is Stupid

by Deborah Cruz 2018/02/12

written by Deborah Cruz

Have you ever looked at a scale and worried if you were skinny enough? Some days people disappoint me in ways that leave me flabbergasted. Insulting someone to their face while extolling the virtues of how great they themselves are. Wouldn’t time be better spent helping others rather than telling others how they could be better if they were more.like.you?

News alert: People know their shortcomings. You never have to tell them. Keep it to yourself. Telling an ugly person they’re ugly doesn’t help them not be ugly, it only makes them feel bad about not being attractive which they were already completely aware of…same goes for being rich, popular, thin and successful. Be who you are, enjoy your win and stop rubbing the loser’s nose in it. It’s petty, shady and just about the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen.

This is not a story about superficial looks. It’s the example I’m using because I used to be vain and shallow. The subject matter is known well to me.

I used to care, more than I should have if I was skinny enough.

Wasting time worrying about getting the perfect body, was my sole purpose in my teens and 20’s to the exclusion of all else. I had a certain idea in mind of what happiness would look like and it all started with being 5’8” and a size zero. My happiness hinged on how skinny I looked; the size of my pants. I knew that if I could “achieve this” hard to reach goal, I could do anything and I would definitely be happy. It was mathematically impossible not to be.

skinny, vanity, weight loss, are eating disorders genetic? , raising girls, tweens, eating disorder, bulimarexia, eating disorders, anorexia, weight

Skinny+tall= beautiful = happiness.

I knew I was smart. I was popular enough. All I needed was the “perfect” body and I would have it all. So, I went after it with all I had, like I did everything in those days. When I get an idea in my head, I get obsessed and so began my obsession. Restriction. Exercise. Expulsion. More restriction. Even more exercise. I was never growing passed my 5’7.5” (God’s way of keeping me humble) but I was going to get that perfect body if it killed me and it almost did.

For 13 years on and off, for 8 years hardcore, I chased the unattainable because it was a moving target. Happiness is not a pant size. I know this because each time I reached my “ideal” weight, I realized I needed to be smaller. Just 5 more pounds, over and over again. I was never happy and always unsatisfied. To be honest, I was miserable because the goals never lived up to the expectations.

skinny, vanity, weight loss,

Then there is now. I’m a grown woman. I’ve finally realized that the most important thing is to be healthy, feel good in your own skin and not give a damn about what other’s think (much easier said than done ).

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve had some health issues, unexpected bumps in the road and I realized how stupid I was to be killing myself to be a certain weight. I am now at a point where, all I want is to be fully functioning, walking upright and to be healthy. That’s when it hit me that wanting to be “skinny”, obsessing over every workout and every piece of food I put into my mouth and trying to impress others with the way I look….that’s stupid. That is a luxury for vain people with nothing substantial to concern themselves with. I am happy for those people. I wish them continued health.

People starving in third world countries don’t obsess over thigh gaps. They are happy to have food in their bellies. People concerned with diabetes and high blood pressure worry about their diet for health reasons, to achieve maximum health not so that their asses look great in a pair of Lululemon. I think to each their own.

None of us know what others are going through. I’ve not lived your life and you’ve not lived mine. We come from different backgrounds, socioeconomic statuses and cultures and what is right for you might not be what is right for me.

I’d never tell you how to live your life, what to wear or not to wear or how to behave because I don’t know your perspective. Only you have lived your life, survived your circumstances or struggles. Your heartbreak, loss and what on the outside looks like negativity, not good enough or “wrong” could be so much better than the day before and could be the very best you have to offer at this time.

In the grand scheme of my life, worrying about being skinny or over weight is stupid unless it affects your health.

I try to consider this as I’ve spent time on both sides. The thing is I want to live my best life. Do my best and be my best me and that has nothing to do with you. Just as how you choose to live your best life has nothing to do with me. Still, I wish us all happiness and success, whatever that might look like to each and every one of us.

2018/02/12 1 comment

dislocated elbow, broken bone, slip and fall

Health

Life Advice Beware the Slick Spots and Make Good Footwear Choices

by Deborah Cruz 2018/01/30

written by Deborah Cruz

Have you ever felt like Samuel Jackson’s character Elijah Price in Unbreakable? I have; I do right now. A week ago today, in a fluke of epic proportions and yet another lesson in bad footwear, I lost my footing in a waterlogged yard and fell, not once but twice and something broke. Put it this way, on the second fall, I was pretty sure that if I had taken my coat off, I would have seen the bones in my arm completely out of their respective positions.

If you’ve been following along for the past couple of years, you know that I broke my leg at my sister’s wedding so severely that I had to have surgery to put my leg back together again. It’s what I affectionately refer to as my Humpty Dumpty Frankenstein leg.

A couple months later, I had to have a second surgery to remove 2 of the screws because all of the physical therapy in the world was not going to allow those screws to let me walk without a limp. It helped and I had an amazing surgeon through the entire ordeal so shout out to Dr. Beuchel who can perform surgical miracles and has the most pleasant bedside manner.

3 months later, my gallbladder decided it wanted in on the fun and I had 2 acute attacks in as many weeks. But since I was a week out from a Disney trip (the same trip I had cancelled the previous October due to the break) I went to Disney with a bum gallbladder and a restricted diet that nearly starved me to death and subsequent removal of a gallbladder that we found was not situated in the usual place. Thankfully, Disney is very accommodating to all diets but there were no Dole whips on that trip I did, however, find the soy shake at the Sci-Fi theater and the ratatouille at Be Our Guest to be uncannily delicious.

A year later, the swelling in my leg had finally gone down enough to remove the outer plate and screws from my leg. This was necessary because I was having pain wearing anything above a flat. I just had this surgery over Christmas break. It’s been feeling great, other than a little tenderness from the accompanying scope I had to remove all the built up excess scar tissue that was causing mobility issues. I was looking forward to going to Disney next month unencumbered. Then the unthinkable happened; a series of almost comedic if not almost deadly unfortunate events.

I went outside. The snow had all melted and I saw that Monday night’s storm had left a giant tree branch atop the girls’ trampoline. Afraid it might tear it, I got dressed went outside and tried to remove it from the netting. Let me explain, this is completely out of character for me. I usually leave all manual labor to the Big Guy because 1) I don’t particularly like it 2) I am accident prone and still, I did it anyway. The first mistake, going outside.

This was not well thought out. I still had my pajamas on. I threw on the first pair of comfy pants I found folded and pulled on my jacket and UGGS. Second mistake, UGGS. They are now in the flip-flop category of shoes that will never be worn again.

I went outside and saw that I could not move the log but instead of going in the house and accepting defeat, I soldiered on. I went to the front of the house to find something for leverage. Mistake number 3 and 4, not quitting and walking to the front of the house.

I spied a shovel by the front door and thought, hmm, this will work for leverage. I stepped off the front porch (next mistake) put my foot into the waterlogged, muddy yard and went down like a ton of bricks. When I went down, my first thought was, “OMG, the plate is out and this leg can break again. OMG, I broke the leg!!!”

I was at this point wailing like a baby and jumped up immediately. This was my 5^th and fatal mistake because I immediately fell right back down, this time with my left arm outstretched searching for salvation but none was to be found.

I heard a pop and I knew, if I pulled off my jacket to look, the bone would be jutting out in the wrong direction. Covered in mud, I gingerly, while full on screaming and hyperventilating because at this point I might have been insane, pulled myself up to my feet. I was shaking uncontrollably and frightened. The pain was indescribable. I had to make it into the house without falling again but first I had to make it all the way to the back of the house, without losing my footing again because of course, the front door was locked. Instead of walking 50 feet in excruciating pain, I got to walk 500 feet.

dislocated elbow, broken bone, slip and fall

I made it, slipping and sliding and crying and screaming the entire way. It was around 9 in the morning so no one was around. I called my husband, who works on the other side of town, and told him to meet me at the hospital and I called my brother who lives a few blocks away and sobbed my way through telling him what had happened and asked for a ride to the ER.

By this time, I think my body was going into shock. I was shaking uncontrollably and feeling faint and vomity just like the time I broke my leg. Everything was hurting. I was just trying to get dressed and cleaned up before I couldn’t move at all. Swelling tends to do that to bone trauma.

Finally, we made it to the Emergency room where I had to wait for about ½ hour before they could get me back. After another 5 hours and several x-rays, they sent me home with a splint and the news that my arm was broke. However, they said they couldn’t see the break because of the swelling and they wouldn’t do an MRI. I had to follow up with my orthopedist. I left in pain and frustrated.

dislocated elbow, broken bone, slip and fall

Thursday, I saw the orthopedist. The verdict is that when I fell, I dislocated my elbow which, thankfully, went back into place on its own. While dislocating my elbow, the trauma from the impact and all the pushing and pulling taking place during the dislocation, I chipped part of my bone off. My doctor didn’t seem too worried about that. I, however, am concerned but thrilled that I don’t have to wear a cast to Disney this year or have surgery.

dislocated elbow, broken bone, slip and fall

I do have a horrific bruise and swelling to contend with today. I have about 3 months of recovery in front of me that includes another week or two of intense pain, a month of wearing a sling and a whole lot of physical therapy. But no cast or surgery, so I am thankful for the small wins.

Tomorrow, I’m going to buy some vitamin D and calcium because apparently, I am up for the role of Elijah Price in M.Night Shamalyns next installment in the series and I really don’t want to be.

The moral of the story kids? Beware life’s slick spots and make good footwear choices!

2018/01/30 1 comment

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