Author

Deborah Cruz

Wordless Wednesday~ Speechless

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/28

written by Deborah Cruz

Wordless Wednesday ~Speechless

2011/09/28 3 comments

Parenting

The Mommy Resume

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/27

written by Deborah Cruz

The Mommy Resume ~Sunday, as many of you already know, was my birthday and I can’t believe I got exactly what I asked for from the Big Guy and my girls. You won’t believe what I asked for. What I asked for is unheard of (no I didn’t ask the Big Guy if I could be the meat in an Alexander Skarsgard/Javier Bardem sandwich… but that is a great idea for some future birthday:) Nope, I asked for the day off. Oh …yes, I did! I asked for the day off from any and all wifely and/or Mommy duties. Yes, you heard me right. I simply opened my mouth and out fell the words. No guilt. No regret. No second-guessing. We all dream of it, but who’d ever have the gall to ask for it? Me!Me!Me!!! I needed to add to my Mommy resume…takes the occasional day off. Let’s be honest, Mommy needed a break. A nap. A timeout. This got me thinking…of all the stuff I do on a daily basis that contributes to my perpetual state of overworked, underpaid and overwhelmed.

HipUndies

All that thinking made me realize how marketable I am..in the real world. Hell, in the business world and in the social media world. I am every single Mommy. And so here it is…

My Mommy Resume

Extreme Multi-Tasking Ninja.
Keen ability to function on little to no sleep, with little to no near-death experiences. 99% child survival rate.
Dog Ears: Ability to hear a crying child from three states away.
Elephant Memory: Remembers absolutely everything applicable (ever read) to children under the age of 13.
Eyes in the back of the head.
Cheetah like reflexes.
Ability to fashion Cheez-its, apple slices, and chicken nuggets into a gourmet meal a la The Pioneer woman meets MacGyver.
Ability to fashion cauliflower, flaxseed, tofu, carrots, and wheatgrass into a sneaky squirrel, yet crunchy, version of a chicken nugget.
Adaptability to constantly changing situations and personalities. People person who loves to engage with her clients; even if it’s over a glass of organic milk in a sippy cup (*but never Apple juice as to not kill the client! J/K) and a game of Candyland.

Keen ability to recall every minute detail of ever occasion that has ever transpired in the lives of each of my children but may forget whether or not I have brushed my teeth or showered. This is not deadly in any way but could be unpleasant for co-workers.( Sorry, nobody’s perfect. If you single people can forget to eat, I can forget to shower!)
Can be needy in a way that does not wreak of desperation, but just enough to let you know that I am hungry enough to get the job done!

Mommy Resume:Unfallable Intuition

Works ~~well~~ best under pressure and on tight deadlines; the more the better. Bring it!
Can subsist on copious amounts of diet coke, wine and leftover Goldfish. (This could prove well when entertaining business clients.)
Can change a DVD, fill a sippy cup, wipe a baby’s butt, Heimlich a toddler, write a dissertation and phone her governor..all while shuttling children between an assortment of classes..but refuses to text while driving.
Technologically savvy~Is a whiz on a blue tooth and proficient at using dragon software (see previous entry). Expert in Photoshop, InDesign, excel, word, WP, Outlook, Google, Quicken, Picnik, Windows, Adobe and a plethora of other programs.
Social Media Mastermind~ Experienced in Twitter, FB, Aboutme, Stumbleupon, Klout and Google+ .
Speaks five languages: English, Spanish, French, Italian and toddler.
Networking Houdini~ Can talk my way into and out of just about any situation: opportunities, frat parties, play groups, PTA, Room Mother, Church activities, Tastefully Simple, Tupperware, or Purse parties, soccer, ballet, chairing boards and etc. You name it. I can get in or out of it.
Can chat up complete strangers and have a serious conversation about the intricacies of a code brown (AKA baby diaper blow out) and then convince the aforementioned party to purchase my brand of diapers, deodorizer, diaper genie, baby shampoo, carpet shampooer and baby detergent.
Can assemble a pack and play, stroller and high chair with one hand tied behind my back while chasing a toddler and mind-melding a tween.
Can disassemble a fort, a Barbie house and a diaper bomb in record time while planning a bake sale, hemming a uniform and playing make-believe with a 4 and 6-year-old.
Extreme negotiating skills~ Can talk a PMSing teenager off a ledge, a 1-year-old out of a tantrum on the spot and a husband into picking up his socks, and putting a new roll of toilet paper on the hanger.
Educated in several schools of higher learning; Purdue University, the University of North Carolina and Eastern Tennessee State University but has acquired the most valuable life education through on the job training.
Most over-educated housewife in the universe. (I could tell you my areas of expertise but then I;d have to dispose of you. Let’s just say covert operations are my specialty.)Can throw an elegant, mentally stimulating dinner party on a budget of $25 that would impress Emily Post and the Queen Mum. This has been proven several times over (refer to Pioneer woman meets MacGyver statement above).
Stable, reliable, dedicated and hardworking.
Can leap tall buildings in single bound.
Can lift cars off of a trapped newborn.
Does it all with style, grace and while not tangling herself in her cape ( OK, the last parts a lie but you get the picture).

What would you add as a skill to your Mommy Resume? I’d love to hear all the skills you’ve acquired through your tenure as a Mommy.

P.S. By the way, thank you all so much for all of the sweet birthday wishes. You made my day. I didn’t hit my 1000 GFC goal but I’ll get there eventually. Meanwhile, I love the readers I have. You, are by far, some of the most intelligent, opinionated, strong and entertaining people that I have the pleasure of “knowing” and I love that I get to include you in my community and that we can share our journey as Mothers with one another! XO We should all add awesome friend to our Mommy Resume.

My Mommy Resume Qualifies Me to be the Benevolent Ruler of the World

2011/09/27 13 comments

Parenting

The List

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/25

written by Deborah Cruz

The List~ This is a post that I first wrote for my good friend, Kit at blogging dangerously, but I can feel the weight of the list breathing me in and breathing me out. It is time to share the list here—–P.S. It’s my birthday today and I will write a post about it later but I would love to cross some things off the list. Reach my goal of 1000 GFC followers on here, 3000 Twitter followers and 500 FB fans! If you love the TRUTH about Motherhood please consider following! XO Debi

Racheal Ashe

The List

Seems more and more often lately, I’ve been finding myself in the most advanced stages of sleep deprivation. I wish I could blame it on late nights of steamy sex with my Big Guy in the conjugalorium or I wish I could blame it on a colicky newborn, no who am I kidding, no way in hell do I wish I could blame it on a colicky newborn. I can’t even blame it on a baby that needs to be breastfed on the regular. No feverish child. No worrisome thought or situation that needs my immediate attention. No, it’s much worse than that. My near-fatal case of sleep deprivation is caused by my incessant need to make list of all the things that I perpetually need to not forget to do. The moment my head hits the pillow, every single thought of the day comes rushing to the surface and I lie there with my eyes wide open as the lists appear in every direction I look. Apparently, in my house, the hours between 11 pm and 1 am are the time period in which I get my one and only reprieve from Mommy brain. It is the time of the list; unending, unforgiving, unrelenting…the list.

These are not the list of wishes that I want to attain; the list of groceries I need to buy or even the list , the endless list of work that I need to complete at any given time. No, they are the list of my life. You know the list of all the shit that any mother has to do the next day, compounded by all the things I don’t want to forget, mix in some groceries, a laundry list of paperwork to be returned to schools, drop-offs and pickups, baths, errands, classes, obligations, playdates, fruit market, work, envelopes for church to be filled, parent-teacher meetings, auditions, uniforms to be pressed, lunches to be made, bills to schedule, cards to mail, birthdays, anniversaries, funerals and weddings and oh yeah, all the things that I must remember not to forget to make sure that my kids don’t end up in ten years worth of therapy because I forgot to put dress down day on the fucking LIST!

The List: Must Remember to:

Buy organic milk. Reach 3000 Twitter followers.Get shoes out of trunk. Bobby pins. Sign up to volunteer. Talk to teacher. Wash jeans sparkly jeans and peace sign shirt (long sleeve not short sleeve) for dress down day. Dress down day. Girl Scouts. Pick up tickets for the ballet. Pick up deodorant for husband. Buy birthday gift for Suzy. Take dog to vet. Call sister to wish happy birthday. Buy shampoo. And conditioner. Oh yeah, Dress down day. Tell husband car is making funny noise. Call the mechanic. Confirm lunch date with friend. Find a new gynecologist. Call the insurance company about bill for unknown service. Refill blood pressure medicine. Dress down day. Make healthy lunch for girls.Reach 500 FB fans. Go to the grocery store to buy healthy food, everything in pantry is crap. Call my mom. Ask doctor for Xanax. Put gas in the car. Do homework with Ella. Make cookies for bake sale. Milk the cows. Go to bakery. Buy cookies. Feed the chickens. Ballet. Iron shirts for husband. Shit! Show up for work. Shave legs. Wax lip. Breathe. Buy wine. Answer emails. Drink wine. Meet husband for intimate time in spare room. Teach Abbi the alphabet. Get girls to sleep in their own beds. Dress down day. Return field trip permission slip. Play date with neighbor. Piano. Student of the week. Zoo. Write a book. Take a nap. Take a shower. Eat. Rinse. Repeat. Hug the kids. Chicago. Halloween costumes. Birthday. Reach 1000 GFC followers on my blog. Dress. Down. Day!

That’s the list for a Monday. If I could just forget all of the things that I need to remember, I could have an 87% chance of surviving my stage 4 sleep deprivation. As it stands, just when I think I’ve forgotten the list and I’ve resigned myself over to the peaceful bliss of Mommy brain, I remember every thought, errand and conversation of the day…the list can’t be killed. Once again, I find myself wide-awake at the wee hours of the night. How can I be expected to raise proper little people with all the list running through my head and holding my sleep hostage? Tonight, I’ll have a glass of wine (or two) and pray for the list to get lost on its journey. Mommy brain, don’t fail me now.

The List that Never Sleeps

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2011/09/25 7 comments

Parenting

Catholic School Girl Gone Nun

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/21

written by Deborah Cruz

Catholic school girl gone Nun~ Is this something that I should be concerned with? I enrolled my little girls in Catholic school because 1) we are Catholic and I loved the spiritual aspect of it 2) I believe faith is instilled not learned 3) the test scores are substantially higher at the Catholic school compared to the public school she would be attending 4) the uniforms are A.dor.able!!!Everyone knows that. But I’ve been noticing that there is a kind of catholic school girl mentality that is seeping in…almost taking over my little girl. Everything is Jesus this and God made me that, which, don’t get me wrong, is sweet but my little catholic school girl seems to be metamorphosing into a little nun. That scares me a little bit.

This is a Good Catholic School Girl

I am very happy that my little catholic school girl is so spiritual and finds such comfort in religion. The other day, she brought home a picture that she had drawn and it read, “God Created me!”. To which I replied, “Well, I think Daddy and I had something to do with it too. But yes, God did bless us with you.” Her reply, ” Mommy, it wasn’t you. It was God.” She was resolute in her answer and that was that. I fully suspect that every time she does anything these days, save for beat on her little sister, she first asks herself…What WOULD Jesus do? I find it absolutely fabulous that she is concerned with the moral ramifications of what she does on a daily basis. I am very proud of her. She is learning her prayers and hymns. Today, she sang in the church choir and presented the wine to the Father. I have never seen her look so proud. Even when she got her part in the Nutcracker last year , she wasn’t this excited. I couldn’t help but puff out my chest a bit and think to myself, Look at my kid. She is amazing. I understood that whole holier than thou saying.

Amazing little Catholic School Girl

But then she came home and set up a prayer station and insists that I must use her vial of holy water , that she brought home, to cross myself each night before our prayers. I suppose that it could be worse, she could go all Angelina on me and carry around a vial of blood. Yes. I did just say that my 6 year old carries around a vial of holy water like a drunk carries a flask of whiskey on his person at all times. I think this may be a bit extreme. Or perhaps, my little catholic school girl is planning on battling Vampires while I sleep. Or maybe she’s just trying to prove her theory that I am, in fact, a witch. Will I melt? Will I not melt? Who knows. Either way, how can I argue with my little girl when she devoutly kneels in front of her makeshift prayer station and prays for her Daddy to return safely from his business trip or for or house to sell. My little girl really is amazing. She’s certainly a better person than I am. But I can’t help being a little concerned about the accelerated speed at which she is embracing her faith. I fear that by next year she will be choosing her ordination habit.

Have you ever experienced this? Am I the only one? Am I over analyzing? I mean, honestly, I should be thrilled that she is embracing something positive, right? This is what I wanted. I think. I wanted my children to be spiritual and have a solid foundation in their faith. I guess I just never realized just how young children are when they start becoming who they will be. I don’t know how I feel about that. It’s like ringing a bell. You can’t un-ring it. I guess I just thought I had more time before she chose her path in life but I feel like she’s already forming opinions and beliefs and that is amazing and a little bit scary to me. My little catholic school girl is growing up so fast.

Extreme Catholic School Girl

2011/09/21 8 comments

Blogging

The Howard Hughes of Blogging

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/20

written by Deborah Cruz

Blogging~ I started blogging because I am a writer, or so I fancy myself to be anyways. I started blogging because I was told that it was the thing to do to build my online presence; to build a portfolio and to network. Instead, blogging has become friends, support, social media, cheerleaders and camaraderie. Blogging has become so much more than I could have expected but in the end, the goal is to be a writer. Blogging was supposed to be the gateway drug to a regular column somewhere,online or in print, I didn’t care; a book about nothing; a way to make a living doing something that I love, sharing my soul. My goal in blogging is to be seen as a writer, not a journalist (I’m no journalist) but perhaps a storyteller who tells a story that is relate-able and thought provoking. Blogging was supposed to parlay into something more.

Blogging the first step

I know everyone says, there’s no money in blogging unless you are either 1) a huge famous blogger 2) you are selling your space for advertising 3) you are selling your soul for sponsored posts (let’s be clear, there is nothing wrong with sponsored posts if you believe in the product, I love to share a good product. And we all need to eat. I just can’t do ONLY sponsored posts.) but I wanted to be the exception and be a writer. I wanted to bloggy style leap frog my way into the writing world. I guess it’s the difference between working on a sitcom and starring in Les Miserable on Broadway. It’s all how you look at it. I love blogging but I love Broadway. I think that I’ve done pretty good with figuring out this blogging stuff. It’s been over 2 years and people tell me that my content is good. I want to believe them but then I realize, maybe, they are just blowing smoke up my ass. It’s not unheard of. You know unicorns and rainbows and all that? Of course it’s nice to hear nice things said about yourself but if what you’re doing is not working and no one gives you any constructive criticism how can you fix the problem. You won’t. You will stay stagnant. I don’t want sunshine and unicorns blown up my ass, I want the truth.I want to move forward.

I see my friends getting writing jobs. I am thrilled for them. I really am. Hell, I’ve even put people in touch with other bloggers to do jobs that I think they would be a good fit for. Why not? What goes around comes around , right? I love helping my fellow bloggers find success. Of course, I’d like to reach some of my goals too. But I feel like I’m treading water and I don’t know the next step. I find amazing opportunities and then they never come to fruition. It’s frustrating. Initial contact only to never have my response email not responded to, lofty promises that always fall flat, and potential writing jobs that never materialize.Maybe the problem is that I want to be paid but I can’t be bought. I know many of you have been there, or are there right this moment. I find myself sometimes wondering if it’s worth it. The time away from my girls, the lack of sleep, the time away from my husband…I feel ,on some days, that my blog is a metaphorical money pit and the currency is my soul. I’m constantly putting into it but I’m not really getting any substantial return. I feel like every opportunity is forced and I have to push and claw my way into it, just to be considered. All of these vote for me popularity contests, how do they gauge what kind of writer/blogger you really are if the person who annoys people the most for votes is the one who wins. That means they should rename the contest to most annoying blogger, right? The bigger your blogging numbers, the more opportunities that you will be provided, right? Traffic costs time. You have to dedicate a good amount of time socializing and how are you supposed to be a good Mommy blogger, if you are not being a good Mommy? They say content is king, but if that is true and if people are being honest with me about my content…then shouldn’t I be further along?

Blogging my way

I’m nowhere. I’m nobody. I’m a woman behind a computer screen giving away bits of my soul but maybe that’s not enough. Maybe I’m not confident enough or maybe I’m overconfident. Who knows? Blogging is a field that is a mystery cloaked in secrecy and hidden by competition, for the most part. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve met some AMAZING bloggers who have given me great advice. Genuinely wonderful women who freely answer any and all of my countless questions about blogging, without them, I would be lost. You know who you are. I won’t name names for fear that your Twitter inboxs will blow up. But I need honesty. This is your chance, I want HONEST feedback. What do you really think about The TRUTH about Motherhood?

Have you ever felt this way? Like everyone else has it figured out but you? Like everyone else is getting the opportunities but you? Like everyone else is doing it better than you are? I know that it takes hard work and that people earn their opportunities. I just want to know what I need to do to prove myself. Can’t wait to hear your feedback, criticisms and commiseration. What did you do to push past the plateau? Have you made the leap from blogger to published and paid writer? Any advice? I feel like I am becoming the Howard Hughes of blogging over here alone with my kookie ideas and reclusivity, minus the money… of course!

Blogging; when’s enough , enough?

2011/09/20 14 comments

Parenting

Growing up Too Fast~ What the Eff Ever Mom!

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/19

written by Deborah Cruz

Growing up too fast is no bueno. Yeah, I heard that collective groan. I did it myself today. Today was the Mommy equivalent to premature evacuation. You know what I mean about growing up too fast? Those days when your kid does something ahead of schedule? Don’t get me wrong, sometimes growing up too fast is awesome. 5 year old picks up her clothes, toys and fixes her bed..ahead of the curve. Awesome. 1.5 year old potty trains on her own. AWESOME! 3 year old can read…AWESOME! 4 year old can wipe her own ass! SUPER AWESOME!

Stop Growing Up Too Fast

But then there are those instances of growing up too fast that just plain suck. Having your child realize that there is no Santa, Easter bunny or tooth fairy…before they are 18 sucks. Having your little girl notice boys at the age of 5, not awesome. Having your little girl go through precocious puberty…definitely NOT awesome. Not being the biggest, brightest, end all be all to your children…so not awesome. But having your little one let go of you before you are ready to let go of them, may be the absolute worst case of growing up too fast! Growing up too fast is my least favorite thing about children, it goes hand in hand with all of this letting go business.

This morning, after dropping both girls off and leaving my husband at the airport, I braved the drizzly, cold morning and ventured back out to pick up my preschooler. She is sunshine on any rainy day. Her little smile grabs hold of my heart and wraps itself around it and hugs me from the inside out. It’s magical. I look forward t picking her up from school because I know when our eyes meet, I’m going to get the smile and that means that much needed hug from the inside out..especially on a cold, rainy Monday.

Slow Your Roll little girl, Your growing Up too fast

Today, after only 2 weeks of needing me to walk up to the door at pick up and begging me not to leave her alone at preschool every morning, she practically rolled her eyes at me. She walked out the door, side by side with another little girl. I was so happy, she’s made a friend. My heart swooned but the swooning didn’t last long. Her eyes met mine, she let go of her friend’s hand,promptly rolled her eyes “the OMG,this needy bitch again” was audible to my Mommy heart. She grabbed my hand to lead me to the car. I could feel the ” Well, come on let’s get on with it already. Let the ruining of my life commence!” Remember when you were in high school and you were in a relationship and it was over but neither on e of you had the balls to say so. The feeling of you’re holding me back find a new project already.Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. We’ve all been the giver and receiver in this scenario. I just never thought I’d be receiving it from my 4 year old, maybe when she was 15 but not now. It’s too soon. This is a prime example of GROWING UP TOO DAMN FAST!

We made our way to the car, she hurried me as if I had embarrassed her in some substantial way. When we arrived at the car, she quickly ushered me in and left me wondering, when the hell did I become an embarrassment. Wasn’t it just this morning that I was her everything?

Abbi: “Mommy, Guess what?” She sounded really serious, like we were about to have the birds and bees talk.

Me: “What, sweetie?”

Abbi: “Uhhhm, I don’t think you need to pick me up at the door anymore. I’m a big girl now. I’ll just walk out with my friends. OK?”

WTF? Isn’t the 4 year old version of it’s not you, it’s me speech? My head was spinning. I won’t lie, I was a little offended. Did I tell you that last week , she said it’s okay if I don’t lose all my weight because she’ll just tell people that I’m having a baby! Holy hell, who is this kid and what did she do with my sunshine? Give her back…now!

Me: “But don’t you want me to walk up to the door and walk you to the car anymore?”

Abbi: “Naaahhh!” Translation: What the Eff every Mom, get over it! I’m a big girl now!

With that, she tossed her hair, walked away, got in the car and buckled her own car seat. I’m pretty sure I was thrust 10 years into the future in that moment and I’m also pretty sure that I sprouted a new gray hair! Has your kid already cut you loose? What was it? How did they do it? How did you survive being broken up with by your little one? I’m not sure how much my Mommy heart can handle of this growing up too fast.

Babies Growing Up too Fast

2011/09/19 6 comments

Leaving on a Jet Plane, traveling for work

Marriage and Relationships

Leaving on a Jet Plane~ Boston Bound

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/18

written by Deborah Cruz

Leaving On a Jet Plane

Leaving on a Jet Plane~ This is the sort of Sunday that I thought our family was done with forever. The Big Guy has a business trip this week. It’s only for 3 days and that’s infinitely better than the commuter marriage we were dealing with the last couple of years. Nonetheless, the bitter sting of the past 2 years lingers around us like slow rising fog. We are cloaked and covered in it’s residue of pain. The girls are just coming to terms with their abandonment issues and we are all just getting used to the fact that we are together and nobody is leaving. When the Big Guy told the girls at bedtime tonight that he would be leaving for Boston in the morning for a few days, it quickly became evident just how open the wound still is.

Please No More Leaving,Daddy

Abbi immediately started hyperventilating crying and leopard spotting when she realized he was leaving . The Big Guy tried to console her, as his own heart took some painful cuts. Concurrently, Ella is standing there in stoic, quiet solitude as her lip quivered and her eyes fill with tears at the thought of yet another goodbye. I wanted, so badly, to reach out to them ( all three of them) and reassure them that this is just a business trip but for my girls, there is no such thing as JUST a short business trip. In the end, every time he leaves now…it is him leaving us. They’ve spent too many Sunday’s saying goodbye at their tender ages and it has taken it’s toll. Tonight, the Big Guy laid down to read stories as they gathered around and nestled into him. The three of them fell asleep in a blissful dreamy blur. One of the most beautiful things a Mom can ever see is the man she loves loving their children so completely. We had planned to spend the night together, he and I, snuggled close. Sometimes the cologne on his body transfers itself to my nightgown, such a small thing but a luxury when you are so used to someone leaving. Tonight my simple sacrifice will go a long way in our daughters’ hearts. These are the moments they will look back on and remember, the small gestures of us loving them. I love the way my Big Guy loves our littles and in his loving them, I love him more than I ever thought was possible. I hope the next three days are the fastest we’ve ever experienced. Absence, in small doses, makes the hearts grow fonder and the return home that much more sweet.

Leaving is Just Returning to Someplace Else

2011/09/18 4 comments

Weight Loss

One Mommy’s Journey to Learning to Love the Skin She’s In

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/17

written by Deborah Cruz

Weight loss~ As I told many of you about a month ago, I have started training with a personal trainer because I want to finally take weight loss to the next level. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I’ve wanted to beat this weight loss demon into submission for a long time and I’ve tried just about everything under the sun to lose the weight. Sure things worked, but weight loss is not a destination, it’s a journey. Weight loss is the longest and hardest journey that you will probably ever endure in your lifetime. I know it is mine but finding comfort in my own skin will be absolutely worth it.

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Week 1

Weight Loss Journey week 1

I have been working out with my personal trainer/little brother Jose for 4 weeks now. We work out 3 days a week for about 2 hours. I do an hour on the recumbent bike ( burning a whopping 400-500 calories….can you say awesome!) and then he works me out for an additional hour with a mix of cardio, strength training and the weight machine. It is exhausting but I want that weight loss and the comfort it will bring in my own skin. Let’s be honest here, I was NOT in the best shape. I have barely worked out all summer. This little plan of his kicks my ass, no joke. But these are my options, stay overweight, unhappy and unhealthy or work my tail off (literally) for this weight loss. Yes, on my last physical I found out that my blood pressure was slightly elevated and cholesterol and sugar were both elevated. This is my body on little to no exercise and crappy food options. I made wrong food choices and got very lazy. That is it. I did this to myself. No one force fed me pizza and french fries. Nobody made me hit the drive-thru at Dairy Queen. I did it all and , now, I must work harder than I’ve ever worked in my entire life to get back into shape. I can tell you, it is much easier putting weight on than taking it off. I’ve also discovered this thing called a Bosu ball.I had never heard of it before but my brother swears by it and I know it surely kicks my ass. It’s basically one of those exercise balls cut in half and put on a stand, whatever it is..it works your abs in a ridiculous way. You will be sore but you will lose inches.

No more waiting on weight loss

Speaking of inches, ahem, I have lost 7 inches on my body. Of course, I have been building muscle so some spots have actually gained an inch ( I’m talking to you juicy bootie) but I did ask my trainer to focus on getting me a derriere, so I blame myself. I can feel my core is much stronger and I have more energy. I don’t feel as slovenly as I had been feeling and I can feel everything tightening up. I actually did jumping jacks the other day. JUMPING.JACKS!! I know, they sound harmless but let me tell you I haven’t done jumping jacks in YEARS! Have you? Who does that anymore? They are so 1977! When he told me to do them, I really wanted to sucker punch him…in the face. I immediately had a vision of a hidden camera and me doing jumping jacks on YOUTUBE.The humiliation. I mean I’m no Scarlett Johansson. I thought of all the different body parts that would be going in different directions in slow motion ( because everything humiliating happens in slow Mo, right?) But, I asked for this and I’ve committed myself to losing this weight like I’ve committed myself to my marriage. I am ALL in. So, you know what I did? I jumped and I jacked and I didn’t get a black eye and my loose stomach didn’t have to be lassoed in, even my bat wing arms stayed relatively in control. It felt good to do it. And when I was done,my little brother told me how awesome of a job I did and how proud he is of me. I bet Bob and Jillian don’t give hugs to their sweaty messes after a particularly brutal workout.

This week, I added to it the power of Weight Watchers. I’ve done Weight Watchers before and it seems to work really well for me. I think it’s the blend of being able to eat the foods I want, in moderation and within points, tracking every single bite, taste and sip that enters my pie-hole and the accountability. I’m not doing meetings this time because I am accountable to my trainer , my scale and you guys. But the online tools seem to be really keeping me on track with my food. This morning I stepped slowly onto my awesome new Eat Smart GoFit scale,which I will post about so you can all see for yourself how truly amazing this thing is, and there was a loss. After five days on the WW points system, I have lost…3.8 pounds. I’m thinking I should have started the points system from the start but I really needed to get in a routine with the working out. That is usually where my hiccup lies. I am pretty happy with these results. I am kicking weight loss ass, slowly…but surely. Here’s my 4 weeks of personal training photo.

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Week 4; This picture looks bigger because I am closer to the camera but what can I say..my photographer is 4! I work with what I got:)

I realize that it doesn’t look drastically different BUT I also realize that change takes time. I didn’t gain a shit ton of weight in a day and I won’t lose it in a day. The difference this time, from all the other times, I know that eventually I will feel comfortable in my own skin. If I continue putting in the effort at the gym, paying attention to what I put in my mouth, portion sizes and only eating when I am hungry and not when I am bored, nervous, stressed, angry or sad; the weight has to come off. It has to because if it doesn’t come off with Weight Watchers and kick ass personal training sessions, then there is something very wrong with my metabolism and I will be forced to trade it in for one that works. I was asked by a couple readers to keep you all posted so I will try to do an update post once a month with a photo. Maybe if I ever have the good sense to put my make up on before the photo is taken, I can remove that lovely big pink “KaPow” sign off of my face. Have any of you ever undertaken a weight loss journey? What did you do it? How did it work out? What keeps you motivated to get healthy? What is your favorite weight loss tool? Share your weight loss stories, we can be each others weight loss cheerleaders.

Weight Loss ~Learning to love the Skin I’m in

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2011/09/17 7 comments

Tech Weight Loss

Eat Smart Precision GoFit Digital Body Fat Bathroom Scale Review

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/17

written by Deborah Cruz

Behold Eat Smart~ Precision GoFit Digital Scale

What is it? Eat Smart ~Precision GoFit Body Fat Bathroom Scale The Eat Smart Precision GoFit Digital Body Fat Bathroom Scale is not your ordinary bathroom scale, as it can quickly and easily measure weight, body fat, body water, body muscle and bone mass using new ITO BIA (Bio-Electrical Impedance Analysis) technology. BIA sends a safe, low-level electrical current through the body (you hardly feel it…J/k you don’t feel it at all), which allows the Precision GoFit to analyze the body in real time all in one step. ONE STEP! There’s no need for weighing and measuring separate times. I love it because as a very busy mom, like most of you, I don’t have a lot of time to focus on me and this incorporates everything I need to do to keep my weight on track into one step, allowing me to spend time on me without feeling like I’m taking away valuable time somewhere else. The sleek design, touch screen interface and automatic person identifier (stores personal data for up to 8 users) make the Eat Smart Precision GoFit Digital body fat bathroom scale one of the most user friendly bathroom scales I’ve ever had the pleasure of owning and it actually looks good in my bathroom. Bonus!

What does it say it will do?

Eat Smart Precision GoFit scale product Features

Measuring Functions: % Body Fat, % Total Body Water, % Muscle Mass and Bone Mass
400 pound capacity
Proprietary Automatic User Identification Technology; Stores personal data for up to 8 users
Eat Smart “Step-On” Technology – Get instant readings with no tapping to turn on!
Large 3.5″ Blue LCD displays with white backlight – Easy to read.
Auto Calibrated; Auto Power-Off; Runs on 4 AAA batteries (included); 100% Eat Smart Satisfaction Guarantee

Does it do what it says it will do? The Eat Smart Precision GoFit Digital Body Fat Bathroom scale does everything it promises and I love it. I love it because I have started a new journey and this scale is playing a big part in helping me to reach my destination. I have been spending a lot of time working out and logging food, counting points and making wise choices. It’s nice to have this tool that is so user friendly and when it lights up, it’s little blue light is affirmation that what I am doing is working. In fact, this morning when I weighed in for the week, I was pleasantly surprised to know that my Total body water (TBW), Body Fat, Muscle mass and Bone mass are in within normal ranges now. This was not the case a month ago. I know that my hard work and discipline is what is prompting the change in my body and my health; there is no magic pill. But the Eat Smart precision GoFit body fat Bathroom scale is my accountability. I need the accountability, as much as I need the portion control, workouts and healthy food choices. It all works in unison to reach my weight loss destination. The Eat Smart Precision GoFit Body Fat Bathroom Scale is the perfect weight loss tool for the busy mom on the go.

*Disclaimer: I was provided with an Eat Smart Precision GoFit Digital Body Fat Bathroom Scale for review purposes. All thoughts and opinions expressed are my own. Eat Smart.

Eat Smart,Live Long & Prosper

2011/09/17 2 comments

Tech

EatSmart Precision GoFit Body Fat Bathroom scale

by Deborah Cruz 2011/09/17

written by Deborah Cruz

Behold EatSmart~ Precision GoFit Digital Scale

What is it? Eat Smart ~Precision GoFit Body Fat Bathroom Scale The EatSmart Precision GoFit Digital Body Fat Bathroom Scale is not your ordinary bathroom scale, as it can quickly and easily measure weight, body fat, body water, body muscle and bone mass using new ITO BIA (Bio-Electrical Impedance Analysis) technology. BIA sends a safe, low-level electrical current through the body (you hardly feel it…J/k you don’t feel it at all), which allows the Precision GoFit to analyze the body in real time all in one step. ONE STEP! There’s no need for weighing and measuring separate times. I love it because as a very busy mom, like most of you, I don’t have a lot of time to focus on me and this incorporates everything I need to do to keep my weight on track into one step, allowing me to spend time on me without feeling like I’m taking away valuable time somewhere else. The sleek design, touch screen interface and automatic person identifier (stores personal data for up to 8 users) make the EatSmart Precision GoFit Digital body fat bathroom scale one of the most user friendly bathroom scales I’ve ever had the pleasure of owning and it actually looks good in my bathroom. Bonus!

What does it say it will do?

EatSmart Precision GoFit scale product Features

Measuring Functions: % Body Fat, % Total Body Water, % Muscle Mass and Bone Mass
400 pound capacity
Proprietary Automatic User Identification Technology; Stores personal data for up to 8 users
EatSmart “Step-On” Technology – Get instant readings with no tapping to turn on!
Large 3.5″ Blue LCD displays with white backlight – Easy to read.
Auto Calibrated; Auto Power-Off; Runs on 4 AAA batteries (included); 100% Eat Smart Satisfaction Guarantee

Does it do what it says it will do? The EatSmart Precision GoFit Digital Body Fat Bathroom scale does everything it promises and I love it. I love it because I have started a new journey and this scale is playing a big part in helping me to reach my destination. I have been spending a lot of time working out and logging food, counting points and making wise choices. It’s nice to have this tool that is so user friendly and when it lights up, it’s little blue light is affirmation that what I am doing is working. In fact, this morning when I weighed in for the week, I was pleasantly surprised to know that my Total body water (TBW), Body Fat, Muscle mass and Bone mass are in within normal ranges now. This was not the case a month ago. I know that my hard work and discipline is what is prompting the change in my body and my health; there is no magic pill. But the Eat Smart precision GoFit body fat Bathroom scale is my accountability. I need the accountability, as much as I need the portion control, workouts and healthy food choices. It all works in unison to reach my weight loss destination. The Eat Smart Precision GoFit Body Fat Bathroom Scale is the perfect weight loss tool for the busy mom on the go.

Do you need to consult a manual or is it “User Friendly”? The Eat Smart Precision GOFit Body Fat Bathroom Scale is so easy to use. Pop the batteries in (which are provided) flip it over, step on it once to calibrate, step off and then step back on. Voila. You are done Instantly, you will have your weight, body fat, body water, body muscle and bone mass! EatSmart is the future of scales and the future is now. EatSmart!

EatSmart , Live Long & Prosper

2011/09/17 1 comment

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