Apparently, TLC is hell bent on skewing reality so badly that they are actively trying to change the curve even worse than they already have with toddlers and tiaras. TLC, the channel who used to bring us informative information about hermaphrodites, little people and people so obese that they had to be cut out of their homes has decided that it takes a village to ruin childhood…and they want to be the mayor of that village. That’s right people, MTV has some definite competition. Well, I can say this,  MTV has at least the decency to wait until our children are teenagers or tweens to provide them with an arsenal of extraneous sex, bad language, and examples of lewd and lascivious lifestyles to emulate.TLC has, however, decided that if you want to destroy a child’s life completely and in its entirety you need to get a much earlier start. You know, don’t put off til tomorrow what you can destroy today!

First, there was Toddlers and Tiaras. Don’t get me started. I know some people find it entertaining to see little girls dressed up like whores by their morbidly obese , white trash mothers and paraded about like prize cattle..all in the name of “My daughter’s  the prettiest and I know this because I just spent $4000 for my daughter to win a $500 scholarship and the title of “pretty girl” How fucking ridiculous is this? What are we teaching our daughters? Oh yes, that’s right…we are doing our solid best to perpetuate the myth that our daughters only worth is in what they look like and what’s between their legs. WHY? Can we all repeat after me, JON BENET RAMSEY! You see how that turned out? Is this really what we want for our girls? Spray on tans. Flippers for little girls missing teeth. Hair pieces. Whore make up. Revealing clothing.Suggestive dancing. Little girls having complete mental meltdowns because they are being taught, by their mothers who are supposed to love them unconditionally, that they are only worthy of love if they are wearing a bedazzled tiara because these broads are living vicariously through their little girls. Just one more reason to support my theory that some people needed to take an IQ test before being allowed to conceive!

Now, TLC, has kicked it up a notch. TLC has seen fit to develop a show called Outrageous Kid Parties. I know you are thinking, so what? I mean, I thought I was a little over the top inviting 100 people to my Bella’s 1st birthday party. Or a little silly that every year my girls have a themed birthday party complete with costumes. Yes, last year we did have a Moulin Rouge themed birthday party for a 5 year old. What can I say, the kid is theatrical. We’ve had Fancy Nancy tea parties that were so extravagantly catered ( by my husband and I ) that people asked who we had cater the function. We’ve had cakes brought in special from a bakery in Chicago.Then there was the Bellapalooza incident of 2009. I’m not going to lie. I put a lot of time, thought, love and sometimes money into my girls’ birthday parties. I think it has a lot more to do with giving them what my parent’s couldn’t afford to give me. But never..NEVER would, could, should I spend $32,000 on a kids party. Aside from the fact that I couldn’t afford it without taking out a second mortgage on my house ( which, by the way, I’m saving for their weddings), I would never want to do something so completely insane. Jeez people, this just in..Kids starving in Africa while you are paying $3000 for a birthday cake!WTF????

That’s right, TLC, has taken the whole My super sweet 16 MTV show and made its very own version for the toddler/elementary school set. It is so ridiculous that it may actually make my head spin right off my neck. This annoys me for several reasons.One, who can live up to these unbelievable standards? Two, what are we teaching our children? The celebration of one’s birthday should be to commemorate the day they were born, not the  day their parents went broke. Are we trying to raise a generation of gold diggers? Has no one heard the saying “Everything in moderation”? Excess of anything, even a good thing is NO BUENO!!! What’s next, TLC presents Skins for babies? What? Don’t look so shocked. With everything else TLC has deemed reasonable, why not?

What are your thoughts on excessive extravagance for children? What are we teaching our children? Or do you think as long as we can afford it, the sky is the limit? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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